Men, Babies and Other Disasters
by Awela
Summary: Kurt, the 30-year-old fashion designer is desperate for a child. He visits a fertility clinic but he soon realizes that getting pregnant won't be that easy at all. One night, he bumps into cute and hot Blaine and makes a quick decision. Just one night with a stranger… Blaine doesn't even have to about it. Too bad Blaine is everywhere Kurt goes and avoiding him gets so complicated.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi Everyone!**

 **As I guess you already know, I love Klaine mpreg stories. I already have the first few chapters written, so I decided to finally publish this. I hope you will like it just as much as I do.**

Kurt Hummel had planned every single moment of his life. He had planned to work for a few years after college, meet a nice man and get married. And then, around 30, have his first child. And then another one, if he and his partner felt ready for that. His life had started as planned. He had gotten a great job at Vogue, way before he had finished his studies, so the first important point of his plan was granted. He only had to get the other one, the partner he needed before having the child he wanted to badly.

But that was where things went wrong.

While working hard for a good position, Kurt had had no time to date. Years had passed so quickly and before he realized what was happening, he turned 30. He woke up that morning like every single day, made himself a coffee and sat down in his living room. He was halfway done with his drink when he realized what day it was. His birthday. His 30th birthday to be exact.

Kurt sighed sadly and put his mug down. It should have been an amazing day. He should have celebrated it with his family, his husband, with their child. Because that was how he had planned things. It wasn't like he considered himself old, not at all. He was still young and healthy, so he had no reason to be desperate. Okay, he shouldn't have been but he was. He had to be rational. His mother had died when he had been a small child and his father wasn't too healthy either, although he wasn't even 55. With such a history, even if he was careful, Kurt couldn't be sure if he lived long enough to raise his children, not if he didn't start his own family sometime soon.

But how could he do it when he didn't have a partner for that? He didn't want to be a single dad. He wanted to get married first, to the person he loved, and have children from him. He was lucky because he was one of the carriers, men with a special gene that allowed them to get pregnant. Since he had a chance to get pregnant with his child, he never considered adoption. No, he wanted to experience every single moment of parenthood, from the first pregnancy to the moment his child took breath the first time. But then, again, he had no partner for that. He was all alone and he couldn't even be sure he would meet someone anytime soon.

So the day of Kurt's birthday started like a horrible one. He got ready and went to work, deciding to act like this day wasn't an important one. But as time passed, he found himself thinking more and more about babies. He didn't want to give up his plan to become father of at least one child. He wanted it so badly. More than getting married. Yes, he would be willing to give up his chance to marry the person he loved if it meant he could have a child. He wanted. it. He needed it.

By the time his lunch break ended, he already had a plan. A crazy one but it was a plan. And his plans usually worked. He loved plans. He was good in them. So he decided to do what women in his situation often did: he called a fertility clinic and made an appointment. It was a rushed decision but he knew himself. He would think too much about if he gave himself time and he would convince himself that he had enough time left. He would waste another year or more searching for love and he would run out of time while doing so. No. He wouldn't let that happen. He had given himself enough time to find someone he could love but the dozens of dates from the previous years proved that he was better on his own. He had never gotten through the first month, he had always found something in the other men he didn't like. Some of them were always late, others wanted sex too early. They were too short. Or too tall. Talked too much. Didn't talk enough. So it was better if he stopped searching and focused on more important things. Like getting pregnant.

He was lucky. They could see him the next day. Kurt didn't like waiting, so he agreed immediately. That was it. He would get pregnant soon. He had no idea how it worked but it couldn't be that complicated. He was healthy, he could easily get pregnant. He just had to pick out a nice looking guy and get his sperms. Who knew, maybe he would be pregnant by the time he celebrated his birthday with his friends that weekend. Kurt smiled at the thought. Yes, it would be amazing.

By the time he arrived at the clinic the next day, he was nervous. It was a huge step after all. Once he walked out of this building, he wouldn't be alone anymore. There would be a little life inside of him, someone he had to take care of for the rest of his life. Still, Kurt didn't regret his decision. He wanted this. He wanted that child so badly.

He was annoyed by how many papers he had to fill. They asked him about everything, his lifestyle, his job, his hobbies, his family, literally everything. So Kurt took a deep breath and spent the next hour going through all those questions, telling himself over and over again that it was necessary to have the baby he wanted. They needed his answers to get him the best donor. Kurt didn't care what the other man looked like, he still hoped that he would see a picture of him before getting his sperms. And some information wouldn't hurt either. He wanted someone healthy and clever. His baby had to get the best genes possible.

"Please, take a seat" the assistant said as she led Kurt into a room where it was just the two of them. "Doctor Morris will be here soon."

"Thank you" Kurt said and leaned back on the chair, taking a deep breath.

He was still nervous and a little bit scared. Because it was all new for him but he had to get used to it if he got pregnant. Although he was lucky because his best friend was a gynecologist, too, Kurt wasn't sure if he could help him with this. He didn't even have a chance to talk to him. Sebastian was out of the city and wouldn't be back for a week or so. And Kurt couldn't wait so long. Not to mention that asking for his friend's help in such a thing… No. It was better to leave Sebastian out of it.

The door opened and a middle aged man stepped inside. Kurt sat up excitedly. It had to be the doctor.

"Mr Hummel" the man nodded towards him and took a seat beside him. "I'm Doctor Morris."

"Thank you for seeing me so early" Kurt said.

"I looked into your files. So you are a carrier?" the doctor asked.

"Yes" Kurt nodded. "A perfectly healthy one. Absolutely ready to get pregnant."

"We'll see" the doctor laughed. "We can make a few tests today and my assistant will call you once we get the results. Then you can make another appointment for the next tests."

"Oh" Kurt said in surprise. "Do you have to run more tests?"

"Of course" the doctor said. "We have to make sure you're ready for a baby."

"I'm ready" Kurt said quickly. "Really, I know what I'm doing. I have everything to raise a child and I can't wait to get pregnant."

"If everything goes well, we can start the process within a few weeks" the doctor said.

"I have to wait so long?" Kurt asked.

"Of course" the doctor smiled again as if he was explaining things to a small child. "It'll take months if you are lucky. Most carriers don't get pregnant too easily, so there's a chance that we have to repeat the insemination."

"Why do I have a feeling that I have to wait between inseminations?" Kurt asked.

"Your body has to get ready for the new one" the doctor said. "So yes. We have to wait a few weeks if not more to try again."

Now Kurt was really disappointed. He had thought that it was an easy process but the doctor scared him. What if he wouldn't have a child anytime soon? What if it wouldn't happen within the next few years? He would be too old to have a baby in the end… He had been such an idiot. He had wasted precious years from his life and now he was running out of time...

"This is not the answer you expected" the doctor said knowingly.

"I thought it was a lot simpler" Kurt muttered.

"We have to make sure both you and your baby is healthy" the doctor said. "So we have to be careful."

"Especially since I'm a man" Kurt grimanced. Life was so cruel.

"As I said, we can make a few tests today and talk about the next steps when we get the results. Do you still want it?" the doctor asked.

"Yes" Kurt said without hesitation. "I want to have a child. If I have to wait for years, I will."

"Let's be positive and hope that it won't take you so long" the doctor said.

"So where do we start?" Kurt asked.

The doctor reached for something on the table beside them and Kurt gulped nervously as his eyes landed on the long needle in the doctor's hand.

"Blood samples" the doctor said.

"Of course" Kurt muttered. He had a bad feeling that it would only get worse. He had to get used to it.

Half an hour later, he finally left the clinic. He tried not to be too upset but he couldn't stop worrying. He had been so stupid… He had thought that getting pregnant was easy but now he had to go through a very long process and even after that he couldn't be sure if he would have a child on his own. Maybe he should consider adoption… It would be a lot faster and easier for sure.

He decided to get himself a coffee and checked on his phone on his way to his favourite coffee shop. Rachel had called him several times, it must have been something important, so he quickly called her back.

"God, I called you like a hundred times" Rachel said when she answered the call.

"Only six times" Kurt corrected her. "What is so important?"

"Somebody isn't in a good mood today" Rachel said.

"I have a long and awfully busy day" Kurt said. "So why did you call me?"

"Oh, I know we agreed to organize a small party for you…"

"Oh, no. Please" Kurt groaned.

"...But it's your 30th birthday! It's a huge thing!" Rachel continued. "Do you remember that new club just across the street?"

"I don't want to celebrate my birthday with a lot of people I don't even know" Kurt said.

"But it'll be fun" Rachel said. "I won't take no as answer. You have to move out, meet new people…"

"I don't want to meet new people" Kurt said.

"I'll be there for you at 7 on Saturday" Rachel said. "Wear something sexy."

"But…"

She disconnected the call before Kurt could say more.

"Great" he muttered. "As if I would hook up with some stranger."

Kurt shook his head and pushed his phone back into his pocket, completely unaware of how that night would change his life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I'm sorry for the long delay. I was abroad because of an international conference and I didn't have any time for my stories. But I'm finally back, so here is the second chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **I have to say, I'm taken aback by how many of you are interested in this story. Thank you for your support! I hope I won't disappoint you.**

"No. Absolutely not."

Kurt rolled his eyes and turned around to leave Rachel in the living room. Why she was doing this, he had no idea. It wasn't like he didn't look good. Well, good enough to move out but nothing special. He really wasn't in the mood. He only wanted a peaceful night with his friends and not flirting with every men who came across. He had no idea why Rachel couldn't leave him alone.

"Rachel, I already told you. I only want to celebrate my birthday with you and the others. I don't need people staring at me" he said.

"Come on, you are 30" Rachel said as she joined him in the bedroom. "You have been alone for… how long? Two years?"

"Almost three" Kurt muttered.

"See? You have to move out, so you have a chance to meet someone" Rachel said. "I know you want that."

Kurt opened his mouth to tell her that he had decided to give up on men and focus on having a baby instead but stopped before he could say anything. Rachel wouldn't understand. Nobody would. His friends were all in relationship, they had no idea what it was like when he tried and tried again and failed every time. No. They didn't have to know, not until he was sure he was pregnant with a healthy child.

"Wear this" Rachel said suddenly as she pulled out a black shirt from Kurt's wardrobe.

"No" Kurt said with wide eyes as his eyes landed on the shirt. He had bought it years earlier for a date that had ended… Well, not the best way. He didn't want to wear that shirt again.

"But Kurt…"

"I don't want to change clothes, okay?" Kurt said in frustration. "I'm fine, Rachel. You don't have to tell me what to wear or how to act. You don't even know what I want!"

"Hey, I didn't mean to…"

"Then stop it!" Kurt almost shouted. "It's my birthday and I want to celebrate it with my friends. I don't need anything else."

"Okay" Rachel said quietly, looking away.

"Wait… How many people will be there?" Kurt asked carefully.

"Uhm… Some?" Rachel said hesitantly.

"Rachel."

"It's your 30th birthday!"

"I can't believe you are doing this to me" Kurt sighed.

"You will love it" Rachel said as she walked behind Kurt and put her hands on his shoulders. "Come on. We don't want to be late."

Kurt considered calling off the night but he knew he couldn't do that. His friends would find him wherever he went, not to mention that they had spent a lot of time preparing for this night. So he took a deep breath and decided that he would enjoy the night whatever happened.

"Okay. Let's go" he said.

"Perfect" Rachel smiled. "We're going to have so much fun."

"Sure" Kurt muttered. He really needed a drink.

It turned out that his friends invited half of the city for the night. Kurt looked around nervously. There were a lot of people he didn't even know, he had no idea what they were doing there. He needed a whole minute to find a familiar face, his stepbrother. And then Sam and Mercedes. Santana and Brittany. And that was all. He had no idea where his other friends were, maybe lost somewhere in this crowd. Damn… Rachel and her crazy ideas.

"Happy birthday, little bro" Finn said as he pulled Kurt into his arms.

"Welcome to the 30s" Santana said. "What is it like?"

"Like being 29" Kurt answered.

"It's a lot better" Sam said and pressed a drink into Kurt's hands. "This is where real life begins."

"Really?" Mercedes asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Uhm… That's what they say" Sam said uncomfortably.

"Sure" Mercedes smiled.

"Come on. I wanna dance" Rachel said as she grabbed Kurt's free hand and started pulling him towards the dance floor.

Kurt relaxed a bit as he danced with his friends, probably because of the drinks he got from his friends. He had no idea how many he had but it was enough to feel warm and happy all the time. He was careful not to get drunk, he was old enough not to do such a mistake again, but he felt relaxed and it was so good.

Well, for a while.

Time passed and his friends became drunk. Kurt soon realized that he was left alone on the dance floor with his cocktail. The others were dancing with their partners, moving slowly at the romantic song. Kurt sighed as he stepped back and watched them. He was fine being alone most of the times but he felt so lonely when they were together like this. He often found himself left out of everything because the others had their loved ones, something he was missing. It usually didn't bother him so much but now… Now he wished he had someone like them. He wanted to dance with somebody, he wanted to pull someone close and whisper to his ears. He wanted someone in his life who walked him home, someone he could invite into his apartment, have a drink with him and talk until dawn… Something he couldn't find, not even after years of dating. Maybe he was stupid to believe that such people existed.

He decided to take a walk outside and clear his head a bit. The last cocktail he had was stronger than the others and his head hurt. He needed fresh air and he wanted to get away from the loud music that made his headache a lot worse. Not to mention the people. He still wasn't comfortable with so many strangers around him. He knew that his friends only wanted the best for him but he really didn't need this. He wanted to go home and sleep, that was what he needed right now. But he didn't want to hurt the others, not when they had worked so hard to make this night unforgettable for him. It wasn't their fault that Kurt couldn't enjoy the party.

"Hello, birthday boy."

Kurt rolled his eyes as he turned around to face the other man. This night was bad enough without a stranger picking at him. He would just teach this guy that he better left Kurt Hummel alone.

But as he turned around and his eyes landed on the guy leaning against the wall right beside him, he stopped. Because the guy in front of him was hot. Not just hot, he was probably the hottest man he had ever seen.

"I see you like the sight" the man smirked.

That was enough to pull him back to reality and forget about how great this man looked.

"It could be worse" he said.

"Ouch" the man said. "Just when I thought you liked me."

"If you are searching for sex, I'm not that type" Kurt said and quickly started walking back towards the door to find his friends inside.

"Wait!" the man said as he caught up with him. "I didn't mean anything like that, okay? I'm just nervous. And when I'm nervous, I say stupid things."

Kurt stopped again and waited until the man got in front of him to take a better look of him. The guy seemed honest, somewhat desperate, and very-very sober for some reason. So not like everyone else inside.

"What are you doing out here?" Kurt asked as he crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"I saw that you left and I came to check on you" the man said.

"Why would you do that?" Kurt frowned.

"Because you seemed upset and… I don't know. Maybe I wanted to cheer you up? It's your birthday after all. You shouldn't feel so bad" the man said.

"You are weird" Kurt said.

"That's what my friends say, too" the man shrugged.

"So how exactly want you to cheer me up?" Kurt asked, unable to hide his smile. He already liked this guy.

"I could take you to a ride with my motorbike" the man replied.

"And you think I would sit on the motorbike of someone I don't even know and is probably drunk?" Kurt asked.

"I'm not drunk" the guy said. "I didn't drink at all. I never do. And my name is Blaine. Now that you know it, I'm not a stranger anymore."

Kurt tried his best not to laugh but he failed. This man – Blaine – was nothing like the men he had met before. It was so easy to feel well with him.

"So… are you in?" Blaine asked.

"I'm in" Kurt said in the end.

"Very good" Blaine nodded.

He took Kurt's hand and led him to his vehicle, a shiny red motor parking right in front of the club. He took the helmet from the motor and pushed it into Kurt's hand.

"Take this. I don't want anything happen to you" Blaine said.

"What about you?" Kurt asked.

"I have another one" Blaine said as he took out another helmet from… somewhere. He was so quick that Kurt didn't even see where he had gotten it.

"I'm Kurt, by the way" Kurt said as he took his place behind Blaine.

"I know, birthday boy" Blaine said.

"Stop calling me that" Kurt said.

"But you are the birthday boy" Blaine pointed out.

"I'm 30. I'm not a boy anymore" Kurt said.

"True" Blaine agreed. "You should put your arms around me. It'll be safer."

Kurt couldn't believe he let a complete stranger take him away from the club and bring him somewhere but he couldn't make himself care in that moment. Maybe because of the alcohol in his system, maybe because Blaine seemed so nice, but he didn't worry about what could happen to him at all. He closed his eyes as they sped up and enjoyed the cool air, the noises the motorbike made and the warmth of the man sitting in front of him.

~ o ~

"How do you know Sam?" Kurt asked later that night – or better that morning – after they had returned and he had offered Blaine a drink in his apartment.

Being with Blaine was nice. The man had taken him to the river, they had watched the sunrise together and then Blaine had bought him breakfast before bringing Kurt home. Kurt didn't want to say goodbye, not yet. He had to get to know this man better. So he invited Blaine to his place and to his surprise, the man said yes. He offered Blaine some wine he found in his fridge but as he had said earlier, Blaine didn't drink. He accepted a coffee, though, something Kurt needed just as well, and they sat down in his living room to enjoy their drinks and chat a little more.

"We work together" Blaine said.

"Are you a model, too?" Kurt asked in surprise.

"No" Blaine laughed. "Do I look like one?"

He could have been one. Blaine's body looked amazing, he was muscular, okay, maybe a little short but that really didn't matter when he was so hot.

"You could be" Kurt said before he could stop himself.

"So you do like the sight" Blaine smirked.

"It's not bad" Kurt shrugged.

"You aren't that bad either" Blaine replied. "Especially since you spend most of your days sitting at your desk."

"I work out a lot" Kurt said.

"I can tell" Blaine nodded.

"So what do you do at the agency?" Kurt asked.

"I'm a photographer" Blaine said.

"It must be an interesting job" Kurt said.

"Well, if you like listening to the models' hysterics all the time…" Blaine shrugged.

"Don't tell me you don't enjoy being around sexy women all the time" Kurt said.

"I thought I made it clear that I'm not interested in women" Blaine said.

Kurt took a deep breath. Okay, Blaine had been flirting with him since he had found him outside of the club but still… It was different now that he said it out loud. Especially as he leaned closer to him to whisper into his ear.

"I don't like models" he said. "I'm searching for something else."

"And what would it be?" Kurt asked.

Blaine pressed a soft kiss to Kurt's neck. And then another. And another. Kurt tried to tell himself that this wasn't okay, that he barely knew this guy and he never did such things, but it had been so long since he had been with someone and Blaine was so hot and talented and...

"Tell me if you want me to stop" Blaine whispered.

Kurt closed his eyes and let the other man unbutton his shirt. Blaine moved his lips down his body, to his chest, his stomach, right until the waistband of his pants. That was the moment when Kurt decided what he wanted to do. He didn't care about the consequences anymore, he could worry about them later. Now he wanted Blaine, naked, in his bed.

"Bedroom. Now" he said.

"Show the way" Blaine smirked.

Kurt grabbed his hand and pulled him into his bedroom. He quickly shut the door behind them and pushed Blaine to the wall. He leaned against him immediately, gripped Blaine's hair and pressed his lips to Blaine's.

"Good kisser" Blaine murmured.

"You too" Kurt said.

They soon moved to Kurt's bed and quickly got out of their clothes. Kurt found himself lying in the bed, with Blaine all over him. The man had his wrists pinned down, he kept kissing and sucking on his neck and pressing his body to his. Kurt tried not to moan but he failed. It had been so long and Blaine's touch felt so great… He felt like he could lose it in any second.

"We-we should slow down a bit" Kurt said.

"Why?" Blaine asked as he leaned down to gently kiss the head of Kurt's cock.

"I-I might…"

"Relax" Blaine said gently. "Don't hold it back. Just enjoy the moment."

He wrapped his lips around Kurt's cock before the man could protest. Kurt opened his mouth to tell Blaine that he wouldn't last too long but all he could do was moan in pleasure. He hadn't realized how much he needed this, not until Blaine started to work on his cock. As he thought, he couldn't hold it back for too long. Only a few minutes later, he cried out and came into Blaine's mouth.

"God, I'm sorry" Kurt breathed. "I-I…"

"I know" Blaine said as he leaned over Kurt again and kissed him on his lips. "Don't worry, honey. I'm done with you."

Kurt didn't think he could get hard so soon again, he had never been able to do it twice without taking a break, but Blaine… Blaine was so talented. He had no idea how he had it but his body reacted on Blaine's touch almost immediately. As Blaine started kissing him again and reached between his legs, Kurt felt himself getting hard again.

"That's it, beautiful" Blaine whispered. "I know you want it."

"Lu-lube" Kurt stuttered. "Drawer."

Blaine opened the drawer and took out the small bottle of lube. He poured it onto his fingers and moved away from Kurt a little to open his legs wider. Kurt reached out to stroke Blaine's dark curls as the man slowly moved one finger around his hole before gently pushing it in. Kurt inhaled deeply at the feeling of the finger inside of him. It didn't hurt but it felt weird after so much time. He closed his eyes and tried to relax. It wasn't hard when Blaine's talented hands caressed his body, making him forget about what he was doing between his legs.

"You are ready for me, baby" Blaine said as he pulled out his fingers and kissed Kurt again. "Condom?"

Kurt opened his mouth to tell Blaine where to find them but then stopped as a crazy thought crossed his mind. It was so stupid but still… In that moment, it seemed so right. He remembered what the doctor had said at the fertility clinic, that he had to get through several tests, months of waiting, failures… He had thought that it was his only way to get pregnant, so he had accepted it. But things changed so quickly. Now here he was, sharing his bed with another man, a hot man on the top of that who was nice and funny, just what he needed. Blaine was probably healthy, too, he didn't drink and he probably eat very healthily. He was perfect.

But could he do it? Could he lie to Blaine and have sex with him when he had such secret thoughts?

Yes, an evil little voice told him. You don't know him. You don't want anything more from him. It's just one night and you won't see him ever again. He'll never find out.

Kurt made his decision.

"We don't need one" he said. "I mean… I'm clean and if you are, too…"

"I am" Blaine said immediately.

"I want to enjoy it. I want to feel you in me" Kurt said.

Blaine smirked and pressed another kiss to Kurt's lips.

"Then enjoy it, babe" he said.

He slowly pushed his cock inside and waited for Kurt to be ready. When the man got used to the feeling, he nodded, letting Blaine know that he could move. Blaine slowly pulled his cock out and then pushed it back inside. He repeated it slowly a few times, until Kurt relaxed a bit and he was ready for more.

"Faster" Kurt whispered.

He wrapped his legs around Blaine's waist to pull him closer and grabbed the back of his neck to kiss the man. Blaine moaned into the kiss and put one arm around Kurt, closing the small distance between them. Kurt had no idea how he could move like this, let alone keep up speed, but it looked like Blaine knew very well what he was doing. Yes, he certainly did. He must have had a lot of experience. It made Kurt worried for a second that he might have made a mistake by agreeing with this but he pushed the thought to the back of his mind. He didn't want to think about it now. Or anything else. He would worry later for sure but now he just wanted to enjoy the moment.

Blaine reached between his legs again and gently stroked his cock a few times, then grabbed Kurt's legs, one by one, and pushed them up a bit, so he had better access to his ass. The way Kurt moaned under him, his voice becoming louder and more desperate with every movement told Blaine that he was close. And he wanted to see him come before he joined him, too. He grabbed Kurt's cock again before he felt himself getting close and ran his hand up and down on it, fast, just as fast as he kept moving inside of him. It made the trick. It always did. Just seconds later, when Blaine felt like he couldn't hold it back anymore, Kurt cried out and came between them.

Blaine didn't need more then a second to follow him, coming hard inside of Kurt as he pressed his lips down onto Kurt's one more time, suppressing a moan.

They became silent for a while, only their heavy breathing to be heard. They stayed like that for a while, Blaine still inside of Kurt, staring into each other's eyes from close. And then, when his breathing slowed down a bit, Blaine slowly pulled out of Kurt and lay down beside him, putting his arms around the other man.

"I knew you would be incredible" Blaine said after a while. "I knew from the first moment I saw you. But this… This was better than I imagined."

Kurt kept his eyes on the ceiling, not saying anything. Blaine must have thought that he was exhausted because he remained silent after that. He closed his eyes and a few minutes later, Kurt heard him snoring quietly. He had fallen asleep. Kurt closed his eyes, too, but he knew he wouldn't be able to fall asleep, not after this. Guilt already found him, just after the moment it happened. He had lied to Blaine. He had taken advantage of him. He had taken more than what Blaine believed. But still… He felt like he made the right decision. It was the fastest way to get what he wanted and it wasn't like he would see Blaine again. He would make sure he didn't. He would tell Blaine that it was all, that he didn't want anything else from him, he would thank him for the night and then get over him.

And wait for the day he could make the test. Kurt looked down at his stomach. It was too early to tell anything but he already knew that he succeeded. He felt it. He was pregnant or at least he would be very soon. Just a few more days and he would be sure.

Surprisingly, Kurt fell asleep in Blaine's arms very quickly, guilt gone, at least for a while, only happy images filling his mind. Images of a child he had been waiting for so long.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I'm glad you liked the previous chapter. I hope you enjoy this one, too. Have a wonderful weekend!**

Kurt was panicking. What had seemed like a good idea for a moment the previous night, it was a horrible one the next morning. How could he do such a thing to another person? He had never considered himself a terrible person. Okay, he wasn't perfect but this… He had to do something.

It was still early in the morning but he was already in his kitchen, staring down at the coffee he had made for himself. The liquid was already cold but he hadn't had a single sip of it. He felt sick. He knew that it wasn't because the previous night had been successful, it was still too early to say that. No. It was because he was the most horrible person of the world and he felt guilty for using someone like this. Someone who was still sleeping in his bedroom, not knowing what Kurt had done to him the previous night.

Kurt grabbed the edge of the counter and took a deep breath. He had to tell Blaine. He had to admit everything and deal with the consequences. Blaine needed to know. He would be angry for sure, he would yell at him and possibly ask Kurt to take the right steps, making sure he wouldn't get pregnant from the previous night's sex. That was the right thing to do, after all. Blaine didn't want this, he didn't even know that it was possible, so it was the right thing to discuss everything with him and then make sure their paths didn't cross ever again. Yeah, that was what Blaine wanted for sure. And it would be right. Kurt had to tell him everything.

But deep inside, Kurt knew that he wouldn't tell Blaine. Not only because he was scared of his reaction but also because he didn't want to. It was just one night after all. He didn't know Blaine, he would never see him again, so why should he bother him with such things when they wouldn't meet ever again? Besides, if they were successful the previous night…

Kurt took a deep breath and looked down at his stomach. There was no evidence that he was pregnant, there wouldn't be for two weeks or so, but he already felt it. It was hard to explain but he had that strange feeling, a very pleasant one, one that calmed his nerves even in this stressful situation. He had read about this so much. His body couldn't feel it yet but his mind already knew that he was going to be the father of a beautiful child.

And here he was again, back at the start, unable to decide what would be the best. He wanted to tell Blaine, he really did, but he would just risk losing the child he wanted so much. More than being honest with a guy he barely knew. He had been waiting for this for so long, he had gone through so much in his life, he had suffered so much, he certainly deserved to have a child on his own without going through months of tests and desperate waiting, failures… Right? Because he wasn't a bad person. Maybe he made a mistake here or there but he deserved to become parent of a child. And he was running out of time. He wouldn't be younger and if he lost this child, who knew if he would have a chance to have another one. Not like he would kill his own blood. No way. He would just say goodbye to Blaine and pretend that this night never happened. Nobody needed to know the truth. Yes, that was what he had to do.

Suddenly, gently arms sneaked around his waist from behind and he yelped in surprise. He quickly turned around and pushed the man away, realizing too late that it was Blaine. Blaine, the father of his baby. He had forgotten about him completely.

"I'm sorry" Kurt said quickly. "I just… You…"

"I know. Sorry" Blaine said awkwardly. "I just saw you standing there and… It was a bad idea."

Blaine had no idea why Kurt was acting like this. Of course not, how could he? Kurt felt worse than before. He had to tell him that it was all. He had to get rid of Blaine before he did something stupid like telling him about his secret or something worse. Yeah, he had to tell Blaine that… How did people do this? He couldn't really say that 'Hey, thanks for fucking me yesterday but now you should go', right? No. That would be rude. But how...

"Would you like a coffee?" Kurt asked the first thing that came into his mind, knowing that it was the worst thing possible he could have come up with. He had to make Blaine leave, not stay longer.

"Sure" Blaine smiled.

Kurt quickly turned away from him and took deep breaths as he prepared the coffee for the other man, trying to calm his nerves. It was fine. Blaine didn't know anything, he would never find out. He would just drink his coffee and leave. Kurt hadn't promised anything more, Blaine surely knew that it would happen. He would understand.

Or not… Kurt felt the man's hands on his waist again and he almost dropped the mug he held in his hands. He quickly turned around and took a step away from Blaine, trying not to be too weird.

"Here's your coffee" he said. "Uhm… Do you want to take a shower?"

What am I doing?

"Only if you accompany me" Blaine said flirtily.

He had to stop. Now. Before he made things worse than they already were.

"Look, Blaine…" Kurt started, looking away.

"Oh" Blaine said quietly. "Oh. I… Oh."

"What we did last night was nice but…"

"Do you have somebody else?" Blaine asked.

God, how could he be so adorable?

"No" Kurt said. "It's not that. You're a great guy and I really enjoyed what we had but… The time isn't right."

Blaine seemed to understand. Good. Kurt really didn't want to break his heart but it was better to end it now before things turned worse. That was the only way.

"It's fine" Blaine said. "Really, I get it. It's not like we agreed in anything…"

"Right" Kurt nodded.

"Uhm… Can I drink this before I go?" Blaine asked.

Kurt finally looked into his eyes. It was a bad idea. He wanted to kiss Blaine more than before.

"Of course" he said and hastily turned away. He had to keep calm. He couldn't show hesitance because Blaine would misunderstand it and Kurt would be too weak to say no and then… No. Blaine had to get out of his life.

"Thank you for the coffee" Blaine said after a few minutes of silence that bothered Kurt so much. "I was honest with you. I really enjoyed last night. If you feel lonely again…"

He grabbed Kurt's arm, turned him around and pushed a small piece of paper into his hand.

"Just call me" Blaine whispered into his ear.

Kurt thought that he would kiss him but Blaine stepped back after staring into his eyes for a long moment. He winked one more time and than walked out of the room. Kurt followed him in complete silence until they reached the front door. Blaine opened the door for himself, nodded towards him and then left, leaving the door slightly open. Kurt stepped closer and opened the door for a second to watch Blaine leave. He looked back one more time when he reached the stairs and seemed like he wanted to say something, so Kurt did the first thing that came into his mind: he shut and locked the door, then pressed his back to the wall and slid down onto the ground beside the door, burying his face into his palms. He was such a horrible person. He was probably the worst human being of the whole world. How could he do such a thing, he had no idea.

But Blaine was gone… He would move on, he would forget about him with time and they would never see each other again. He would never figure out what exactly had happened that night between them. He would find a nice guy who appreciated him and get what he truly needed. And Kurt… He would get what he wanted, too. What was the most important for him in that moment.

He took a deep breath and looked down at his stomach. There was that feeling again, the one that told him that there was a little life growing inside of him, too little to feel it but still there. Okay, it was stupid. There was nothing in there, not yet. If he was right about the pregnancy at all. Maybe the doctor was right. Maybe he wouldn't get pregnant so easily, so the previous night didn't even matter. He worried about nothing. Yes, that was it. He shouldn't worry. He should just wait. Two weeks. Maybe a little less. There were so many tests on the market, he had to find the most sensitive one. He knew himself enough to know that he wouldn't be able to wait longer than necessary. He could barely stop thinking about the baby now, what would happen in the next weeks? It would be torture for sure, but it wasn't like he could do anything until then. He had to be patient. Right. And hopeful. Who knew, maybe he was the lucky type. Maybe that night with Blaine was enough to become pregnant. The doctors didn't know everything either.

~ o ~

Although it was still too early to say anything for sure, Kurt knew that he was pregnant. That feeling became stronger with every day and he just knew it. He didn't even need a test to be sure. It didn't mean he couldn't do a… few, every single morning. It wasn't crazy. He just had to make sure, so he could go to the doctor in time. He was 30 after all. And a male carrier. He had to be careful, it was completely normal.

To make sure he didn't go crazy, he worked harder than before and when he had some free time, he spent it at home, reading books about babies and pregnancies. Even if things with Blaine hadn't worked, he had to learn a lot about parenthood and it was better to learn them now when he had time for it. It would be useful later.

To make sure he didn't spend his remaining time until the big pregnancy test days locked up in his apartment, secretly planning how his child's room would look like, he met his friends more often than usually. He accepted all of their offers, especially when it was about just him and the girls. They made him forget about the baby for a while and time seemed to pass faster that way. He still had to tell them sooner or later. He would be pregnant, either this way or another and his friends had to know about it. Well, not the part where he had told Blaine to forget about the condom. That was something he wouldn't tell anyone. His biggest secret, the one he would keep until his dying day.

"I'm pregnant" he whispered to himself as he waited for Rachel and Mercedes to arrive that morning at their favourite coffee shop. "No. I… You know that I haven't been with anyone for a while and… No."

"Are you talking to yourself?"

Kurt looked up with wide eyes to find Mercedes standing beside him, watching him in interest.

"Hey" Kurt said quickly. "I just… I'm practicing… for-for a rehearsal."

"Rehearsal?" It was Rachel this time as she quickly made her way to them. "Does it mean what I think it means?"

"I thought you didn't want to try Broadway again after the Tony incident" Mercedes said , frowning.

"I know! And I don't. It-it's just a small theater. And it's not like I would leave my job, it's just a small role. You know, a hobby. Because I have so much time for new hobbies right now…"

"Are you alright?" Rachel asked.

"Sure" Kurt said. "I just really need that coffee right now."

"Oh, somebody had a long night" Mercedes smirked.

"What are you talking about?" Kurt asked.

"We know everything" Mercedes said.

"You do?" Kurt asked in surprise.

"Oh, this is about that guy" Rachel said suddenly and smiled at Mercedes. "You were right."

"What are you talking about?" Kurt asked again. He was so confused.

"Oh, come on. The guy from your birthday party" Rachel explained.

"We saw you two leave" Mercedes said.

"And you didn't come back" Rachel nodded in agreement.

"And you've been so weird since then" Mercedes said and leaned closer to him. "Come on. Details."

"Blaine?" Kurt laughed awkwardly. "Oh, no, you're wrong. There's nothing between me and him."

"But you left with him" Rachel said.

"And you were out of touch for a whole day" Mercedes said.

Kurt knew that he turned scarlet but he couldn't do anything against it. There was a reason why he wanted to keep his biggest secret for himself. Because he couldn't keep secrets at all. So if he pretended that it hadn't happened at all, maybe the others wouldn't find out the truth.

"No way" Rachel gasped suddenly.

"What?" Kurt asked.

"You… You had sex with a complete stranger?" Rachel asked as she leaned closer, to his luck. Kurt didn't need any embarrassing moments.

"You?" Mercedes asked in disbelief.

"Yes, me" Kurt sighed in frustration. "What's so strange in that? I'm an adult man. If I want to have sex with a complete stranger, then that's what I do. Because I can."

He stood up and went to the counter to get himself a coffee.

"I thought you broke up with Jason because he wanted sex on your second date" Mercedes said as she joined him again.

"Well, yeah..."

"And I remember as you said that you would never do such thing" Rachel said.

"Because of the diseases" Mercedes nodded.

"And because it's not romantic" Rachel continued.

"Maybe I don't need romance anymore" Kurt said as he grabbed his paper cup and turned back to them. "Maybe I want something else."

"Like?" Rachel asked.

Kurt opened his mouth to say something but then a couple walked into the shop and went to the counter, passing them. The woman had a huge baby bump and Kurt couldn't take his eyes off of it. It was such a beautiful sight. There was a baby growing in there, a vulnerable little life and it was just so...

"Oh, thank God. I thought she wanted to drink coffee" Rachel said as the woman took the glass of orange juice from the bartender.

"What's wrong with coffee?" Kurt asked.

"You don't know?" Rachel asked. "Caffeine isn't good for babies. It's practically forbidden during pregnancy."

Kurt looked down at his own stomach in horror. He had forgotten about that. He knew he had read it somewhere but still… How could he be so stupid? He was about to have a baby on his own, he was probably already pregnant and he had poisoned his baby with coffee. He quickly pushed his cup away.

"Are you alright?" Mercedes asked.

"Yeah. I just… I-I shouldn't drink this" he said.

"Why not?" Rachel asked.

"Uhm… High blood pressure" Kurt said the first things that came into his mind.

"You have high blood pressure?" Mercedes asked.

"Not yet but I could have" Kurt said quickly. "The doctor said that I should be more careful."

He was turning scarlet again. He had to get out of here...

"I really enjoyed this little conversation with you, ladies, but I have to go" he said as he hastily stood up. "I have to go to work."

"But I thought…"

"I'll call you."

Kurt walked out of the coffee shop before any of the women could say anything. Not like they could. Kurt was long gone by the time Mercedes found her voice.

"What's wrong with him?" she asked.

"I have no idea" Rachel sighed. "He's so weird."

"Believe me, it's about that guy" Mercedes said.

"I guess so" Rachel nodded in agreement. "He's never been like this before."

"Maybe he found the right one this time" Mercedes said hopefully.

"I hope so" Rachel nodded.

~ o ~

Kurt decided to go home before work and get one of his baby books. He needed something to read in his lunch break and he had a lot of time left. He didn't want to arrive too early. He was almost home when he passed a drug store on the other side of the street. He stopped immediately. He was running out of pregnancy tests, a quick visit surely wouldn't hurt… And he needed prenatal vitamins. God knew how much damage he had caused his child with the coffees he had had in the previous weeks. He had to do something about it. His baby needed the best. Because he was pregnant. Maybe he should do a test before going to work, it was surely time to get a result…

He walked into the store and quickly got what he needed. He carefully avoided the owner's gaze, knowing very well what she must have been thinking about him after visiting her shop at least twice a week and buying every type of pregnancy tests possible. But he wasn't insane. Not at all.

He went back to his place and did the usual process. Now he only had to wait for the result, three or four minutes. It would be negative again. He could feel it. He should have waited a few more days before trying again. Testing every single morning was pointless. He had no idea why he did it.

He took his vitamins and grabbed a book from his bedroom before going back to the bathroom, drinking the rest of his water. He wasn't even excited this time. He had been the first few days but after seeing so many negative tests, it didn't seem like fun anymore. He would just drop this stick into the trash can like the others and then go to work…

Kurt almost dropped the glass he held in his hand as he looked at the stick. It was mostly the same. It was white like before, there was that pink line that showed that the test worked properly and… And there was another one.

Kurt jumped away from the test as if he was afraid of it and quickly put his glass down. He took a deep breath and stepped forward again, carefully, as if something horrible could happen to him in any second. He didn't know why he was so scared. It was just a pregnancy test after all.

"A positive pregnancy test" he muttered.

A positive pregnancy test. A positive pregnancy test. It meant that...

"I'm pregnant" he said with wide eyes.

And then he collapsed. He couldn't decide if it was still the fear or the sudden wave of happiness that took its place so quickly, but one thing was sure, he couldn't stand on his feet any longer. He had to sit down for a while and repeat it in his head, again and again. He was pregnant. Pregnant. Pregnant. Pregnant. Seriously? Kurt reached for the stick and checked the result again. Yes, it was sure. It was just a faint line but it was enough to know what he had felt for weeks.

He jumped up and cried out happily. He hadn't believed that it could happen, not so quickly, not to him, but it worked. He was pregnant and he would become father of a beautiful child within months. He would have the family he wanted so much.

In that moment, Kurt Hummel was the happiest person of the world.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter. Enjoy!**

 **If you are familiar with the Something Unexpected 'verse, you know how much I loved Sebastian as Kurt's doctor. So much that I did it again.:) I hope you will like him in this role.**

Kurt was in heaven. Nothing could ruin his perfect mood, not the horrible weather, not the rude people on the streets, not even his stressful job. He didn't care about those small things anymore because they didn't matter. He was pregnant, he was going to be parent soon and that was all that mattered.

Focusing on anything else was so hard. He couldn't stop thinking about his baby for a second. He imagined what it would be like to hold his baby in his arms, how his child would look like, how amazing his life would be once his baby arrived. It would be so perfect. Kurt couldn't wait to get over with the pregnancy and finally have his baby.

Okay, maybe he freaked out a little when he had the positive pregnancy test in his hand. It happened so quickly, even if he had thought that he was prepared for everything, he was surprised that it was so simple. The doctor had told him that it would be difficult to get pregnant but here he was, having dozens of positive pregnancy tests to prove that there was a little life growing inside of him. He was worried at first that he wouldn't be good enough for the baby. He was single after all, so even if he had everything else, he couldn't give the baby another father, something that was very important. He remembered how much he had missed his mother after her death, how lonely he had felt. He was worried that his baby would feel the same way. But then he convinced himself that he would love that baby with all of his heart and it would be alright. It had to be because there was no way back from here, not that Kurt wanted to change anything. He didn't regret his decision. He wanted this baby more than anything in his life and he would never give up on his child.

Now he only had to visit the doctor. He considered going back to that clinic because the other option seemed scary. He could go back and tell them that he was already pregnant and didn't have to go through all those tests, he only needed someone to check on him and his baby. He decided that it wouldn't be the best in the end. There would be too many questions he didn't want to answer and if he had to tell someone, it had to be someone he knew. So he had no other option: he had to visit the only doctor he knew and trusted to keep his secret.

Sebastian was a good friend of Kurt but the man had never thought about him as someone who helped him give birth. Sebastian was great when it was about clubbing and talking about how horrible men could be, but letting him know about his biggest secret… Kurt had no other option, though. He had to make sure his baby was fine and that meant visiting a doctor. He would try to come up with a good explanation but he had to be prepared in case Sebastian figured out what he had done. He would understand for sure. Okay, maybe he would be pissed at first but he was Kurt's friend after all. He had to be on his side in this.

Kurt looked around in the waiting room as he waited to be called. There were so many people around. Men and women, happy couples sitting around him, smiling and chatting happily. He sighed heavily as he watched them. He wished he could have someone to share his happiness with. He wanted this, too. It made him wonder if things would have been the same for him if he had waited a little longer. Maybe if he had given Blaine a chance…

He shook his head. No. He had tried it so many times, he had wasted precious years to find the man he needed and he had failed over and over again. He couldn't waste more time. He was already 30 and he wouldn't be any younger. He needed this baby right now, even if he had to raise his child on his own. So many people did it every single day and they managed on their own. They would be fine, too. Okay, it would be hard at first but he would learn how to be a single father. He could do it. He was ready.

"Kurt Hummel?"

Kurt knew that everybody was looking at him. Carriers were rare, most people didn't even know about them and today proved that everybody thought it was strange. He decided not to worry about those looks, though. He didn't let anything ruin his happiness, especially not some strangers who knew nothing about him.

He was led into a small room and told to wait there after giving blood for the tests. More tests. Great. When he thought that it would be just a quick ultrasound and he could be on his way again...

"Kurt?"

Sebastian was surprised, Kurt could tell from one look. No wonder, he had offered Kurt so many times to check on him but Kurt had never accepted it. He had told Sebastian that it would be strange. He didn't want his friend know such things about him but it was about his baby now, he was willing to go through a few awkward examinations of it meant keeping his baby safe.

"Hey" Kurt greeted him. "How was your trip? Did you enjoy it?"

"Paris is still the same" Sebastian said in a bored tone. "What are you doing here? I thought you didn't want me to know about your strange condition."

Kurt rolled his eyes. He had kept it secret so long but after a drunken night, he had told Sebastian everything. His friend had made fun of him, he had kept talking about it in the worst moments, right until Kurt had had a long talk with him about how uncomfortable it made him feel and that Sebastian should stop treating him like this if he was his friend. So they never talked about it, choosing to act like Kurt was just like every other man.

"I need your help" he said.

"STD?" Sebastian asked immediately. "Kurt, we talked about this so many times…"

"Thank you, dad, but I'm a big boy" Kurt said, rolling his eyes. "It's… something else. I'm pregnant."

Sebastian blinked in surprise. He had been gone for a few weeks and still, he had missed a lot. The last time he had seen Kurt, he hadn't even had a boyfriend.

"How did it happen?" he asked.

Kurt was ready with the answer. He didn't want Sebastian to know more than necessary, so he decided to go with the story his friend would accept better than the truth.

"I visited a fertility clinic while you were gone" Kurt said.

"And you are already pregnant?" Sebastian asked in disbelief.

"Well, yeah" Kurt shrugged. "I guess I was lucky. They had a free appointment the day after I called them. Things happened so fast and it looks like the first time was successful. I have dozens of positive tests, I have to be pregnant. But I think you should check on me, just to make sure the baby is fine."

"Why don't you go back to the clinic? Your doctor there knows everything about you, I'm sure he would be…"

"No" Kurt said quickly. "I mean… I thought about it. I don't want to discuss these things with a complete stranger when my dear friend can do it for me, too."

"Dear friend" Sebastian said slowly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure" Kurt said.

"How exactly did they do it?" Sebastian asked.

"The insemination?" Kurt asked, blushing.

"Yes" Sebastian smiled. "I'm interested in such things, you know."

"Of course" Kurt muttered.

"So…"

"So they just… You know. They stuck that thing into me and I got the sperms of the guy I chose" Kurt said, remembering what he had read about the process.

"It was so simple" Sebastian said.

"Well, you know how these things work…"

"I do" Sebastian said. "So let's start it again. How did you get pregnant? Because we both know that you're lying."

Kurt hated this so much. He wished he could lie easily like most people but he just wasn't that type. He couldn't fool Sebastian, especially not when his friend was watching him like this.

"Fine" he sighed in the end. "It happened the regular way."

"You mean..."

"Another guy fucked me and two weeks later, I had a positive pregnancy test in my hand" Kurt said. He knew that his face was burning and Sebastian enjoyed seeing him like this. He knew how uncomfortable Kurt felt in that moment.

"Another guy, huh? Does that guy have a name?" Sebastian asked.

"Yes" Kurt said through gritted teeth. "But it's not something I'll discuss with you."

"Why not? We are friends. You have to tell me the details" Sebastian said.

"No way" Kurt said.

"Why not? You always tell me everything. Unless…"

Kurt hated the satisfied grin that spread out on Sebastian's face.

"No. Fucking. Way" he said.

"What?" Kurt asked. Now he knew that it was a bad idea to come here. Sebastian would never leave him alone after this.

"You hooked up with him" Sebastian stated.

"It's not what you think…"

"And now you're pregnant with his baby. Does he know that he's going to be daddy soon?" Sebastian asked.

"Of course not!" Kurt said quickly. "Look, you don't know a thing…"

"Oh, I do" Sebastian said. "Do you have any idea how many desperate teenage girls visit me every single day? It's not as uncommon as you think. Just look at yourself. I thought you knew how to use protection."

"Because I do" Kurt said.

"Still, here you are, begging for me to tell you that you aren't pregnant…"

"I never said that" Kurt snorted. "I'm pregnant. I know I am. I just want to make sure the baby is fine."

Sebastian fell silent for a minute. That was weird. Kurt could never say anything that left his friend speechless.

"You aren't together with the guy."

"No."

"But you want to keep the baby."

"Yes."

"You are crazy."

"Why?" Kurt asked. "I'm an adult man. I have a great job, a huge apartment, I'm perfectly capable of taking care of a child on my own. I don't need another man. Just the baby."

"You say that as if you did it on purpose" Sebastian said.

Kurt turned his head away. That was exactly what he wanted to keep from his friend. And everybody else. Something only he had to know about.

"No. Way" Sebastian said.

"I want a baby, okay?" Kurt said in frustration. "I visited a fertility clinic after my birthday and talked to a doctor about the progress. It would have taken months if not more for me to get pregnant. I couldn't wait so long."

"So you found an idiot who was willing to knock you up?" Sebastian asked. "Do you have any idea how risky it can be? What if he wants the baby?"

"That won't be a problem because he doesn't even know about it" Kurt said.

"Wait. What?" Sebastian asked.

Kurt took a deep breath and rubbed his tired eyes. This conversation was a lot longer than it was supposed to be and he still didn't know if his baby was fine.

"The guy doesn't know about… my condition" Kurt said. "And I won't tell him. It was just one night, I won't see him ever again. So he won't find out that he has a child. Can we focus on my baby now?"

"I can't believe you used him like that, especially after you broke up with that guy… What was his name? Jason? Because he wanted sex on your second date. You said that you would never let anyone so close until…"

"Times change" Kurt shrugged. "I'm 30 and I want to have a child. That's my number one priority right now and I don't care what you think about me. Now I want to see my child."

"Okay. Fine" Sebastian said. "Lie down and relax. Let's see what we have in there."

Kurt looked at the screen, waiting for his baby to appear there. But time just passed and Sebastian didn't make any move to start the ultrasound. Kurt turned to him, huffing on annoyance.

"Yes, Sebastian?"

"I'm just trying to imagine how you lured that guy into your bed and fu…"

"Shut up and do your job" Kurt said.

"Yes, my dear" Sebastian said, unable to stop smiling. This day had been so boring before Kurt arrived but his friend made up for all those idiots he had seen that morning.

~ o ~

After his awkward encounter with Sebastian, Kurt needed a coffee. Not just needed it, he felt like he was ready to kill for it. He had talked to himself about this so many times, he had told himself that caffeine was wrong and harmful at his baby but he couldn't say no for a cup of that tasty liquid. He loved its smell, that it made him feel so warm inside, that it reminded him on his best days with his family and friends. Kurt knew that it was just the work of the hormones. He was talking about coffee after all, not some expensive wine or something. Still, he couldn't live without his coffees. He tried not to have more than one every day and always chose the caffeine-free version because the last thing he wanted was to hurt his child in any way. He couldn't believe he was willing to pay for that. He drank coffee because of the caffeine, he had never cared about the taste before. Okay, he had cared but not much. It had been more important that he got his usual caffeine-dose before work. Now he only drank coffee because of that amazing smell…

Kurt shook his head as he stepped into the first coffee shop on his way home, fighting off the urge to lean down to the couple sitting at the window and inhale the scent of their drinks. He was pregnant but not crazy. Okay, maybe if he was quick… No. He had to act like a normal person and what he wanted to do was definitely not normal. He would just get his drink and took a seat to enjoy his own drink.

He was lucky because he didn't have to wait too long to get his coffee. He practically tore the paper cup out of the barista's hand and looked around, searching for a free table. Now that he had what he needed, he could think of something else than just that coffee. Like the photos of his baby hidden in his bag. He had asked for several pictures after the ultrasound, he had begged Sebastian to do as many of them as possible, so he had enough proof that his baby was fine. It looked like he had a healthy pregnancy. Everything was like it was supposed to be, so now he could calm down and just enjoy the sight. There was only one problem, he couldn't find a free table. Kurt was about to leave and find a bench or something in the area where he could just stare at those pictures until he got bored of it when something caught his attention. There was someone waving their hands to let him know that Kurt could join them. Kurt smiled and took a step towards the person but then he stopped, almost dropping his drink. Because it was someone he definitely didn't want to see right now.

"Blaine!" he said in surprise. "Blaine… Uhm… Hi, Blaine."

"Hey, Kurt" Blaine smiled. "I see you still remember my name."

Kurt wanted to disappear. That was what he had to do. He had to get out of here as soon as possible. He had to avoid Blaine because of he spent too much time with him, there was a chance that he would tell him about the baby. That was a bad idea. Blaine surely wouldn't be that nice to him anymore if he knew about the baby. Or what Kurt had done to him. No, he had to come up with a good excuse and get out of here before it was too late.

"Do you want to join me?" Blaine asked.

No. I can't...

"Sure" Kurt smiled and sat down before he could stop himself. Those damn hormones… He wasn't himself anymore.

"It's good to see you again" Blaine said.

"Yeah. You too" Kurt said. "So what are you doing here?"

It was a stupid question. He should have asked anything but this. But again, it was too late to stop himself.

"I have a break" Blaine said.

"Oh, right. Because you work right up there" Kurt muttered, looking at the building across the street. He had been there with Sam so many times. He should have known that he could bump into Blaine if he came here. But he needed his coffee so badly.

"That's right" Blaine nodded. "How are you doing?"

I'm pregnant. With your child. Please, don't hate me.

"Fine" Kurt said. "I'm fine. Really. Just fine."

"I see" Blaine smiled.

He was so adorable. Kurt wanted to lean over the table and kiss him. He liked the way Blaine kissed him and his scent was so sweet. Maybe one more time… No. No. That was bad, probably the worst idea he had ever had.

"And what about you?" Kurt asked quickly.

"Just the usual" Blaine shrugged.

"Oh, right. Those sexy models… How often do you date them?" Kurt asked suddenly. Why he asked such things, he had no idea. But he remembered that Blaine worked with models and he couldn't stop the sudden wave of jealousy that took control over his mouth.

"I don't date models" Blaine laughed. "Is that jealousy I hear in your voice?"

"What? No. Of course not" Kurt laughed awkwardly. "I'm not jealous. Why would I be?"

"Right. Because there's nothing between us" Blaine nodded.

"Right" Kurt nodded. "Uhm… Let's say one of those models invites you over for a drink after work. Would you say yes?"

"You are jealous" Blaine stated.

"No. I'm not. Just curious" Kurt said, although he felt like he wanted to chain Blaine to himself to make sure he didn't date anybody else. He knew it was insane, he didn't want anything from him, but thinking about Blaine being with one of those models… No. He couldn't let that happen. "So you wouldn't say yes, right?"

"I already told you. I'm not interested in models" Blaine said. "Although…"

"Yes?" Kurt asked with wide eyes.

"If you asked me if I wanted to drink something with you, I would say yes without hesitation" Blaine said honestly.

He had to say no. He had to tell Blaine that he wasn't interested. That was the right thing to do if he didn't want him to get involved any more than he already was. Blaine couldn't find out that he was pregnant with his child. No, Kurt couldn't let that happen. Blaine would hate him. He would probably tell him to get rid of the baby. He couldn't let that happen. He had to stand up and tell Blaine that he didn't want to see him ever again. That was the right thing to do.

"We could have a coffee together" Kurt said instead. What the hell was wrong with him? That wasn't what he wanted to do!

"That sounds nice" Blaine said. "Tomorrow?"

Say no. Say no now that you have a choice...

"Okay" Kurt said. "Same time?"

"Sure" Blaine smiled. "I can't wait to see you again."

Kurt wished he could punch himself or something as he walked out of the coffee shop. He was going to have a coffee date with the father of his baby. The man who didn't know a thing about his pregnancy. The man he wanted to avoid so badly. How could he be so stupid? He should have said no. He wanted to say no. Why did he agree to meet Blaine again then? Maybe because Blaine was so hot and he couldn't resist him?

"Stupid hormones" he muttered.

He had to call off the date. Yes, he would just call Blaine later and tell him that he couldn't come. Or better, he wouldn't show up and wouldn't even call him. Blaine would never talk to him for sure if he did that. But it was such a horrible thing to do and Blaine didn't deserve it. He was such a nice guy, Kurt didn't want to hurt him.

He had no idea what to do. Whatever he did, he would hurt Blaine. He had to find out which way was the less painful. Because Blaine deserved that much.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I finally found some time to update this story. Have a wonderful weekend and enjoy the new chapter!**

Kurt found himself sitting on his living room's floor the next day, unable to decide what to do. If he listened to his hormones, he found the coffee date with Blaine the most perfect idea he had ever had. Blaine was cute and hot and he wanted to see him even after Kurt had been such a jerk. It surely meant that he had to see him again. But his rational self knew that he would admit everything sooner or later, if not on this date but when things turned more serious between them and Blaine would… he had no idea how Blaine would react. He would hate Kurt, he would tell him horrible things – things he deserved, that was clear – and he would probably tell Kurt to stay away from him for the rest of his life. Kurt just couldn't let that happen. He liked Blaine, a lot, and he so regretted his decision that night. If he had known…

He sighed and put a hand on his stomach. That wasn't exactly true. He didn't regret having a child. Although there was no sign that proved that the baby was there, unless he counted the photos he had about his baby, he already felt the positive energy that came with parenthood. He felt so peaceful, so happy. It was better than anything else he had experienced before and he knew that it was going to be better once he was able to feel his child.

He still didn't know what to do with Blaine, though. Should he meet him? Or was it better to just stay away from him? What was the best for him?

"I can't meet him again" he told himself. "I just can't. I have to end this before I do something stupid."

He wished things had happened differently. That he had met Blaine before that night, that he had had a chance to get to know him. Than they could be together now and prepare themselves for the arrival of the baby. He could have a whole family like he had always wanted. But it was the best for everyone if he didn't go near Blaine again. This relationship wouldn't end well. He had to tell Blaine about the baby sooner or later and than he would tell him the truth as well. Blaine would hate him… No. He couldn't do that to him.

"But a coffee…" he muttered. "Just a coffee. As friends. Yeah, we are just friends. Friends have coffee together, right?"

Just one more time. He had to meet Blaine to say goodbye. That was the right thing to do.

~ o ~

Kurt didn't meet Blaine in the end. He went to the coffee shop but Blaine wasn't there. He could have called him, he had Blaine's phone number after all but he decided not to. He considered it as a sign that he shouldn't see him again. Yeah, it was the sign that he was stupid and he had to let Blaine go. That was it. He quickly left the coffee shop before Blaine showed up and decided to get rid of the piece of paper Blaine had given him that morning weeks earlier.

After going back home, Kurt sat down onto the couch with the piece of paper in his hand. He didn't need it. He just had to let go of it. Just a small movement, it really wasn't that hard, right? Kurt sighed as he watched the numbers. He didn't want to get rid of the only memory he had from Blaine. Who knew, maybe he would need it later. Maybe he would change his mind and he would call the man one day. To tell him that he had a child, for example. Or to ask him out. Blaine was so nice, he really liked him and wanted to see him again.

Kurt was about to call Blaine when he reminded himself how stupid it was and quickly pushed the piece of paper into his pocket. He couldn't listen to his heart, not in such a serious thing. He had to be rational and remind himself how badly it would end. Because he was pretty sure that Blaine wouldn't be so nice to him anymore if he figured out what Kurt had done.

To make himself forget about the man for a while, Kurt took the baby's photos into his hands. He loved watching the baby, or at least as much as he could see of his child. It wasn't even baby-like, it was to early for that but a few more weeks and he would see a real human being on the pictures.

"I can't wait to hold you in my arms" Kurt said as he looked down at his stomach. "I know you are there. Can you hear me? I hope you can. I'm your father and I'll make you so happy, sweetie."

"Who are you talking to?"

Kurt almost fell from the couch as he looked up and saw his step-brother standing at the door.

"Finn! What are you doing here?" he asked with wide eyes.

"I'm hungry" Finn shrugged.

"It still doesn't answer my question" Kurt said.

"I thought I would find something in your fridge and didn't have to cook" Finn explained.

"You decided to come over and eat my food because you are too lazy to cook yourself?" Kurt asked slowly.

"Rachel doesn't like it when I eat meat but I'm getting bored of vegetables" Finn said.

"You are unbelievable" Kurt shook his head. "Uhm… I have some pizza in the fridge."

"Pizza?" Finn asked in surprise. "You never eat such things."

Only when he was pregnant.

"I couldn't resist it" Kurt said.

Finn stepped closer and looked down at Kurt's stomach. Kurt just realized that he still rested a hand on his none-existing baby bump, so he quickly pulled back his hand and sat up straight. Unfortunately, he forgot to hide the photos and when Finn stepped closer, his eyes landed on them.

"Is that a baby?" Finn asked. "Wait… Who is pregnant?"

"Just… A friend of mine" Kurt said quickly.

"Rachel?" Finn asked. "Oh, my God. Are we…"

"No. It's not Rachel's" Kurt rolled his eyes.

"Mercedes?"

"No."

"Santana?"

"It's mine" Kurt said in frustration. He didn't know why but the thought that Finn believed it was somebody else's baby made him so angry. It was his baby, only his.

It took Finn longer than usual to understand Kurt's words. He kept looking at his step-brother for a very long time, opening and closing his mouth, unable to say anything.

"But… You're not a woman, right?" Finn asked in the end.

Kurt rolled his eyes. Finn knew him better than anyone else. Okay, not like his father but he still knew a lot.

"I'm a carrier" Kurt said.

"I know. You told me" Finn said.

"Than what's so surprising? I can get pregnant and now I am" Kurt said.

"I thought it meant you had a second job" Finn muttered.

Kurt opened his mouth but nothing came out. Finn was so… Finn.

"It means that I'm having a baby" Kurt said.

"Congratulations, Kurt!" Finn said happily. "And who is the other father? Wait, there is another father, right? Or does it work like in regular cases just..."

"No, Finn. A woman can't impregnate me" Kurt said, rubbing his forehead. This conversation was giving him a headache.

"So who is the lucky guy?" Finn asked.

Kurt considered telling Finn the truth. He trusted his step-brother, he believed that Finn would keep his secret. But he remembered that there was another person knowing abut it already and if he kept telling people the truth, his secret would be out sooner or later. Not to mention how disappointed Finn would be. It was better to simply tell him something he would believe.

"There's no other father, Finn" Kurt said. "I went to a fertility clinic and they helped me get pregnant."

"Oh" Finn said. "You want to raise it alone? Are you sure that's what you want?"

"Yes, Finn. I know it'll be hard but I want this baby. I don't want to wait for a possible relationship. I'm 30 and I won't be any younger. I have to have a baby now or I won't have one at all" Kurt said.

"Does Burt know?" Finn asked.

"No" Kurt said. "And I would be glad if you could keep my secret, at least until I make sure the baby is healthy. It's still too early to say that."

"But your dad…"

"I'll talk to my dad" Kurt said. "Please, just let me deal with this. I promise, I'll tell everyone in the right moment."

"Okay" Finn nodded. "Just don't wait for too long, okay? I hate secrets."

"I know" Kurt smiled. He wanted to tell the whole world that he was expecting but first he had to make sure the baby was fine. Once the first trimester was over, he would tell everyone, starting with his father. He knew for sure that it would be a long and hard conversation but his dad would accept his choice sooner or later. Especially if he didn't know the whole truth.

~ o ~

Saturday came quickly but Kurt couldn't be as excited as before. He wasn't in the mood to meet his friends, especially since he couldn't have a real coffee or a drink anymore, not to mention that he was so tired… He didn't want to leave the bed at all. So he stayed in there and read the rest of the baby books he had.

Around lunch, he realized that he had to leave the bed eventually. He was hungry and he had nothing to eat. Okay, he had a few things in the fridge but nothing he wanted. He needed something… he had no idea what he wanted. Something healthy because the baby needed the best. He had bought a lot of vegetables and fruits the other day but he didn't want to make a salad, he was too lazy for that. Fruits were great but he had had them for breakfast and the baby needed other food, too. So he had to get out of the bed and find out what he would like for lunch. Something light, like a soup or something. He didn't feel too well. He hoped that he wouldn't be sick because he had to stay healthy for the baby. Maybe a salad wouldn't be a bad idea after all. He had eaten so much fast food in the previous days, he needed vitamins to correct that mistake.

Kurt grabbed the first clothes from the wardrobe he could get, not really paying attention because he was too tired to think about fashion in that moment, grabbed his wallet, his keys, and in the end, his books. He was done with all of his baby books but he knew that they had some more in the library. He could go there and get himself something else to read. He had to learn so much about parenthood and now he had enough time to prepare himself for the arrival of his baby. Later he would be too busy for that. He had to buy a lot of things for his baby, all the things he had on his list and who knew what else. He had to get everything in time, so he would be ready for the baby before he became too huge to move.

Speaking of getting bigger, he certainly had to pay attention to what he ate. His baby preferred fast food but it was certainly not good for his shape. He had stopped training after the first positive test because he was worried about the baby but at least he had to eat healthily because he would gain too much weight if he wasn't careful. He didn't want to start his time with the baby with a diet.

He walked into the nearest restaurant and tried to convince himself that a soup would be the best choice for lunch. Apparently, his baby had other ideas. When he saw the pasta the man sitting at the other table was eating, he knew that he wouldn't be able to stomach anything but that thing. He needed pasta. In that second. Damn, he was so hungry…

Luckily, he got his food quickly and he made it disappear just as fast. About half an hour later, he left the restaurant, full and satisfied. So much for being careful… He decided to take a walk before going to the library. After such a huge lunch, he had to move a little. He would spend the rest of the day in bed anyway, he couldn't be that lazy, not if he wanted to keep himself to his plan. It wasn't a huge distance after all.

Those twenty minutes seemed like forever. He could barely move when he finally reached the library and couldn't wait to find a chair to sit down. He walked up to the second floor, got himself two new baby books and sat down quickly. Maybe he could stay here for a little while, make sure these books were good enough for him and rest. Yeah, he definitely needed some rest. Damn, it was just the first trimester, how would be go through the whole pregnancy if he felt so tired after such a short walk? He was getting older...

"Hi."

Kurt looked up and almost dropped the book he held in his hand when his eyes landed on a familiar face. A very familiar one he didn't expect to see in here.

"Blaine" he muttered, trying to hide the book he had in his hand. "You… what are you doing here?"

"You seem surprised to see me" Blaine smiled.

"Well, I didn't expect to meet you here" Kurt said.

"Why? I don't look like someone who likes reading?" Blaine asked.

"No" Kurt said before thinking about his words. "I-I mean… Sorry. I didn't mean like that."

"It's okay" Blaine said. "I didn't expect to see someone like you here either."

He was still smiling as he said that but Kurt couldn't not feel hurt. Did it mean that Blaine considered him stupid? Because he wasn't. He read a lot in his free time, he certainly wasn't that type who spend the whole weekend in front of the TV, watching stupid TV shows. Was it what Blaine thought about him?

"Hey, it was just a joke" Blaine said quickly when he saw that Kurt was close to tears. "I didn't mean to… God, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay" Kurt said quietly.

"You are right, by the way" Blaine continued. "People don't think much about people like us. I have no idea why. Just look at yourself, you seem like a clever guy."

"Thank you" Kurt said. "And I'm sorry for what I said. I just…"

"I'm just a photographer. I know" Blaine nodded.

"A clever one" Kurt smiled.

"That's right" Blaine said. "So tell me, Kurt, what kind of books do you read?"

Kurt glanced at the book in front of him, knowing that Blaine did the same. How could he explain this? Without telling Blaine the truth, of course.

"Anatomy!" he said quickly.

"Excuse me?" Blaine frowned.

"I want to know more about anatomy. Children, mostly. That's why I read these books" Kurt said.

Blaine looked at the book one more time.

"But this is about parenthood" Blaine said.

"Is it?" Kurt asked, acting like he was surprised. "Oh, yes. You are right. I must have picked up the wrong book."

"Oh, don't worry, I do it all the time" Blaine laughed.

Then they fell silent again. Kurt kept his eyes on the table, trying to figure out what to do. There was that feeling again, that he wanted to be with Blaine but a small voice in his head told him what a stupid idea it would be. He had to...

"Would you like a coffee?" Blaine asked suddenly.

"Uhm… what?" Kurt asked.

"Last time I was late and you didn't wait for me" Blaine said.

"Oh, the coffee shop" Kurt muttered.

"That's right" Blaine said. "I want to make sure you don't run away again."

Kurt felt awful. Poor Blaine must have hurried to get to him and he didn't even give him a chance. Blaine deserved something in return. Just a coffee, it surely wouldn't hurt. And it would make him feel a little better because in that moment, he felt like he could burst into tears in any second. Blaine must have seen it because he took a careful step back, probably knowing that Kurt didn't understand his joke. Again.

"Sure. Why not?" Kurt said in the end.

"Seriously?" Blaine asked in surprise.

"Of course. I need a break anyway" Kurt said.

Blaine seemingly liked the answer. He seemed so excited, it made Kurt feel so much better. He took Blaine's hand and – baby books forgotten – he walked downstairs to have a coffee with him.

It was so easy to get lost in a conversation with Blaine. He was such a funny guy, a little shy but Kurt didn't mind. He was really adorable. Kurt wanted to pull him into his arms so badly.

"What would you like?" Blaine asked suddenly, pulling Kurt out of his thoughts.

"Uhm…" Kurt opened his mouth to tell Blaine his usual coffee order but then he reminded himself that he was pregnant and he shouldn't drink coffee at all. "You know what? I think I'll just take a glass of orange juice."

"Are you sure? I thought you wanted a coffee" Blaine said.

Yes, he wanted one so badly. But he couldn't. He was an adult who could place his own needs behind his baby. Because it was the most important.

"Perfectly" Kurt said.

They got their drinks and sat down to an empty table. Kurt looked at his own drink, feeling sick out of sudden. He thought that he liked orange juice but it looked like it wasn't that kind of a day. Just the thought of the disgusting cold drink made him sick. But that wonderful smell coming from Blaine's cup...

"What are you doing?" Blaine asked as Kurt leaned down to inhale his coffee's delicious scent.

Kurt sat up immediately, fighting off the urge to punch himself. Okay, the pregnancy hormones made him crazy but he had to stop himself before doing such things. Blaine surely thought that something wasn't right with him.

"I'm sorry. I just… I really love the smell of coffee, you know?" he said.

"Oh, I get it" Blaine smiled. "You remind me on my best friend's sister. When she was pregnant, she couldn't resist the smell of coffee. She was always around us when we had a coffee. She said that it smelled better than anything."

"I'm not pregnant" Kurt said quickly.

"Of course not" Blaine said slowly. "I just thought…"

"But I'm not" Kurt said.

"Okay" Blaine nodded.

He knew. Kurt could see it in his eyes. Damn, Blaine knew everything, he must have figured out when he had seen his books. Damn, he was a telepath or something and he was surely reading his thoughts in that moment.

"It was nice to see you, Blaine" Kurt said as he stood up before they could reach the awkward part. He definitely wasn't ready for that. "I-I have to go."

"But…"

"I'll call you."

"Will you?" Blaine asked hopefully as Kurt turned to leave.

Kurt hesitated for a second. What could he say? He couldn't stay away from this guy and it looked like fate wanted him to meet Blaine again. But there was his secret, the one Blaine could never find out. But Blaine already knew, right? Wait, why did he look so confused? Maybe he wasn't a telepath after all.

Kurt simply turned away and left. He felt the sudden need to talk to himself or worse, to tell Blaine everything. It was better to stay silent and leave before he could do something embarrassing. He certainly wasn't ready for that.

"Wait…. What…" Blaine stood up and reached for Kurt but the man was already halfway out of the room.

Blaine sighed heavily and sat back down, running his fingers through his hair. Kurt left, again. Sooner than the other time, he barely even had time to talk to him. He didn't get it. Okay, he wasn't the most popular type but it seemed like there was some connection forming between them. He certainly had to talk about this with his friends because he didn't understand anything and he didn't have enough experience on his own to decide what to do. His heart told him that he needed this guy because Kurt was special, not like any other guys he had met before. But his mind… He wasn't sure. Sometimes it felt like Kurt wanted him, too, sometimes like he was running from him. He had to figure out how to discuss it with Kurt without hurting him. He certainly didn't want to screw up this time.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it. Please, leave a review and let me know what you think.**

 **I'm glad you liked the previous chapter. I'll be honest, I really enjoy writing this story. It makes me smile every time I work on it.**

Blaine had to wait until the next Friday night to meet his friends because they were too busy that week. He was so nervous. He was afraid that he would meet Kurt until then again and he would do something that scared the man away for once and for all. So when Friday came and he met Jeff and Wes in their usual club, he sighed in relief. Here he was, with the best people possible to help him. They would surely find out what Blaine did wrong and what he had to do to make Kurt give him a chance. Things had become so awkward between them, Kurt gave him less and less time, not to mention that he had practically run away from him the last time. Yeah, something was definitely wrong with Blaine. He just had to find out what scared every single man away from him.

"It has to be your hair" Jeff said helpfully. "You look like a broccoli most of the time."

"He seemed to like my hair the first time" Blaine said.

"He was drunk, right?" Wes asked.

"Yes?" Blaine said uncertainly.

"Then that's the solution! Get him drunk again and the man is yours" Jeff said easily.

"I don't think it's a good idea" Blaine said. He didn't want Kurt to only like him because he was drunk. He wanted a real relationship this time.

"Then we are back to stage one. Do something with your hair" Jeff said.

"Are you sure it's because of my hair? Because it's like… I don't know. As if I say something wrong" Blaine said, trying to remember what had made Kurt run the previous time.

"What were you talking about?" Jeff asked.

"Uhm…" Blaine tried to remember their conversation in the library. "Coffee, I think."

"Coffee?" Jeff asked. "That's your problem, my friend."

"What? Why?" Blaine frowned.

"Don't get me wrong, Blaine, but you are so…"

"Boring" Wes helped them out.

"I'm boring" Blaine said slowly.

"You are. Just look at yourself. It's Friday night and you don't even drink" Jeff said.

"I never drink" Blaine said. "Not anymore. You know what happened last time when I was drunk. I almost married a girl."

"That was funny" Jeff smiled. "Why don't you tell Kurt about that? I'm sure he won't find you boring anymore."

"I won't tell anyone about that" Blaine said. That had been the most horrible night of his life and he had been lucky to come to his senses in time. That was when he had decided to avoid two things: alcohol and Vegas, that had almost ruined his whole life.

"Then do something he likes" Wes said. "You said that he liked fashion."

"Yes. He works for Vogue" Blaine said.

"Then take him to a fashion show" Wes said.

"You think he would like it?" Blaine asked.

"He will love it" Wes said. "Come on. Call him immediately."

Blaine blushed. He had talked to Kurt several times but he still didn't know his number. Another huge mistake. Maybe Kurt didn't want to date him because he thought he wasn't important enough for Blaine.

"I don't have his phone number" Blaine admitted.

"You don't?" Jeff asked.

"I was nervous, okay? I gave him my number and I thought…"

"You have to get it" Jeff said. "Is there a way to reach him? You surely know someone who knows him."

"Sam!" Blaine cried out suddenly. "Sam knows him."

"The hot blond model Sam?" Jeff asked.

"He's still straight" Blaine reminded him.

"Such a shame" Jeff sighed.

"I have to talk to Sam" Blaine said. "He could ask Kurt to come to our next shooting. Then Kurt won't know that it's because of me and he won't freak out before I have a chance to talk to him. And-and he'll love it because he loves fashion."

Blaine convinced himself quickly that it was the perfect way to meet Kurt again. He was so excited that he didn't even notice how his friends looked at him.

"He'll screw up again" Wes whispered.

"I know" Jeff sighed. "He's hopeless."

They wished Blaine could find someone who appreciated him but it was so hard. Blaine knew nothing about men and unless a miracle happened, this Kurt guy wouldn't fall for him either. They had seen it so many times. Blaine was just… Blaine. He had to do something fast if he didn't want to lose his chance again.

~ o ~

"Look who is here!"

"My favorite pregnant guy!"

"Why didn't you tell us?"

Kurt's eyes find Finn immediately who looked at everyone but him.

"You told them" Kurt stated.

"Only Rachel" Finn said. "I really didn't mean to but she knew that I was hiding something and she forced me to tell her everything."

"I only told Mercedes" Rachel said.

"And I told Santana" Mercedes said.

"So now everybody knows" Kurt sighed.

"Practically yes" Santana shrugged. "I'm sorry but this is a huge thing. Okay, I'm not sorry. My colleagues loved it!"

"Wait, you told your colleagues?" Kurt asked with wide eyes.

"My gay friend is pregnant. This is the story of the century!" Santana said.

"I can't believe you did this to me" Kurt shook his head.

"How did it happen?" Mercedes asked.

"Oh, let me guess" Santana said. "You got drunk on your birthday and when you let that guy fuck…"

"You told her everything?" Kurt asked as he turned to the others.

"Maybe we did?" Rachel asked uncertainly.

"Don't worry, I didn't tell anyone about that" Santana said. "Okay, I might have told Brittany but you can trust her."

Kurt took a deep breath, fighting off the urge to punch something. Or yell. Or cry. He wasn't sure which one would happen.

"First of all, there's nothing between me and that guy" he said. "And you are wrong. It wasn't an accident. I wanted and planned this baby."

"Wait, what?" Rachel asked. "But I thought…"

"I didn't want to wait any longer. I'm 30 and I won't be any younger. I want to become father" Kurt explained.

"So what? You visited a fertility clinic and just let them… You know…" Santana said.

"Yes" Kurt lied. It was a lot easier with every time he did. He almost believed it himself.

"That's so…"

"Wonderful" Rachel said quickly before Santana could say anything that would hurt Kurt for sure. "We are so happy for you!"

"Thank you" Kurt said gladly. "Would you like to see the baby?"

"Of course!" Mercedes said excitedly.

Kurt grabbed the pictures of the baby from the coffee table. He didn't even hide them anymore, he watched them all the time and liked having them close. He sat down with his friends in the living room and talked about his baby for a very long time. He knew everything. He knew what size his baby was in that moment, what would happen to it in the next weeks, everything. He had read every single book about pregnancies he could find after all.

"It doesn't even look like a baby" Santana commented.

"Because it's still too small" Kurt said, unable not to defend his child.

"I think it's beautiful" Rachel said. "I can't believe you're going to be father soon!"

"Me neither" Kurt laughed.

"What does it feel like?" Mercedes asked.

"I don't have symptoms" Kurt said. "I mean… I'm tired sometimes but I work a lot, so…"

"So you haven't puked on anyone so far?" Santana asked.

"No" Kurt glared at her.

"Such a shame" Santana sighed.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" Rachel asked with a more serious tone this time.

"What do you mean?" Kurt asked back.

"Kurt, most people aren't really into single parents" Rachel said carefully. "If you keep this baby now…"

"Stop right there, Rachel" Kurt said slowly. She couldn't honestly think that he would kill his child. Right? Right?

"I didn't mean to upset you, I just…"

"I want this baby" Kurt said, putting a protective hand on his stomach. "I don't care about men anymore. I don't need them."

"So you are done with men?" Santana asked. "But what about that guy on your birthday…"

Kurt's anger disappeared in a blink and worry took over its place. Blaine. He had been so rude to him the last time. Now he knew how stupid he had been in the library but it was too late. Back then he had thought that Blaine knew his secret and he had freaked out. Later he had thought about it and admitted how stupid it was of him. Of course Blaine didn't know anything. It was just a coincidence that he had talked about babies. A very awkward coincidence and now he surely thought that Kurt was crazy and he wouldn't try to talk to him ever again. Kurt knew that it was the best, it was what he wanted after all, but why did he feel so bad then?

"Kurt? Are you listening?" Rachel asked, waving her hand in front of him.

"I'm sorry" Kurt said. "Did you say something?"

"Oh, he likes him" Mercedes smiled.

"Who?" Kurt frowned.

"I think they are talking about that guy" Finn said helpfully.

"Blaine?" Kurt asked. "There's nothing between us…"

"Of course not" Santana snorted. "I know this look, Hummel. And I think you should tell him about the baby as soon as possible."

"Why should I? It's not like he has anything to do with it. Not at all" Kurt said quickly.

Too quickly. It wouldn't have been a problem if Santana hadn't been there. But she was and she didn't miss the little signs. She never did. Kurt could see it in her eyes, although she remained silent, something Kurt was so glad for.

But it was still there. He trusted Sebastian with his secret but he couldn't be sure if he could trust Santana as well. She was just Santana after all. She loved scandals and didn't really care about others. Damn, he should have been more careful...

"If you like the guy, I think he should know about the baby" Rachel said.

"I agree" Mercedes said. "He would find out sooner or later. You should get over with it as soon as possible."

Kurt looked at Santana. She was still watching him in silence, probably because she was still in shock. Was it possible? Santana Lopez who always shared her opinion, whether her friends needed it or not, was deadly silent. Kurt decided to just let it go for now. He didn't need anything else to worry about, his baby and his other father were way too much.

~ o ~

"I can't believe we are here."

Kurt looked at Sebastian with a raised eyebrow. The man had never been so excited before. Kurt didn't even know why he was acting like this. It was just a fashion show, not even a big one. They were only here because Sam had offered Kurt two tickets and the man hadn't known which one of his friends he should take to the event. He chose Sebastian in the end, probably because he had mentioned the fashion show a few days earlier when he had visited Sebastian to check on the baby and the man had convinced him that he was the right person, especially since he kept Kurt's secret so well. So Kurt didn't have a choice, he had to take Sebastian with him.

"I didn't know you were interested in fashion" Kurt said.

"I'm not" Sebastian said. "But look at those models! It's like a gay paradise."

"Just don't give yourself. Please" Kurt said. He knew his friend way too well and he didn't want to get kicked out because Sebastian couldn't keep it in his pants.

"Oh, that guy looks delicious" Sebastian said, licking his lips.

Kurt shook his head as turned around to see what caught Sebastian's attention.

"Sebastian, that's Sam" Kurt said slowly.

"And?"

"And he's straight" Kurt explained.

"It doesn't bother me if it doesn't bother him" Sebastian shrugged.

Kurt was about to tell him that he changed his mind and Sebastian should wait for him outside until he said hi to Sam but Sebastian seemed to move on to another man.

"Oh, look at that ass" Sebastian sighed happily. "Even in those jeans it looks perfect."

Kurt turned to look at Sebastian's newest target but he forgot what he wanted to say when his eyes landed on the man. He couldn't see his face, he was talking to a model, but he seemed so familiar for some reason. Okay, those tight jeans seemed familiar, Kurt must have seen them before. But where?

Suddenly, the man turned his head and Kurt finally knew. It was so familiar because he had seen it before, without those clothes covering it, from very, very close.

"Now that would be a perfect fuck" Sebastian said.

He couldn't risk getting caught. He had to get out of here. Kurt quickly grabbed Sebastian's arm and started to drag him towards the exit.

"What are you doing?" Sebastian asked.

"We have to get out of here" Kurt said.

"Why?" Sebastian frowned.

"Because that guy..."

"With the sexy ass?" Sebastian asked.

"That's Blaine" Kurt said simply.

"Blaine, the sperm?" Sebastian asked in surprise.

"Shh!" Kurt hissed, looking around in concern. How could Sebastian be so loud?

Sebastian stopped immediately and looked back at the man.

"Hm, good choice, Hummel" he said. "A very good one. If I could get pregnant, I would definitely ask him to make me a baby."

"Could you just shut up? You are loud" Kurt said.

"I always am" Sebastian said, seemingly not too concerned.

"He doesn't know about the baby!" Kurt said.

"Oh" Sebastian said. "Then you have a lot to explain."

"What?" Kurt asked in confusion.

"He's coming" Sebastian smiled.

Kurt turned around so fast that he lost his balance and would have tripped over his own feet if Blaine hadn't been there to catch him.

"Oh, hi" Blaine smiled, holding Kurt steadily until he got back to his feet.

"Hi, Blaine" Kurt said. "I didn't expect you to be here."

"Another unlikely place for me, right?" Blaine said.

"You work for the agency" Kurt said, suddenly remembering why Blaine was here. Of course he was, he should have thought about this earlier.

"Are you a model, too?" Sebastian asked as he stepped forward. "Sebastian Smythe. Pleasure to meet you."

Kurt almost punched him. He knew this look. Sebastian was flirting with Blaine, Blaine, the father of his baby. He knew that Sebastian didn't care about others but hey, it was Blaine this time. He should have thought about Kurt's feelings.

"Are you a friend of Kurt?" Sebastian asked.

"Well, we…"

"Sebastian, I thought you have to go" Kurt said, giving his friend a pointed look, hoping that Sebastian understood.

"But we've just arrived..."

"And you have an important examination to do" Kurt said.

"Are you a doctor?" Blaine asked.

"I'm an Ob-Gyn" Sebastian said.

"That sounds interesting" Blaine said.

Kurt couldn't believe his ears. Blaine was interested in Sebastian? Seriously? No, he couldn't let that happen. Blaine wasn't supposed to have any conversation with hot, young males, especially not Sebastian who couldn't appreciate a wonderful man like Blaine. He had to do something, fast.

"I'm so happy to see you again" he said and grabbed Blaine's hand. "I'm sorry for leaving you so quickly the last time. I just… I forgot something important and our conversation made me remember."

"I waited for your call but it never came" Blaine said, seemingly trying to hide how hurt he was but he failed. Kurt felt so horrible. He didn't want to hurt Blaine at all.

"I wanted to call you, I just… I lost your phone number" he said.

"You could have asked Sam" Blaine pointed out.

"Right" Kurt muttered. "I can be so stupid sometimes. I forgot that you knew Sam."

"Well, now you know" Blaine smiled. "I'm so glad you are here. I can't stop thinking about you."

Kurt felt like he was going to cry. Blaine thought about him, a lot. Blaine cared about him and wanted to see him, even after being so rude to him. Blaine was so sweet.

He opened his mouth to say something but then an unexpected smell hit his nose. It was so strong and awful, Kurt felt like he was suffocating.

"Are you alright?" Blaine asked in concern.

"Yeah. I just…"

He was going to be sick. Damn, he had to get out of here, fast. And find a bathroom. Where were the bathrooms? He didn't remember.

"Kurt…"

Kurt slapped a hand over his mouth and ran out of the room before he could puke on Blaine and ruin his chance with him for once and for all. Blaine didn't know what was going on, though, he kept looking after the man, fearing that he scared Kurt away again.

"What's wrong with me?" he muttered.

"You? Nothing" Sebastian said as he put an arm around Blaine. "You seem like a nice guy."

"But Kurt…"

"You like him?" Sebastian asked.

"Of course I do" Blaine said. "But every time I try to talk to him, he just… He leaves. Does he hate me?"

"Oh, not at all" Sebastian said. "Believe me, he can't shut up about you actually."

"But then why…"

"So I'm a doctor" Sebastian said hastily, desperate to change topic before Blaine had a chance to realize that Kurt was sick and ask stupid questions.

"Yeah, you already mentioned that" Blaine said, his eyes still searching for Kurt.

"That's all? You are weird. Most people want to know everything about my job" Sebastian said, acting as if he was hurt.

"I'm sorry" Blaine said. "So you work with women, right?"

"Mostly" Sebastian shrugged.

"Mostly?" Blaine asked back.

"You know, there are men who can get pregnant, too" Sebastian said.

"Oh, yes, I read about that somewhere" Blaine nodded. "It's interesting. I mean, it has to be rare, right? I don't know anybody with that gene."

"You certainly do" Sebastian smirked.

"Excuse me?" Blaine frowned.

"So you are a photographer, right?" Sebastian asked suddenly. "How can you resist those naked models?"

"I don't do such things" Blaine said.

"Don't tell me you never thought about it" Sebastian whispered into his ear.

"I…" Blaine had no idea what to say. Kurt's friend was even weirder than the man he liked if it was possible.

~ o ~

Kurt missed most of the show, thanks to that horrible smell. Once he had reached the bathroom, he emptied his stomach several times and he was too scared to leave after that, believing that it could happen again. Just when he thought he would be lucky and he didn't have to be afraid of morning sickness… It wasn't even morning sickness. It wasn't morning after all. His baby should have known that it wasn't the right time to be sick when they were way after lunch, closer to dinner actually. His baby must have missed that lesson. He had to be careful with this from now on. Morning sickness certainly wasn't a morning thing for him.

By the time he found Sebastian, the show was over. His friend was waiting for him outside, luckily alone. And he seemed way too happy for some reason.

"Morning sickness is a great thing" he sighed happily. "It means that your hormones work properly and you have the best chances to give birth to a healthy baby."

Kurt groaned and leaned against the wall beside him.

"You don't seem too happy" Sebastian pointed out.

"I didn't plan to meet my lunch again after I ate it" Kurt said.

"Oh, you are upset because you missed the show. You should be. It was a great one" Sebastian said.

"Thank you so much" Kurt said slowly. Now he remembered why he never called Sebastian after his breakups. His friend certainly didn't know when he should shut up.

"Don't be sad. Look at this" Sebastian said as he pressed a piece of paper into Kurt's hand.

"What is it?" Kurt asked as he looked at the numbers. They seemed familiar for some reason.

"Blaine Anderson's phone number" Sebastian said.

"I won't call him" Kurt sighed.

"Why?" Sebastian frowned.

"Because I can't meet him again. Remember?" Kurt said.

"O-oh."

"What is it?" Kurt asked as he slowly turned to Sebastian.

"Remember that you have to stay calm for the baby's sake."

"What have you done?" Kurt asked.

"I gave Blaine your phone number" Sebastian said quickly.

"You did what?"

"You seem to like him" Sebastian reasoned.

"Because I do!" Kurt said.

"Then what's wrong? I helped you find a way to each other. You should be grateful" Sebastian said.

"Because he doesn't know about the baby! I can't meet him again and I certainly can't date him! He would find out that I'm pregnant and he would ask about the baby. I would tell him everything and he would hate me!"

"This is better than that Turkish soap opera you showed me last week" Sebastian said.

"Sebastian!"

"Okay, okay, I get it" Sebastian said. "But honestly, you would miss your chance with this guy when you don't even know what he thinks about babies? He might fall in love with you. You two might stay together and raise the baby together. But you won't find out if you don't give him a chance."

"You think I should?" Kurt asked uncertainly.

"Definitely!" Sebastian said.

"Maybe you are right" Kurt said in the end. "I really like him and I would love to see him again."

"Then call him" Sebastian said.

"I think I will" Kurt nodded.

"Oh, and tell me what he said about the baby. If it doesn't work with you, I want to ask him out" Sebastian said.

"You mean you want to fuck him?" Kurt asked with a raised eyebrow.

"It's the same" Sebastian waved his hand.

"Don't go near my baby's father ever again" Kurt said, pushing the piece of paper into his pocket, making sure it was out of Sebastian's sight. He had to keep Blaine away from Sebastian. And everybody else. Yes, he wanted to keep Blaine safe from people like Sebastian who only wanted to use him and the best way was to call Blaine and ask him out for a date. Yes, he would do it. Only to keep him safe, of course. Not because he couldn't stand seeing Blaine with other men. Not. At. All.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **I don't know how often I will be able to update in November. I'm going to attend three conferences within four weeks, one of them abroad, and I also have to write the papers for the conference books. I have a few pre-written chapters stored on my computer, though, I will update them when I can. Hopefully, it will be easier in December, at least around the holidays.**

Kurt checked his reflection in the mirror again. Something wasn't right. He couldn't exactly tell what it was but he didn't like what he saw. His hair was like always, perfectly styled, maybe a little shinier and stronger than before. Yes, it was definitely different. And better. He loved what pregnancy hormones did to his hair and skin, he had never felt so beautiful before. But something still wasn't right…

"Wow, you look fancy today."

Kurt jumped as Finn walked into his room, acting like he was home. Like always. Kurt didn't even know that he was here.

"Finn, you scared me" Kurt said, pressing a hand to his chest.

"Oh, sorry. Rachel made salad for lunch again and I'm hungry" Finn said.

"And you came over because…"

"Because you eat a lot of meat now that you are pregnant" Finn said. "Is there something left in the fridge?"

Kurt rubbed his forehead. He loved his stepbrother but Finn should learn that he couldn't just walk into somebody else's home like this, without letting the other know. Kurt was going to have a baby soon and there might be situations when he didn't want to see his stepbrother or anybody else.

"You can eat the chicken" he said in the end.

"Thanks, bro" Finn smiled and turned to leave.

Kurt sighed and turned back to the mirror. He didn't have much time until his date with Blaine. Date… A real one. He couldn't believe he had said yes but when Blaine had called him, he had been so sweet and Kurt couldn't resist him. After his talk with Sebastian, he saw things differently. He bumped into Blaine all the time, maybe it was a sign that he should give him a chance. Okay, he didn't really believe in that but he knew that Sebastian found Blaine hot and he had to keep his friend away from the father of his baby. Blaine was such a great guy and Sebastian… Well, he wasn't. He wanted to save Blaine from a possible heartbreak.

And there was that other thing… He was careful with his emotions because the pregnancy made him crazy, but when it was about Blaine, his heart started to beat faster, he felt warm and just… Perfect. Blaine made him feel that way. Blaine moved him like nobody else before. Kurt was afraid that it was all because of the hormones and it wasn't real. Blaine was the father of his baby after all, he surely only felt like that because his baby had the genes of Blaine. He still had to find out if it was real or just his stupid mind playing with him, that was why he wanted to Blaine so badly. And impress him. He wanted to look hot and he wanted Blaine to like the sight. Okay, maybe it was stupid but Blaine was nothing like any other man. He was just… Blaine. Hot and funny and sweet Blaine who had the sexiest ass Kurt had ever seen, who read a lot and listened to every kind of music and...

"Hey, Kurt."

Kurt frowned as he watched Sam pass his bedroom. Okay, he was crazy sometimes but he didn't remember having Sam around at all. What the hell was he doing here?

"Sam? What are you doing here?" he asked.

"Hey, Sam" Finn said as he walked back into the living room with a plate in his hand. "Kurt made chicken. Do you want some?"

"No, thanks" Sam said. "Mercedes is waiting for me at home. I just stopped by to get a few condoms."

"What?" Kurt asked.

"Well, Mercedes said that you have tons of them and it's not like you need them anyway…" Sam shrugged.

Kurt sighed heavily. He loved his friends but they spent an awfully lot time in his home, not to mention their weird requests. Maybe he should change the lock or get his keys back from them.

"Here you are" Kurt said as he pushed a small box into Sam's hand. "Have fun. Now if you excuse me…"

"Are you going somewhere?" Finn asked.

"I have a date" Kurt said.

"And you're going in those?" Finn asked, nodding towards Kurt.

Kurt looked down at his clothes. So he was right, there was something wrong with his look. Maybe the others could tell what it was.

"Okay. What's wrong with my clothes?" Kurt asked.

"I don't know" Finn said uncertainly.

"Oh, I do" Sam said helpfully. "Your pants. They are too…"

"Too what?" Kurt asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"Don't answer" Finn said but it was already too late.

"Too tight" Sam said at the same time. "It looks like you have a little…"

"What?" Kurt asked desperately.

"Don't worry, it's just the baby" Finn said. "See? Your baby bump is growing and you can't hide it in these clothes."

"Not that you should" Sam said quickly. "It's… cute."

"A little weird but it's not like it's going to be smaller" Finn shrugged.

"God. I'm fat" Kurt said with wide eyes.

"It's just the baby…"

"I'm eight weeks pregnant, Finn" Kurt said. "The baby is like… this small."

"Oh" Finn said. "Okay. Then you're fat."

Kurt was pretty sure that he would cry. Here he was, ready for his first real date with the guy he liked so much and he had to call it off. That was his only choice, he couldn't meet Blaine when he was so fat. Blaine would hate him. God, he knew he shouldn't have eaten all those cheesecakes the other day but they had been so delicious and he couldn't stop eating...

"You won't cry, right?" Finn asked carefully.

"I finally have a real date and I screwed up before I met the guy" Kurt cried.

"It's not that bad…"

"Oh, come on. You two never notice anything. If you can tell that I'm fat, Blaine will see it, too" Kurt said.

Finn and Sam looked at each other. None of them knew what to do with a crying pregnant man. They didn't even know how to handle their own crying girlfriends. This one was a lot worse.

"You could… hide it somehow" Finn said.

"Yeah, that's it! You know a lot about fashion. Just find something else that hides your stomach" Sam said.

"I have to look great" Kurt said desperately, unable to stop crying. "I can't go there in my sweatpants."

"We never said that" Sam said.

"But that's all I want to wear" Kurt continued. "Do you have any idea how uncomfortable jeans can be? I just hate them! They are too tight, I can't even breath properly."

"Then go in your sweatpants?" Finn offered.

He regretted it immediately as Kurt glared at him.

"Aren't you listening? I have a date!"

Just when the two men were sure that Kurt's mood couldn't get any worse, Santana walked through the door. They all turned to look at her in confusion.

"What are you doing here?" Finn asked.

"Hey! You didn't say we would meet here" Santana said.

"Because none of you is supposed to be here and ruin my life" Kurt cried.

Santana raised an eyebrow. She had no idea what was going on but something must have happened if Kurt was crying so hard.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Why do you ask? You don't care" Kurt said.

"I'm curious" Santana shrugged. "So what's going on?"

"I'm fat" Kurt cried. "I finally have a date with the perfect guy and I have to call it off because I'm too fat."

"You're just pregnant" Santana said.

"But he doesn't know!"

"Just tell him" Santana said. "Then he won't break up with you because of your weight."

"Don't you think he'll freak out?" Kurt asked in a small voice.

"He will" Santana said. "I don't say he won't break up with you. Only that it has nothing to do with your weight."

Now Kurt was crying so hard that he could barely breath. Finn and Sam watched him in concern before turning to Santana.

"Why did you say that?" Finn asked.

"Because it's true" Santana replied. "Come on. Would you date a girl you barely know if she tells you that she's pregnant?"

"You should have lied to him" Sam said. "You know, to make him feel better."

"Why would I do that?" Santana asked.

"Because he's your friend!" Finn hissed.

"Please, don't cry" Sam said as he turned to Kurt again. "It's not the end of the world."

"It is" Kurt cried.

Finn turned back to Santana.

"See? You made him cry."

"No. You made him cry" Santana pointed out. "He was already upset when I arrived."

She walked to the bathroom's door and disappeared inside. The others thought that she would get tissues for Kurt but she came back with a bottle and a few candles.

"I have to go. I only came for your massage oil. The one Brittany loves so much. I hope you don't mind" she said. "By, guys!"

"Hey!" Sam said as he grabbed her arm to stop her. "Where are you going?"

"Home?" Santana offered.

"You can't leave right now" Finn said.

"Why not?" Santana frowned.

"Because you did this to him, so you have to fix it" Sam explained. "Come on. You have to help us."

"And how exactly should I do that?" Santana asked.

"Apologize, for example" Finn said.

"Would it help?" Santana asked.

"It surely wouldn't hurt" Finn said. "He's already late, he's upset and it's not good for the baby. We have to do something."

Santana sighed and turned back to Kurt who was still crying uncontrollably on the couch. She had a bad feeling that it wouldn't be that easy.

~ o ~

Blaine started to get worried. Everything had started so well. He had had Kurt's phone number and he had gathered his courage to call him the other day. Kurt had been so normal, something that rarely happened since they knew each other. They had had a great time talking to each other and then they had agreed to have a real date. They were supposed to have dinner together but Kurt was nowhere to be seen. Blaine checked the time on his phone again. Yes. Kurt was definitely late. Maybe not just late, maybe he wouldn't come at all. It wasn't like Kurt didn't do strange things like leaving him in the worst moments. It was what always happened to them after all. Blaine started to worry that his friends were right, Kurt was simply insane and Blaine should be happy that he didn't want anything from him.

Blaine sighed heavily as he leaned against the wall. Although Kurt was certainly insane, he started to like the guy. There was something in Kurt that made him unable to stop thinking about him. Blaine couldn't explain the feeling but it was certainly a pleasant one. He wanted to get to know Kurt better. There was only one problem, Kurt didn't seem like he wanted the same. Blaine tried to figure out why Kurt pushed him away over and over again. Okay, he wasn't really good looking, he was somewhat boring and made stupid comments when he was nervous, but he wasn't a bad guy. He really didn't want that much, only a man who accepted him like this, someone he could make happy. But it look like Kurt wasn't that man. It was late, Kurt hadn't called him and he would surely not come. Blaine should just give up and move on. Maybe next time he would be lucky. As if it was so easy to move on when Kurt made him feel like nobody else before...

"Blaine!"

All of his concerns disappeared the moment he spotted Kurt hurrying towards him. And he was smiling… It was the most beautiful sight Blaine had ever seen.

"Hey" Kurt said as he stopped beside him, taking deep breath to calm his rapidly beating heart. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to be late, really, I just…"

"Something came up" Blaine said. "I know. It happens to you all the time."

Blaine didn't mean to be rude, not at all. It was just a statement. Kurt still seemed to be hurt and Blaine regretted his comment in a blink.

"But you're here and that's all that matters" Blaine said quickly. "Are you hungry?"

"You have no idea" Kurt said.

"That's great" Blaine said. "What do you want to eat?"

"Do you have something in your mind?" Kurt asked.

"Well, there's a nice Chinese restaurant at the end of the street…"

Kurt grimaced. Just the mention of Chinese food made him sick. He could practically feel the horrible taste of soy sauce in his mouth and he wanted to throw up so badly.

"Oh, you don't like Chinese food" Blaine said when he saw Kurt's expression. "I'm sorry. I didn't know…"

"I like it. I just don't want to eat anything… Spicy" Kurt said in the end. He couldn't explain things better.

"Okay" Blaine smiled. "Then I know that little place right there. They make amazing salads…"

Kurt did that again. Blaine started to get desperate. How could he take Kurt to a date when the man didn't like any of his ideas? Little did Blaine know that Kurt felt nauseous since he had left his apartment, probably because he had been crying for so long. The fact that he had to run not to be late from his date just made everything worse. As Kurt imagined a bowl full of vegetables, he was pretty sure that he would throw up right there.

"You don't like salads" Blaine sighed. "Why don't you decide what you would like to eat?"

"I'm not sure I should…"

"Come on, Kurt. I don't mind, really. I only want to be with you" Blaine said.

That was so sweet. Kurt couldn't stop smiling at Blaine. He didn't understand how Blaine could be so nice to him, even when Kurt acted like a lunatic most of the time. He just wanted to hug Blaine and never let go of him. It didn't feel right, though, even in his hormone-driven state he knew that it wouldn't be appropriate. He had to be normal because he was pretty sure that if he kept acting like a crazy preggo, Blaine would realize that it was definitely not what he wanted and run off to the other direction.

"Sandwich" Kurt said quietly.

"What?" Blaine frowned.

"I want to eat a sandwich" Kurt said, knowing how stupid it sounded. But when Blaine said that they could have anything he wanted, he knew exactly what he – or his baby – wanted in that moment.

"You want a sandwich" Blaine said slowly.

"Not just a simple sandwich" Kurt explained. "Whole wheat baguette, grilled chicken, tomato, cheddar cheese and mayo."

Blaine seemed more and more surprised with every passed second.

"Oh, come on. You said that I could choose and I want that thing in this moment" Kurt said. "Come with me and let me introduce you to the best sandwich of the city."

"I'm in" Blaine said without hesitation. Kurt was holding his hands and he was so close. There was no way he could say no to his man.

"Very good" Kurt smiled.

It was so easy to feel good with Blaine. Probably because Kurt didn't fight his feelings this time, just let himself have fun. Blaine was certainly a good companion. He was such a happy guy, he seemed to find the bright side of everything. He talked a lot but was never boring and he was just… perfect. Yeah, Blaine was perfect for him.

There was that bad feeling again. Guilt. Kurt knew that he should have told Blaine about the baby – their baby – but he tried to forget about it. It was his first date in a long while and probably the only one when he enjoyed his time with another man. He wouldn't ruin this moment. Who knew, maybe it was his only real date. Blaine would hate him no matter what and once he had a baby, no one would be interested in him anymore. He didn't have much time to enjoy dating and he was determined to get to know this kind of emotions before he had to say goodbye to them. Just a few more days. He would tell Blaine everything but first he had to know what it was like when he fell in love with someone.

O-oh. Blaine was watching him and he was so silent. That wasn't a good sign.

"I'm sorry. I must have zoomed out a bit" Kurt said. It was awkward. He had to pay attention if he didn't want to screw up again.

"It's okay. I'm just watching you" Blaine said.

"Oh" Kurt said in surprise.

"You aren't like any other man I know" Blaine said, taking Kurt's hand.

"You mean I'm weird?" Kurt offered.

"No. I mean, yes, you are, but I like it" Blaine said. "I'm talking about how you make me feel."

Kurt leaned closer.

"How?" he asked.

"Amazing" Blaine laughed. "It's so easy with you. Okay, it's not when you run away, but when you are here…"

He hesitated for a moment before he pressed his forehead to Kurt's.

"It's perfect" he said.

Kurt closed his eyes. He was pretty sure that Blaine would kiss him but it never happened. Blaine pulled back after a while and cleared his throat. Kurt watched him in confusion. Was there something wrong? Oh, no, nothing could go wrong because he was in a very fragile state, still ready to cry in any second and he didn't want to ruin his date with such stupid things.

"I thought you were different" Blaine smiled. "I thought we would go to some fancy restaurant and pay a fortune for a salad because you didn't eat more to stay in shape…"

No. Blaine surely didn't mean that he was fat, right? Kurt had changed clothes. He had found a shirt that covered his huge, fat stomach. Blaine couldn't see it. Right?

"...And then you brought me here" Blaine said, seemingly not noticing anything.

"Is it a bad thing?" Kurt asked carefully. His eyes were already burning. Shit.

"Not at all" Blaine said. "Finally someone who eats real food. You have no idea how many times I…"

"You think I'm fat?" Kurt asked.

"No" Blaine frowned. "Why would I think that? Okay, maybe you were somewhat slimmer when we first met…"

"Oh, my God. I'm fat" Kurt said desperately.

That was it. He couldn't hold the tears back any longer, no matter how hard he tried. He tried to listen that little voice in his head that told him not to freak out because Blaine didn't say anything wrong but he couldn't help it. He had no control over his body or emotions since he was pregnant, he had no chance to stop it.

"No, you aren't" Blaine said quickly. "Seriously, you look great. Please, don't cry."

But Kurt couldn't stop. He could barely keep himself together after his conversation with his friends earlier that day, he couldn't get out of it, no matter how hard he tried. Blaine seemingly didn't know what to do. Everybody was watching them and he just wanted to get out of there. Too bad Kurt didn't seem like he wanted to move anytime soon.

"Hey, don't cry" Blaine said again as he pulled Kurt into his arms. "I think you look great."

"I'm fat" Kurt muttered.

"No, you aren't" Blaine said. "You are the most beautiful man of the world."

"Really?" Kurt asked suddenly. He felt a lot better in a second.

"Yeah" Blaine said, stroking Kurt's cheek. "I can't stop thinking about you since that night."

"Only because you think I'm crazy" Kurt said, looking away.

"I wouldn't say crazy, just…" Blaine fell silent for a moment. He had a feeling that he had to choose his words carefully if he didn't want to upset Kurt again. "Special."

Good job. Kurt was smiling. Blaine sighed in relief, maybe he wasn't that hopeless after all.

"You are so sweet" Kurt said.

"I'm trying" Blaine said. Really hard.

It was Blaine who ended their first official date that night. He was glad that Kurt could get over… Whatever had upset him but he didn't want to risk any other sudden event that could have ruined their date. So he decided to take Kurt home and end it here when everything was great and he had a chance for another date.

"I'll call you" Kurt said when they said goodbye.

"Will you?" Blaine asked with a raised eyebrow.

Kurt hesitated for a moment before he stepped away from him. Blaine sighed. He knew what it meant. They had fun but that was all. Kurt wouldn't call him ever again.

But Kurt didn't step through the open door. He turned around when Blaine didn't expect anything like that and threw his arms around him.

"Thank you" Kurt whispered.

"Oh… Yeah… I mean… Okay" Blaine stuttered. He wanted to punch himself so badly. Okay? That was all he could say?

"I'll call you" Kurt said. "For real this time."

He kissed Blaine's cheek and then slowly pulled away. Blaine didn't notice much of it, he felt like he was enchanted. He seriously felt like he was. He couldn't move, he couldn't talk, he couldn't do anything but watch Kurt step through the door and disappear from his sight.

Blaine had no idea how long he stayed there, just watching the door in front of him. Not that he cared. Because Kurt kissed him.

"He kissed me" he whispered.

Okay, it wasn't a real kiss but it was a lot more than what he usually got on his first dates. It was a promise. Kurt would call him, he would meet him again, they would talk and hold hands and kiss and everything possible.

"He kissed me" Blaine told himself again.

It didn't matter that Kurt was different. As long as the man didn't run away from him again and Blaine could find a solution for his weird outbursts, they would be fine. More than fine. Blaine had a feeling that he found the right man this time. And he couldn't wait to see Kurt again.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi Guys!**

 **I finally managed to find some time to upload this chapter. Enjoy!**

Kurt was sitting in his apartment, reading Vogue. Okay, he tried to read Vogue, but he couldn't. His thoughts always found their way back to Blaine. Being with Blaine felt magical. The man was so nice to him, even if he couldn't understand Kurt's weird behavior. It didn't matter. Blaine let him know that he still liked him and even when they weren't together, he made Kurt know how much he missed him. Blaine texted him several times every single day and they talked a lot when their jobs allowed that. It was new to Kurt but he certainly liked it. He couldn't stop smiling, he felt like he was the happiest person of the world and it was all because of Blaine. And the baby. Oh, no, there was that horrible feeling again. Kurt tried so hard not to think about his baby and Blaine at the same time but guilt found him no matter what. He still hadn't talked to Blaine about the baby. He knew he should have gotten over it long ago, before letting himself fall deeper and deeper in love with the man. But he couldn't help it. Every time he looked into those beautiful, innocent eyes, he knew that he couldn't do that to Blaine. He didn't want to hurt him. He also knew that it was a mistake because he had to tell Blaine eventually but he tried to convince himself that he still had time.

Well, not much more. Although he still had a few weeks before he started to show, it would happen soon. He wouldn't be able to hide his baby bump, not to mention the morning sickness that made his life hell. He could never be sure when he would be sick and he was running out of excuses. Last time when he had had a date with Blaine, they had bumped into a friend of Blaine, a man whose perfume made Kurt sick in a blink. Luckily, Blaine had bought his lie about food poisoning but if it happened again, Kurt would be in serious trouble.

There was no other choice, he had to talk to Blaine. He had to tell him the truth before their relationship became more serious, before he would hurt Blaine. Okay, it was too late for that, he would hurt Blaine no matter what but it was definitely easier to do it now when he wouldn't cause too much damage. Too bad Kurt wasn't ready for that.

He heard as someone unlocked the front door and he sighed heavily. It had to be Finn again. His stepbrother spent an awfully lot time in his home lately, since he knew that he was going to be uncle soon. He asked Kurt a lot about the baby and he never forgot to remind him on another important thing Kurt didn't want to face: he had to tell his dad about the baby.

It wasn't like his father wouldn't support him. Burt would surely love his grandchild, even if he knew the truth about the baby. But Kurt was still so scared to talk to him. He knew that his father wasn't ready to accept his strange condition, let alone the fact that his son was pregnant and would have a huge baby bump soon. Hell, he had needed years to accept that Kurt was gay. Kurt didn't need another awkward conversation, not right now. He just wanted to enjoy this time and get over the first trimester as soon as possible. It would be a lot easier then and he would be ready for all the trouble he had caused for himself. It could wait for a few more weeks… It wasn't like the baby would arrive anytime soon.

He was surprised when the door opened and Santana stepped inside. Kurt raised an eyebrow as he watched her walk around in his apartment as if she lived there. He seriously considered getting his keys back from his friends. They acted like they owned the place and it was getting annoying.

"What can I do for you, Santana?" he asked.

"Ah, you are here" Santana said as if she was surprised.

"Yeah. I live here, although you make it hard to believe" Kurt said. "So what are you doing in my apartment?"

"I brought back your massage oil" Santana said.

Kurt didn't believe her. She surely wouldn't waste her time for such things. Especially since she never brought back the things she borrowed from Kurt.

"So what are you doing here?" Kurt asked again.

"There's no one else here, right?" Santana asked.

"As you can see" Kurt sighed.

"Good" Santana nodded and walked to Kurt. She sat down beside him, looking at the man seriously. "We need to talk."

"I already told you. If you need advice to make your love life with Brittany better…"

"Not about that" Santana rolled her eyes. "Believe me. You are the last person I would ask for advice in that. I want to talk about you and that guy."

"Blaine?" Kurt asked.

"Yes" Santana nodded. "How are you two doing?"

"Why do you want to know?" Kurt asked carefully.

"He seems like a nice guy…"

"You don't even know him" Kurt pointed out.

"Okay" Santana gave up in the end. She took a deep breath, preparing herself for what would happen. She usually didn't mind if her friends were angry with her but she couldn't stand when they cried. She certainly didn't want to make Kurt cry again. "I think you should tell Blaine about the baby."

"Wh-why would I?" Kurt asked. His face turned scarlet in a blink.

"Because he has to know that you are pregnant with somebody else's baby" Santana said.

Oh. So Santana didn't know the truth. Well, not exactly. Kurt couldn't decide if it was good or not.

"I don't think I should tell him" Kurt said. "I mean… It's still fresh. We might break up and I don't want to tell him anything unnecessarily."

"Unnecessarily? Don't you think he should know that you are hysterical and throw up all the time because you are pregnant? Don't tell me he doesn't know that something is wrong. Everybody can see that something isn't right with you."

Why she had to be so rude, Kurt had no idea. But he felt like he was going to cry again and he probably would if Santana didn't leave him alone.

"It's none of your business" he said.

"Somebody has to be reasonable and it looks like you can't" Santana said. "Tell him. And the baby's father if he doesn't know yet. You have to tell them both."

"It's the same guy!" Kurt said before he could stop himself.

Santana was speechless. Finally. At least Kurt had some time to calm down. He really didn't want to cry again.

"You mean… that guy from your birthday party…"

"It's Blaine" Kurt sighed.

"So the baby's father…"

"Is Blaine" Kurt nodded. "The man I date. Yes."

"Why do you hate him so much?" Santana asked suddenly.

"Excuse me?"

"You didn't only steal his sperms, you mess with him as well" Santana said. "Do you have any idea how it'll make him feel?"

"I'll find out soon because I'll tell him" Kurt said.

"When?"

"Soon!"

"You have to tell him right now" Santana said.

"I don't want to" Kurt said. "Look, I know it's horrible but I like him. He's such a nice guy…"

"A nice guy who won't go near you again if you tell him the truth" Santana pointed out.

"I know. That's why I can't tell him now" Kurt said.

"It doesn't make any sense" Santana frowned.

Kurt sighed in frustration. Of course Santana didn't understand it. She was a lucky one who had found the love of her life soon and didn't have to experience one horrible date after the other like Kurt. She had no idea how amazing it was to have someone in his life after all those horrible years. She knew nothing.

"Look, I know what I'm doing" Kurt said, although his voice was shaking. He didn't believe himself either. "I'll find the best moment and tell him. I know what I have to do, you don't have to remind me."

"I just…"

"I don't need your help. Or your advice" Kurt said seriously. "I know what I'm doing and I'll deal with it alone."

He carefully avoided Santana's gaze because they both knew that it was a lie. Kurt knew very well that he had screwed up and it was too late to come out of this trouble without hurting Blaine. There was only one thing he could do: find the best moment and tell him everything. Then say goodbye. Only Kurt wasn't ready for that.

~ o ~

"How was your date with Blaine?" Sebastian asked the other day as he and Kurt went out to eat something since none of them wanted to cook dinner.

At least Kurt didn't want to cook because he was too tired. He had no idea if Sebastian could cook at all. He said that he could but Kurt had never seen him in the kitchen. So they went out to grab something healthy. Kurt tried to convince his baby that they had to eat healthily, that they couldn't live on fast food and desserts until the end of the pregnancy but it looked like that was all the baby wanted. One glance at the salads was enough to make him sick, so he chose to eat pasta again, desperately trying to get the image of a huge slice of cheesecake out of his head.

"It was fine" Kurt shrugged.

"Just fine?" Sebastian asked with a raised eyebrow.

"If you mean the last one…"

"Wait. You had more dates?" Sebastian asked. "That's great! I knew I was a great matchmaker."

"What do you mean?" Kurt asked.

"Oh, come on. You didn't want to talk to him, so I gave him your phone number and then made you jealous to make sure you talk to him" Sebastian said easily.

"Wait! You…" Kurt fell silent again. He had believed Sebastian back then because he knew his friend better than anyone. He honestly believed that Sebastian liked Blaine and would ruin everything if Kurt said no. But… Was it really just a play? Would his friend do that for him?

"You're welcome" Sebastian said. "Although if it doesn't work out, I would gladly fuck him."

"Stay away from him, Sebastian" Kurt said seriously. "Blaine is a great guy. You can't do that to him."

"Do exactly what?" Sebastian asked innocently.

Kurt rolled his eyes and decided not to answer that question.

"When will you tell him about the baby?" Sebastian asked after a few minutes.

Kurt groaned and closed his eyes. His friends surely hated him. They couldn't stop asking him about Blaine and how he wanted to tell him about the baby. Even Rachel and Mercedes pushed him to tell Blaine as soon as possible, although they didn't know the truth. Everybody agreed that Blaine had to know, so he and Kurt could have a real relationship. Kurt knew that they were right but it didn't make his job any easier. He was too scared to tell Blaine the truth, although he knew very well that that conversation was inevitable. Preferably as soon as possible. He couldn't act like everything was fine, not when Blaine already knew that something wasn't right with him. But what could he say?

"I have no idea how to tell him" he said honestly. "I don't want to hurt him. I really like him and I don't want to lose him."

"It's a little late for that" Sebastian snorted.

Kurt reached out and smacked the back of his head.

"Ouch!"

"You deserved it" Kurt said. "You are my friend. You are supposed to help me with this."

"Okay. What do you want me to do?" Sebastian asked.

"Help me!"

"Should I tell him?" Sebastian offered.

Kurt groaned in frustration. All he needed was a good advice but nobody seemed to understand that.

"Just get over with it" Sebastian said. "It's really great that you like him but you shouldn't let things go too far before you tell him the truth. It would be a lot more painful."

"You might be right" Kurt nodded. That was what he thought, too. He only didn't know how to tell Blaine.

"Of course I am" Sebastian said. "You have to tell him as soon as possible. You'll start to show soon and don't forget that your friends already know about the baby."

"It doesn't matter. They don't know Blaine" Kurt shrugged.

"Well, Sam does" Sebastian pointed out. "One person is enough to ruin everything. Especially that stupid blonde."

"Why do you talk about him like this? Sam is a nice guy" Kurt said.

"But he is stupid" Sebastian said. "One wrong word and your chance to stay with Blaine is ruined. How do you think he'll react if he hears about this from somebody else?"

"I guess he'll hate me" Kurt muttered.

"That's right" Sebastian nodded. "Just get over with it. Don't think about it too much. Meet him and tell him everything. Oh, and make sure there are people around because he might…"

"He might what?" Kurt asked with wide eyes.

"He might get angry and you don't know how he handles it" Sebastian said.

Kurt didn't want to believe Sebastian. He knew Blaine, he was so sweet and caring, he would never do anything to hurt Kurt. Right? No, he shouldn't listen to Sebastian. Blaine was amazing and he would take the news well. Or better than Sebastian thought.

"I'll tell him tomorrow" Kurt decided. Yes, that would be the best. He had one whole day to prepare himself for his talk with Blaine, to figure out what to say. It had to work. And if he did it right, maybe Blaine wouldn't hate him in the end.

~ o ~

"Come on, guys. Give me happy faces" Blaine said impatiently.

It was getting harder with every passed second. It should have been an easy project but it seemed like most of the models didn't get what he wanted. Not at all. Maybe they spoke a different language? That had to be it. Maybe he didn't even speak English anymore, he just didn't know.

Ten more seconds and Blaine gave up. He sighed and stepped forward.

"I said happy faces. I know it's Halloween season but we don't want to scare the readers with these grimaces. Let's try again" he said.

It didn't work. What else should he do? Tell them jokes or what? These guys should have been professionals but they couldn't have been farther from that. This shooting was a disaster.

"You know what?" he said in the end. "I think we all need a break. Ten minutes, okay? And then I want to see the happiest faces of the world. I don't care how you do it, we need those photos today."

He sighed and went to get himself a coffee. He definitely needed it. When he got his cup, he walked into the corner and pulled out his phone. He was somewhat disappointed when he didn't find any text messages waiting for him. Kurt usually texted him a lot, it was strange that he had forgotten about Blaine. Maybe he had to work a lot. Kurt was a busy man after all, he surely didn't do it because he didn't want to hear about Blaine but because he had no time to text him. Blaine smiled as he wrote Kurt a quick message and sent it. It would surely make Kurt's day better. He definitely deserved it. Kurt was so wonderful. Blaine loved every moment they spent together, he loved their text messages, their late night calls, everything they had. It was so nice to have someone like Kurt in his life, even if Kurt was so strange sometimes. Blaine started to like the man like that. It made him special.

"You seem happy."

Blaine smiled as he looked up at Sam as the man walked to him.

"I am" he said.

"So you and Kurt…"

"You know?" Blaine asked in surprise. Of course he did. Sam was Kurt's friend and Kurt surely talked about him. It made him smile again. So Kurt found him important enough to talk about him with his friends.

"Of course I do" Sam smiled. "He can't stop talking about you."

Blaine was probably the happiest person of the world in that moment.

"I'm so happy for you, guys" Sam said. "I was worried that you wouldn't accept him like this…"

"Like what?" Blaine asked. Maybe Sam knew the reason behind Kurt's behavior. It could be useful.

"You know about the baby, right?" Sam asked carefully.

Baby?

"Sure" Blaine said, trying to hide how shocked he was. What was Sam talking about? Did Kurt have a baby? No, that couldn't be possible. Kurt lived all alone. He would have known if he had a baby.

"Great. I was worried that he hasn't told you yet" Sam said in relief.

"Why would he keep it secret?" Blaine asked innocently.

"Oh, you know, most people aren't that tolerant…"

"It's completely normal" Blaine said easily.

"If you say so" Sam shrugged.

Blaine bit his lower lip, thinking. He had to know what Sam was talking about without letting him know that he hadn't heard about this from Kurt. Maybe Kurt wanted to adopt a baby. Yes, that had to be it.

"I mean… There are a lot of single parents, it's not a bad thing that he wants a baby…"

"I wasn't talking about that" Sam said. "Look, I agree with you but let's face it, it's a strange thing. Men usually aren't capable of getting pregnant and a lot of people don't even know about the possibility…"

Blaine didn't hear more. It didn't matter. Because he finally understood that Sam wasn't talking about adoption. Kurt was pregnant. Kurt was a carrier and he was going to have a baby soon. It made sense. Kurt's weird eating habits, that he was so sensitive… He had run out of the room when they had met at the fashion show. Of course. He had been sick. It had to be it. And that weird friend of Kurt and their talk about carriers…

Oh. Dear. God. Kurt was pregnant.

"Ho-how…"

"We didn't even know about it" Sam said. He certainly didn't know what was going on in his friend's mind. "He didn't tell anyone that he was going to have a baby and then boom! He's pregnant. It's crazy, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is" Blaine muttered.

"I'm so glad you accept him and baby, too" Sam said. "You're the best."

Baby. Kurt. Sex with Kurt. Unprotected sex with Kurt...

"How far along is he?" Blaine asked suddenly. "I know he told me but I must have forgotten."

"I don't know. Maybe ten weeks?" Sam said uncertainly.

Ten weeks… It wasn't hard to remember when it had happened. Blaine remembered that night very well. It had to be that night. He knew for sure that Kurt hadn't been with anybody else. Oh, poor Kurt… Of course he said that he wanted to have a baby. What else could he say? He surely hadn't even known about his condition before the pregnancy.

And now he didn't tell Blaine because he was scared of his reaction.

He was scared that Blaine wouldn't support him.

But Blaine wasn't that type. He wouldn't let Kurt deal with this alone. They were responsible got that baby, both of them. Kurt needed him and he would show him that he was there for him, no matter what.

"Blaine, you okay?" Sam asked in concern.

"Sure" Blaine said, unable to stop smiling. Okay, it was a huge thing but also a beautiful one. He was going to have a baby, with the man he loved on the top of that. Could things be any better?

He already knew what he had to do. He would talk to Kurt and reassure him that he was there for him. He already knew the best way to prove that.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hi Everyone!**

 **It's finally December. I can't believe I've survived last month but here I am. :) I only have one more task for this year. One of my teachers asked me to give a lesson for his class, but that's an honor. I'm so excited!**

 **Okay, it's enough of me. I would like to thank you for reading and reviewing my story. Here is the chapter you have been waiting for. Enjoy!**

Kurt was certainly going to be crazy. Getting ready for his date with Blaine was the hardest thing he had ever done. Because it was that night. When he would reveal his secret. He couldn't screw this up. Everything had to be perfect.

But what should he wear for such a date? Being too sexy wouldn't be too appropriate, considering how their date would end once Blaine figured out what Kurt had done. He would be so angry. He would probably yell at Kurt, tell him horrible things and then leave him. Kurt tried to prepare himself for Blaine's reaction, deciding that it was the best to be ready for the worst, but it wasn't that easy. Deep inside, he still hoped that Blaine would understand him and everything would be fine.

It was so stupid of him. Of course Blaine would be angry. He had betrayed him the worst way possible, he had lied to him, several times, he had used him, he had let him fall for him and now he was about to shatter what they had. Kurt was the most horrible person of the world. And this night Blaine would figure out what a monster he was.

Kurt took a deep breath as he pulled another shirt out of his wardrobe. It was a simpler piece than what he usually wore but it hid his stomach perfectly and it was very discrete. That was what he needed. It was a nice shirt but not as fancy as most of his clothes. It would be perfect. And on the top of that, it had extra pockets for the tissues he certainly needed after his date. Whatever Blaine said or did that night, Kurt would certainly break down. He had to be prepared for everything.

He got dressed and went to the bathroom to do his hair. It was the hardest task, he couldn't use most of his hair products because they usually made him sick. Today it was a lot worse, probably because he was so nervous. He could barely stomach anything else than orange juice. He was shaking and dizzy and had thrown up several times that day. He could just hope that nothing bad would happen until he talked to Blaine. He had to get through this as quickly as possible. Yes, that was it. He would have something light for dinner and then tell Blaine everything, simply and quickly. That was the best he could do not to make things worse than they already were.

Kurt took a few deep breaths as he stepped away from the mirror. He could do it. He had caused all this trouble for himself, he had to go through this on his own. Even if it broke his heart.

"It's time to say goodbye to your daddy" he told his growing baby as he looked down at his stomach. The baby who would always remind him on the perfect man he had met too late. "I wish I had met him sooner. Maybe then things would have been different."

He didn't want to think about what his life would have been like if he had met Blaine before that night. He didn't want to think about that he would have had a chance for a real relationship, a real family, but he had screwed up everything. It was just too painful.

~ o ~

Blaine was nervous. Okay, he was usually nervous when he met Kurt, knowing that he said stupid things when he was around men like him, but this one was different. Because it was that night. Ever since Sam had told him about the baby, Blaine couldn't stop thinking about what he would tell Kurt. He knew very well what he needed to do but he wanted to make it perfect.

There was no question, he would be there for Kurt no matter what. He didn't have any doubts, he knew very well that Kurt was pregnant with his baby. He had done the math. Kurt had gotten pregnant that night, their first time. Their only time, Blaine corrected himself. The only time Kurt had let him so close.

Everything would change after this night, though. Kurt could stop worrying about the future because Blaine would let him know that he supported him and he would be there for him, until the baby's birth and after that. Because that was what he had to do. Although he didn't agree with most of what he had learned from his parents, there was an important lecture he had gotten from them. When his mother had gotten pregnant with his brother, his father had proposed. They had gotten married, even if they had barely known each other, because that had been the right thing to do. It was something they both had to deal with and his father had chosen the perfect way to show his mother that they were together in this.

Blaine had never thought that he would be in such a situation. He was gay, the chances that he would knock up anybody… Well, it was nearly impossible. But not entirely as it seemed. Okay, he was scared but he was also very excited. He was over 30, it was the best time to have a baby. And the baby's other father just happened to be the most perfect man Blaine had ever met. Everything would be fine, he knew that.

Before he stepped out of the apartment, he checked his look one more time. Everything had to be perfect for their date. He had planned everything. He would take Kurt out for dinner, then bring him home and when it was just the two of them, he would do what he had to. He knew that he shouldn't hesitate too long because there was a chance that he would screw up everything when he was nervous, but he was scared of Kurt's reaction and it was the best if he didn't humiliate himself in front of a bunch of people. Besides, Kurt didn't seem like he wanted everybody knew about his condition. Blaine had to respect that.

"Here we go" Blaine told himself as he reached into his pocket to make sure he had the little box he needed that night. "It's time to get married, Anderson."

~ o ~

Blaine was late. Kurt hated waiting, especially now that he just wanted to get over with this. He had to. He was pretty sure that he would be sick or worse, he would pass out if he had to wait here alone any longer, trapped with his horrible thoughts. God, it was so hard. Why was it so hard? It was what he wanted after all. When he had made the decision, it had felt like such a wonderful idea. But it had been weeks earlier… So many things had happened since then. When he had slept with Blaine, he hadn't known the man. He had thought that it was just one night, that his fate was to be alone forever and raise his child alone. Now he didn't want it anymore. He still wanted the baby, he didn't regret having his child, he would never regret that, but Blaine… He needed Blaine. It was still early to say it out loud but he loved Blaine. From what he knew about the man, Blaine was perfect for him. He always made him smile, he made him feel like he was special. He didn't want to lose that. He was pretty sure that he would die if he lost Blaine.

But what else could he do? He couldn't lie to Blaine, not anymore. He loved him too much to do that to him. He knew he had made a horrible mistake by letting things go too far without telling Blaine the truth but now here was the chance to make everything better. Or not. He could never be sure how this night would end but he was sure in one thing: he would tell Blaine tonight. There was no going back, Blaine needed to know the truth. He deserved it.

Seconds later, somebody called his name and Kurt took a deep breath as he watched Blaine walk towards him. Fighting back his tears, he forced out a small smile as Blaine reached him and let himself get lost in the kiss. Blaine loved kissing. He wouldn't miss a chance to kiss him, he did it all the time. And he was such a great kisser… Kurt would miss this so much.

"I'm sorry I'm late" Blaine said.

"It's fine" Kurt said quietly.

"Are you okay?" Blaine asked in concern.

"It was a long day" Kurt said. He knew that it was the right moment. He shouldn't waste any more time but… He needed this. Just one more time with Blaine. Before he was ready to say goodbye.

Blaine was weirdly nervous. He talked usually lot, about everything and everyone. And he couldn't sit still for a brief moment. Kurt would have thought that something wasn't right here if he hadn't been so lost in his own thoughts. But he was. He wanted to enjoy this night because he was fairly certain that it was the last time Blaine talked to him at all and he had to store every single moment of this night in his mind, to have something to remind him on this wonderful man later when he was all alone and this time would be nothing but a beautiful memory of the past, but he couldn't make himself pay attention. He had tried to figure out how to tell Blaine, he had practiced it so many times but he still wasn't sure how to say it. Or when. Should he wait until they got back home? Sebastian had told him that he should do it in front of others, probably in the restaurant. But he didn't want to do that. Blaine deserved a chance to act like he really wanted to. If he wanted to yell, to punch something, Kurt had to give him that chance. He knew Blaine enough to know that he would never do that in front of others. So he had to wait until the night was over, invite Blaine to his place and get over with it.

"You are so quiet" Blaine said after a while.

"I'm just tired" Kurt said.

"You barely had anything to eat" Blaine said in worry. "You have to take better care of yourself."

"I'm not feeling well" Kurt explained. That was true. He felt like he could throw up in any second.

Blaine seemed to understand that. It was weird. He reached out, grabbed Kurt's hand and kissed it.

"It's gonna get better soon" Blaine said.

Probably yes. Not because Kurt had a stomach bug like Blaine probably thought but because the first trimester would be over within a few weeks and if he was lucky, Kurt could say goodbye to the horrible morning sickness. Such a stupid name. He still didn't understand why people used that term when it bothered him in the most unexpected moments of the day.

"Uhm… I think we should get you home" Blaine said when they finished eating. "If you aren't feeling well…"

"Yes. That-that would be great" Kurt said.

He was silent on the way home. He didn't let go of Blaine's hand for a second but he couldn't say anything. They were getting close. Just a few more minutes and Blaine would find out the truth… God, how should he do it? He still didn't know. It was probably the hardest talk he would ever have in his life. He wanted to cry so badly...

"We are here" Blaine said when they got to Kurt's place.

That was it. He had no more time. He had to tell Blaine...

"Would you… like to come up?" Kurt asked hesitantly.

"Sure" Blaine smiled.

Kurt took a deep breath and opened the door for them. He was shaking so badly that once they were in his apartment, he collapsed onto the couch. He should have had real food that day, not just orange juice and such things. He needed all of his strength for this, but he was so scared of throwing up that he couldn't eat.

"Blaine, we have to talk" Kurt said quickly before he could change his mind. He couldn't wait any longer, not when he had prepared everything to get over with this talk tonight. He had to do it now before things got more complicated.

"Let me go first" Blaine said before Kurt could gather his courage to continue.

"Blaine, I don't think…"

"Please" Blaine said as he took Kurt's hand. "I have something important to say."

"Okay" Kurt nodded, hoping that Blaine wouldn't say that he loved him. He couldn't do that. He just couldn't.

"Okay" Blaine said nervously. "Where should I start? God, this is so hard…"

Kurt frowned. He had no idea what was going on with Blaine. It was him who had to say something serious after all. Right?

But then Blaine got to his knees in front of him and Kurt gasped when he pulled out a small box from his pocket.

"What are you doing?" Kurt asked with wide eyes.

"Kurt, I know" Blaine said gently.

"I-I don't think you…"

"I know this is hard for you, but you have to know that you are not alone" Blaine said.

"Blaine…"

"I know that you are pregnant with my child" Blaine said.

"Blaine, it's not…"

"I know that you are scared" Blaine continued, not giving Kurt a chance to explain. "Of course you are. This is a huge thing. It scared me too when I figured out but it doesn't mean I'll let you do this alone. I'm here for you, Kurt. We'll be able to do this, together."

That was the right time to stop him because Blaine stopped for a moment to take a deep breath and open the box, revealing a golden ring with small blue gems. But Kurt couldn't say anything. Blaine surprised him with this step, he was still in shock and he just couldn't make himself say anything.

"I know that we barely know each other and it seems crazy, but I love you, Kurt" Blaine said. "I know we can make this work. I want to be there for you and our child. I want to help you with everything. And I want to raise our child in a real family."

He smiled at Kurt as he raised the box in his hand. Kurt started crying. He had dreamed about this for so long but it was so wrong and he knew how badly it would end. Worse than he had imagined. Fate really heated him.

"Kurt Hummel, will you marry me?" Blaine asked.

Kurt was pretty sure that his heart broke in that moment. He could have done this the easy way. He could have said yes and let Blaine think that he had accidentally gotten pregnant. It would have been so easy. But he loved Blaine too much to do that to him. Blaine deserved to know the truth. It wasn't too late for that. So he took a deep breath, reached out and closed the box.

"No" he whispered.

"Kurt, I know it's too much but at least you should consider…"

Kurt pressed a hand to his lips to suppress a sob. He could cry later as much as he wanted. But now he had to talk to Blaine.

"Please, sit down" he said.

Blaine sighed heavily but did as he was told. He put the box back into his pocket and sat down beside Kurt. Kurt reached out to grab his hands as he gathered his courage to tell Blaine the truth. That was the moment. Just a few seconds and he would break Blaine's heart.

"Blaine, I can't marry you. Not because I don't want to but because it's not right" Kurt explained.

"But…"

"Please, just listen to me" Kurt said. "I should have told you long ago. I have no idea why I didn't do it earlier. I should have… You should have known about this."

"You were scared" Blaine smiled. "I get it. Really. You didn't know that you could get pregnant. Of course you didn't. It's not a common thing and the chance that a gay man can…"

"Blaine" Kurt squeezed his hands to silence Blaine. "I knew."

Blaine didn't say anything for a long while. There were so many emotions to be seen in his eyes. First he thought that Kurt was just joking. He was almost smiling but then it turned to shock. And betrayal. God, that was the worst. Now Kurt couldn't stop crying.

"You knew?" Blaine asked quietly. "But you said…"

"I knew that I could get pregnant" Kurt said slowly. "When we were together… I know it was stupid. I was so desperate and I never thought I would see you ever again, let alone fall for you…"

"You knew" Blaine said again.

"Yes" Kurt nodded. "When we met, I was planning to have a child on my own. I just turned 30 and I was alone, I wanted to have a family and it didn't seem like I would meet the right man anytime soon, so…"

"You knew" Blaine said again. Kurt was pretty sure that he was in shock and he was worried about him. He had imagined how Blaine would take the news but he hadn't expected this.

"I'm so sorry" Kurt said.

"You just… I can't believe you did this to me" Blaine shook his head. He stood up and started pacing, gripping his hair. "So what was your plan, huh? To get pregnant and never tell me about my child?"

"Blaine…"

"Oh, wait. I know. You tried to get rid of me but then you realized that you can't do this alone and thought that I would be a great daddy" Blaine spat.

"That's not true" Kurt said. "Yes, I used you that night. It was a stupid idea and I regretted it immediately."

"Then why?" Blaine shouted. "You had dozens of opportunities to tell me. Why did you wait for so long?"

"Because I didn't want to hurt you!" Kurt shouted back. He pressed his eyes closed for a second, taking a few calming breaths. Blaine had every right to be angry with him but at least one of them had to stay calm. "You are right. I thought it was just one night and I would never see you again. I tried to avoid you at first but we just kept meeting…"

"So it's my fault" Blaine said.

"Of course not!" Kurt said. "Look, I… I dated a few men in the past but it never worked out. I never found anyone I could love. Not until you came into my life, but it was already late. I found out that I was pregnant and I knew that whatever I do, whenever I tell you, you would hate me. I didn't want to wait so long. I swear I tried to tell you so many times but…"

"But what?" Blaine asked quietly.

"For the first time in my life, I am happy" Kurt said, smiling through his tears. "You make me feel special. When I'm with you, my heart beats faster, I feel so warm and happy and carefree…"

He looked down for a moment, knowing that whatever he would see in Blaine's eyes it wouldn't be pretty. And he was right. Blaine was hurt. His eyes were cold like never before. Kurt had already lost him. Blaine didn't have to say anything to know that.

"I wasn't ready to say goodbye to you" Kurt whispered.

Blaine shook his head and laughed but there was no happiness in that. He was simply hurt and confused and he didn't know how to act.

"Please, say something" Kurt said when it became obvious that Blaine wouldn't say anything on his own.

"I don't know what to say" Blaine said. "I-I don't even know how I feel. I only know that I don't want to be near you right now."

"I get it" Kurt nodded. "I understand if you don't want to see me ever again. It was entirely my fault and I have to face the consequences."

"The only problem is that you aren't the only one" Blaine said quietly. "Whatever we do, we're going to have a baby together. It'll effect both of our lives. Not just yours."

"You don't have to get involved in this if you don't want to" Kurt said.

"I don't know what I want" Blaine said. "I think I should go."

He didn't wait for Kurt to say anything. The man practically ran out of the apartment, slamming the door shut behind him. Kurt didn't move from the couch. He kept his hands on his stomach, trying to breath. Just breath. So that was it. Blaine finally knew the truth and it was over. Okay, Blaine hadn't decided yet what he wanted to do, he could still come back, but...

"He won't" Kurt whispered.

If Blaine wasn't completely insane, he would stay away from Kurt after this. Kurt couldn't blame him, that was exactly what he expected. That was the only way it could end. It was decided before their relationship started, that night when Kurt had made that decision. He had known that it would change his life, he just hadn't known that it would be so hard.


	10. Chapter 10

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I know this chapter is so sad but I still hope you like it. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my story!**

"Isn't it a wonderful day?"

Kurt looked up at Sebastian who was seemingly too busy being happy with his own life to see how miserable he felt, although it was obvious for anyone who just looked at him. Kurt felt like he was the most unhappy person of the world. Long days had passed since that night when he had admitted everything to Blaine. More than a week, to be exact, since the last time he had talked to the man. First he had thought that giving Blaine some time to process the news and think about what he wanted to do was a good thing. Now he knew that it wasn't. At least Blaine should have texted him or something to let him know what he wanted. But nothing. Not a phone call, not a short text message, nothing. And Kurt missed him so much. He had gotten so used to Blaine's presence in his life that now it felt like he couldn't live without it. Blaine was like the air he needed to survive. Without him, Kurt felt so lost. He couldn't sleep, he couldn't eat, he couldn't focus on his job or find the joy in his pregnancy. All he could think about was what a huge mistake he had made and that he had lost his only chance for a real relationship. With the most loving man of the world.

He sighed heavily as he watched Sebastian walk around him, humming happily. It seemed so surreal. How could people be so happy when the world was such a cruel and unfair place? Okay, it was him who had made that decision but how was he supposed to know that it would end like this? He had been searching for the right man for over a decade and what had he found? Absolutely nothing. And now that he finally decided that he was better on his own and found the real reason of his existence, he bumped into the perfect guy. Only it was too late for that. Yes, life was definitely not fair.

"Why aren't you happy?" Sebastian asked as he finally looked at him and saw the obvious signs of how not well Kurt felt.

"Why should I be?" Kurt whispered.

"Because I have your test results" Sebastian singsonged, showing the folder he held in his hand. "Come on, give me that crazily excited preggo face!"

"I'm not in the mood, Seb" Kurt sighed and turned his head away.

"You're ruining my mood. That's not fair" Sebastian said. "Okay. Tell me what's wrong."

"Blaine" Kurt said. Even saying his name out loud made his heart hurt a little more. When had it happened? He had had no idea that he was in love with Blaine. But he certainly was.

"What? Did you have a fight over your weird cravings?" Sebastian asked.

"I told him everything" Kurt said quietly.

"Ouch" Sebastian grimaced. "I guess he didn't take it well."

"He said that he didn't want to see me. And then he left" Kurt said. He was crying again, no matter how hard he tried not to. "It's been days! He won't come back, right? I screwed up and I lost him. He won't come back to me because I lied to him and I-I did something horrible and now he doesn't want to see me and he won't talk to me ever again…"

"Probably yeah" Sebastian shrugged.

"Shouldn't you make me feel a little better? I'm your friend after all" Kurt said.

"Would it make you feel better if I lied to you?" Sebastian asked.

"No" Kurt admitted.

"See?" Sebastian smiled. "But I know how to make you feel better."

"You can't say anything to make me feel better" Kurt said.

"Not even with the ultrasound?" Sebastian asked.

"Does it mean you can tell the baby's gender?" Kurt asked. That would be great. He needed shopping. That always made him feel a little less horrible, but he hadn't bought any clothes for the baby or anything but some basic supplies that would be good for a boy or a girl, too.

"Nah, it's still too early for that" Sebastian snorted. "But I can tell you if the baby's healthy!"

"That would be great, too" Kurt muttered. It was the most important actually. He had lost Blaine but he certainly didn't want to lose his baby. It would kill him.

~ o ~

"Oh, she's so beautiful!"

Kurt smiled weakly as he watched the girls, cooing over the sonogram photo of the baby. He felt somewhat better now that he knew that the baby was perfectly fine, healthy, just the perfect size. It was a relief. He had stupidly read a lot about possible dangers that might occur during the pregnancy, diseases he had never heard about before and sad stories about miscarriage. They only made him more worried, he always noticed a sign on himself that might cause trouble. But at least for a while he was relieved. Sebastian had checked on the baby, he had taken his time to go through the smallest details and now they knew that the baby was just like it should be. Perfectly fine. It finally looked like a real human being with arms and legs and a cute, large head. The baby had been awake when Sebastian had checked on them, kicked and moved a lot, much to Kurt's delight. It was such an amazing sight. He couldn't wait to finally have his child in his arms.

"I don't know if it's a girl" Kurt pointed out. "I have to wait a few more weeks to find out."

"Don't you want to do one of those genetic tests?" Mercedes asked. "They can tell if the baby is healthy and also tell you its gender."

"Come on, we all know that it's a girl" Rachel said.

"I agree" Santana nodded. "It can't be anything else."

Kurt smiled at his friends. They all agreed that it had to be a girl, although Kurt had no idea how they had come to the conclusion. He accepted it for now. It was easier to imagine the baby as a beautiful little girl – with Blaine's bright eyes and curly hair, oh and his loving nature – than considering it a stranger. Yes, he could certainly imagine himself with a daughter. Not that he wouldn't be happy to have a son. It really didn't matter. He only hoped that the baby got the best parts of Blaine. Kurt wanted his child to be like the other man. It was stupid to think about his child as a reminder of the man he had lost but still… He couldn't help it. The pain was still too fresh and strong.

"Have you told Blaine?" Mercedes asked suddenly.

"What?" Kurt asked back.

"Blaine. The guy you are dating" Mercedes said slowly. "You surely told him that you are pregnant. Right?"

Kurt sighed heavily. That was something he certainly didn't want to talk about. Especially since Santana was around who knew everything.

"Yes, I told him" he said quietly.

"And?" Rachel asked.

"And he wasn't too happy" Kurt said, hoping that it would be enough for the girls. He didn't want to tell them the truth. They would hate him and he couldn't take that. Not now.

"What does it mean?" Santana asked.

"It means that he needs time to think" Kurt said in frustration. "Look, I really don't want to talk about this."

"Oh, honey. I'm so sorry" Mercedes said and pulled Kurt into a hug.

"We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to" Rachel said.

"Yes, we do."

Kurt pulled back to look at Santana. Oh, no. He knew this look.

"Santana…"

"What? Do you want to live in a lie forever? Do you want to lie to your child when it comes to that?" Santana asked.

"What are you talking about?" Rachel asked.

"Tell them" Santana said seriously.

"Tell us what?" Mercedes asked in confusion.

"No? Then I'll do it" Santana said. "Blaine is the baby's father."

"What?" the girls asked in unison.

"That's right. He fucked Lady Hummel on his birthday party and surprise! They are having a baby together" Santana said.

"Is it true?" Rachel asked.

"It's not what you…"

"I'm really disappointed in that guy" Santana said, shaking her head.

"What?" Kurt frowned.

"He has to take responsibility for his actions" Santana said. "Is he angry with you because you lied to him? Fine! But the baby is just as his as yours and he can't just act like he has nothing to do with it."

"You did what?" Mercedes asked.

"You don't understand anything" Kurt said.

"Oh, yes, I do" Santana said. "And I'm right. He has to grow up and take care of his child."

"What does she mean by you lied to him?" Rachel asked.

"We didn't use protection, okay?" Kurt almost shouted. He felt bad without anybody telling him what a horrible person he was. He didn't need the girls to point it out again. He had screwed up, he knew. But he needed his friends more than ever.

"You didn't tell him that you could get pregnant" Mercedes said slowly.

"No" Kurt muttered. "The doctor said that my chances to get pregnant weren't the best, that I had to go through a lot of tests and wait for months… And he was there and I thought 'Hey, I have nothing to lose. I won't even see this guy ever again.' But I was wrong. We started dating and I figured out what an amazing person he was. So I told him. I had to. I knew exactly how he would take the news but I couldn't lie to him anymore. He deserved to know the truth. And now he's gone."

He did his best not to cry again but he failed miserably. Those damn hormones.

"For the first time in my life, I'm in love with someone. But it doesn't matter. I lost him" he cried.

"Oh, Kurt" Rachel said gently. "I'm so sorry."

"I know I was an idiot, so you don't have to tell me again" Kurt said.

"Nobody's going to hurt you" Santana said. "Yes, it was stupid, but it's not like it was entirely your fault."

"Of course it was" Kurt said. "I had a chance for a real relationship for once in my life but I screwed up before it started. And I didn't have a chance to make it better."

He closed his eyes and took a few calming breaths. He felt sick again. Great.

"You'll get through him" Mercedes said reassuringly. "We'll help you."

"Just don't talk about him, please" Kurt said. "It's so hard. I can't stop thinking about him but I'm certainly not ready to talk. It's just too painful."

"Of course" Rachel nodded. "Uhm…"

"Does your dad know?" Santana asked suddenly before anybody else had a chance to change topic.

"No" Kurt said.

"And when do you want to tell him?" Santana asked.

"Preferably never" Kurt answered. "You know my dad. He would ask the right questions and figure out everything within a blink. I don't want him to be disappointed in me."

He would be, for sure. His father was a great man but he certainly wouldn't be too happy for his son's decision. Kurt wished he could tell him, though. He needed his father more than ever.

Santana watched him thoughtfully. Maybe they weren't the best friends but she knew Kurt, probably more than anybody else. She read him so easily. And she knew exactly what Kurt needed. He was too upset to make the right steps but luckily, she was here to help him. Santana smiled as a plan started to form in her head. It wouldn't even be that hard. She only had to talk to the right people and if she was correct, Kurt would get everything he needed soon.

~ o ~

"You look horrible, dude."

Blaine simply ignored Jeff. He knew that he didn't look his best, not that he cared. It didn't matter. It wasn't like he wanted to impress anyone. Not anymore. He sighed as his thoughts found their way back to Kurt again. Kurt. He couldn't stop thinking about the man. Everything had been so wonderful, so perfect, but then… then suddenly wasn't. Because Kurt had lied to him, about something serious.

Blaine honestly didn't know how to feel about Kurt anymore. He still liked him, maybe even loved him, he certainly missed him. But again, there was the thing with the baby… Blaine had been ready to marry Kurt when he had thought that it was just an accident, that Kurt was just as innocent in this as he was. He had thought that it could work and that was what they needed to do. But then Kurt had told him everything and suddenly everything felt so confusing and he was so hurt and… And he had no idea what to do.

"So I guess he kicked you out" Jeff sighed as he sat down beside his friend. "I'm sorry, man."

"It's not that" Blaine muttered.

"You look like crap. Really" Jeff sighed. "You should drink something."

"That's what I'm doing" Blaine said, raising his cup.

"I mean alcohol" Jeff said. "A coffee wouldn't solve anything."

"I don't drink" Blaine said.

"Well, you certainly should" Jeff said. "I would help you forget."

Forget. Was it really what he wanted? Forget Kurt and the baby? The chance for a happy life with the two of them? Blaine smiled weakly as he thought about a future with Kurt. Just for a brief moment, he wouldn't allow more for himself. He was the hopeless romantic type, he let those stupid thoughts affect his decisions way too often and it only led to disaster. No, he wouldn't let that happen again. He would stay reasonable and make the right decision. But for a brief moment, he let himself dream, about a future where he had a beautiful baby with Kurt, where the two of them were together without secrets, where they were married and happy and everything was so perfect...

"You are doing that again" Jeff said.

"Doing what?" Blaine asked innocently.

"Just forget about him, Blaine. You do remember how it ended the last time, right?" Jeff asked.

Blaine sighed again. Yes, he remembered how stupid he had been. He would never forget that. Serenading his intended at his workplace, that was such a stupid idea. Even if he would have loved getting such a surprise from someone.

"Yes, I do" Blaine muttered. "Believe me, that won't happen this time."

"Was it really that bad?" Jeff asked.

"You have no idea" Blaine replied. He hadn't told anyone about this but maybe he should. Maybe his friends would give him an advice. He looked at Jeff skeptically. Maybe Jeff wasn't his best choice, but since there was no one else around… "Okay. I'm going to tell you everything but you have to promise me that you won't make fun of me."

"Now I'm certainly interested" Jeff smiled.

"Jeff, it's serious!" Blaine said.

"Okay, fine" Jeff sighed. "Just tell me."

"You heard about carriers, right?" Blaine asked.

"Yes, I… Oh, God" Jeff said. "You knocked him up."

"Sort of" Blaine shrugged.

"Uhm, Blaine, it's not really something you can 'sort of' do" Jeff said slowly.

"Fine. Yes, he's pregnant. With my baby" Blaine said. "I thought it was an accident. You know, when we were together, we didn't use protection. I thought he didn't know about his condition and it was a surprise for him just as much as it was for me… But then it turned out it wasn't. He knew that it could happen. And he didn't tell me anything."

"The bitch" Jeff said.

"I don't know what I should do" Blaine said, shaking his head. "I-I really like him. He's a nice guy, even with those weird habits… I guess most of them are because of the pregnancy…"

"You are doing that again" Jeff said when he was that dreamy expression on Blaine's face. He snapped his fingers to drag his friend back to reality.

"Right" Blaine nodded. "So everything was fine until I figured out about the pregnancy."

"It's a huge thing. It's completely understandable that you freaked out" Jeff said.

"You don't get it" Blaine said. "I thought we could make it work. I know it's too fresh but it's not like I don't want a baby. I think I do. I'm ready for that. So I proposed and…"

"Oh, no, no, no" Jeff said. "We already talked about this, Blaine. You can't make such decisions before discussing them with me."

"But it is the right step" Blaine reasoned. "I mean, I thought it was before I figured out that he did it on purpose…"

"No, Blaine" Jeff sighed. "Look, I know you love these huge romantic gestures but you certainly need to stop before you do something crazy."

"What? I never…"

"Like buying 100 roses for your boyfriend…"

"It was Valentine's day" Blaine said.

"...Or taking him to Hawaii…"

"To celebrate our two months together" Blaine glared at his friend.

"Or serenading him in the middle of GAP…"

"Okay, that was too much" Blaine admitted.

"You always give too much and see what you get in return. They just take advantage on you" Jeff said.

"So what should I do?" Blaine asked.

"Get the guy out of your head" Jeff said. "I already know what you should do. Do you see that man in the corner?"

"Yes?" Blaine said hesitantly.

"He keeps watching you all night" Jeff said. "Go. Buy him a drink and talk to him."

"I don't think it'll solve my problem" Blaine said.

"Of course it will" Jeff said. "That's what you need, a distraction. Go. I'll stay here and make sure you don't run off with him to Vegas and get married."

Blaine only rolled his eyes. He really liked Jeff but he had no idea how to heal heartbreak.

~ o ~

Kurt did his best not to think about Blaine too much but he failed. He couldn't stop thinking about him, he couldn't stop crying and it certainly wasn't good for him or the baby. He knew he had to do something about it but he couldn't make himself move from his couch or stop eating every kind of unhealthy food he found in his fridge. He even ordered himself a pizza with extra cheese and couldn't wait to get it. He would probably eat it all, too. He would get so fat if he kept this up but he couldn't help it. When he had been with Blaine, it had been a lot easier to stop thinking about the constant hunger but now that Blaine was gone, it was all that made him a little bit better. It was so stupid, he knew. A few million calories and those stupid romantic movies wouldn't make anything better, he would just feel worse after that. And probably sick of all the food he had. But he was so weak.

He watched the couple on the screen in front of him. They seemed so happy but Kurt knew the truth. One mistake, one small mistake was enough and they would break up. They would never be back together and they would be miserable for the rest of their lives, they would grow old and die all alone...

"You shouldn't have fallen in love at all" he muttered.

Love was such a cruel thing. He had dreamed about it so much but now that he was there… He wished he had never fallen in love with Blaine. It was killing him and there was nothing that could have made him feel a little better.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. Kurt forced himself to leave the couch and walked to the door, grabbing his wallet on the way. The pizza was finally here. Great. He was getting hungry again.

He opened the door, forcing out a small smile. He certainly didn't want to seem rude just because he was dying inside. But his smile disappeared the second he realized that the person in front of him wasn't the one he expected.

"Dad?" he asked with wide eyes.

"Hello, son" Burt said as he walked inside.

"What are you doing here?" Kurt asked. "I-I thought you were in Washington…"

"I was" Burt nodded. "But then I decided to pay you a short visit."

Kurt gulped nervously. He knew this look...

"So tell me, son" Burt said after taking a deep breath. "When did you want to tell me that I'm gonna be grandfather soon?"

Kurt closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. He had no idea which one of his friends decided that it was a good idea to talk to his dad but he would kill them for sure. If he survived this conversation, of course.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hi Everyone!**

 **First of all, I would like to thank you for reading and reviewing my story. It means a lot to me.**

 **There's still no Klaine scene in this but it is coming. Luckily, the boys have some great people to help them.:)**

 **Since the holidays are so close, I'm updating my stories in the next few days and then I'm going on a short winter holiday. I'll be back in the first days of January. I wish you all happy holidays!**

When something bothered Burt Hummel, he always wore the same grim expression on his face. He was usually silent for a while, probably because he needed time to gather his thoughts but he said what bothered him eventually. Kurt was waiting for that moment to come as he ate his pizza, his eyes never leaving his father. Burt hadn't even touched his food, although Kurt was more than willing to share it with his father who was probably tired and hungry after the flight. The food went slowly cold in the man's plate but he didn't bother to touch it at all. Not like Kurt who got rid of his own pizza in record time and was thinking about getting a snack, too, knowing that this talk would be really-really long. And probably not nice. Burt didn't seem too excited to become grandparent, it couldn't mean anything good.

"Dad, are you okay?" Kurt asked carefully.

"When did you want to tell me?" Burt asked, looking up at his son.

Kurt lowered his gaze almost at the same time.

"I wanted to tell you" he said. "I just…"

"Honestly, Kurt. What are you doing?" Burt asked.

"What do you mean?" Kurt frowned.

"I know everything" Burt said.

"God, I told Finn to keep his mouth shut" Kurt sighed.

"It wasn't Finn" Burt said.

"Then who…"

"It doesn't matter, Kurt. Your friends are worried about you and thought that I should know about this. To be able to help you. And to be honest, I agree with them. It's something you should have told me long ago. I thought you trusted me" Burt said, unable to hide how hurt he was. He had been there for his son in his worst moments after all. He had thought that they had a great relationship. Apparently, it seemed like he had been wrong.

Kurt felt really bad. It wasn't like he didn't want his father to know about his pregnancy, he knew that his father supported him no matter what, but so much had happened in the previous weeks, he had had so many other things to worry about, the time just didn't seem right to talk to his father. Besides, it was something they should have talked about personally. It was a huge thing and his father surely had questions. Questions he had to answer today...

"I do trust you, dad" Kurt said quietly. "I know I should have told you long ago. I just… The time didn't seem right."

"And when would have been right?" Burt asked. "When you start to show?"

Kurt looked away again. He had felt bad already before his father showed up but it was a lot worse now.

"What does the other father think about it?" Burt asked somewhat later, his voice a lot gentler this time.

Kurt sighed heavily. Blaine. It hurt so much to think about him.

"There's no other father" Kurt said quietly.

"But I thought…"

"It was a one night stand" Kurt explained. "Well, it started to be more but…"

He took a deep breath before facing his father again. He didn't want to lie anymore. If there was somebody who understood him, it was definitely his father.

"I screwed up really badly" he said. "I started dating him but I didn't tell him about the baby. Or that I lied to him the first night. He didn't know that I could get pregnant, so when he figured about that I was pregnant, he thought that it was an accident. He was so sweet and I couldn't do that to him anymore… I told him the truth. He was so sad… All because of me."

"So what now?" Burt asked.

"He has to decide what he wants and I have to accept his decision" Kurt said. "I owe him that much, dad. I-I used him. It's completely understandable if he doesn't want to see me ever again."

"It really wasn't nice of you" Burt said.

"I know" Kurt sighed. "It was so stupid of me but I never thought we would be together. I never thought I would see him ever again. I just turned 30 and I was so upset. I felt lonely and I thought I would never have anyone in my life. So I decided not to wait any longer. I want a family, dad. I want this baby so badly… And I guess I have to accept that I can't have everything. I have this baby but I lost my chance to be happy with Blaine."

"Does he know how you feel?" Burt asked.

"I didn't really have a chance to explain myself but I guess he does" Kurt said. "I hope so."

"You know, in my time when a woman got pregnant…"

"It's not about you, dad" Kurt rolled his eyes. "Besides, it's a different time. I won't force him into anything. I manage on my own. I can take care of this baby, I know I can."

"Kurt, you know nothing about babies" Burt said. "Yes, it seems nice now that you are only pregnant. It's the easy part. But then you'll give birth and it'll change everything. Do you know how hard it is with a baby? How do you want to work when you won't have more than a few hours of sleep? Maybe you'll be lucky and you won't have to suffer from that for years but you can't be sure. And that's just the beginning. It becomes harder as your child becomes older…"

"I know, dad" Kurt said. "Believe me, I'm ready. I know it won't be easy but I'm ready. I want this baby so badly."

Burt watched his son for a while. He knew how hard it was to raise a child on his own, he had done it after all. It hadn't even been that hard with Kurt and still, sometimes he had wished he had had help because he had felt like he couldn't do it alone anymore. Kurt had been there, of course, but Burt had made sure his son didn't see anything of the exhaustion and loneliness he had usually felt.

"I just don't want you to be disappointed" Burt said. "People tend to think that having a child is like in the commercials, that it's all fun. It can be, sometimes, but it's also hard work. It's a big commitment, Kurt."

"I know, dad" Kurt said again. "Please, just trust me. I know I can do this."

At least that was how he felt in that moment. Burt smiled sadly, knowing that Kurt would have a hard time as single parent but his son was adult, he didn't have a say in his life anymore.

"You're not alone in this, you know" Burt said in the end. "If you need me, I'm always just a phone call away."

Kurt smiled and stood up to hug his father. He was so lucky that he had such an amazing dad who always supported him, even when he thought that Kurt was about to do something stupid. This time, though, Kurt knew that he could do it. It would be hard for sure, especially if he had to say goodbye to Blaine, but he would do it. He was a Hummel after all.

~ o ~

Blaine found himself sitting in the bar with his friends again. He had no idea what he was doing there. It wasn't like he wanted to do anything but sitting at home, he didn't drink and couldn't make himself to pay attention to the conversation the others had, so it was completely pointless to waste his time here when he could have been at home all alone as well, lost in his thoughts and all those sad song that reminded him on Kurt and what they had had. Jeff's plan hadn't worked the other day, but it wasn't a surprise. Blaine wasn't interested in men. Okay, he was, but he had given his heart to someone and he couldn't look at anyone like that, not after experiencing true love with Kurt.

He sighed as he looked at the beer Jeff had placed in front of him. His friends thought that a few drinks would make everything better but they were so wrong. They had no idea how Blaine felt, what he needed. No. Nobody could help him with this. Not when he didn't know what he wanted.

He played with the thought of calling Kurt. If he was completely honest with himself, he thought about it a lot. It would be so easy to talk to him and make things work. It wasn't like he didn't want it. He liked Kurt, he also liked the idea of having a baby with him, even if their relationship was fresh and they barely knew each other. Maybe he was stupid but he believed that they would make a great couple and family. He often found himself dreaming about them as a family. He imagined Kurt with a baby in his arms and he knew that Kurt would be an amazing dad. And he wanted to be, too. He wanted to hold his child in his arms, he wanted to sing for the baby every single night and then he wanted to hold Kurt until they fell asleep in their shared bed. Yes, it would be so amazing. There was only one problem, though…

Kurt had lied to him. He had used him and he had surely planned to break up with him. It hurt so badly, that was why Blaine stopped himself every time he thought about talking to the other man. He was afraid that Kurt would break his heart again and he was pretty sure that he wouldn't survive that. It was so hard to stay away from him now, if he let Kurt close and fell in love with him, deeper than he already was, that would destroy him. But he couldn't leave things like this either. Kurt was surely waiting for him to call and tell him what he wanted. But if he called Kurt, he wouldn't be able to hurt him, he felt still bad for making the man cry the last time. Damn, it was so hard...

"Blaine, are you listening?"

Blaine looked at Wes as if he only noticed him being there for the first time. Probably because that was the case. He had completely forgotten about his friends, he was so lost in his thoughts.

"I'm sorry" Blaine said.

"We were talking about…"

Jeff had no chance to finish his sentence because in the next second, a pretty woman with dark hair sat down beside them, pushing Jeff aside to make herself space at the table.

"Hello, gentlemen" she said and turned to look at Blaine. "We need to talk."

"Can we help you?" Wes asked.

The woman looked at him, thinking.

"Sure you can. Get me a drink" she said.

"Excuse me?" Blaine asked.

"And then you can go" the woman continued.

"Who the hell are you?" Wes asked.

"Someone who needs to talk to Helmet Head here, privately. Now be good, boys, and leave us alone" she said, motioning for Jeff and Wes to leave them alone.

Blaine was trying to find his voice that seemed to get lost as the woman appeared and started giving them orders but his friends moved faster than he spoke. They must have been in shock like him because they left without a word, leaving the two of them alone to Blaine's disbelief.

"Now that we got this out of the way…" the woman said as she turned back to him.

"Who the hell are you?" Blaine asked. "You know what? I don't care. Maybe you haven't noticed it but my friends and I are trying to have fun here…"

"Sure you do" the woman smiled.

"I won't listen to a stranger when I could…"

"Sit back down" the woman said when Blaine tried to leave and pulled him back down to the chair next to her. "First of all, we are not strangers. We met at Kurt's birthday party. I'm Santana, by the way. It looks like you've forgotten me."

"Oh, no" Blaine said, rubbing his forehead. "No. Seriously, before you say anything, you have to know that I'm not interested. Tell Kurt that I won't change my mind just because he sent his crazy friend instead of facing me himself. Especially not like this. This is about the two of us, he had no right to…"

"Oh, shut up" Santana rolled her eyes. "Do you always talk so much?"

"Excuse me?" Blaine glared at her.

"Never mind" Santana said. "He doesn't know that I'm here. If I'm right, he's sitting on his couch right now, watching some sappy movie and destroying the rest of his chocolate supply."

Blaine felt bad immediately. He had been so lost in his own misery that he hadn't thought about how Kurt might feel. But now he did. If he could trust Santana, Kurt was suffering just as much as he was. How could he stupidly think that Kurt got over him easily? Maybe he felt the same…

"Is he okay?" Blaine asked.

"No" Santana answered. "He's totally depressed and thinks that it's all his fault. He's my friend. My family. I can't let this happen to him, so you and I have to talk."

"I don't want to discuss this with you" Blaine said.

"Well, you will" Santana said.

"Listen…"

"No, you listen" Santana cut in. "Let's be honest. I don't like you. I think you're just an annoying, selfish dwarf with not even the best genes for his baby and Kurt could have done so much better. But it's done, he's pregnant with your baby, so we have to get the best out of the situation."

"I don't like you either" Blaine said.

"It's fine. Most people don't like me" Santana shrugged.

"I have no idea why" Blaine muttered.

"The fact is, you two are going to be dads soon and it's time to get your head out of your ass and act like an adult" Santana said.

"You don't understand anything" Blaine said.

"I do, my friend, probably better than any of you" Santana said. "The baby needs both of you, like it or not. You are responsible for it, just as much as Kurt is."

"I didn't even want this baby" Blaine said. "Look, I don't know how much he told you..."

"He told me everything" Santana said. "It wasn't too nice that he lied to you but you're just as responsible for the situation as he is."

"Excuse me?" Blaine asked. "You can't really think that…"

"As I understand, you weren't forced to have sex with him" Santana said.

"Well, no…"

"And you had a choice to wear condom" Santana continued.

"He said…"

"Do you trust every guy you just meet so easily?" Santana asked.

"What?" Blaine asked.

"You had a choice. You could have used a condom but you didn't" Santana said slowly as if she was talking to a small child.

"But..."

"This pregnancy is your fault, just as much as it's Kurt's" Santana said.

Blaine was speechless. He wanted to tell Santana that he had been lied to, that Kurt had used him to get pregnant, but he couldn't say anything. Probably because deep inside he knew that Santana was right. He had had a choice. He could have said no, he could have used protection. He had had a chance to make things differently. But he hadn't. It had been so easy to say yes to sex with Kurt, he hadn't thought about the consequences.

"But I didn't know he could get pregnant" he said in the end, even if it sounded childish.

"Are you trying to tell me that you never heard about male pregnancies before?" Santana asked.

"Well, I…"

"I thought so" Santana nodded. "I think we both know what you have to do now. Like it or not, you're going to be dad soon and you are responsible for your child. I don't care what happens to you and Kurt but the baby needs a family. You two have to decide how to make it work."

She grabbed Blaine's beer and took a few sips from the bottle before placing it back to the table in front of the man who kept watching her in stunned silence.

"Enjoy your freedom while you can" Santana said as she stood up. "Oh, one more thing. You should stop fucking random guys without protection because if you keep this up, a pregnancy will be the least you have to worry about."

Blaine's eyes widened in shock.

"That's true" Santana said. "Believe me, it's such a nasty sight when the little guy falls off."

With that said, she simply walked out of the bar, just as quickly as she had arrived. Blaine kept his eyes on the spot he had last seen the woman, long after his friends joined him again.

"That chick is something" Wes smiled as he sat down beside Blaine. "Do you know her?"

Blaine didn't answer. He was too far gone, lost in his thoughts. Santana made him see things differently and he seriously had to think about his relationship with Kurt, and the baby of course, before making the final decision.


	12. Chapter 12

**Happy New Year!**

 **I hope you enjoyed the holidays and are ready for 2018. Here is the new chapter and now I'm going on a longer research trip for my PhD. I have a few chapters written, so I can upload them regularly. I hope I won't get stuck in the woods with no Internet connection.:D**

Santana loved the romantic moments with Brittany. Ever since the two of them had gotten back together and moved into their apartment after a quickly arranged wedding, they spent as much time together as possible. They knew how lucky they were to have each other and be able to live together without fights, even after all these years. She saw how their friends struggled because they didn't have enough time for each other, because their careers were more important than their families. Santana wasn't that type. Okay, she loved her job and she was successful but Brittany was a lot more important. She would always be. Her parents had taught her the importance of family and she would never forget that lesson.

"Do you think they'll be okay?" Brittany asked when Santana told her about her conversation with Burt Hummel who had just left the city after talking to his son.

"You know Mr H. He loves Kurt and he's happy for the baby" Santana said.

"I wasn't talking about Kurt's dad" Brittany said.

Santana sighed heavily.

"I talked to that idiot but I'm not sure he knows what he has to do" she said. "I don't get it. Kurt could have had so much better. Why that guy?"

"Because he wants a baby" Brittany pointed out.

"Then he should have chosen someone who understands how important family is" Santana said. "I would never abandon my own child, no matter what happens between us. That baby is innocent and needs two fathers. It can be really hard to raise a child alone. Kurt should think about the baby's future. What if something happens to him?"

"We can have his baby and raise together" Brittany said.

"Oh, honey" Santana smiled. "I don't think it's so easy."

"Why? If he dies or falls into coma during the pregnancy, they can just take out the baby and put it in me. Or you. You would be beautiful with a baby bump" Brittany said.

Santana smiled and pulled Brittany close. She loved how simply Brittany saw the world. She wished she could be just like that, too.

She was about to kiss Brittany when someone knocked on the door. Santana groaned in frustration but didn't make a move form the couch. It was their time, nobody was allowed to disturb them.

Apparently, the person outside didn't seem to get it. They knocked again and again and it became really frustrating.

"We should open the door" Brittany said.

"They should go away" Santana said. "We don't need visitors."

"I don't think they know that" Brittany said when the knocking continued.

"Fine" Santana sighed and pushed herself up. "Don't move. I'll be back in a blink."

She walked to the door and opened it, ready to send to hell whoever was disturbing her and her wife so late.

"Finally" Kurt said when the door opened and without waiting for an invitation, he stepped inside.

"Come in" Santana said as she quickly closed the door and joined the others in the living room. She started to understand why Kurt hated so much when they appeared out of nowhere in his apartment.

"Hey, Brittany" Kurt smiled at the woman before turning back to Santana, his smile freezing the second his eyes landed on the woman. "We need to talk."

"It must be important if it can't wait until tomorrow" Santana said as she walked back to Brittany.

"It is" Kurt said seriously. "My dad paid me an unexpected visit. Guess what? He knows about the baby."

"I still don't see why it can't wait until tomorrow" Santana said.

"You called him" Kurt said.

"Yes, I did" Santana said simply. She had nothing to hide.

"You had no right to do this" Kurt said.

"Why not? It's like you did anything" Santana said. "Somebody had to talk to people affected and yes, that includes your dad. I'm sure you are happy that he supports you."

"Of course I am! My dad is… Wait a second" Kurt finally understood what Santana had just told him. "Talk to people who… Oh, my God! You talked to Blaine!"

"I bumped into him the other day" Santana shrugged.

"You… you just…"

"What? Told him what an asshole he was? Or that he should get his head out of his ass and act like a man?" Santana offered.

"I can't believe you did this" Kurt sighed.

"Relax. It's gonna be fine" Santana said easily. "He's a little slow but I think we are clear now."

"He must hate me" Kurt said. He collapsed onto the couch beside the two women and buried his face into his palms. He so hated his life.

"Don't be sad" Brittany said. "Once the baby unicorn arrives, he'll realize that it's the most magical thing of the world and want to take part of it."

Kurt smiled at her. Brittany was always so sweet, she knew how to make him feel better.

"I'm not saying that he'll run back to you and beg you to start over but he'll take responsibility for his child" Santana said. "He has to. You might be fine on your own for now but your baby will need a real family."

"I can give the baby everything. I don't need anyone to support us" Kurt said.

"That's what you think. But you are wrong" Santana said. "Look, we all know that your choice is… questionable, but it's already done. You can't change the past, the fact that you got pregnant from an immature boy who thinks like a 16-year-old…"

"Santana" Brittany glared at her when she saw that Kurt was about to cry hearing that.

"What? I'm trying to be honest with my friend" Santana said and turned back to Kurt. "So yes, you screwed up when you let him into your pants and the only way to correct that mistake is to make Blaine see what he has to do. He won't get away with it so easily. He has a family now and has to take part in the baby's life."

Kurt wanted to die. He couldn't believe Santana did this to him, even if she only wanted to help him. He had a bad feeling that she only made everything worse and now that little chance to get Blaine back was gone, too. There was nothing to do, he had to accept that he was all alone with the baby. At least he didn't have to worry about anything else…

~ o ~

Blaine tried to pay attention to his work but he soon realized that it wouldn't work. Ever since he had talked to Santana, he couldn't get Kurt out of his head. Not like before. He had been thinking about Kurt all the time but now he saw things differently. He had to admit that Santana was right, even if she was rude and Blaine would be glad if he didn't have to see her ever again. He had agreed to have sex with Kurt after all. He had also agreed not to use protection. Okay, Kurt had lied to him but it wasn't like he was the only one to blame…

Only Blaine wasn't ready to talk to Kurt. What could he say? Should he apologize? He had never been in such a situation before. It had always been him who screwed up everything and his partners had never given him a second chance. And there had been no other person involved, that was a huge difference.

But now they were going to have a baby together, with a man he barely knew but loved but also hated for his lies… So it was complicated. He would have asked for help but there was no one who understood him. His friends clearly didn't help, they thought that he needed to forget and preferably get together with someone soon. Blaine didn't want to be with another man. No, he didn't want to get to know somebody because he already knew who was the right man for him. But he was still so angry. No, upset. He had trusted Kurt and he had betrayed him. It hurt so much. But being away from him hurt a lot more. And they were going to have a baby soon and Blaine was responsible for that little life. He had to talk to Kurt, they had to discuss what to do now but he was scared of facing Kurt, knowing that he might say something stupid and screw up everything and...

Blaine yelped as he bumped into someone who seemed to appear in front of him out of nowhere and almost fell. He quickly stepped back and looked at the other man with wide eyes.

"I'm so sorry" he said quickly.

"It's fine" Sam said easily. "You seem to be lost in your thoughts."

"Yeah" Blaine muttered.

"I heard about you and Kurt. I'm sorry, dude" Sam said.

"It's okay" Blaine said. "I mean… I guess we are."

Then he realized something. Sam knew Kurt, he could surely tell him how Kurt was doing. What Santana had told him made him so worried. He hoped deep inside that it was just a lie to make him feel worse.

"Uhm… Is he alright?" he asked.

"Who?" Sam asked in confusion.

"Kurt" Blaine said.

"Oh" Sam said with wide eyes. "I think so. Okay, I'm not sure. He cries all the time but I guess it's just because of the hormones."

"He's upset?" Blaine asked sadly. He didn't want to upset Kurt. He had thought that it was the best for both of them to keep distance for a while.

"I think so" Sam said uncertainly. "But it's okay, right? He's really sensitive because of the baby."

"Sure" Blaine muttered. If it was because of the baby and because of their fight.

"Maybe you should talk to him" Sam offered. "Just because you broke up, you could be friends. He needs someone who… you know…"

"Not really" Blaine admitted.

"Who's gay" Sam said. "Don't get me wrong, he's my friend and all but I don't understand those weird things he does sometimes."

"Like?" Blaine asked with a raised eyebrow.

"You know… those weird clothes he wears most of the times or why he breaks into a song in the weirdest moments…"

Blaine watched him with wide eyes. Maybe Kurt was really crazy and it wasn't just the hormones making him weird.

"It's not a gay thing, right?" Sam asked.

"No, it's not" Blaine said.

"Just talk to him. I think he would be happy to know that you don't hate him anymore" Sam said.

"I don't hate him" Blaine said quickly. "Why do you think I do?"

"Well, I would for sure" Sam shrugged. "It seems like he lied to you and only used you to…"

"Hey, you are talking about the father of my baby" Blaine said, suddenly feeling the need to protect Kurt.

"I'm sorry, dude" Sam said, raising his hands in surrender.

"Just keep your thoughts for yourself and don't upset him" Blaine said in the end. He finally remembered where he was heading and left Sam without a goodbye.

Sam looked after him, slowly shaking his head.

"Santana was right" he whispered. "You, my friend are so slow."

Blaine still seemed to come to his senses. It was just the matter of time and he would beg for Kurt to take him back. Or at least that was what Santana had told him. He hoped that she was right this time because Kurt was absolutely unbearable without Blaine.

~ o ~

Kurt could feel that something would go wrong. He didn't exactly know what it was, there was no sign that he should be scared of something, he still had that uneasy feeling. He thought that it had to do something with Blaine, probably because Santana had ruined his chance to get together with the man again, but then he figured out that it was completely different. Only two days after his not too pleasant conversation with Santana, he had an unexpected visitor.

"Mr Jefferson" Kurt muttered as he opened the door for the apartment's owner. He rarely saw the man, only once a year or so. He had been living in this apartment for a very long time, he had never caused any trouble, the man trusted him to keep the place clean.

"Hello, Kurt" the man smiled as he stepped inside.

Something wasn't right. Mr Jefferson was always so nice and happy, Kurt had never seen him without that warm smile on his face. But now… Now he only seemed tired.

"I didn't expect you today" Kurt said as they walked into the living room.

"I know" Mr Jefferson sighed. "I really don't want to disturb you but we need to talk and I thought we should do it as soon as possible."

"That sounds scary" Kurt muttered.

"We should get straight to the point" Mr Jefferson said after taking a deep breath. "You have to move out."

"What?" Kurt asked with wide eyes. That was completely unexpected. Worse, it was horrible. It was his home. Okay, it wasn't exactly his place since he only rented it but still…

"You've been living here for… five years? And you always paid the rent in time…"

"I did. I still do" Kurt said. "I-I love this place. That's why I renovated it, because I thought…"

"Look, I don't have a choice" Mr Jefferson sighed. "My son goes to college and he needs a place to stay. I told him that he could have this apartment once the semester begins."

"That's only weeks away!" Kurt gasped.

"A month, to be correct" Mr Jefferson said. "It doesn't mean you have to move out immediately. You can stay until you find another place…"

"If I find one so fast" Kurt corrected him. It wasn't that easy to find a suitable apartment, especially now that it wasn't just about him but also a baby.

"This is New York" the older man shrugged. "I know you'll be fine."

Once he was left alone, Kurt walked back to the couch without bothering to close the front door. He collapsed and began to cry. Life was so not fair. First Blaine and now this… How was he supposed to find a new home for himself and the baby so fast? He was a single parent, there was no way that he could find another apartment so close to his work place that wasn't too expensive and was big enough for the two of them, not to mention that it was clean and safe for a baby. He had spent a lot of money for this apartment, believing that it was the place where he would raise his child… All for nothing. He had spent most of his spared money to make this place their home. And now he didn't have enough to start it over, even if he would find another home soon, he wouldn't have enough time to finish renovating the place before giving birth. If he found a place to stay at all… He remembered how hard it had been the first time and now it was a lot worse.

He closed his eyes, letting his head roll back onto the pillow. His father was right. He wasn't ready for the baby. He had thought that he was but now that he thought about it, he realized that he couldn't have been farther from that. Oh, he had been so stupid. He had been prepared for buying baby supplies and falling out of work for a few months but he had stupidly forgotten that things might go wrong and then he would be in trouble. Like right now. He wasn't even halfway in his pregnancy but he already needed help.

He would have to move back to his dad… Or worse, Finn and Rachel. Although he loved his family, he definitely wasn't ready for that. Not only because he couldn't just move in with his stepbrother and his family when he was expecting and ruin their lives but also because he wanted to live his own life and not share his home with his friends like in college. He was thirty after all, he should have been able to take care of himself. But he wasn't. He was just stupid and weak and now he would ruin another person's life as well because he was too selfish to wait until...

"Kurt?"

Kurt opened his eyes wide, not believing his ears. It had to be a dream. He couldn't be here.

"Blaine?" he cried.

Blaine took a few steps forward, slowly swinging the bouquet of roses he held in his hand.

"Are you alright?" Blaine asked uncertainly.

"No" Kurt cried. "My life is falling apart. I'm losing everything and I'm not sure I can do this anymore."

He just realized that he was talking to Blaine, his ex-boyfriend who was probably angry with him. Who would yell at him because of Santana, who would tell him what a horrible person he was… No, Kurt couldn't deal with that right now.

"Please, just don't yell at me" he said quietly. "I know you're hurt and you're right bu-but I can't take it right now. It's too much."

"Hey, I'm not mad at you" Blaine said gently as he take a seat beside Kurt and pulled him into his arms after placing the flowers onto the coffee table. "What's wrong?"

"I'm homeless" Kurt said.

"What?" Blaine frowned.

"I have to move out" Kurt explained. "The owner wants to take the apartment back because his son needs it. I have to leave and-and I don't know what to do. How am I supposed to find a place like this so fast?"

Blaine looked around. Kurt was right, this apartment was perfect, with enough space for two or three people, it was light and beautifully decorated and he could also tell that Kurt had made a few changes to make it more suitable for a baby. Their baby, he reminded himself.

"What about your family? Or your friends? They can surely help you…"

"I'm going to have a baby soon. I can't do that to them. No, I just can't disturb them" Kurt said, shaking his head.

"There has to be a way…"

"I don't know" Kurt said.

Blaine made his decision. Maybe it was stupid and he would regret later but as he watched Kurt cry in desperation, he knew exactly what he had to do. Santana was right, Kurt was pregnant with his baby and he had to take responsibility for his own child.

"Move in with me" he said.

Kurt was so surprised that he stopped crying immediately. He slowly pushed himself away from Blaine to look into his eyes and check if he was joking with him. But Blaine seemed perfectly serious.

"You can't be serious" Kurt said in the end.

"I am" Blaine said, sounding a lot more confident than how he felt. "I have a huge place and I was looking for a roommate anyway…"

That was a lie. Blaine didn't want to live together with anyone else. Well, not anyone but the most important person in his life right now.

"I don't think it's a good idea" Kurt said uncertainly.

"It would be perfect" Blaine said. "Look, I want to be there for you and the baby. I'm still not sure what will happen between the two of us but I want to help you around the baby. Let's face it, it would be a lot easier if we lived together."

Kurt didn't reply. He didn't seem too convinced.

"Just until you find a better place to stay" Blaine quickly added. "I don't want you to be homeless or move in with one of your friends. They are all crazy."

He finally smiled. Only for a few seconds but it warmed Blaine's heart. He made Kurt happy.

"So what do you say?" he asked.

"Fine" Kurt said in the end. "But only until I find a new place for myself and the baby. We won't bother you longer than necessary."

Blaine was hoping that Kurt would stay with him forever but this answer was fine, too, at least for now. Their relationship was complicated, they weren't even together and it was him who said that he didn't know what he wanted, so he accepted Kurt's choice. And who knew, maybe living together would help them solve their problems. They would be forced to meet each other every day after all, it surely wouldn't be that bad. Or so they both believed.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I know it's been a while... My trip was really exhausting and then my family was sick, so I had a lot less time than I thought. But I'm finally back with the newest chapter and hopefully I will be able to update more frequently.**

 **I hope you like this chapter. Please, let me know what you think.**

Kurt didn't know if he was doing the right thing. It had been so easy to say yes to Blaine's offer. He had been happy that Blaine finally talked to him again and he had felt so relieved that his problem was solved so easily. But then time passed and he started to think about the two of them. And the more he thought about it, the more he worried. What if it wouldn't be so easy? Blaine was still upset with him after all. What if he changed his mind? What if he realized how hard it was with Kurt who had the weirdest habits in his hormone-driven state and didn't want to live with him anymore? So Kurt panicked, not knowing what to do. He wanted to move in with Blaine but he didn't want to ruin their second chance to be together. Okay, they still weren't together but they had taken the first step forward, they talked to each other again and he secretly hoped that Blaine would forgive him one day, that he would realize that they were meant to be together and they would raise their baby together, as a couple. He wanted it so badly. No matter what his friends said, Blaine was the right man for him and he couldn't lose him. So he turned to his friends for advice, hoping that they would support him, but...

"No" Rachel said.

"Absolutely not" Santana said at the same time.

"Why? I think it's a great idea" Kurt said.

"That's because you're pregnant and you can't see things straight" Mercedes said.

"Isn't it a good thing? I mean… He wants to live with me. It was his idea after all, it surely means that…"

"It means that he feels pity for you. But it doesn't mean that it's a good idea. No. It's probably the worst idea you've ever had" Santana said.

"Why don't you move to us?" Rachel offered. "You could use the guest room until you find something suitable."

Kurt gave himself a few seconds to think about the answer. He didn't want to hurt Rachel, it was really sweet of her that she offered him to stay with them for a while. Kurt had expected that from her, they were family after all, they always helped each other the best they could. He also knew that they wouldn't mind having him around but he really didn't want to move in with Finn and Rachel. They had their own lives, their own problems, they didn't need a pregnant family member on the top of that.

"Thank you for the offer, Rachel. I really appreciate it but I think it's something Blaine and I have to solve" he said in the end. "It's about our baby. We are adults, we have to take care of it."

Even if he wasn't enough to take care of his child on his own. Kurt was still upset. His life had changed so fast and now it seemed like he had lost everything in no time. He had thought that everything was ready for the arrival of the baby but now he was scared of the future. He didn't want to tell his family about this, though. Rachel would tell his father and the last thing Kurt needed was having another conversation with his dad about his decisions. He wanted to prove them that he was able to take care of his child on his own. Well, not completely on his own, he had Blaine who would surely help him with everything. Who knew, if they could get over the past, they could make amazing parents. Kurt still believed in that. And if things didn't work out… He didn't want to think about that. Now he was happy and hopeful, he didn't need anything to ruin that.

"I agree" Santana said. "I still don't think it's a good idea."

"Well, I made a decision. I'm gonna move in with Blaine and then see how things work out" Kurt said stubbornly. "Trust me, we'll be fine."

It was enough to look at the girls to know that they didn't trust his decision at all. Kurt hoped that they were wrong this time. He wasn't sure if he could handle another heartbreak.

~ o ~

Luckily, his friends didn't try to convince him that he made a bad decision anymore. Santana and Rachel tried a few times, Rachel also sent Finn to talk to Kurt one day, but the man made it clear that he wouldn't change his mind, so they gave up in the end. When it was time for Kurt to move out, they came to help him pack his things and transfer them to Blaine, much to Kurt's relief. He didn't want to fight with his friends and it was so good having them around. It was such a hard time for him. He had never thought that leaving the place he had called home for so long would be so hard. He had known that he would have to leave one day but he had also thought that it would be when he moved to his boyfriend/husband and it would have been a decision he made with his partner. Well, it was a decision they made together with Blaine but the situation was nothing like Kurt had imagined. He kept thinking about what Santana had said the other day, that Blaine only offered him to stay with him because he felt bad for Kurt and he had made a rushed decision he might regret later. Kurt was worried that she was right and moving in with Blaine would only ruin their not too perfect relationship. Kurt knew very well that he was hard to bear. He had a lot of weird habits, not to mention those he had taken on since he was pregnant. He was also very sensitive, he cried a lot and got frustrated way too easily. Like when he couldn't find his favorite ice cream the other day. He had gone through half of the city searching for it, without success. He had returned home in the end, getting tired but also really sad. He knew deep inside that it was crazy but he couldn't help it. Those weird cravings came out in the worst moments and he couldn't fight against them.

And there were the emotions, too. What bothered him the most was that everything made him cry. He cried when somebody was rude to him, something that happened way too often in New York, he also cried when he watched a romantic movie, also something he often did because they reminded him on Blaine, but he was able to cry when he saw something sweet like a mother with her child. Or a commercial. Those were the most dangerous, usually stuffed with light and music, happiness, and all those adorable scenes about babies and pets. The other day he had seen a cat food commercial and it had been so sweet that he couldn't stop crying. And it had become a lot worse when it was followed by a coffee shop's commercial, it had reminded him that he couldn't have any coffee for a long time, even if he felt like he would die if he couldn't get a cup of coffee in that moment. He had stayed strong for his baby, of course, but it didn't mean it was easy. He stopped watching TV after that to keep his sanity but he secretly bought himself coffee every second day or so, only to keep the paper cup in his hand until the coffee went cold and its delicious smell passed. People surely thought that he was crazy but he couldn't help it. Even if he couldn't drink coffee anymore, he needed its scent. He was pretty sure that he wouldn't survive without it.

Luckily, his friends drank a lot of coffee while helping him move out, so that made Kurt's day a little bit better. And so did Blaine. He seemed to notice how hard it was for Kurt to leave the place he had called home for years and move to somewhere else, so he tried to be around all the time and enlighten the mood with a few well-placed jokes. Kurt tried to smile and hide how he felt because he didn't want to upset Blaine at all. It was so sweet.

But Kurt was upset. It became worse with every box his friends carried out of the apartment and when most of his things were gone, Kurt simply sat down onto the couch and tried not to cry. His heart felt so heavy, as if he lost something important. It didn't make much sense. He should have known that he wouldn't stay here forever, besides, it was just a place. He would have a new home. He would have everything that mattered, only the walls would be different. It still didn't make him feel any better.

"Are you okay?" Blaine asked as he took a seat beside him.

Kurt smiled at him. Blaine tried so hard to make him feel better. He was careful with his words not to make Kurt feel bad and he acted like everything was fine. Kurt was still afraid that things would change with time.

"Sure" he said in the end. He wanted to be, really.

"I know it's hard" Blaine said. "I remember when I moved to New York. I hated being home and I thought it would be amazing to live on my own but… It was still so hard to leave everything behind."

"It's scary" Kurt admitted. "This place was my home. I thought I would raise my child here but…"

"I'm sorry" Blaine said.

"It's fine" Kurt sighed.

"You'll feel better soon. I swear" Blaine said.

Kurt wanted to believe him but he felt like his life was over. He was so stupid. It was just a place after all.

"Is this your last box?" Blaine asked as he pointed at the boy at Kurt's feet.

Kurt took a deep breath and nodded. He kept that box near because there were his most important belongings in there. Mostly things he had bought for the baby and some photos. He wanted to make sure that box was safe, it meant more than anything else he had.

"I'll take it to the car" Blaine said. He stood up and grabbed the box. "Take as much time as you need. I'll be waiting downstairs."

Kurt was left alone as Blaine walked out of the apartment. He didn't move for a while, he looked around in the now empty living room, remembering everything he had gone through here. Then he finally gathered his strength and stood up. He walked from one room to the other, silently saying goodbye to the place. His home. It would be so hard to start a new life in a new place. He already missed living here.

He walked back into the living room in the end and looked around one more time. So that was it. A period of his life was over and now he had to look forward. That was the only way. He truly hoped that living with Blaine would be easy because giving up this place was so hard. It would hurt for a while for sure.

"It's time to go" he told himself.

Blaine promised him to have fun that night, so Kurt could get used to his new home. Kurt had no idea what it meant but he trusted Blaine. Yeah, they would have a great time together and Kurt be able to get over this in no time.

~ o ~

"Do you want to watch TV?"

Kurt looked at Blaine, sitting beside him on the couch. Fun was the last thing they had. It wasn't like they didn't try but it just didn't work. They went through Kurt's boxes and started unpacking his things. First the clothes and a few smaller things that were important for Kurt. Blaine thought that it would make Kurt feel home but that wasn't the case. Kurt was crying the whole time and it made Blaine feel horrible as well. It seemed like Kurt didn't want to live with him at all. He certainly didn't feel home. He asked Blaine about everything and didn't do anything without his permission. Blaine tried his best to show Kurt that he was fine with everything Kurt did but he found himself watching the man all the time and had that weird feeling every time Kurt changed something in his apartment. Kurt must have seen it, too, because he moved his things back to his room, even if there was no place for so many things. Blaine decided that spending some time together would solve their problem and help them get used to this new life they shared. Only he didn't know how to start. They ended up sitting on the couch but none of them knew what to say.

"You want to?" Kurt asked back.

"Uhm… Yeah, why not?" Blaine said. "What do you want to watch?"

"I don't know. Whatever you want" Kurt said.

Blaine tried to find something they would both enjoy but gave up after a few minutes. He realized that he barely knew Kurt. Sure, he knew a few things about him but they had never gone that far to talk about TV shows. Or anything more than the basics. Blaine started to panic. He didn't know Kurt at all and now they were living together, they were going to have a baby together and it suddenly seemed too much.

"Are you hungry?" he asked next. He had no idea how they should get to know each other. They certainly had to because they were only months away from having a child and it would be hard for sure. They had to learn how to work together.

"Not really" Kurt answered.

Blaine sighed heavily. He knew that it was hard for Kurt right now but they had to try to communicate. He needed a topic Kurt would talk about. Like...

"Is everything alright with the baby?" he asked.

Bingo. Kurt sat up straight and smiled.

"It's perfectly fine" he said. "You should have seen it. It looks like a real human. I mean, you know, not like the first few times…"

"I have no idea how it should look like" Blaine admitted. He barely knew anything about kids.

Kurt left him to walk back into his room but came back a minute later with a few photos.

"Here" he said as he pushed the first photo into Blaine's hand. "See? That was on the sixth week."

Blaine leaned closer. He had no idea what he should have seen. There was a little black point in the middle of the photo but that was all.

"That's the baby" Kurt explained.

"That's not a baby" Blaine said.

"It was too small" Kurt rolled his eyes. "Here. This is the next one."

Blaine started to think that Kurt was pregnant with an alien because it certainly didn't look like a baby. There was a bigger thing on this photo but it didn't look like a human either. More like a… potato.

"But it looks like a human now, right?" Blaine asked, hoping that the baby wouldn't look like this forever. Kurt had said that it looked like a human but he wasn't sure if he could trust Kurt with this. He didn't seem to notice how scary these first photos were.

"Of course" Kurt said and pushed another photo into Blaine's hands. "You should have seen it. It was kicking me the whole time, it was so sweet."

He looked down at his barely noticeable baby bump and put a hand on it. He looked so peaceful like that. Blaine forced himself to look away after a while and focused on the photo instead. To his relief, Kurt was right. There was a real baby on the photo this time. It had a huge head but it didn't matter. It was real. Blaine could see its arms and legs and he was so happy that the baby was healthy that he didn't care if it would have a bigger head than a normal baby, they would love it no matter what.

"You seem happy" Kurt said as he watched Blaine.

"I am" Blaine said. He really was. There was the proof in his hand that he was going to have a child soon. It felt amazing.

"You could come to the doctor with me the next time" Kurt said.

"Really?" Blaine asked hopefully.

"Of course" Kurt nodded. "It's your baby, too. I won't force you to do anything you're not comfortable with but I won't leave out of anything either."

"I would love to go to the doctor with you" Blaine said.

It was all new for him but he wanted to see his child, of course. And he wanted to be there for Kurt. That was the reason why he had offered Kurt to stay with him. Okay, not just that, he wanted to have Kurt close because he had missed him so much, but also because he wouldn't miss the important moments of the baby's life. Now that he saw it, he knew that it was real, it was a lot easier. It wasn't made up in his mind, it was really happening. He was going to have a baby.

His eyes landed on Kurt's stomach. He started to show, although it wasn't obvious, his baby bump was so small but it was still there. And it would be bigger and bigger with time. It would be strange for sure but it was also beautiful. Pregnancies made people so peaceful and happy. No wonder, a little life was growing in there, a real person, their own child on the top of that. Blaine wanted to touch it so badly. It was probably a bad idea, Kurt had just moved in and they couldn't even talk about anything but the baby. They should get to know each other better and feel more comfortable around each other before moving to that. So Blaine wouldn't ask. No. He was an adult man, he could control himself...

"Can I touch it?" he asked before he could stop himself. Shit.

Kurt seemed surprised at first but then he reached for Blaine's hand and put it on his baby bump.

"I can't feel anything" Blaine said after a while.

"Of course not. It's too early for that" Kurt smiled.

"It's so…"

"Weird?" Kurt offered.

"Wonderful" Blaine said. "That's our baby growing in there. Can you believe it?"

It was so exciting. Now he knew that offering Kurt to stay with him was a great idea. He would be there all the time to share these wonderful moments with Kurt. These few months would be amazing and then they would welcome their baby and everything would be a lot better. He had no idea why people with children complained so much. It was the best thing that could ever happen to someone, right?


	14. Chapter 14

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Thank you so much for your reviews and PMs. I love when you share your thoughts with me. Parenthood is definitely hard but so wonderful. :)**

Despite the rocky start, living together with Blaine was a great thing. Kurt had had his fears about living together with the father of his baby who wasn't his boyfriend but more than a friend but still not that close that he could say… So his relationship with Blaine was complicated. They still managed to make it work. It had been weird at first, of course. They had been living on their own for a very long time and now they had to share Blaine's apartment. Both of them had to learn how to cooperate. Kurt remembered how hard living with Rachel and Santana had been. There was a reason why he had moved to his own place as soon as possible and why he didn't want to live with his stepbrother and his girlfriend, even if they were his family. He hated sharing the shower, that his roommates ate up his food without asking him first, or that they came home drunk in the middle of the night, kicking him out of the bed. Okay, that didn't really happen anymore, they were all adults after all, but his baby needed the best it could get and it was Blaine for sure.

Blaine was amazing. He didn't only handle Kurt as a roommate but a good friend. He always asked Kurt if he was fine or if he needed anything, he woke up with him in the middle of the night or early in the morning when Kurt was sick, he was beside him and gave him support. He let Kurt choose which movie to watch every single evening and he only bought food he knew Kurt's stomach could handle. He knew when to leave Kurt alone or when the man needed him. He also noticed that Kurt couldn't live without the smell of coffee, but he also knew that Kurt couldn't go to the coffee shop on his own anymore because people found it weird that he bought himself coffee but didn't have a single sip of it, only enjoyed its smell as long as it lasted, knowing that the caffeine wouldn't be good for the baby. So Blaine bought themselves coffee everyday and brought it home, so he could drink his own and Kurt could give in to his craving without anyone but Blaine watching him. So Blaine was absolutely perfect and Kurt loved living with him.

Blaine also loved everything baby related. They talked a lot about their child, they read articles together, they talked about names and how to raise their child. It looked like they could make it work. Although Kurt still thought about finding a new apartment before the baby was born, he didn't really keep up his search anymore. He told himself that he had no energy for this right now but the truth was, he loved living with Blaine and didn't want to be alone anymore. Not to mention his feelings that became stronger with every single day. Maybe just because of the hormones, he wasn't sure, but he was pretty sure that he was in love with Blaine and couldn't imagine his life without the man. He needed Blaine so badly.

Blaine was impossible to read, though. Sometimes it felt like they were back to normal, sometimes it seemed like they were only friends. Kurt didn't make a move, worried that he might ruin everything. So he kept his thoughts for himself and hoped that Blaine would take that step and then they would be together again and raise their child in a family, they would get over the past and live in love forever, get married and have more kids and move to a house and have a dog and...

"Kurt, are you alright?"

Kurt almost groaned in frustration. As much as he loved Blaine, he hated being disturbed in his most beautiful daydreams.

"Sure" he said.

"You seem worried" Blaine said. "The baby is fine. I know it is."

Kurt smiled and reached out to squeeze Blaine's hand. They were waiting for Sebastian to arrive. Blaine decided to accompany Kurt this time because he wanted to see the baby, too, and make sure it was fine. And if they were lucky, they would find out its gender, so they would finally know if they were going to have a son or a daughter. It didn't really matter but they were tired of calling the baby baby and it would be so much better to give it a name and handle the baby as a real person. Because it was a person after all and deserved to be treated like one.

"Do you think it's a girl or a boy?" Blaine asked after a while.

"Again, I have no idea" Kurt said.

Blaine asked him about his symptoms a lot as if they could find an answer in them. Kurt read enough about pregnancy to know that nothing was sure until the baby was born. They would ask Sebastian, of course, but he could be wrong, too. Reading from the symptoms was simply crazy because they didn't mean anything. Only that Kurt was having a hard pregnancy, considering that the first trimester was over and he was still sick. His body surely didn't know that the second trimester was about enjoying pregnancy and not suffering every second of every day. Okay, it wasn't that bad anymore but Kurt would really appreciate to have one day without throwing up. Just one day.

"Do you want a boy or a girl?" Kurt asked.

"I don't know" Blaine said. "I don't think it matters. I only want a healthy baby."

"Me too" Kurt said.

They were silent for a while. Blaine took Kurt's hand into his, keeping it in a tight hold. He seemed more nervous than Kurt.

"The baby is fine" Kurt said.

"I know" Blaine said.

"We have nothing to worry about" Kurt said.

"I know" Blaine said again.

He only tightened his grip on Kurt's hand.

"Where's your doctor?" Blaine asked impatiently.

"He'll be here soon. Don't worry" Kurt smiled. He was glad that Blaine cared about the baby but what he was doing was insane. There was no sign that they should be worried.

Sebastian arrived a few minutes later, much to Kurt's relief. Blaine seemed to be close to panic, so Sebastian saved them both. Blaine seemed surprised to see the man and then Kurt remembered that he might have forgotten to tell Blaine that Sebastian was his doctor.

"Uhm… do you remember Sebastian?" he asked.

"Yeah. It's hard to forget" Blaine muttered, keeping his eyes on the man.

"It's nice to see you again, Blaine" Sebastian said. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised to see you here."

Blaine simply nodded. He didn't want to be jealous, there was no reason to be. Sebastian was Kurt's friend, of course he was his doctor as well. Kurt surely trusted him more than a stranger. But Blaine couldn't help that feeling. He knew how these examinations worked, at least he had an idea and he wasn't sure if he wanted Sebastian that close to Kurt. It just didn't seem right. Sebastian was a young, good-looking man and from their short conversation earlier Blaine could tell that he was gay. He wasn't sure if he was comfortable with that.

"Come in" Sebastian said and opened the door for them.

Blaine followed Kurt silently and stopped beside the bed as Kurt took his place. It was weird to be here but he wouldn't leave, that was sure. He had to be here in case… anything happened. Just to make sure Kurt was safe. Yes, that was the reason. Not because he was worried that something might happen between him and Sebastian. It would have been stupid, they weren't together after all and Kurt was free to do whatever he wanted. If it didn't mean being together with another man, of course.

"How are you doing?" Sebastian asked.

"I'm still suffering of morning sickness" Kurt sighed. "I'm getting tired of it."

"It should go away with time" Sebastian said. "I think it'll get better soon but don't be disappointed if you don't get better. Sometimes it happens."

"Great" Kurt muttered.

"Isn't it dangerous for the baby?" Blaine asked in concern. "Kurt can barely eat anything healthy."

"Don't worry about the baby. It takes everything it needs. If there's someone you should be worried about, it's Kurt" Sebastian said.

"Why? What will happen to Kurt?" Blaine asked in concern.

"Nothing, Blaine" Kurt said, rolling his eyes. It was so not cool that Sebastian tried to scare him, seeing how worried Blaine was. "I take the vitamins every single day. I'll be fine."

"Okay" Blaine said quietly. He didn't seem too convinced.

"Alright. Do you want to see the baby?" Sebastian asked.

"Of course" Kurt said excitedly.

"Maybe I can tell you if it's a boy or a girl. If you want to know, of course" Sebastian said.

"That would be great" Blaine said.

He watched as Kurt pulled up his shirt and pushed down his pants a little. His eyes widening. It didn't seem too appropriate. Was it really how they made ultrasound? Kurt was hot, especially since he was pregnant, but it didn't mean everyone should know that. Especially not his gay friend.

So Blaine kept his eyes on Sebastian the whole time, ready to stop him if necessary. He certainly didn't like the way Sebastian touched Kurt's stomach but Kurt looked like it was completely fine. Was it? Blaine didn't want that guy to touch Kurt like that.

"Everything seems fine so far" Sebastian said. "Let's see the baby."

Blaine had to turn his head away as Sebastian turned the screen towards them and he finally saw his baby for real. Everything else seemed to disappear in that moment. Blaine finally saw his child, it was moving, kicking. It was real. It was his child on the screen and Blaine almost cried as he watched the baby. His very living, healthy baby.

"Calm down, little one" Sebastian said.

Blaine barely stopped himself before saying something about that. Sebastian should just leave the baby alone.

"He needs the baby to stay still to check if everything is fine" Kurt explained, seeing how Blaine looked at the other man. He didn't know what was going down in Blaine's head, of course, he simply thought that Blaine wanted to enjoy the sight.

"That's right" Sebastian nodded. "Don't worry. You'll learn how it works, too."

"Sure" Blaine muttered. What could he say? He hadn't even known about the baby for a long time and then he hadn't talked to Kurt, so he had missed everything so far. But he was here and he would be here every single time from now on. He was the father of this baby after all, he would show this asshole that he couldn't treat him like this.

"Is the baby alright?" Kurt asked.

"Yes" Sebastian nodded. "Everything seems perfect. Now let's see if we can find out its gender."

"How exactly do you want to do that?" Blaine asked.

"What do you think?" Sebastian asked in amusement.

"You surely don't want to…" Blaine motioned at the screen, unable to continue. It wasn't right. The baby had rights, they should give it privacy and not examine things… there.

"It's okay, Blaine" Kurt told him.

"No, it's not!" Blaine said and turned to Sebastian. "You're not allowed to look in there."

"Blaine, that's the only way to find out the baby's…"

"I don't care" Blaine said. Kurt fell silent immediately, afraid of Blaine's reaction. Blaine took a deep breath before saying anything again, worried that he might scare Kurt. "I'm sorry but we can't. That's not right."

"Okay" Kurt nodded. "If you aren't comfortable with it, we won't look between the baby's legs, okay?"

"Okay" Blaine nodded.

"You know that we have to check those parts eventually, right?" Sebastian asked carefully. He forgot to mention that he already did. Kurt and Blaine had no idea what to look for and he was curious, not to mention that he had to check over the baby, whatever Blaine thought about it. They weren't in the middle ages after all, it was the common process.

"Not now" Kurt said quickly.

He didn't want Blaine to feel uncomfortable. It was all new for him, he had to get used to the situation and Kurt didn't want to rush anything. They had enough time to find out if they were going to have a girl or a boy and decorate the nursery. Especially since they had to decide where it would be. He still didn't know if they would live together until the baby's birth or go on their separate ways. So it was better to wait with it.

"In that case, I think we are done here" Sebastian said. "Don't forget that we celebrate my birthday this weekend. I hope you'll be there."

"I wouldn't miss it" Kurt said.

"You want to go on a party?" Blaine asked. Kurt hadn't told him about that.

"Oh, you can come with him if you want to" Sebastian offered. "I guess we have to get to know each other better if you two stay together."

"We aren't together" Kurt said.

"Really? But I thought…" Sebastian looked from one man to the other.

Blaine smiled triumphantly and put an arm around Kurt.

"We're working on it" he said.

"Are we?" Kurt asked as he turned to him.

"Sure" Blaine said. "We agreed that we want the best for the baby, right? It means that we have to work together, one way or another."

Maybe he didn't choose the right words. At least Kurt didn't seem too happy with the answer. He pulled away from Blaine and checked on his clothes, then walked back to Sebastian for the sonogram photos, careful not to look at Blaine.

"Thank you, Sebastian" Kurt said. "See you on Saturday."

"Remember, you're both invited" Sebastian said. Although he loved making fun of his friends, something told him that this might not be the right moment, so he kept his comment about these two for himself and simply let them go.

It was clear that something wasn't right with Kurt as he walked out of the room, not waiting for Blaine at all. He didn't stop for a second as they made their way down the corridor and to the elevator. Blaine watched him in worry as they waited to arrive. Kurt didn't even look at him. He was angry with him for some reason.

"Are you alright?" Blaine asked.

"Sure" Kurt said simply.

"We have some more time before I have to go back to work" Blaine said. "We could have an ice cream or something to celebrate that the baby is fine."

"I'm not hungry" Kurt said.

"Are you angry with me?" Blaine asked. "I know that sometimes I don't use the right words but I didn't mean to hurt you."

"It's fine. You were just honest" Kurt shrugged.

It didn't make any sense. First Blaine seemed jealous, then he practically told him that he didn't want anything from Kurt… Kurt was confused. Maybe living together wasn't that good after all. He had thought that it would help them get back together but maybe it just made things harder. They were so used to each others' company that Blaine simply considered him as a roommate. Great. Now he would raise the baby alone, he would stay home with their child all alone while Blaine went out whenever he wanted and fucked whoever he wanted. And he had to see it since they lived together and Blaine surely wouldn't hide anything from him just because they had a baby together.

"Are you crying?" Blaine asked after a while.

"Hormones" Kurt told him. He kept walking, although he knew very well that they lived too far away to make it there in his feet. Damn, he missed his apartment so much.

"Are you sure? Because I'm really sorry if I said something…"

"You didn't, okay?" Kurt said in frustration.

He didn't even know why he was so angry. He didn't want to be and it wasn't like Blaine said something he hadn't known yet. But crying felt so right in that moment and Kurt only wanted to be alone, preferably without Blaine following him.

"I'll see you tonight" he said simply.

Blaine finally stopped. It was clear that Kurt didn't want to see him, although he wanted to talk to him. They had to discuss a lot of things, not only the sudden change of Kurt's mood but also the visit in the hospital. They had to talk about the baby because Blaine also wanted to talk about Sebastian, but he had to be very careful because Kurt was really sensitive and he would just cry again if Blaine said something wrong about his friend. But Kurt didn't seem like he wanted to talk to him right now, so Blaine had to find another way to figure out if Sebastian's behavior was only friendly or there was something more. He didn't know what he wanted to happen between him and Kurt but he certainly didn't want to see Kurt with another man.

He ended up in the club where he usually met his friends. He quickly texted them, telling them to meet down there. Ashe expected, Jeff and Wes arrived soon. They usually didn't work at this time of the day and when they didn't work, they were home or here. It was easy to reach them. Blaine quickly told them everything he had seen and heard, hoping that his friends would be able to help him.

"I don't get it" Wes said in the end. "You aren't together."

"No" Blaine said.

"But you asked him to live with you" Jeff said.

"Yes" Blaine nodded.

"And now you're jealous" Wes continued.

"I wouldn't say jealous. Just careful" Blaine said.

"Of course" Wes muttered.

"So what should I do now?" Blaine asked. "Kurt seemed so angry today. I have no idea what I did wrong."

"Are you sure he knows that you two aren't together?" Jeff asked. "You said that the pregnancy makes him act so weird. What if he thinks that you're dating again?"

"Jeff, he's pregnant but not crazy" Blaine said slowly.

"I wouldn't be that sure" Jeff snorted. "Knowing you dating history, I'm pretty sure that this guy is just as insane as any other. And it's a lot worse because he's also really smart. Can't you see it? He wants you for his baby's daddy."

"He doesn't need me, Jeff" Blaine said. "He's such a strong person. He would be fine on his own."

"Then why don't you kick him out?" Jeff asked.

"Because he's pregnant with my baby!" Blaine almost shouted. Sometimes he wasn't sure why he and Jeff were friends. He could say such stupid things.

"See? That's what I'm talking about" Jeff said. "You, my friend, are in trouble."

"Leave him, Jeff" Wes said and turned back to Blaine. "So you want to be with him."

"I don't know" Blaine said. "I mean, I like having him around but I'm still worried that he might lie to me again."

"You have to get over that if you want to make this work" Wes said.

"I'm not sure I'm ready for that" Blaine said. "What should I do? I don't want to rush anything but I also don't want to lose him. I need more time to figure out what to do but I have to make sure he doesn't get together with anyone else."

"Like the doctor?" Jeff smiled.

"Exactly" Blaine said.

"Then go to the party with him" Jeff shrugged. "Don't let anything happen. That's so simple."

"I don't know. I don't know those people" Blaine said uncertainly.

"Do you want to guy for yourself or not?" Wes asked.

"I don't know!"

"But you don't want him to be with anyone else" Jeff said.

"That's right" Blaine nodded.

"Go to the party with him" Jeff said. "Keep your eyes on him. Don't let anyone close him."

"I don't think it's a good idea" Wes said carefully. "Look, Blaine, you are my friend. I want the best for you but you can't control another person like that. You have no right to stop him from being happy with somebody else, especially if you can't decide if you want him or not. That's not right."

"I'll go to the party with him" Blaine decided. "I'll go with him and make sure not to leave him alone with Sebastian for a second."

"That's it!" Jeff said.

"It won't end well" Wes muttered. He had a bad feeling that Blaine might screw up everything again. He didn't know Kurt but if he wasn't completely stupid and Wes believed he wasn't, he would figure out what was going on and surely wouldn't let Blaine control him. But Blaine already made his decision and he could be so stubborn if he wanted something. He wouldn't listen to anyone, so there was nothing they could do, just hope that Blaine wouldn't be an idiot.


	15. Chapter 15

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

"I have no idea what's wrong with him."

Kurt walked to the fridge and smiled when his eyes landed on his favorite ice cream. He grabbed it, got himself a spoon and walked back to Finn and Rachel. He decided to spend the afternoon with his family because Blaine was so hard to stand. He was clearly in a bad mood, snapping at Kurt for everything. So Kurt had enough, he had just left, determined not to go back to their place until Blaine came to his senses.

"It's obvious. He's jealous" Rachel smiled.

"Dude, that's my ice cream" Finn muttered as he watched Kurt eat. His stepbrother didn't seem to listen at all.

"It doesn't make any sense" Kurt said as he turned to Rachel. "He keeps telling me that we are just friends. So he has no right to be an asshole."

"And you believe him?" Rachel smiled.

"Do you think he's lying?" Kurt asked.

"Of course" Rachel said. "Come on. He offered you to live with him."

"Because we're having a baby together" Kurt said.

"Or because he wants to keep you close" Rachel said. "Look, men are hard to understand. They don't like talking about their emotions but it's still so easy to read them."

"Really?" Finn asked.

"Yes, really" Rachel said and turned back to Kurt. "Believe me, he's in love with you."

"Well, he should just say that" Kurt said. "I don't like this side of him. It would be so much easier to just tell me how he feels."

"Why don't you talk to him?" Finn offered.

"He would lie" Rachel sighed. "You can be so difficult sometimes."

"I don't understand" Finn muttered.

"What should I do?" Kurt asked. "I have no idea how to act around him. Sometimes he's so sweet but then he gets so cold again. I don't know what to expect from him."

"I think you should sit down and talk honestly" Finn said. "Isn't it the easiest way?"

"Well, it would be, if you could make him talk" Rachel said. "Why don't you go out? You said that you were fine before he knew about the baby."

"I'm not sure he wants that" Kurt said uncertainly. To be honest, he had no idea what to do with Blaine. He was just so confusing. He didn't want to screw up anything. He still liked Blaine and didn't want to lose him.

"Just ask him" Rachel said. "The worst he'll say is no."

"That's what I'm worried about" Kurt said.

"You'll never find out what he wants if you don't try" Rachel said.

"You might be right" Kurt said in the end.

"Of course I am!" Rachel said. "You're going to Sebastian's party together, right?"

"I think so" Kurt said.

"Alright. Stand up" Rachel said and to Kurt's shock, she took the ice cream from him.

"I wanted to eat that" Kurt said.

"Later. We have to get you something fabulous to wear" Rachel said.

Kurt looked at his growing baby bump. It was hard to imagine that he would look fabulous in anything. Although he loved his baby bump, he felt so weird, especially when people stared at him. His body had changed a lot, he still needed time to get used to this new look and figure out what he should wear. But he also loved challenge and believed in himself. Fashion was his life after all. He had to be able to dress up properly or he should quit immediately.

"Okay" he said in the end. "Let's do that."

~ o ~

Blaine was simply annoying. Kurt tried his best to talk to him but the other man didn't seem to see Kurt's true intention at all. It was so disappointing. Kurt really liked what he and Rachel had bought for him for the party. He had gotten himself a few comfortable pants and he chose to wear one of them for the night. He had also bought a longer shirt that mostly covered his baby bump but was so wonderful to wear. He loved his new style. He looked amazing but felt comfortable at the same time, it was all he needed.

Sadly, Blaine didn't seem to notice him at all as they got ready. He was completely silent and only looked at Kurt when the man stopped in front of him, completely satisfied with his look and ready to go.

"You want to come in those?" Blaine asked with wide eyes.

"Of course" Kurt smiled. "My old clothes are so uncomfortable and tight. I got myself a few new pieces. What do you think?"

Blaine really liked the way Kurt looked. He was so beautiful, full of life and those clothes really suited him. Blaine wanted to tell him that he was the most beautiful man of the world but then he stopped. He remembered that it wasn't a date, they were going to a party, probably full of gay men who would notice Kurt, who would probably try to steal him from Blaine and he would have no choice to stop them. He was nowhere as perfect as Kurt. And now that he made everything so complicated, he had to be afraid of losing Kurt. He wasn't stupid, there were a lot of men wandering out there, just waiting for someone like Kurt. Blaine knew deep inside that it was his time to get his head out of ass and tell Kurt how he felt before it was too late, but Blaine was terrified of losing Kurt and when it happened, he could be such an asshole.

"I don't think you should come in those" Blaine said in the end. "You are pregnant, Kurt. You should stop…"

"Stop what?" Kurt asked slowly.

"Looking like this" Blaine said, motioning towards him.

"And how do you think I should look like?" Kurt asked.

"We are going to have a baby. You should just… keep it down" Blaine said.

Kurt closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. Blaine quickly took a step away from him, not knowing what to expect from an angry, pregnant man. But Kurt didn't say anything in the end, he only shook his head and turned to leave.

"Does it mean you'll change clothes?" Blaine asked carefully.

"Oh, yes" Kurt smiled. "I think the shirt I wore on my birthday might still fit. I want to wear that."

Blaine tried to remember what Kurt had looked like that night. He had been sexy but that wasn't surprising. Kurt always looked amazing. Oh, wait a second…

Blaine arrived just in time to see Kurt get into another black shirt. It was a lot tighter than the previous one but it didn't mean he looked bad in it. Not at all. Even with the baby bump, Kurt looked so sexy. Just what Blaine needed.

"I'm ready" Kurt said and to Blaine's horror, he unbuttoned the shirt at his neck, showing off his perfect skin. "Let's go! I don't want to be late."

Blaine wanted to die. He knew why Kurt was doing this and he had to do something, fast, if he didn't want to lose the man.

~ o ~

He was right about the party. There were so many people around, so many _men_ , and Blaine couldn't not notice how they looked at Kurt. How could he? It seemed like everyone stopped for a moment as they arrived and Blaine was pretty sure it wasn't because of him. He berated himself for not paying more attention to his own outfit. Of course Kurt wanted him to be hot. He was pregnant but it didn't make him blind. If it was true what Blaine read about pregnancy, Kurt was just about to reach that period when he always wanted sex. And if he couldn't get it from Blaine then...

"Would you like a drink?" he asked quickly and grabbed Kurt's hand, glaring at the man at the counter who couldn't take his eyes off of Kurt.

"Sure" Kurt smiled, for real this time. Good. It was good. He only had to keep calm and everything would be alright.

He got themselves two glasses of orange juice. Kurt drank that all the time and Blaine started to enjoy it, too. They drank it in the morning, together, while having breakfast. It was nice. And it didn't taste that bad at all. Blaine didn't even miss his morning coffee anymore, he only bought one a few times a week so Kurt had something to smell.

"Kurt! Blaine!"

Blaine's mood was ruined the second Sebastian stepped to them from behind and pulled them close. He was definitely drunk. And too happy.

"Happy birthday!" Kurt said and pulled Sebastian into a hug. "I see you're having a great time."

"You don't seem surprised" Sebastian laughed.

"Should I be?" Kurt laughed with him.

Blaine wasn't that happy at all, especially since Sebastian forgot to get his hands off of Kurt.

"Do you want to dance?" Sebastian asked.

"Sure" Kurt replied.

"Really?" Blaine asked before the two of them could disappear on the dance floor.

"Yeah. Why not?" Kurt frowned.

"I just don't want anything to happen to the baby" Blaine said.

"Oh" Kurt smiled and stepped to him to hug him briefly. "That's so sweet but you have nothing to worry about. I'll keep the little one safe."

"But…"

Kurt was already gone. Blaine sighed and sat back down, his eyes never leaving Kurt and Sebastian. Okay, his friends were right, he was jealous, but what should he do? He was so bad in such things. He had tried to keep the men he had dated and he had failed every single time. He had a bad feeling that it would happen again. Kurt was so not like him. He was so full of life, he was always happy, everyone liked him because he was a good friend. Blaine, on the other hand, wasn't. He was always lonely and only had a few friends, all of them losers like him. He had thought that having Kurt around would solve his problem but he wasn't that sure anymore. He was too scared to date Kurt again but he loved him too much to let go. Maybe Wes was right and he should let Kurt go if he couldn't make him happy. He couldn't fool Kurt forever. Something was broken between them and it was all his fault. Kurt was so distant because Blaine pushed him away. He would lose Kurt if he didn't make up his mind, fast. The only problem was that he had no idea what to do.

He knew exactly why. He had been interested in other men before, he had thought that it was love but now he knew the truth. They hadn't been like Kurt. They hadn't made his heart beat faster the way Kurt did and even if it had hurt to be left alone when they had broken up with him, that was all Blaine had felt. He hadn't been devastated because he lost something important, more like embarrassed of screwing up again. But this thing with Kurt was so complicated. Blaine didn't want to screw up this time. He wanted to do it right, but he was too scared of doing something wrong, so he was scared of making a move at all, unless pushing Kurt away counted. But Kurt was definitely getting tired of it, he was confused and worried about Blaine. He had to do something fast if he didn't want to lose Kurt.

"Hey, dude."

Blaine sighed in relief as Sam and Finn joined him at the table. He was saved from his thoughts.

"What are you doing here?" Blaine asked.

"Sebastian throws huge parties every time. So he invited us, too" Sam explained.

"And where are your girlfriends?" Blaine asked. There was another good thing in living with Kurt. He finally started to get to know his friends. Although he preferred the men's company, the girls seemed so scary most of the time.

"Dancing" Finn shrugged.

"Shouldn't you dance with them?" Blaine frowned.

"I don't dance" Finn said. "I mean, I don't dance if I can help it. I'm a terrible dancer."

"He broke Rachel's nose once" Sam said.

"Seriously?" Blaine asked.

"It was an accident" Finn muttered.

"And what about you?" Blaine asked as he turned to Sam.

"They say that my movements are too erotic" Sam said, leaning closer to Blaine. "Don't listen to them. My movements are perfect. Right?"

"How am I supposed to know?" Blaine asked.

"Dude, you gawk at me all the time" Sam said.

"Because that's my job" Blaine replied.

"Aren't you a photographer?" Finn asked.

"I am!" Blaine said in frustration. Okay, maybe sitting here with the other men wasn't the best decision he could make.

"Does Kurt know about this?" Finn asked.

Blaine so didn't want to go deeper into this conversation. They didn't get it anyway. He decided to check on Kurt, make sure that he was alright.

Blaine froze when he finally spotted Kurt, dancing with Sebastian and a whole bunch of other men. He was having a good time and that wasn't what bothered Blaine but Sebastian, seemingly drunk, with an arm around Kurt. Blaine pressed his lips together in anger and started walking towards them.

"I love this party" Sebastian said as he pulled Kurt away from the others to dance with him.

"I can tell" Kurt laughed. "It's going to hurt tomorrow."

"I took two days off" Sebastian said. "It should be enough."

"If you're lucky" Kurt said. Sebastian reached for his glass but Kurt stopped him. "We should get you a coffee or a glass of water. I don't want you to be sick."

"Honey, I thought you knew me" Sebastian smiled. "I know what I'm doing."

"Really?" Kurt asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Is everything alright?" Blaine asked when he finally reached them.

"Of course" Kurt smiled. "Do you want to dance with us?"

Blaine looked at Sebastian. He so wanted to wipe that smirk off of his face.

"Can we talk, please?" he said in the end as he turned to Kurt. "Outside."

Without waiting for an answer, he grabbed Kurt's arm and started pulling him towards the exit.

"What the hell are you doing?" Kurt asked when they were finally outside and he was able to free his arm.

"I could ask you the same" Blaine replied.

"It's my friend's birthday party. Can't I have some fun?" Kurt asked.

"You mean dance shamelessly with other guys when you're pregnant with my baby?" Blaine asked back.

The door opened again and Finn walked out of the club with a slightly swaying Sebastian.

"Is everything alright?" Finn asked in concern as he joined them. He had seen how Blaine had grabbed Kurt's arm and dragged him out here and he definitely didn't like it.

"Sure. Go back in there, guys" Kurt said calmly.

"Are you sure we can leave you with him?" Finn asked, his eyes never leaving with Blaine.

"Of course. Just go" Kurt said. He didn't want to see his friends fight, especially not for him. He could handle Blaine on his own.

"You touch him like that one more time and I'll break your nose" Finn told Blaine.

"I'm terrified" Blaine said, rolling his eyes.

"I'm serious" Finn said. "No one hurts my brother, you get it?"

"You should listen to him, Blainey" Sebastian said. "If you don't want to spend the rest of the night in the hospital, you better keep your hands off of him."

"Or what?" Blaine replied.

"Just go back. Please" Kurt said quickly. He put his hands on Finn's chest and gently pushed him back before he could do something he would regret later.

"We'll be close" Finn said in the end.

Kurt sighed in relief when Finn and Sebastian turned around and finally walked back inside. He knew that Finn would stay at the door and probably keep his eyes on them but at least they had the privacy they needed, so he could find out what was wrong with Blaine.

"Okay. Tell me" he said, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"Tell you what?" Blaine asked back.

"Why you are acting like an asshole" Kurt said. "This is my friend's birthday party, we're just having fun."

"Oh, yeah, I saw that" Blaine said.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Kurt asked. "I asked you if you wanted to dance with me but you said no. What was I supposed to do? Stay beside you all the time?"

"Well…"

"I'm not your possession, Blaine" Kurt said. "I'm an adult man and I'm free to do whatever I want."

"Is that really what you want to do? Dance with random guys?" Blaine asked.

Kurt finally understood. He should have known, it was so obvious.

"You're jealous" he smiled.

"I'm not" Blaine said quickly.

"Yes, you are" Kurt said as he stepped closer to him. "You're scared of what's going on between us but you can't let me go. You don't want me to dance with anybody else because you're scared of losing me."

"That's so…"

"Tell me it's not true" Kurt cut in.

Blaine wished he could lie better. People did it so easily but he knew himself and he knew Kurt and that he read him like an open book. He also didn't want to embarrass himself but Kurt had him this time. Whatever he said, he wouldn't get out of this as winner.

"You know what? I think I overreacted" Blaine said in the end. "You're right. You're free to do whatever you want."

"So you don't mind if I go back in there and dance with others?" Kurt asked. "Or… would you like to dance with me?"

Oh, yes, he wanted it so badly. But it would also mean that they were back together and Blaine wasn't sure he was ready for that. For now he would be fine only keeping Kurt away from others. The only problem was that Kurt was seemingly done with this play and wanted a final decision.

"I thought so" Kurt said after a while. "You know, Blaine, if you don't think it can work, we should just stay friends. It's fine. But then you have to accept that we are both singles and free to date whoever we want. Okay?"

That wasn't what Blaine wanted at all. Why couldn't everything just stay so simple until he was ready? He didn't want to see Kurt with another guy...

"If that's what you want" he muttered. "I mean… Yes, you're right. If you want to date other guys, just go ahead. I won't stop you."

"Fine" Kurt nodded.

"Fine" Blaine said. "We are adults, we're free to do whatever we want."

"That's right" Kurt said.

"So if I want to drink a beer, you won't stop me either" Blaine continued.

"Go ahead" Kurt said calmly.

"An entire bottle" Blaine added.

"Okay" Kurt nodded.

"Good" Blaine said.

He didn't move. He stayed there frozen, staring into Kurt's eyes. He knew that it was wrong, that Kurt would get the truth out of him in no time, so he should go back in there before it happened but he couldn't make himself move. He didn't want to do any of those things. He didn't want to drink and he definitely didn't want to see other men. But he also didn't want to seem weak.

"You know, if you're trying to make a dramatic exit, I think this would be your moment" Kurt said after a while. He seemed amused for some reason.

Blaine's face was deep red at that moment. This conversation could have turned a very different way, he certainly didn't expect Kurt to react like this. Knowing that it was better not to say anything, Blaine simply walked back inside, muttering something to himself Kurt didn't understand.

Kurt sighed and leaned against the wall as he watched Blaine, unable to hide his smile. Blaine could say whatever he wanted, it was so easy to read him. Kurt started to learn how to handle him and the most important, he finally understood what Blaine wanted. He only didn't know how to make Blaine see it. He had a feeling that it would be hard.

"We still love your daddy, right?" he said as he put a hand on his stomach. "Yes, he can be an idiot sometimes but he's cute, don't you think?"

He didn't get an answer that night but he knew that it was just the matter of time. A week or a little more and he would finally be able to feel his child. He couldn't wait for that.


	16. Chapter 16

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Well, it's been a month... I didn't mean to take such a long break, especially not without a word, so I owe you an apology. I know that some of you were worried about me. I'm still alive, just really-really busy with all the things I have to work on, like dissertation, papers, presentations, etc. I didn't find the energy to work on anything else when I spent most of my days in front of my laptop, writing. I guess it was good for me because now it feels so much better to be back.**

 **I really don't want to hold you up any longer, so enjoy!**

As Kurt expected, Blaine didn't do anything scandalous at the party after their conversation. He remained silent for a while, he only kept watching Kurt and his friends as they danced and chatted, but seemed to come to his senses in the end and even danced with Kurt before they went home. It seemed like they were doing fine again and Kurt was really happy they managed to live together without problem. He really liked Blaine and although he was cute when he was jealous, Kurt would have liked him a lot better if Blaine just told him how he felt. He wanted to be with Blaine, not like now, completely. He wanted to get back what they had had before. Too bad Blaine didn't seem to notice that he only hurt Kurt with his behavior. Kurt knew he had to figure out what to do because Blaine wouldn't make a move on his own.

Blaine seemed to love everything baby-related, so Kurt tried to inform him about every little sign. Blaine was happy when Kurt told him about his newest cravings, when he discussed the details of the nursery with him and especially when they went shopping for the baby. Blaine seemed to love baby clothes just as much as Kurt did. As the days passed, Kurt noticed something new. It didn't seem important at first, it was just a small movement in his abdomen, he didn't think it was something he should care about. But one night when he woke up and tried to figure out what disturbed him in his sleep, he realized that it wasn't something he should ignore. Maybe because he was lying on his back, he could feel it a lot stronger than before. And he finally realized what it was.

"Blaine!" Kurt shouted as he jumped out of the bed and ran to the door. "Blaine, you have to wake up!"

He heard a low moan and stormed into Blaine's room just as the man opened his eyes. He looked around in confusion as if he didn't know where he was, until his eyes landed on a frantic Kurt and he was fully awake in a second.

"What's wrong?" Blaine asked as he jumped out of the bed and rushed to Kurt. He put an arm around him and led him to the bed. "Is something wrong with the baby? Should I call Sebastian? Do you need…"

"Blaine, stop" Kurt smiled. "It's the baby but nothing is wrong with it."

Blaine blinked in confusion. And then again. He had no idea what Kurt was doing in his room then.

"I don't get it" he said honestly.

"The baby" Kurt smiled. "The baby's moving."

Blaine needed about a minute to understand it. He kept staring at Kurt in complete silence and Kurt was afraid that he somehow managed to fall back asleep, but then Blaine cried out happily and pulled him into his arms.

"You can feel the baby!" he said.

"Yes, I do" Kurt smiled. "I think I felt it before but I wasn't sure what it was."

"What is it like?" Blaine asked.

"Weird" Kurt said honestly. "It's a little… scary, I think. There's another human being in me, can you believe it?"

"Well, yeah" Blaine said. "That's the point of pregnancy. That you get a little human in the end."

Kurt only rolled his eyes. As if he didn't know what would happen when the pregnancy was over.

"So it's weird?" Blaine asked.

"Imagine that you feel something move in your abdomen and you know that it's not you" Kurt said.

Blaine tried to imagine what it was like.

"It's weird" he said in the end. "I mean… It's a real baby. It's… It's…"

"Real?" Kurt offered.

"Exactly" Blaine nodded. It was too early to express his feelings properly.

"I can't believe I can feel the baby" Kurt laughed. "It changes everything! Now I don't have to be worried about it all the time because I know that our child is fine."

Blaine smiled. Our child… It seemed so nice. And Kurt was perfectly right. Now that Kurt felt the baby move, they didn't have to be worried all the time. The baby was fine. Nothing would happen to it, they would get over the rest of the pregnancy in no time and welcome their child soon. Blaine couldn't wait for that. It would be amazing. He imagined that he pulled the baby into his arms, the baby he imagined as the little version of Kurt, a beautiful little person they would love so much. Yes, he definitely wanted to get there as soon as possible. But he had to be patient for a few more months. Until then… well, maybe he should figure out what to do with their relationship. He still couldn't decide what he wanted. Sometimes it was so easy with Kurt but then everything changed so quickly and they were fighting again. He didn't want to fight. He wanted to be in love and enjoy all those wonderful things with someone.

Blaine sighed, pushing the thought to the back of his mind. Now wasn't the time to think about them. It was a happy moment, they should just enjoy it.

~ o ~

Blaine met his friends that Friday again. He wanted to go on a walk with Kurt but he wasn't feeling well. He didn't want to leave Kurt, of course, but the man practically kicked him out of the apartment, telling him that he should enjoy this remaining time to have fun before the baby's birth. Kurt seemed to come to the idea that Blaine would leave him alone with the newborn a lot more often than usually and it caused some more heated conversations. Blaine didn't want to have one again, so he simply agreed to go out for a while and meet his friends while he still could.

Sitting in their usual place, knowing that Kurt was all alone was depressing. It wasn't like Blaine wanted another fight with the pregnant man, not at all, but it was so sad that Kurt spent the Saturday night at home, probably watching movies and eating ice cream, when Blaine was here with his friends. He should have asked Kurt to come with him… It wasn't like he wanted to hide him forever, his friends had to meet him eventually, preferably before the baby's birth. Whatever happened to them, they would be a family forever. So Blaine made himself a mental note to ask Kurt to join him the next time. Who knew, maybe he would like his friends. Okay, that wasn't too easy to believe but they had to try.

"I see you survived that party" Wes smiled at his friend.

"Of course" Blaine shrugged.

"You didn't cause a scene, right?" Wes asked.

Blaine only sighed. He had been an idiot, he should be glad that Kurt hadn't let his stepbrother break his nose. He had no idea what had happened at the party. He knew that he and Kurt weren't together and he was free to do whatever he wanted, he had agreed in that after all, but seeing Kurt with another guy, that he could be happy with somebody else...

"What did you do?" Wes asked with wide eyes.

"Nothing" Blaine said.

"Oh, yes, you did" Jeff smiled. "Come on. I want to hear it."

Blaine took a deep breath and told his friends everything about Sebastian's party. They were both silent for a while and Blaine hoped they understood him. Well, right until he finished talking.

"Are you out of your mind?" Wes asked.

"You should leave the bitch" Jeff said at the same time.

"Excuse me?" Wes asked as he turned to him.

"Did you hear him? The guy is pregnant with Blaine's child and he's dancing with another men" Jeff said.

"I don't see why he couldn't do that" Wes said. "You aren't together."

"But he's pregnant with my baby!" Blaine said.

"And then what? He deserves to be happy, too, and if you don't want to be with him, you should just let him do whatever he wants. Yes, that includes meeting other men" Wes said. "You are an asshole, by the way."

"Why?" Blaine asked.

"Did you really grab his arm and drag him out of the club?" Wes asked.

"Yes?" Blaine asked in a small voice.

"You should have let his stepbrother hit you. You would have deserved it" Wes said.

"What?" Blaine asked.

"You can't hurt a pregnant man, especially not the one who's pregnant with your child" Wes said. "If I were you, I would buy him a bouquet of flowers and beg for his forgiveness."

"I-I don't think he's angry with me" Blaine said.

"He still deserves an apology" Wes said.

"Why?" Jeff asked.

"Shut up, you know nothing" Wes quickly silenced him. "Seriously, Blaine you have to decide what you want from this guy. You can't fool him forever. Do you want to be with him or not?"

Blaine looked away. He had thought that this would be a nice, easy night, without conversations like this. But it looked like Wes couldn't stop talking about him and Kurt. It was annoying most of the time but it also made Blaine think about themselves a lot more. Who knew, maybe Wes was right and he should finally decide what he wanted. As if it was so easy...

"I already told you. I have no idea what I want" Blaine said in the end.

"That's stupid" Wes said.

"Look, it's not that easy…"

"Yes, it is" Wes said seriously. "Do you want him or not?"

"I-I don't know" Blaine said. "It's not that easy. Yes, I like him but he lied to me, he..."

"I thought you forgave him for that" Wes said.

"What if it happens again?" Blaine asked. "I don't want to be together with him again, fall in love with him and then let him break my heart. It's just…"

"As I said, it's stupid" Wes said. "I have no idea why you're playing with him but you should stop. You let so many guys fool you but you always forgave them. You fought for them so hard, even when they made it clear that they wanted nothing from you anymore. Now here you are, you finally met a guy who might make you happy and you keep pushing him away. You shouldn't be so stubborn. You should talk to him about your situation before it's too late."

"I think he's wrong" Jeff said. "He lied to you once, he might do that again. I don't say you shouldn't be friends, you're going to have a baby together after all, but you deserve so much better."

"It's understandable that you have fights" Wes said. "Every couple has. You shouldn't give up on him just because it's hard right now. This is a really hard period for him, it's understandable that he's sensitive. But it doesn't last forever."

"It's going to be a lot worse after the baby's birth" Jeff said. "People go insane from having children, especially when they want them so badly that they're willing to lie to a stranger to get his sperms. Believe me, this won't end well. You should run now that you can."

Blaine buried his face into his palms. His friends weren't helping at all, they only made everything more complicated. It was so hard for him right now. One day was magical, they were happy for their baby, they stayed up late only to talk about the baby, and then they wake up the next morning and fight about the smallest things. Blaine had never had a serious relationship before, let alone lived together with somebody else, so he had no idea if it was normal or it was the sign that they weren't meant to be together. God, why was it so hard? He wanted nothing but to get back what he and Kurt had had at the beginning, when everything had been so simple and magical.

~ o ~

Kurt was pretty sure that he and Blaine were getting closer to each other. They spent a lot more time together, mostly because of the baby but it didn't matter. It only mattered that Blaine wanted to be with him. Okay, he didn't say it like that but Kurt knew him, he could read Blaine and it was clear that they were doing a lot better than before. Maybe they had fights sometimes but it was natural. Every couple had fights, sometimes over the smallest things but they survived, together. They could discuss their disagreements, and it meant that their relationship could work. He also fought his hormones and tried to be more patient and understanding. He asked Blaine about his days, even when he was so exhausted after work that he almost collapsed, he cooked themselves dinner, helped Blaine pick out his clothes for work, and talked to him a lot more than before. He also told Blaine to go out with his friends and have fun because they wouldn't be able to go out so often after the baby's birth. He understood that Blaine needed his friends just as Kurt needed his own, and he believed that it would help on the two of them, so he sacrificed his own Saturday night, bit his tongue and smiled as Blaine left the house.

To be honest, he felt so alone without Blaine. The apartment was too quiet and he had nothing to do. Sure, he had his laptop, he could watch as many movies as he wanted and he could enjoy his baby's movements, something that made him so happy, but he was still alone and it felt so wrong. He was getting impatient. Blaine was seemingly fine with what they had and didn't look like he wanted to make a move. It meant that Kurt had to do something because they couldn't stay like this forever, they couldn't, but he was scared of coming up with the topic. What if he was wrong and Blaine wanted nothing from him?

"Are you eating ice cream again?" Mercedes asked as she smiled at Kurt through the screen.

Santana and Brittany weren't available that night but since Sam and Finn both worked, Kurt had Mercedes and Rachel to talk to. He didn't want to ask them to leave everything behind and come over, so he didn't have to be alone, but they had Internet connection, so they could have a video call and it was almost the same. Almost.

Kurt looked at the bowl in his hands and blushed. He ate a lot more ice cream than he was supposed to but he couldn't help it. It was so delicious, it made the baby a lot more active and was the best solution for nausea, something that still bothered him. Blaine also bought him every kind Kurt liked and it was nearly impossible to say no when their fridge was full of things Kurt liked. It wasn't like he would gain too much weight, he was careful. Or at least he tried to be.

"Just a little" he said.

"Sure" Rachel smiled. "You'll be fat if you aren't careful with that."

"It's not that much" Kurt said.

"Of course" Rachel said. "So why are you depressed?"

"I miss Blaine" Kurt muttered.

"Isn't he there?" Mercedes asked.

"No, he's with his friends" Kurt said.

"I can't believe he left you alone" Mercedes shook her head. "He should be with you and the baby and not fool around with other guys."

"Who said anything about other guys?" Kurt asked. "Wait, you think that he's with somebody else? God, I'm so stupid. I told him to go out but I didn't think he would meet somebody else. It's…"

"Take a deep breath and calm down" Rachel said. "He's with his friends. I don't think you have to worry about him. It's not like he would get together with anyone but you."

"How do you know?" Kurt frowned.

"I saw him, Kurt" Rachel said. "He was so jealous when he saw you dance with Sebastian."

"Yeah, I guess he was" Kurt said.

"See? You have nothing to worry about" Rachel shrugged.

"She means you don't have to worry that he might leave you for somebody else" Mercedes said. "Although I would be careful with him. We all saw what he did to you at the party."

"It was nothing" Kurt said easily.

"Seriously?" Mercedes asked with a raised eyebrow.

"He was just worried about the baby" Kurt said.

"Worried or not, he can't hurt a pregnant man, especially not the father of his baby" Mercedes said.

"I took care of that" Kurt said. "Don't worry, we are fine."

"I just don't want you to get hurt" Mercedes said.

"Mercedes, I think they can solve their problems without us" Rachel said. "They are adults. They don't need our help to get over their disagreements."

Mercedes didn't seem as convinced as Rachel but she said nothing. Kurt still saw that she wasn't entirely sure that Blaine was the best for Kurt.

"We'll be fine" Kurt said. "He can be really sweet. You should have seen him the other day. I think we're going to get back together soon."

"That's amazing, Kurt!" Rachel said happily.

Kurt jumped when he heard the soft click as the door was unlocked from the other side.

"I have to go" he said quickly. "He's here."

"Good luck" Rachel winked.

He quickly put down his laptop, get rid of the rest of the ice cream and sat up straight, with a warm smile on his face as Blaine stepped inside.

"Hey" Kurt greeted him. "How was your night?"

"Busy" Blaine said. He walked to Kurt and sat down beside him.

"I hope you didn't do anything stupid" Kurt smiled.

"Oh, I wasn't with my friend too much. They had leave earlier, so I was left alone."

Kurt tried his best not to show how he felt. So Blaine stayed away long after his friends were gone. He didn't want to come back to him. But why?

"Do you remember the blond guy from the coffee shop? Jack?" Blaine asked.

"Yes?" Kurt said carefully. He had a bad feeling that he wouldn't like what Blaine wanted to say.

"He was there and saw that I was alone, so he bought me a drink" Blaine said. "It was funny because he didn't know that I don't drink, so I brought him back the drink and told him that I couldn't accept it. Guess what happened then?"

"You said goodbye and came home?" Kurt said hopefully.

"No, that would have been rude" Blaine said. "We started talking and it turned out that he's a really nice guy. Sadly, he couldn't stay any longer because he has to work tomorrow but we agreed that we would meet at the coffee shop anyway, so…"

It was like being stabbed in the heart over and over again. Kurt wasn't sure what he wanted, if he wanted to yell or cry but whatever he did, he shouldn't show Blaine how disappointed he was.

"So you want to date him?" So much for not being disappointed.

"It's not a date, just…"

Kurt didn't want to hear more. He pushed himself up from the couch and walked straight to his door.

"Kurt, what's wrong?" Blaine asked.

"I'm tired" Kurt said quickly. He knew that he couldn't stop himself from crying and he had to get out of here before it happened.

"But…"

"Good night, Blaine."

He quickly locked the door behind him, making sure Blaine couldn't join him, and walked to the bed. He barely reached it before he collapsed, feeling so tired and heartbroken. And he was crying. It didn't make him feel better at all, on the contrary, it only made him more nauseous, but he didn't care. It was so not fair. He gave Blaine everything he could and that was what he got in return? Did Blaine like him at all? Maybe he had been wrong about them so far. Maybe Blaine didn't want anything from him and only let him live here because of the baby. Maybe Kurt didn't matter at all, he was just a friend Blaine could talk to until he found somebody else. Like Jack from the coffee shop who was hot and nice and not pregnant and everything Kurt couldn't be. He lost. He had waited too long and now it was too late. Blaine would start dating that guy, he would fall in love with him, they would get married and… God, what if they wanted to raise the baby together? Would he lose everything?

Kurt didn't sleep much that night. For the first time in his life, he was scared of what the morning would bring.


	17. Chapter 17

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter. I had so much fun while writing this section of the story. I hope you like it, too.**

Kurt Hummel was a strong man. No matter how badly life treated him, he always stood up and moved forward. He had survived so many things in his life. He had survived losing his mom, almost losing his father, twice, to be exact, he had survived bullying at school, being treated like shit at his first workplace, losing his home, also twice, and so much more. But Kurt Hummel never gave up. And he had to let Blaine Anderson know that.

Yes, Kurt had broken down the previous night but it didn't mean he would give up so easily. Oh, no. Blaine could have lied as much as he wanted, Kurt knew him. Okay, Jack from the coffee shop was hot but he could be, too. Even if he was pregnant and his baby bump was already so huge that he barely fitted anything anymore. He lived for fashion after all, he would figure out what to do.

But first he had to know what was going on between Blaine and Jack and the best way to figure out was to follow Blaine and see how things worked between him and coffee guy. So Kurt called for help that morning and they went to the coffee shop to spy on Blaine.

"I still don't get it" Finn said as they stepped inside and quickly went to a free table, far enough from the counter but close enough to see everything. He rubbed his tired eyes when they sat down. It was Sunday after all and way too early to be anywhere but in bed. Unfortunately, Kurt didn't give him a choice.

"It's not that hard, Finn" Kurt rolled his eyes. "I have to figure out what's going on with them."

"I don't understand" Finn said. "I thought he was jealous."

"Of course he was jealous. He still is" Kurt said. "It's a game. He wants me to believe that he likes the guy, so I'll be jealous. But I'm not an idiot."

"Why would he do that?" Finn asked in confusion.

"Because he's scared of admitting his feelings. But I won't let him play with me anymore" Kurt said determinedly.

"Just leave him, Kurt" Finn said. "You do remember how he acted in the club, right? I don't think that's what you need right now."

"I need my baby's father back" Kurt said.

"The baby's father or the guy you like?" Finn asked.

Okay, he had chosen the wrong words but Finn should have known why he needed Blaine so much, right?

"Look, that's the guy" Kurt said.

"The blonde?" Finn asked and stood up to take a better look.

Kurt grabbed his arm and pulled him back down.

"What…"

"We're spying on them. They can't figure out that we're here" Kurt hissed. "God, you're so slow. And why are you so tall? They'll notice you."

He quickly put up his sunglasses and leaned closer to take a better look of Blaine and coffee guy. Okay, mostly Blaine. He looked so hot in those pants. Kurt really liked his ass in those pants. Even if he was wearing sunglasses, the sight was perfect.

"Can we have a cup of coffee?" Finn asked after a while. He was so tired…

"Later" Kurt said. "Look. They are laughing."

"Is that a problem?" Finn asked.

"Yes, it is" Kurt said. He didn't want Blaine to be happy with somebody else. He was supposed to be happy with Kurt.

"Well, that couldn't be a good joke because Blaine's already leaving" Finn commented as he watched Blaine turn around.

"Duck!" Kurt said suddenly and pushed him down under the table.

"Kurt, what…"

"Shut up" Kurt said.

They stayed under the table for a while, probably way after Blaine was gone, but Kurt didn't want to risk anything. It was Finn who moved in the end, tired of hiding under the table any more.

"He's gone" Finn said.

"Yes, he is" Kurt sighed. It was close. He couldn't let Blaine see him. He would figure out what was going on.

"Can I have a coffee now?" Finn asked.

"Sure" Kurt said. "I need something to eat, too. I'm starving."

He stood up and walked to the counter. He gave the barista his warmest smile, knowing that he couldn't do anything suspicious.

"Hey, Jack. It's Jack, right?" he asked.

"Yes" the guy nodded.

"I would like a coffee for my brother here and a slice of cheesecake" Kurt said.

"What kind of coffee?" the guy asked.

"Whatever you have" Kurt said before Finn had a chance to talk. "I know it's weird but I just realized that I come here every single day and we never talk."

"Uhm… yeah, I know" Jack said.

"You seem like a nice guy" Kurt said. "And I have to tell you, you are so lucky. Men love blond hair, it's so hot. I'm pretty sure people flirt with you all the time."

"I can't say that" Jack said slowly. He had no idea why Kurt said those things.

"But there's surely someone in your life… A boyfriend, maybe" Kurt continued.

"Aren't you Blaine's roommate?" Jack asked suddenly.

"Excuse me?" Kurt frowned.

"Blaine. You've just missed him. It's weird, actually. He said that you were home. He even bought you a coffee" Jack said.

Oh, shit. Of course Blaine had bought him a coffee, like every single morning. Even if things weren't always the best between them, Blaine knew that Kurt wasn't comfortable around people when it was about his weird not-coffee-drinking habit. He wasn't pregnant enough to be obvious for everyone, people only thought that he was weird, they didn't know that he couldn't actually drink his coffee because he was pregnant and only bought one because he needed its scent. And now Blaine was on his way home… he would get there before Kurt and Kurt had no idea how to explain where he had been. Blaine couldn't find out that he had been stalking on him.

"I have to go" he said quickly as he turned to Finn.

"But what about…" Finn motioned towards the coffee and cake on the counter.

"You can have mine, too" Kurt said. "I'll call you."

"But…"

Kurt was gone before Finn could say more.

"He's weird, isn't he?" Jack asked when Kurt was gone.

"You have no idea" Finn sighed as he reached for his coffee. A least he had a slice of cheesecake just for himself. He deserved it after such an eventful morning.

~ o ~

Blaine walked into his apartment and called out for Kurt. He got no answer. It was weird. He walked into Kurt's room but found it completely empty, just like the other rooms. It was definitely weird. Kurt was usually too tired to wake up early and he definitely didn't leave the apartment without his morning rituals, including not-having coffee with Blaine. It was something they did together every day. But Kurt was gone… Where could he be?

Blaine was about to call Kurt when the man walked through the door, breathing heavily. Blaine left the coffees on the table and quickly walked to him.

"Are you alright?" he asked in concern.

"Sure. Just… Oh, my God. I can't breath" Kurt said. Blaine put an arm around him and helped him walk to the couch.

Blaine watched Kurt in worry. The man took deep breaths and closed his eyes. His hand was resting on his baby bump and Blaine was scared that Kurt had done something stupid and now something was wrong with the baby.

"Where have you been?" he asked.

"I… Uhm… I was jogging" Kurt said. He couldn't find a better explanation.

"Are you out of your mind? You're pregnant!" Blaine gasped.

"Hey, calm down. I'm fine" Kurt said. "I really needed some fresh air."

"So you decided to go out all alone? Don't you think it's crazy? What if something had happened to the baby?" Blaine asked.

"The baby is fine. Besides, I wasn't alone" Kurt said.

Kurt looked up just in time to see the jealousy in Blaine's eyes. Oh, that was good. Maybe he was right and Blaine only wanted to make him jealous. Well, Kurt Hummel wasn't a stupid man.

"That's right. I work out with my friend Fi- I mean, Finchel" Kurt said quickly.

"Finchel?" Blaine asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, Finchel" Kurt said, a lot more confidently this time. Okay, he could have chosen any male name but he just couldn't come up with one. He wasn't good in lies and this one was as close to the truth as possible. "Don't look at me like this. It's a real name. A perfectly real name. In Finland. Because my friend Finchel comes from Finland. It's a quite common name there."

"Why don't I know this friend of yours?" Blaine asked.

"Because we only met a few weeks ago" Kurt said, a new idea forming in his mind. "But he's really sweet. He understands what I'm going through and what I need. He also accepts me like this. He asked me out on a date. I think I might say yes. He's a nice guy."

Blaine only stared at him. He tried to say something, really, but Kurt's words shocked him. He only wanted to tell Kurt that he couldn't go out with another guy. No, he couldn't go out with anybody but him. But then he remembered that he had been the one who had asked out another man and he had no right to tell Kurt what to do. Kurt saw that, too, and he almost smiled. Blaine might have tried to hide his feelings but Kurt read him so easily.

"I guess it's not a problem. We're just friends" Kurt shrugged.

"Of course" Blaine said quietly. He had to get out of there. "Uhm… If you excuse me…"

He quickly went back into his room before Kurt could figure out what was going on in his mind. It was too late, though. Kurt already got what he wanted and if he played things right, Blaine would admit his feelings soon and there would be no one to step between them anymore.

~ o ~

It had been such a horrible idea. Ever since he had started to talk to Jack, Blaine had known that it was stupid and definitely not what he wanted. He had no idea why he had gotten into this at all. Jack was a nice guy but that was all. He wasn't the one who made his heart beat faster but it had felt so good to have someone to talk to who wasn't the hormonal father of his child. Besides, Blaine was pretty sure that Kurt would be jealous and he thought it would be a good thing for some reason. He couldn't even explain why. He had hurt Kurt so badly the other night and it had made him feel so bad after that. He had heard Kurt cry and he had almost cried with him. It had been so sad. He had been thinking about telling Kurt the truth and giving themselves another chance since it seemed like a good choice, he couldn't stop thinking about Kurt after all, so it could only mean that he was still in love with him, but then Kurt told him that he might have someone else in his life and it was just too much for Blaine. Okay, he had been stupid. He had thought that now that Kurt was pregnant, he was off the market, that no one would be interested in him. It was so stupid. Kurt was hot, of course men liked him. The pregnancy only made him look better than before. And now he would date that guy… Finchel. It was such a stupid name. It had to be a stupid guy. Stupid, stupid Finchel who wanted to take his family away from him. But what should he do now?

Probably pay attention, he reminded himself. He was in a restaurant and he wasn't alone, no matter how easy it was to forget that Jack was sitting on the other side of the table. Jack who was so quiet for some reason.

"Are you alright?" Jack asked.

"Sure" Blaine smiled. "I'm sorry. I zoomed out a bit."

"I see" Jack smiled. "Are you sure you're alright?"

Honestly, he wasn't. He had left Kurt all alone for the night and now he felt so bad. He knew that Kurt hated being alone in the apartment, especially on Saturday when all of his friends were busy and he felt like he was left out of everything because of his pregnancy. God, Blaine was so cruel. He should have known that the timing wasn't right. Kurt needed him after all.

"I'm worried about Kurt" Blaine said.

"Your roommate?" Jack asked.

"Yeah" Blaine said. "He's having a hard time. I'm not sure it was a good idea to leave him alone."

"Do you want to go home?" Jack asked. He didn't seem disappointed but he surely wasn't too pleased that Blaine couldn't stop thinking about another man when he was with him on a date.

"No, no, he's fine" Blaine said with a forced smile. "I think I'm just overreacting. It's not like he can't be left alone. He's a big boy."

The man who was pregnant with his child, to be exact. Who had crazy ideas like jogging and who knew what else that could endanger their child's life. It could be even worse, Kurt could spend the whole night on the couch, watching one of those sappy movies, eating ice cream and crying his heart out. Now Blaine was getting really worried. So worried that he didn't even hear Jack anymore.

~ o ~

Blaine was right about Kurt sitting on the couch with his favorite ice cream but he wasn't paying attention to the movie playing in the background at all. He was waiting for a very important phone call. Blaine was stupid if he thought Kurt would just sit back and wait for him to do something. Okay, he wanted to make Blaine believe that that was what he did but Blaine didn't have to know. He would turn things so that Blaine came to him, begging for his forgiveness. It was just the matter. Of time. But first he had to make sure he was right about Blaine's feelings…

He checked his phone again. Nothing. He was getting impatient. The others knew how important this call was for him. What was taking them so long? It wasn't like Kurt had given them a hard task…

Losing his patience, he grabbed his phone and dialed the familiar number. He waited for a few long seconds but since he didn't get an answer, he tried the other one. And then...

"Hello?"

"What's taking you so long?" Kurt asked, a little louder than he wanted.

"Why are you so angry?"

"Because you were supposed to keep me informed, Finn" Kurt said.

It had been his idea to send Rachel and Finn after Blaine to keep an eye on him. He couldn't go there himself after all, Blaine would think that he was stalking him. If he bumped into his friends, on the other hand… They knew what they had to say. Finn and Rachel were a couple after all, they could have a nice dinner in the same restaurant, it was just a coincidence that they ended up right there when Blaine was there on a date, too. At least that was what they would say if they had to.

"What do you want to know?" Finn asked.

"Everything" Kurt said. "What are they doing?"

"Eating, mostly" Finn said.

"Are they flirting with each other?" Kurt asked.

"I don't know" Finn said.

"Are they doing anything out of order?" Kurt asked, losing his patience.

"I don't think so" Finn said uncertainly. "I mean, this is a restaurant. What are they supposed to do?"

Kurt closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. He really didn't want to say anything to hurt Finn.

"Give me Rachel" he said in the end.

"Fine" Finn said. His voice was filled with relief.

"I'm here" Rachel said a few seconds later. "It's so exciting! I've never spied on anyone before."

"Rachel, you are my only source of information. Please, don't let me down" Kurt said and took a deep breath before continuing. "I need to know everything, okay?"

"Okay. I'm ready" Rachel said.

"Physical contact?" Kurt asked.

"Zero" Rachel answered quickly.

"Affection?" Kurt asked.

"Zero. Okay, maybe one" Rachel said.

"Of five or ten?"

"Is it really important?"

"Yes, it is!"

"Okay, so the guy seemed to be interested in Blaine but he only seems to be bored now" Rachel said.

"Bored?" Kurt asked hopefully.

"I don't think Blaine's paying attention at all" Rachel said.

"So he's thinking about somebody else" Kurt smiled.

"How do you know that?" Kurt heard Finn ask.

"Oh, honey. You are a man. Of course you don't understand" Rachel sighed. "I don't want to give you false hope but I don't think you should worry. Blaine definitely doesn't like this guy."

"That's all I need to know" Kurt smiled.

He said goodbye and disconnected the call. He kept staring at his phone for a while, unable to stop smiling. Blaine might have tried to make him jealous but it wasn't that easy to fool Kurt. And now that he knew for sure that Blaine was only lying to him, it was time to teach him a lesson. Kurt already knew what he had to do.

A soft movement in his abdomen brought him out of his thoughts. He had forgotten about his ice cream and now the baby was complaining. Kurt laughed as he put a hand on his baby bump and reached for the ice cream again.

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I know you need your ice cream but this call was really important" he said. "I'm getting daddy back."

Oh, yes. It was just the matter of time and Blaine would give up. He would realize that it was pointless to play this game with Kurt because he had no chance to win. Kurt Hummel always got what he wanted and he wanted Blaine back. He also wanted Blaine to admit his feelings. Kurt wouldn't be the one who made the first step, not after this game of Blaine. He could be patient. He could also make Blaine believe that it was him who was in control.

"Patience, my dear" Kurt smiled. "Daddy might be a little slow but I'll make sure he comes to his senses."

Soon. Really soon.


	18. Chapter 18

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Thank you so much for reading and reviewing this story!**

Kurt was impatient. He knew deep inside that he was doing the right thing and it was just the matter of time and Blaine would come to his senses, so they would have a chance to be happy again. But when would it happen? He wanted it immediately. He didn't want to play anymore, he wanted to shake Blaine's shoulders and tell him to wake up and stop this nonsense. It wasn't too hard to realize that Blaine was lying about his 'relationship' with Jack. He barely talked to the other man, only when Kurt was around, and those conversations were nothing like what they had had before Kurt had told him the news about the baby. Blaine tried really hard to make Kurt believe in his lies but he couldn't fool the man. Blaine didn't care about Jack, he didn't consider him more than a friend and it should have helped Kurt calm his nerves. Only he wasn't patient enough to wait for Blaine to admit his feelings.

He was also frustrated. Blaine had told him that they were fine, that he wasn't angry with Kurt anymore, but if it wasn't true, why did he lie? It would have been so much easier to work on their relationship and get over their problems before the baby arrived. Kurt didn't want to raise his child in such a horrible environment. The baby needed peace, and most importantly both of their parents, who were able to be honest with each other.

And Kurt needed his man… He would never tell Blaine because he felt ashamed, but now that the morning sickness was gone and he felt so energetic, he needed something more than ice cream to make him happy. Sex, to be exact. He was horny all the time and having Blaine around only made it stronger. He found himself daydreaming about the two of them more and more and he could barely hold himself back when Blaine was so close. It was unbearable. Especially when Blaine was doing this...

"Is it better?" Blaine asked while rubbing Kurt's back.

Kurt suppressed a moan and simply nodded. Yes, it was amazing. Everything Blaine did was amazing. Especially his gentle hands on his shoulders...

"It must be really hard for you" Blaine said conversationally. "I'm sorry I can't help you more."

"It's fine" Kurt said. He played with the thought of turning around and kissing Blaine but he knew that he had to be patient. He had to get someone out of the picture first. "So how's Jack doing?"

"Jack?" Blaine asked in surprise.

"Your boyfriend" Kurt said, unable to keep the jealousy out of his words.

Blaine smiled and put his hands on Kurt's shoulders again.

"He's great" he said.

Kurt pressed his lips together in anger and took a deep breath before saying anything again.

"You don't spend too much time together" he pointed out. "I don't even hear you talk."

"Well… He's busy" Blaine said.

"I'm sure he is" Kurt said. "Will you go on a date with him again?"

Blaine was silent for a while as if he didn't know what to say. Kurt smiled. Blaine could be so stupid sometimes.

"Sure" Blaine said in the end.

"That wasn't too convincing" Kurt smiled.

"Yes, I-I want to go on a date with him" Blaine said.

Silence, again. Kurt kept his mouth shut for a little while before asking Blaine the most important question.

"Does he know about us?"

Blaine was so surprised by the question that he froze for a few moments. Kurt turned around to face him but Blaine turned his head away.

"I guess he doesn't" he said in the end.

"I just… It's complicated" Blaine said.

"Yes, it is" Kurt said before he could stop himself. "Now you finally understand why it was so hard to tell you."

Blaine opened his mouth to say something but Kurt didn't wait for his reply. He didn't want to hear. He knew very well that Blaine was still angry with him. Not like before but he couldn't trust him either. Honestly, he wasn't in the mood to tell Blaine how sorry he was, he had done that several times. No, he wouldn't take that step. He would wait for Blaine to be ready. It didn't mean he should just wait, only that he had to be careful. Blaine could never figure out what Kurt was doing behind his back.

~ o ~

The opportunity came a few days later when Blaine finally gathered his courage and stupidly asked Jack to come over before their next date. He let Kurt know that the man would be there in the evening and asked Kurt if he could avoid every kind of conversations including their relationship.

"So you will just sit there and act like you're just his roommate?" Santana asked.

Kurt met the girls that afternoon to ask for their help. He had his own crazy idea of what he should do but he knew that he wasn't completely sane, so it was better to ask for his friends' help before he did something very bad.

"I never said that" Kurt answered.

"It's insane" Rachel said. "I was there when Blaine took that guy out on a date the last time. Believe me, there's nothing between the two of them."

"That's what I say, too" Kurt said. "Blaine barely talks to him and their conversations are so…"

"Friendly?" Mercedes asked.

"Boring" Kurt said in the end. "It seems like Blaine is bored of the guy. He asks the same stupid questions every time and then comes up with the same excuse why he can't talk to Jack more. He's so not like this when he's in love."

"Because you know him so much" Santana smiled.

"Hey, I was there, remember?" Kurt glared at her. "Blaine can be so romantic. He's… He's wonderful."

"Especially when he isn't dating other guys" Santana pointed out.

"He only wants to make me jealous" Kurt said.

"Why do you think so?" Mercedes asked.

"He still loves me" Kurt said confidently. "He just… You know. He's a man."

"I don't get it" Mercedes said in confusion.

"He wants my attention" Kurt explained. "He knows how it makes me feel to see him with another guy, at least he thinks he knows. But I'm cleverer. I can see through his play, so it doesn't bother me anymore."

"I guess you have a plan for tonight" Santana said when she finally understood.

"Oh, yes" Kurt smiled and took a sip of his orange juice. "Blaine made a huge mistake by inviting Jack over. It's a great opportunity for me to get him back."

"What do you want to do?" Mercedes asked carefully. She loved Kurt, he was a great friend and she mostly trusted his decisions, but now Kurt was pregnant and did stupid things. She didn't want to see him get hurt.

"It's simple" Kurt said. "I'm going to have a little chat with Jack. Privately."

"It's not going to work" Mercedes said. "Blaine will never leave you two alone, and I don't think it's a good idea anyway."

"Why not?" Kurt frowned.

"Look" Mercedes started after taking a deep breath. "I love you, Kurt. You're my best friend and I only want the best for you. That's why I think you should leave Blaine and his boyfriend alone."

"What?" Kurt asked.

"He's dating that guy now" Mercedes explained. "I'm sure you two had a great time when you were together but things are different now."

"Yes, because we're going to have a baby together and we're wasting our time for stupid games instead of enjoying this wonderful time together" Kurt said.

"I agree with Kurt" Rachel said. "I saw them together. Believe me, there's nothing between them."

"You can't be sure" Mercedes said.

"Well, you can easily find out" Santana shrugged. "Test him."

"What?" Kurt asked in confusion.

"You don't have to do much. Just 'accidentally' tell the guy about the baby" Santana explained. "It's all innocent and he can decide if he still wants Blaine when he's going to be the father of somebody else's child."

"That sounds great" Kurt nodded.

"I'm not sure it's a good idea" Mercedes said uncertainly.

"I have to do something if I don't want to lose him" Kurt said determinedly. "I'll talk to Jack. I'm getting bored of this game anyway, Blaine has to decide what he wants."

Kurt was pretty sure he knew what Blaine truly wanted. And if he was right, Blaine would be his soon. He just had to be careful.

~ o ~

Kurt watched as Blaine got ready for his date with Jack. It was hard not to say anything as Blaine carefully picked out his clothes, especially when he asked for Kurt's opinion. It was so cruel of him. Blaine knew exactly how Kurt felt, that he wanted to cry every time Blaine said anything about Jack, but Kurt forced himself to be strong. He wouldn't let Blaine get what he wanted, whatever it was. He wanted to make Kurt jealous? Probably. But it was insane and childish and Kurt swore he would end it as soon as possible. He would let Blaine know that he was stupid but first he had to teach him a lesson. He deserved it after all. Playing with a pregnant man like that wasn't fair. But Kurt knew exactly how to handle the situation.

"You should wear the purple shirt" Kurt commented, trying not to seem to amused. Blaine knew nothing about fashion and he was stupid enough to ask for Kurt's help.

Blaine looked down at his mustard yellow pants and then at the bright purple shirt.

"Are you sure?" he asked uncertainly.

"Blaine, fashion is my life" Kurt said. "Believe me, you'll look amazing in those clothes."

Especially since Kurt had made some retailoring the previous night and Blaine had no chance to get into that shirt anymore.

"Okay. I believe you" Blaine nodded.

"You should wash your hair, too" Kurt said.

"But you know how my hair looks after…"

"Just use my hair balm" Kurt said. "Don't worry. Everything will be fine."

Blaine nodded and disappeared in the bathroom. Kurt sighed as he watched him, unable to hide his smile anymore. Blaine would regret this night. He would so regret it. And Kurt would have a great time watching him.

It was almost time to go when Kurt heard Blaine cry out. He leaned back on the couch, resting his head on the pillow as he waited for Blaine to show up. When it finally happened, Kurt couldn't stop himself anymore. He laughed.

Blaine couldn't have looked any worse. He had dried his hair but it only ruined his locks. His head was a mess, his hair standing away in every possible direction, his face red of anger and desperation. He got into his clothes somehow but the shirt was too tight and the colors gave Kurt a headache. Blaine only made things worse if that was possible by choosing his favorite green shoes for his outfit.

"I knew!" Blaine said desperately. "What should I do now?"

"Don't panic" Kurt said. "You have plenty of time to make it right."

The words barely left his words when the bell rang. Kurt turned towards the door but didn't make any move.

"It has to be him" Blaine said. "You have to open the door."

"I can't" Kurt sighed. "The baby has a really bad day. It can't stop moving and it makes me sick."

Blaine had no choice. He had to walk to the door and face Jack. At least the night couldn't get any worse...

"Hey Bla… Oh" Jack said as his eyes landed on Blaine.

"Yeah. I-I need some more time to get ready" Blaine said awkwardly. "I hope you don't mind."

"If it means you don't want to go out in those…" Jack muttered.

"Come in" Blaine said. "Do you know my roommate, Kurt?"

Kurt smiled at Jack but didn't make a move towards him.

"Yes, we already met at the coffee shop" Jack said. "Grande nonfat mocha?"

"You know my coffee order" Kurt smiled. "Impressive."

Blaine looked from one man to the other, not knowing what to do. He didn't want to leave the two of them alone, especially since Jack didn't know their story – not that Blaine wanted to tell him anyway. He hoped that they wouldn't reach the point where he had to talk about it.

"Just go, Blaine" Kurt said easily. "I'll keep him company."

"Thanks" Blaine muttered and finally walked out of the room to find new clothes and do something with his hair.

Kurt looked after him, calculating how much time they had. Probably enough for a little chat before they got to the main topic. Blaine usually spent a lot of time in the bathroom, he wouldn't be back in the next half an hour or so. Kurt smirked as he turned back to Jack who was still standing beside him.

"He spends an awfully much time in the bathroom. You should sit down" he said.

"Thanks" Jack said and took a seat beside Kurt.

"I tried to help him with his clothes but he's so stubborn" Kurt shook his head. "Have you seen those clothes?"

"Please, don't mention it" Jack said. "I'm not sure I'll be able to get that picture out of my mind."

Kurt threw back his head and laughed. Maybe Jack wasn't a bad guy after all. He already felt bad for playing with him but he couldn't do anything else. It was Blaine who had dragged him into this mess on the first place.

"How are you two doing?" Kurt asked.

"We hang out sometimes" Jack shrugged.

"That doesn't sound too serious" Kurt said.

"What should I say? It's still fresh" Jack said. "We barely know each other."

"I get it" Kurt said.

It was time for the show. Kurt put a hand on his growing baby bump and slowly stood up. Jack noticed it immediately. His eyes widened when he realized why Kurt kept a hand on his abdomen. Of course he did. Kurt's tight clothes didn't hide anything.

"Sorry. It's getting uncomfortable. I have to move a little" Kurt said.

"You… Are you…" Jack simply motioned towards Kurt's baby bump.

"Of course" Kurt said easily.

"Well… Wow" Jack said. "I mean… Sorry. I just… I never saw anyone… You know."

"Oh, don't worry. People stare at me like that all the time" Kurt said. That was true. Only he didn't take it that easily.

"I'm sorry" Jack said again.

"I'm surprised that Blaine didn't tell you" Kurt said.

"Why would he tell me?" Jack asked. "I mean… Yes, that's a huge thing but I don't think I should know too much about his roommate's baby."

"You have to know everything" Kurt said.

Jack didn't get it. He surely thought that Kurt was crazy. He had to do something to make things clear.

"Come on, Jack. You can't be that slow" Kurt sighed. "What do you think, who is the other father of the baby?"

"Should-should I know?" Jack asked uncertainly.

"I can't believe you don't know" Kurt sighed dramatically.

"Wait a second…" Jack turned towards the bathroom's door, then back to Kurt, then towards the door again.

Kurt took a deep breath, looked down at his baby bump and nodded.

"But-but you're friends!" Jack said.

"And we're also men with needs" Kurt replied.

"But… You're going to have a baby together!" Jack said with wide eyes.

"Yes" Kurt said as if it was completely natural.

"You're going to raise a baby together" Jack continued.

"That's how adults do things, right?" Kurt shrugged.

"You're roommates."

"Yes."

"You also have sex."

"Occasionally."

Jack was silent for a while. Kurt gave him some time to get used to the idea, so he could decide if he should say more.

"I have to go" Jack said suddenly and jumped up so suddenly that he almost tripped.

"But you've just arrived!"

"I… I have to… I… never mind" Jack didn't even look back at him as he made his way towards the door.

"Hey, you have to come back!" Kurt said. "You haven't even heard my wonderful threesome idea!"

The door was slammed into his face and he heard Jack run away from their door.

"Well, that was easy" Kurt sighed. He walked back to the couch and waited in patience for Blaine's appearance. He was surprised that Blaine needed several minutes to show up. He must have heard them talk, at least the last part of their conversation. Or his now ex-boyfriend shouting and making a hasty exit.

"Where's Jack?" Blaine asked when he finally walked out of the bathroom, looking just slightly better than before.

"I'm so sorry, Blaine" Kurt said, giving his best guilty face. "It happened so suddenly. He saw my baby bump and we started talking… I guess he didn't know about our baby."

"Oh, God" Blaine said as he pressed his eyes closed and took a seat beside Kurt.

"I'm sorry" Kurt said again.

"It doesn't matter" Blaine said way too easily.

"Wait, what?" Kurt frowned.

"If he doesn't accept the baby, we shouldn't be together anyway" Blaine shrugged. He put a hand on Kurt's baby bump and looked straight into Kurt's eyes. Kurt expected something. Anything, the smallest sign that Blaine felt something, too, but Blaine pulled back in the end. "Pizza?"

"Excuse me?"

"It looks like I have nothing to do tonight" Blaine explained. "Come on. I know you can't resist a good pizza."

"You know me too well" Kurt smiled.

He sighed when Blaine disappeared from the room to order their dinner. He had expected an awfully long night when Blaine told him again and again how badly Jack had hurt him. But Blaine took it so easily, as if the other man didn't matter. Kurt couldn't believe he was right and it was so easy to get Jack out of the picture. Now he only had to figure out what to do with Blaine. He had a bad feeling that making him admit his feelings wouldn't be that easy. Maybe it wouldn't happen at all. Kurt had to figure out what was Blaine's real problem with him, so he could work on it. Okay, Blaine was easy to read most of the time but Kurt wasn't sure what he should do next. He didn't want to screw up, so he had to keep his hormones under control as much as he could, or he would lose Blaine for real the next time. No, he would be patient. He had to be. Now that they were safe of intruders, he had all the time he needed to get Blaine back.


	19. Chapter 19

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

Kurt sighed as he looked at Blaine sitting beside him in the waiting area of the hospital. They were waiting for Sebastian who was late because of another patient. Although Kurt was glad to have some private time with Blaine, it was getting frustrating. Blaine was awfully silent for some reason, he barely talked to Kurt and it was getting annoying. Kurt had thought that now that he didn't have to worry about other man taking Blaine away from him, everything would be fine. They had been fine after all, for the first two days after Jack had left so suddenly. Blaine had been so nice to him, he had bought Kurt coffee and everything possible to make him feel better, he had spent a lot more time home and they had talked so much. But it had ended badly again. They had talked about the next appointment with Sebastian and Kurt had told Blaine that he wanted to know the baby's gender. Blaine, on the other hand, believed that they should wait until the baby's birth. Kurt didn't want to wait, he wanted to know if they were having a boy or a girl, he wanted to find a suitable name for the baby and he wanted to plan how the nursery would look like. Blaine didn't see why he needed the baby's gender for it. Of course not, Blaine didn't care about the nursery's color or anything else. He didn't understand that it was important for Kurt. Kurt had also offered him to keep the baby's gender secret, so Blaine didn't have to learn it too early. It would be Kurt's secret right until the end. But Blaine didn't want that either. So they didn't talk to each other again and it was getting really boring. Kurt hated that Blaine was so stubborn and they wasted their precious time they should have spent together for such stupid fights. It was such a small thing, they would learn the baby's gender sooner or later and it wasn't like it changed anything. Ugh, stupid Blaine.

"He's late" Kurt said after a while.

"I know" Blaine nodded.

"I just want to get over with this" Kurt said. "It really doesn't matter. I can feel the baby, I know it's fine, and it's not like we'll find out anything else today."

"That's right" Blaine said.

They were silent for a while again, until Kurt gathered his courage to speak again.

"It's stupid, you know" he said.

"What?" Blaine asked and finally turned to look at him.

"That you don't want to know the baby's gender" Kurt said.

"I want it to be surprise" Blaine said.

"Oh, come on, we'll find out sooner or later" Kurt rolled his eyes.

"I don't want to know until the baby is born" Blaine said.

"But I do" Kurt said.

"We already talked about this…"

"And I don't agree with you" Kurt said.

"It's about the baby's privacy…"

"No, it's about you being stubborn" Kurt interrupted.

"You can't always get what you want" Blaine said.

"But you can, right?" Kurt asked back.

Luckily, Sebastian chose that moment to join them. There was a wide smile on his face until he realized that he had just interrupted a fight.

"Again?" he asked.

"He started it" Blaine said.

"What?" Kurt asked.

"I can't believe you're going to have a baby together" Sebastian sighed, shaking his head. These two could be so childish. He hoped that they sorted things out before the baby's birth because their suppressed feelings were killing their relationship. Everybody could see it expect for Kurt and Blaine. It was so stupid.

"Me neither" Kurt muttered and shot an angry glare towards Blaine before walking into Sebastian's room.

They were silent again, much to Sebastian's relief. He wanted to do his job and didn't need another fight like he had seen so many times when the fathers-to-be visited him together. He examined Kurt in silence and only looked at Blaine when it was time for the ultrasound.

"Don't you want to come closer?" he asked.

"Just leave him. He'll see something he doesn't want to know if he comes closer" Kurt said.

"I guess you still don't want to know the baby's gender" Sebastian said.

"No, we don't" Blaine said.

"Yes, I do" Kurt said at the same time.

Sebastian sighed and looked at the screen. He smirked when the baby turned immediately and they could see everything important. Or everything they didn't want to know. He couldn't decide what the others wanted.

"Is this…" Kurt leaned closer to the screen.

"Don't look at it!" Blaine said as he jumped to him to hide the baby from Kurt's sight.

"You're ridiculous" Kurt said.

"We agreed that we don't want to know the baby's gender" Blaine said.

"No. YOU don't want to know it" Kurt said.

"Guys, I'm trying to work here" Sebastian said. "Could you discuss this at home?"

"No" the others said in unison.

Sebastian sighed and buried his face into his hands. He was thinking about finding a new doctor for Kurt because he wasn't sure if he could deal with this until the end of his pregnancy.

"Look, I don't want to fight over this" Blaine said.

"Me neither" Kurt said, a lot calmer this time.

"So we agree that we don't want to know the baby's gender…"

"God, you're so childish" Kurt said.

"No, you're childish" Blaine shot back.

"I think you're both childish" Sebastian said. "Now shut up and let me work."

They didn't say anything else until they left the hospital. Sebastian worked faster than usually and when he was done, he pushed the papers into Kurt's hands, telling him that he should be back in the next month if everything was fine until then. Sebastian was clearly pissed off, so Kurt only thanked him for his help and left as soon as possible.

"So the baby is healthy" Blaine said when they got home. He hoped that Kurt wasn't angry anymore and they could have a normal conversation.

"Of course it's healthy" Kurt snorted.

"Are you still angry?" Blaine asked.

"Yes, I am" Kurt said honestly.

"Look, I know you want to know everything but I don't" Blaine said. "Please, you have to accept it."

"Why should I?" Kurt asked. "Why should I agree with you in everything?"

"Because…"

"You know what? I don't want to hear" Kurt said. "I'll be in my room."

"Kurt…"

Blaine sighed heavily as he watched Kurt leave. He already knew that it was better to leave Kurt alone when he was angry.

~ o ~

Days passed and Kurt still didn't talk to him. It was horrible. Blaine was so used to Kurt's presence, he missed having him around, he missed their conversations, their private time when they were so close to each other, when he was lost in Kurt's sweet scent, when he held him in his arms and waited for the baby's kicks. He missed laughing with Kurt when the baby finally moved and they shared their thoughts with each other about how the baby must be feeling.

He also started to feel guilty. Okay, that wasn't new, he had been feeling bad since telling Kurt about Jack the first time. He remembered how Kurt had looked at him that time, how hurt he had been. It had been insane. It wasn't like Blaine had planned a relationship with anybody else. Deep inside he still loved Kurt and dreamed about their future together. He didn't see anybody else in that future, only the three of them, as a happy family. To be honest, he was glad that Jack had left him. He had been thinking about how to end it before it was too late, because he didn't want to hurt more people than necessary. He had already hurt the person he loved, so making things more complicated would have been horrible. But Jack was gone, much to Blaine's relief, so he shouldn't feel bad for that anymore. He still couldn't get rid of the guilt. He had screwed up and now it seemed like he was losing Kurt, too. It was all his fault.

He had no idea why he went into those fights with Kurt all the time. He knew that those small things didn't really matter. Like the baby's gender. He knew that they would find out sooner or later, and he also knew that it would make Kurt happy to know if they had a boy or a girl. So why couldn't he just let Kurt get what he wanted?

When Kurt was around, everything seemed more intense. Blaine felt the love for Kurt and their unborn child but there was something else Blaine couldn't really explain. Something he suppressed and what made him so frustrated. That feeling wasn't pleasant at all and he wanted to get rid of it, but how should he do it when he couldn't even explain what it was?

One thing was sure, Kurt wanted him to make the first step. Blaine knew him enough to know that Kurt was stubborn and patient enough to wait for days if not weeks for Blaine to make a move. Blaine had to do something, so they could be back to normal again. Or not normal but something close to that. He wanted to get Kurt's friendship back and when it was his, they had to sort things out, so they could move on. To a next level, the one Blaine wanted so much.

He never talked to Kurt about it but he dreamed a lot about the two of them. It seemed natural, Kurt was hot, probably the hottest man he had ever seen, and the pregnancy just made him look even better. Although Kurt complained a lot about his shape, Blaine knew that he wasn't right. Kurt looked perfect. Blaine loved everything in him, his shiny hair that smelled like lavender, his perfect pale skin… Oh, he still remembered what touching that smooth skin was like. And there was his growing baby bump, probably the hottest thing in Kurt's whole form. Blaine hadn't known that a baby bump could be so sexy.

He found himself thinking more and more about what the two of them could do if they had been really together. Like before. And more. Blaine had never been the type with great new ideas but Kurt changed that, too. Blaine spent a lot of time alone in his room, especially after those times when Kurt let close. Just touching Kurt was enough to start something pleasant and Blaine often found himself excusing himself into his room before Kurt noticed the effect he left on Blaine's body. Blaine locked himself into his room, careful not to let Kurt know what he was doing in there all alone because it would have been embarrassing, then took his place on the bed and let himself get lost in one of his favorite dreams about them. It was so much easier to be bold when he was all alone, he let his imagination take control over his body and he imagined himself with Kurt in every possible way, forcing himself to make it last as long as possible. He figured out that it made him feel so much better, when he finally reached his climax, it was so powerful that his whole body was shaking from it.

He noticed something else one night, something that brought his private activity to a brand new level. He was walking back from the bathroom when he heard strange noises coming from Kurt's room. He pressed his ear to the closed door, worried that something might be wrong with Kurt, but his worry soon turned to surprise when he realized that the strange noises coming from Kurt weren't from distress but pleasure. Kurt's moans became louder with every passed second and in a wonderful moment, Blaine heard him say his name. There was no mistake, Kurt was thinking about him, too.

Blaine found himself lurking in the living room every single night after that. He had read a lot of books about pregnancy, he knew very well that Kurt was horny all the time, so he stayed behind for a while to listen to those wonderful noises before moving back to his own room to get lost in his new dreams.

He continued doing so after their latest fight. He knew that it was wrong, that he should come up with an idea how to say sorry, that he should let Kurt get what he wanted this time, so they had a chance to move on and enjoy these wonderful months before they became parents. But then again, there was something that prevented him from doing so. He couldn't express the feeling, he just knew that he wasn't ready to admit that he was wrong.

So he was left alone with his fantasies because Kurt didn't even come out of his room when Blaine was home. He usually left before Blaine woke up and came home way before Blaine's working hours were over. Kurt must have eaten in his room because Blaine never heard him come out, he didn't even use the bathroom while Blaine was awake.

It finally made Blaine think about what he should do. He considered asking for his friends' help but he decided that he should solve this on his own in the end. Wes usually didn't say anything and Jeff couldn't tell him anything useful. Blaine also had a feeling that Jeff didn't really like Kurt and he was afraid that his friend would give the wrong advice. So he was left alone with this, even if that was what he wanted to least. He was so bad in this. Every time he tried to have a relationship, he screwed up. He always did something wrong, he always gave too much. Well, not this time. He thought that he didn't give Kurt enough, that was why they couldn't really get along. That was strange. Maybe Kurt meant more than any other man so far, that was why he acted differently.

Well, their relationship was certainly different. Not only because of the baby but also because it had become so intense so quickly. Was it possible to love someone too much? Because Blaine felt like that was the source of their fights. He loved Kurt too much. It still didn't explain that feeling hidden in the deep…

His thoughts didn't give him a single moment of peace and they also disturbed his favorite private moments. They bothered him every moment of every day and made him worried about Kurt. He found himself keeping his phone in his hand in every single break, thinking about calling Kurt to make sure he was alright. He missed Kurt too much. Even if he knew that he still lived there with him, he wanted more. He wanted everything possible.

Preferably before somebody else could take Kurt away from him. He didn't know how serious Kurt's relationship was with that guy… What was his name? Oh, right. Finchel. Such a stupid name. Blaine already hated it. So he had to be quick if he didn't want Kurt to end up by that man. Kurt was a clever man but he was also pregnant and Blaine was pretty sure that he would fall for anybody if he got the care he needed from them. Blaine couldn't let that happen. He still wasn't sure how he wanted to make it work but he knew now that he wanted to be with Kurt.

So he swallowed his pride and decided to make a move. He went on a run to calm his nerves and hoped that he wouldn't lose his head, whatever Kurt said that night. That was their only chance to move forward. Blaine reminded himself that Kurt was pregnant, he felt everything a lot stronger than usually and Blaine had to be patient with him. Of course he had to, why couldn't he understand that earlier? It was so obvious.

So he planned everything carefully and when he was done with work, he went to get what he needed for the evening. He walked home and started to cook dinner. He rarely cooked, probably because his meals were never good enough, but now he prepared everything slowly and hoped that he wouldn't screw up anything. He knew that Kurt wouldn't be home too early because he had a meeting and they never ended quickly. He had time to find the recipe he needed, he placed the flowers onto the table and set it for two. Then he finished dinner and sat down in the living room, waiting for Kurt.

The man arrived only minutes later, seemingly exhausted. Blaine jumped up immediately and went to greet him and take his coat from him.

"Hey! How are you feeling?" Blaine asked.

Kurt seemed surprised that Blaine was so nice to him but didn't say anything.

"I made dinner" Blaine continued.

"Thanks" Kurt said quietly.

"I also brought you flowers" Blaine said. Kurt didn't seem excited at all.

"That's really nice of you, Blaine" Kurt said.

Blaine closed his eyes for a second and reminded himself to be patient. He didn't want to ruin this night.

"Come on. Wash your hands. I'll be in the kitchen."

He placed the plates onto the table and sat down. Kurt joined him soon and took his place on the other side of the table.

"How was you day?" Blaine asked.

"What's going on?" Kurt asked back.

"What do you mean?" Blaine frowned.

"This" Kurt motioned towards the table. "This is… This isn't like you."

It hurt so much. Blaine wasn't a bad person, he just didn't know how to handle the situation. But he was trying really hard.

"Look, Kurt, I know I haven't been too nice to you…" Kurt snorted and Blaine fell silent for a moment. "...But I want to make this work. For the baby's sake."

Kurt still didn't seem too happy. What was wrong with him?

"We could go to the mall this weekend" Blaine said quickly. "We could buy a few clothes for the baby."

Maybe talking about the baby wasn't the best idea, Kurt was still pissed off because Blaine hadn't let him find out the baby's gender. He bit his lip nervously, afraid of what Kurt might say next. Luckily, Kurt didn't seem to be offended. Blaine could see a small smile on his face as he looked at him.

"That would be nice" Kurt said in the end.

"Amazing!" Blaine said excitedly. "Let's eat something! Are you hungry?"

"I'm starving" Kurt admitted.

"That's great because I made a lot of food" Blaine said. "I'm not sure it's good, I don't cook too often…"

"It's great, Blaine" Kurt said. "Thank you. I really appreciate what you're doing for me."

"You deserve the best" Blaine smiled. "You do the hard job after all."

"It's not that hard" Kurt said as he looked down at his baby bump. "I love it most of the time. It's a wonderful experience."

"I bet it is" Blaine smiled.

"The baby is moving" Kurt said after a while. "Give me your hand."

Blaine stood up and walked to Kurt, then placed his hand on his baby bump. Kurt was right, the baby kicked him immediately. Blaine smiled and stroked Kurt's stomach.

"I can't wait to meet our baby" Blaine said.

Kurt only smiled. There was something in his eyes Blaine couldn't read but he hoped that it was something good, something Kurt didn't tell him because he couldn't understand. He really wanted to make this work but they both had to do a lot for that. Blaine made himself a promise that night that he would do his best, that he would be more patient and understanding, so they would be fine by the time the baby arrived. He hoped that nothing would get into their way this time, especially not his stupid decisions. It was time to grow up. For his family.


	20. Chapter 20

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **My exams are coming up, I have to study a lot but I still have two weeks left until my study leave. I'm so busy right now. So I have no idea when the next update will come. I'll do my best. Thank you for your patience!**

Kurt found himself avoiding Blaine more and more often. It was insane. They finally seemed to be doing fine, they didn't fight so much anymore, there were no other guys involved and Blaine seemed to care about him a lot more than before. So everything was fine and Kurt should have been happy that he got what he wanted. He still couldn't enjoy the situation. He blamed it on the hormones because they made everything so complicated.

First there was the fear of losing Blaine. He had no idea where it came from. He had been completely sure that Blaine was his and his only and no one would step between them anymore. But then his feelings changed and he started feeling jealous every time they left the apartment. Not to mention when Blaine went to work all alone… He was surrounded by hot models all the time and it made Kurt worried. What if he fell in love with any of them? That would be horrible. Kurt was pretty sure that he wouldn't be able to take that. But it wasn't just about those men, they lived in New York after all, there were so many single guys around them. Blaine was in danger all the time and he didn't even see it. Sometimes Kurt found himself calling Blaine unnecessarily, just to make sure nothing happened to him. Blaine found it strange, he didn't understand a thing Kurt asked from him, especially those weird questions about who he met and what the other people around him looked like.

Kurt knew what caused his extreme interest in Blaine. It had been there before but it hadn't been so strong. Maybe because Kurt had taken care of his needs. It had been fine for a while but it wasn't enough anymore. Kurt was horny all the time and helping himself out was nowhere as good as real sex. He missed that so badly, more and more with every passed day.

Sometimes he wondered if Blaine would help him if Kurt told him what he needed. They were getting closer to each other again and Kurt truly hoped that it would work this time. It was just the matter of time and they would be back together and then they would have sex. So why couldn't they start practicing a little earlier? It was so good, they would both enjoy it and it wasn't like they hadn't done that before. He had gotten pregnant after all.

Still, telling Blaine about his needs was so difficult. Kurt was afraid that he wouldn't be able to control himself and it would ruin everything again. He found himself touching Blaine every time he had a chance and it felt so inappropriate. It felt like he wanted to use Blaine. No, he truly wanted to use Blaine. He had everything planned, he just needed courage to attack Blaine.

In his sober moments he knew that he had to do something for their relationship first and then he would get what he wanted. Blaine bought him flowers and cooked dinner, brought him chocolate and everything else Kurt wanted to make him feel better. Kurt had to do the same, that was how it worked after all. Only it wasn't that easy to make Blaine happy. While Kurt cried in happiness from a slice of cheesecake, Blaine didn't like anything. Well, not enough to use it to get him. He was so difficult and Kurt couldn't get any information out of him. He got stuck in the middle of nothing and he was getting more and more frustrated. He needed Blaine. And he needed sex. Preferably at the same time, as fast as possible.

"Is everything okay?" Blaine asked one evening when he caught Kurt watching him.

"Sure" Kurt muttered, hoping that Blaine would turn around again because his ass looked really sexy in his tight pants.

"You are quiet" Blaine said.

Kurt only nodded. Of course he was, he couldn't just tell Blaine what he was thinking about. Or maybe he could?

"I like your pants" he blurted out before he could stop himself.

Blaine blushed and looked down at his newly gotten pants. He had bought them because he hoped that Kurt would like the sight and maybe it would get him closer to Kurt. He caught Kurt staring at him many times, he could practically see him undress Blaine with his eyes, but Blaine was too scared of admitting the truth, that he was a stalker and the sweet noises Kurt made at night turned him on. That was something he would never tell Kurt.

"Thank you" Blaine said in the end. "I like your dress, too."

Blaine knew he said something wrong. Kurt looked down, seemingly hurt.

"It's a long shirt" he said. "I'm not a woman."

"I know" Blaine said quickly. "That's a great shirt. I love that shirt. You should get me one, too."

Kurt threw back his head and laughed.

"What's so funny?" Blaine asked in confusion. He could never be sure what to expect from Kurt.

"Nothing. Just…" Kurt shook his head. "It's hard to believe you know so little about fashion when it's practically your job."

"That's not exactly my job" Blaine corrected him. "I do photos about models in various clothes. That's completely different."

"But you see them in those clothes" Kurt said slowly. "Don't tell me you don't pay attention to their looks."

"Not really" Blaine shrugged.

"You can't be serious" Kurt said.

"Why?" Blaine frowned.

"Oh, come on. You're surrounded by hot men all the time. I can't believe they don't catch your attention" Kurt said.

Blaine smiled. Kurt knew little about his feelings if he thought that Blaine was interested in anybody but Kurt.

"Believe it or not, I don't care about them at all" Blaine said. "It's just work. There are so many more beautiful things in the world than some men."

"Like?" Kurt asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Let me show you" Blaine smiled.

"What do you want to do?" Kurt asked in confusion.

"You'll see" Blaine said. He had a wonderful idea of what to do the next day.

~ o ~

Blaine tried not to laugh as he watched Kurt. It was clear that this wasn't what Kurt expected, he couldn't hide the disgust from his face. He took careful steps forward, probably because he tried to save his expensive shoes from dirt.

"We are almost there" Blaine said. "You'll love it."

Kurt's expression told Blaine that he was pretty sure Blaine couldn't show him anything he liked out here. Although Kurt loved taking long walks in the park, he never left the paths. What Blaine wanted to show him was deep in the woods, though, where everything was dirty and full of bugs.

"Come on. Be excited for me" Blaine said.

"This is getting scarier with every passed second" Kurt muttered.

"You're no fun" Blaine shook his head but couldn't hide his smile.

He led Kurt deeper into the woods where it was a lot darker and the air cooler. It was also a lot quieter. They could hear the noises of the city but they seemed so far away. This place was so peaceful, even Kurt could feel it.

"Okay. You might be right about this place" Kurt said after a while.

"And you haven't even seen the best part" Blaine smiled.

Kurt opened his mouth to ask him what he meant when Blaine stopped and motioned towards something in front of them. Kurt followed his gaze and his eyes widened when he realized that there was a small clearing full of flowers in front of them.

"How is it possible?" he asked. It seemed so unbelievable that there were such places in the city and he didn't know about them.

"I spent a lot of time out here when I was younger" Blaine shrugged. "I was a lonely kid, I didn't have too many friends. I came here more and more often and I brought my camera with me after a while. I take a lot of photos here."

"You could show me them once" Kurt said quietly.

Blaine looked at him and smiled. He squeezed Kurt's hand and then pulled him forward.

"So… are we going to take photos of the flowers?" Kurt asked.

"No" Blaine shook his head. He pulled out the blanket from his bag and laid it out to the ground. "Sit down."

Kurt sighed and put down his own bag before kneeling onto the blanket. Blaine joined him in silence and pulled out his camera. Kurt thought he would take a few photos of the place but Blaine kept his eyes on the flowers and didn't make a single move.

"What are you doing?" Kurt asked after a while.

"Shh" Blaine shushed him. "Be patient."

Kurt sighed and shook his head. He had no idea what Blaine wanted with this but he wanted to know more. Okay, this place was really nice but he waited waiting. Blaine probably knew that because he seemed to enjoy the situation way too much.

Kurt watched the other man in silence. Blaine's hair was shining brightly in the sunlight and his skin seemed to glow lightly, too. He seemed so peaceful and happy and it just made him a lot more beautiful than usually. Kurt wanted to reach out and touch Blaine's smooth skin like the first night they had shared and lean closer to inhale his sweet scent. God, it was happening again. And Kurt had nowhere to go in that moment. What if he did something stupid before he could stop himself?

"There" Blaine said suddenly and moved away from him before Kurt could actually do something embarrassing. He got on his knees and leaned closer to a flower, carefully raising the camera in front of him.

"What are you doing?" Kurt asked as he joined him.

"Slowly" Blaine told him. "Look."

That was when Kurt noticed the small butterfly sitting on the petals of the flower. It was a colorful one with unusual wings, yellow and black with a few specks of dark blue.

"Stay still" Blaine said and Kurt wasn't sure if he told him or the butterfly.

Kurt held his breath as he waited, hoping that the butterfly wouldn't move until Blaine caught the wonderful sight. It didn't happen for a few long moments and Kurt started to think that something was wrong with Blaine's camera when the soft click finally came. The butterfly flew away in the next second, probably because it was disturbed by the sound. It didn't matter. Blaine raised his camera triumphantly and sat back down onto the blanket.

"Here. You have to see it" he said.

Kurt joined him, sitting so close that their shoulders touched. He was afraid that it might be too much for Blaine but the man didn't seem to mind. Not at all. Kurt blinked in surprise as Blaine put an arm around him and pulled him closer.

He forced himself to look away from the man and onto the photo Blaine showed him. He smiled as he leaned closer, taking in every detail he could on the small screen. He had seen reality with his own eyes but what Blaine had made of it with his camera was so much more beautiful. He couldn't make out much of the background, only the different shades of green, the photo focused completely on the red petals and the butterfly on them.

"It's beautiful" Kurt said. Like a painting.

"You seem surprised" Blaine said.

"I am" Kurt said honestly. "I mean… This is so different from your other works."

"Because those are work" Blaine replied. "But this… this is art."

Kurt looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"What?"

"You say that photography can be art?" Kurt asked, smiling.

"Why not? Just because I use modern technology, I create something beautiful" Blaine said.

"That's true" Kurt nodded. Blaine's photo was really beautiful.

"I wish I could live from this" Blaine said after a while.

"I thought you liked your job" Kurt frowned.

"I do" Blaine nodded. "Well, I love taking photos. I don't really enjoy doing the same over and over again."

Kurt opened his mouth to say something but then closed it again. He thought that Blaine's job was wonderful, he worked with so many people, he traveled a lot and his job was full of adventure. Maybe he was wrong.

"My employers want always the same" Blaine explained. "I would love to try new scenes and add some accessories but they usually don't like my ideas."

"Why not? I think you have great ideas" Kurt said.

"I don't know. I guess they don't want to take a risk" Blaine shrugged.

"Why don't you try something new then?" Kurt asked. "You could start your own business. Your photos are beautiful, Blaine, you could live from them."

"I don't think so" Blaine sighed. "Let's face it, it's too risky and I can't afford that for myself. Not now when I'm responsible for you and the baby."

Kurt looked down. It was his fault that Blaine had to worry about money. He had started this, he had wanted the baby, Blaine was just dragged into this mess. Even if Kurt didn't regret having Blaine in his life, he felt bad for ruining his plans for the future.

"Hey, don't be sad" Blaine smiled when he saw how upset Kurt was. "It's not the end of the world."

"You have to do this because of me" Kurt said.

"That's not true" Blaine said seriously. "I could have chosen a different path but I was too scared to take the risk. I don't regret my decision, though. It led me to something I want a lot more."

"Like?" Kurt asked.

Blaine didn't answer but moved closer to him. Kurt held his breath, unable to move. He was scared that he might ruin this beautiful moment, so he stayed completely still and waited for Blaine to take the step he was waiting for. Blaine reached out and touched his cheek, then moved his hand down to his stomach. He rested his hand on Kurt's baby bump for a while, only for a few second but it felt like eternity. They were so close, Kurt wanted to close that small gap between them and taste Blaine's lips. He wanted it so badly. But he also knew that he had to wait for Blaine to make a move. He couldn't ruin this.

Just when he was certain that Blaine would kiss him, the man pulled back and reached for his camera. Kurt wanted to cry. It was so close. He wanted it so badly. But maybe Blaine didn't. Yeah, that was the only explanation. How else could he resist such an opportunity?

"Stay like this" Blaine said and took a few photos of Kurt. "This is perfect. You should see yourself."

Blaine didn't see it. How could he not see it, Kurt had no idea.

"Smile" Blaine said. "Come on, Kurt. You're beautiful. Smile for me."

Kurt did as he was told, although he was dying inside. Maybe he was wrong all along. Maybe Blaine was already over him and only stayed with him because of the baby.

No, he told himself. He saw how Blaine looked at him. It was real, it had to be. They only had to figure out how to destroy that invisible wall still standing between them. He had to be patient. Being with Blaine was so much easier now, it was just the matter of time and they would be back to normal. It would work, only the time wasn't right for more. He had to understand that.

Kurt smiled, for real this time. It wasn't that bad actually. They talked again, they spent time together and Blaine talked about his feelings honestly. They didn't need more for now. They were on the right path.


	21. Chapter 21

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I finally managed to finish this chapter... I have a lot of trouble with my exams or better with the administration. It's getting really frustrating. I can't wait to get over this semester and focus on my researches. I can't believe I miss writing papers so badly.:D**

 **Thank you for your patience. I hope you like this chapter. It's a bit short but there's something huge coming in the next one and I had to end it here.**

Kurt was pretty sure he was in love. Totally, helplessly in love with one Blaine Anderson. Blaine was such a nice man. He cared about Kurt and the baby a lot, he was always there to carry Kurt things, to buy him everything he needed, even in the middle of the night, he sang like an angel and his body… Blaine had the most perfectly carved body Kurt had ever seen.

It happened one night when Kurt had to use the bathroom. He woke up from a sweet dream and he was too sleepy to notice that the bathroom was already occupied. He walked into the bathroom without trouble, his thoughts around the pictures he had just seen few minutes earlier. He hoped that he would find a way back to that dream. It was a really pleasant one.

He was finished and ready to leave when he heard the song. He stopped immediately, sweet dreams and everything else forgotten. Because Kurt finally realized that he wasn't alone in the bathroom.

Blaine was in the shower, singing and dancing, probably without any idea of what was going on outside. And he was naked. Kurt licked his lips as he took a tentative step forward. Blaine was so close to reach and he was too lost in his song to notice anything. Or so Kurt hoped. He already felt his body's response to the picture of Blaine's naked body, his tight muscles and wet hair. Oh, Kurt wanted to see it so badly. He wanted to touch Blaine's skin, run his fingers through his hair, get rid of his own clothes and join him in the shower. He had never done it in there before but he had imagined it so many times. It had to be amazing.

Blaine would say yes. Yes, Kurt only had to ask him and he would do whatever Kurt wanted. Blaine was such a gentleman and he cared about Kurt, a lot. If Kurt told him how he felt and what he needed, Blaine would give him everything. And Kurt only needed Blaine. Just one time, at least that night. Blaine wouldn't reject him, right?

Kurt was lost. He couldn't stop himself, he slowly made his way to the shower and reached out towards the man behind the curtain. He was so close to reach, Kurt could already feel the warmth of his body, Blaine's touch on his own skin… He needed it. He felt like he would die if he couldn't be with Blaine right in that moment.

Kurt didn't notice that Blaine was done, not until he opened the curtain and reached for his towel. Blaine was still humming happily as he stepped outside and only yelped in surprise when his eyes landed on Kurt, only a step away from him, his eyes fixed on his body.

Blaine quickly grabbed the towel to hide as much of his body as possible. Kurt opened his mouth to tell him that it wasn't necessary, that Blaine should just do what he had to because Kurt wouldn't bother him at all. But then Kurt finally realized what he was doing and quickly stepped back, horrified by his own actions.

"Kurt, what are you doing here?" Blaine asked.

"I had to pee" Kurt said quickly. His brain didn't seem to work too well.

"Couldn't it wai… What are you doing?"

Honestly, Kurt had no idea. Blaine was standing in front of him with nothing but a towel covering his lower body and Kurt couldn't think anymore. He reached out and touched that perfectly smooth skin and almost moaned in pleasure just from the touch. He missed Blaine so much.

"Kurt, what are you doing?" Blaine asked slowly. He didn't know if he should step back or just let it happen. He didn't want to fool himself, he enjoyed Kurt's touch, a lot.

"Your skin is so…"

Kurt came to his senses just in time, before he could say something embarrassing. Like sharing his thoughts about having sex with Blaine in different parts of the apartment. Yes, that would be horrible.

"What am I doing?" he asked to win some time for a good explanation. "Well, I… What do you think I'm doing?"

"Touching me?" Blaine offered.

"Well, yes, but I have a good reason for that" Kurt said, hoping that the reason would come soon because he couldn't leave the bathroom without giving Blaine one. "I… I'm just checking your stomach."

Not the best but more than nothing.

"Why would you do that?" Blaine frowned.

"Because I want to know what it feels like" Kurt said, looking at his baby bump. "I have to live with this all the time. I don't even remember what a flat stomach is like."

"So you are touching mine because you want to feel what it is like?" Blaine asked back. Nothing Kurt said made any sense.

"That's what I was doing but I'm not touching you anymore" Kurt said and forced himself to pull his hand back. For a second. Then he reached out to touch Blaine again, he just couldn't resist it. "One more second and I'll stop touching you."

"Okay" Blaine said slowly.

"I will" Kurt said, stroking Blaine's skin one more time.

Blaine thought he was stupid. Of course he did, Kurt was completely insane and he couldn't say anything reasonable. He could blame the hormones but it was getting really old and honestly, it had nothing to do with his hormones. Okay, not much.

"Don't look at me like this" he said in the end.

"How?" Blaine asked in confusion.

"Like it is wrong" Kurt answered. "You're touching me all the time."

"What?" Blaine was more confused than ever.

"You keep touching my stomach" Kurt explained.

"Because I want to feel the baby!" Blaine said.

"And now you know what it's like when the father of your baby touches your stomach" Kurt said. "I just wanted to let you know."

"So you broke into the bathroom while I was showering, just to show me what it is like when I touch your stomach?" Blaine asked. He started to believe that he had fallen asleep and this was just a crazy dream.

"Exactly" Kurt nodded.

"So you don't want me to touch your stomach anymore?" Blaine asked after a second of hesitation.

"Of course I do!" Kurt said. "It's nice, isn't it?"

"Well…" Blaine had no idea what to say. It was dangerous to say anything when Kurt was in full crazy pregnant mode. Unfortunately, saying nothing could be just as bad. "I-I think it is."

Kurt seemed to like the answer. He stepped back and smiled at him.

"Very well" he said. "Now that we discussed this, I should let you get dressed. I won't touch you again today, I promise."

He hesitated for a second.

"Maybe one more time…"

He took a step towards Blaine again but reminded himself how stupidly he was acting and forced himself to back away from Blaine, quickly, before he could do something crazy.

"Stupid hormones" he muttered to himself as he walked out of the bathroom, leaving a stunned Blaine behind.

~ o ~

"So you started touching him?"

Kurt wanted to die. Once he woke up the next morning, completely aware of what he had done the previous night, he wanted the ground to swallow him, so he didn't have to face Blaine again. Blaine was a real gentleman that morning nonetheless, he acted like nothing had happened and pampered Kurt with all those little things Kurt needed to have a good start for the day. Kurt was feeling worse and worse in Blaine's presence, though, he was afraid that he might do something stupid again, so he quickly fled from the apartment and called his friends for an emergency meeting to discuss what to do now. Unfortunately, none of them seemed to understand what he truly needed. They were having a good time listening to him, though.

"It's not funny" Kurt said, slapping Santana's shoulder when she couldn't stop laughing. "God, what should I do now?"

"Well, you could blame it on the hormones…"

"Or tell him that you're horny and need him to fuck you" Santana cut in. "Good for the daddy, good for the baby, he can't resist such an offer."

"So I should tell him that I need sex because of the baby?" Kurt asked in disbelief.

"Of course" Santana nodded. "If he's such a gentleman, he won't say no."

Kurt didn't think it was the best he could do. Sure, he was getting desperate, but he didn't want to involve the baby in his not-existing sex life. He just wanted Blaine because Blaine was sexy as hell and he missed having sex with him.

"Or you could talk to him" Mercedes said. "Tell him how you feel. Seriously, this is getting so old. You're both frustrated and fight all the time. You have to talk about your feelings."

"But what if he doesn't feel the same way?" Kurt asked in worry.

"I don't think you have to worry about that" Rachel said. "The guy likes you. Come on, he offered you to stay with him. He gives you everything you want…"

"Because I'm pregnant with his baby" Kurt muttered.

"Or because he wants to make you feel good" Rachel said. "What can you lose?"

"She's right" Mercedes nodded. "The worst that could happen is that you stay friends."

Kurt sighed heavily. He didn't want to be Blaine's friend. He wanted a lot more and he wasn't sure if he would survive if Blaine didn't feel anything.

"I have no idea what to do" Kurt said in the end.

"Come on, be brave" Rachel smiled. "It's just a talk. You'll be fine."

"What should I say?" Kurt said.

"That you're attracted to his body…"

"No, don't say anything about his body" Mercedes rolled her eyes. "This isn't about sex. Well, not just sex. You want a relationship with him, right? Then talk about your feelings."

"Tell him that you love him" Rachel said. "Oh, that's so romantic. I remember the first time Finn told me that he loved me. It was so…"

"We're not talking about you and giant this time" Santana interrupted and turned back to Kurt. "Just be quick and simple. And don't touch him until you discuss things."

"How am I supposed to do that?" Kurt asked in panic. "Normally I know what I should do but it's like I don't have any control over my body anymore. It's a miracle that I haven't done anything embarrassing yet."

"Well…"

"More embarrassing" Kurt corrected himself. "I don't want to scare him."

"Then control those crazy hormones of yours" Santana said. "Imagine how much sex you can have once you get the guy."

That was a wrong idea. Kurt didn't need more than a second to imagine what it would be like. Just him and Blaine and all those wonderful places in the apartment they could try...

"Not now" Santana said, rolling her eyes. "Control, remember?"

"Control" Kurt nodded. It wasn't like he had any over his stupid body but at least he had to try. He didn't want to screw up this time.

~ o ~

Blaine kept his gaze on the table in front of him. It was so embarrassing. He had thought that talking to his friends would be a good idea but now he knew that it wasn't. They found his little adventure with Kurt quite funny but that wasn't helping at all. Blaine was confused and he had no idea what to do.

"Would you stop laughing?" he asked when he gathered his courage and looked up. "I need your help."

"Help for what?" Jeff asked, still laughing.

"I have a serious problem here and you're just making fun of me" Blaine said in frustration.

"Blaine, you are an adult man" Wes said slowly. "You live with another adult man who is attracted to your body."

"And you're attracted to his body" Jeff continued. "So tell me, please. How exactly can we help you?"

Blaine didn't know what to say. Okay, it seemed simple, probably for everyone but him, but it really wasn't that simple. It was about him and Kurt. Things were never too simple when the two of them were involved, and Blaine didn't want to do anything stupid. Like going after Kurt after the bathroom scene and admitting how many times he dreamed about the two of them having sex. He had considered doing that the previous night. He had been so close to doing that but then he had ended up in his own bedroom in the end, helping himself. Because he was afraid of what would happen if he admitted his true feelings and he and Kurt would be back to what they had once had.

"It was a bad idea" Blaine decided and stood up.

"Hey, were are you going? Sit back down" Wes said and pushed his friend back down into his seat. "So what do you want to do?"

"What do you mean?" Blaine asked back.

"You and Kurt" Wes rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, sure" Blaine muttered. "I have no idea. I mean… I really like him. He's so nice. And funny. And hot..."

"You love him" Wes smiled.

"I guess we talked about this before" Blaine said. Yes, they talked about him and Kurt and awfully lot. He couldn't help it, though. He couldn't stop thinking about Kurt, so it was natural that all he could talk about now was Kurt.

"And still here you are, whining about your complicated love life instead of going home and talking to him honestly" Wes said. "Seriously, Blaine, this is getting so old. You need to talk to each other."

"I can't" Blaine sighed.

"Why not?" Wes asked.

"Because I don't want to screw this up" Blaine explained. "What if I do something wrong? What if he doesn't feel the same?"

"I don't think you have to worry about that" Wes smiled.

Beside him, Jeff snorted. Blaine turned to look at his other friends who had been silent for a while.

"What's wrong?" Blaine asked.

Jeff opened his mouth to say something but Wes was faster.

"Nothing" he said quickly. "We're happy that you and Kurt were able to sort things out and you're thinking about getting back together."

"That's not exactly…"

"Because we are your friends and we support you no matter what" Wes said, giving Jeff a pointed look.

"Sure" Jeff muttered and quickly left to get himself another drink. Blaine looked after him in confusion.

"What's wrong with him?" Blaine asked.

"Nothing. He's just stupid" Wes said. "Don't worry about him, he'll be fine. Focus on your own problem."

Blaine knew that there was something he should know about and Jeff would probably tell him one day soon. He also had a bad feeling that it was about Kurt. Jeff didn't seem to like Kurt at all, even if he didn't even know him. Maybe Blaine should let him meet Kurt in person, so Jeff would see what a wonderful person Kurt was.

"What are you still doing here?" Wes asked after a while.

"Excuse me?" Blaine blinked in confusion.

"Kurt" Wes said slowly. "You want to talk to Kurt, right?"

"You mean… Now?" Blaine asked with wide eyes.

"No, I think you should wait until your kid's graduation" Wes rolled his eyes. "Of course now. What are you waiting for?"

"But…"

"No buts. You played this game for far too long. It's time to be honest with each other" Wes said.

Blaine took a few deep breaths, trying to calm his rapid heart beat. It was easy to say what to do, facing his biggest fear was another thing. He was so scared of what Kurt would say that he was pretty sure that he would get sick before he reached their door. But the look Wes gave him was scary enough to stand up and walk out of the bar. He hoped that Kurt was in a good mood because he wanted to get over with this as soon as possible and get the answer what he wanted. He wished he had done this sooner. That he hadn't dated another guy. It had been so stupid. What had gotten into him? He had known back then that he wanted Kurt and nobody else? Why had he made everything so difficult then?

It was already done, though. He couldn't go back in time and stop himself from being stupid. All he could do was facing Kurt and telling him the truth. Yes, he would tell him everything. Okay, maybe not everything, he didn't want to scare Kurt by telling him what he did when he locked himself into his room, but everything else.

Kurt wasn't home when Blaine arrived, so he sat down in the living room and waited. It was good. He had some time to think about what he wanted to say and to calm his nerves. He reminded himself that Kurt was jealous every time when Blaine talked about other males. He also reminded himself how wonderful their sort-of date had been the other day. They were perfect for each other and Kurt knew that, too. So there was nothing to worry about, right? It would be fine. Everything would be so wonderful. He only had to be honest with the man he loved and everything would be okay.


	22. Chapter 22

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I had a particularly hard exam today but I successfully passed it. I'm going to get my well-deserved ice cream soon but first I want to surprise you with this chapter. I hope you like it.**

Kurt was surprised to find Blaine already home. When he met his friends, he usually didn't come home earlier than Kurt, especially since Kurt was too tired most of the time to hang out with his friends like before. He needed his eight hours of sleep, if not more. Not tonight, though. He was too lost in his thoughts about Blaine and himself to feel exhausted. It just became worse when his eyes landed on Blaine, sitting on the couch in complete silence. Kurt could tell that something was wrong with him. Blaine was so easy to read, Kurt could always tell when something bothered him.

"What's wrong?" Kurt asked as he walked closer.

"Nothing" Blaine said quickly.

"Are you sure? You are so pale" Kurt said in concern.

He walked to Blaine, sat down beside him and pressed his hand to Blaine's forehead. Blaine closed his eyes and sighed. Kurt's hand was so cool, just what he needed. He imagined that hand wandering down his chest, finding the button of his pants and…

Blaine jumped up so suddenly that it scared Kurt. His baby must have felt it because it kicked him hard. Kurt put a calming hand on his baby bump and rubbed it carefully.

"Sorry. I'm so sorry" Blaine said quickly. At least he calmed down a bit. He had to be calm for this conversation, he could dream about Kurt's hands as much as he wanted, later. But now he had something else to do.

"Are you alright?" Kurt asked. "You are so weird."

"Yes" Blaine said. "I mean… I am. I know. But I have a good reason to be."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Kurt asked.

"Yes" Blaine nodded.

Kurt waited in silence for a while, trying to figure out what was wrong with Blaine. He hoped that it was nothing serious. Just when everything seemed so perfect and he was ready to talk about his feelings…

"Are you going to tell me?" Kurt asked when it became obvious that Blaine wouldn't talk.

"Of course" Blaine said. "Damn, it's so hard…"

"Oh, no, no, no" Kurt said with wide eyes. "Please don't tell me you have a boyfriend again."

"What?" Blaine looked at him in confusion before he finally remembered what Kurt was talking about. "Oh, that. No. That's not what I want to talk about."

"Okay" Kurt nodded.

"Right" Blaine said.

"Blaine?"

"Hm?"

"I'm listening."

"Oh, yes, of course" Blaine said. He sat back down and took Kurt's hand into his. "You know, I… I keep thinking about the two of us."

Kurt's heart skipped a beat. Was it possible that Blaine felt the same way and he wanted to tell him how much he loved him? Was it possible that it happened right tonight when he was ready to tell Blaine everything? It would be so magical.

"So… Uhm… You're a great roommate" Blaine said in the end.

The butterflies disappeared form his stomach right in that moment. Kurt blinked a few times and took a deep breath, hoping that he wouldn't burst into tears too soon. Roommate? Was that all he meant for Blaine? Another guy he shared the rent with? That couldn't be happening...

"Oh, shit" Blaine muttered. He screwed up again. How could he be so stupid? Kurt was so sensitive and now he would cry because of Blaine. Great. He wanted to punch himself so badly. "Please don't cry. I want to tell you something very important but I guess I used the wrong words."

"I hope so because this can't get any worse" Kurt said.

"Okay" Blaine said and took a deep breath. He could do this. He was an adult man and he was perfectly capable of talking correctly. "So I think we have a great time together. And since we're having a baby together…"

Oh, no. Not again. He had to figure out what to do, fast, because Kurt was seemingly ready to cry and not in happiness.

"Forget about the baby" Blaine said quickly. "What I want to tell you… Well, I-I can't stop thinking about you."

Much better. The tears disappeared from Kurt's eyes and… was that a smile? That's it!

"I know that I'm stupid sometimes. Okay, most of the time. But you make me feel like nobody else before and… And I think I'm in love with you. I want to…"

Blaine had no choice to say anything more because Kurt pushed him back on the couch so fast and with so much strength that Blaine could do nothing but watch him in surprise. For a whole second, until Kurt climbed over him and pressed his lips to Blaine's.

Blaine forgot what he wanted to say or what they had been talking about before this happened. He didn't care, he didn't care about anything because Kurt's lips on his felt so right. He missed this so much. He couldn't believe he had stupidly kept himself away from Kurt when kissing him felt so wonderful.

He didn't remember how they ended up in Kurt's bed naked but it really didn't matter. He could finally stop thinking about Kurt because he was right here in his arms. And it felt so wonderful. Blaine's hands slowly discovered the perfect body beside him like the first night they had shared. It felt so familiar but also so new. He laughed and inhaled the sweet scent of Kurt before gently pushing him down onto the mattress, his mind full of ideas of what they could do tonight.

Then his eyes landed on Kurt's stomach and Blaine froze.

"What's wrong?" Kurt asked as he pushed himself up.

"The baby" Blaine said.

"It's fine" Kurt said easily and grabbed the back of Blaine's neck again.

"But…" Blaine grabbed Kurt's hands and pushed them away, worried that they might do something stupid.

"Blaine, it's fine" Kurt said slowly.

"What if we hurt the baby?" Blaine asked.

"We won't" Kurt said.

"But…"

"Okay. Lie down" Kurt said impatiently.

"But…"

"Relax" Kurt said. He was seemingly more confident than Blaine. "Close your eyes and don't think about the baby."

"I just… Oh!"

It was hard to think when Kurt was above him again, massaging his cock. That was so not fair. But they had to be cool because if something happened to the baby...

"The baby is well protected. It's like… mozzarella" Kurt said.

"Did you just compare our child to a mozzarella?" Blaine asked.

"I'm just trying to show you that the baby is fine in there and nothing will happen to it if we have sex because it's surrounded by a lot of water" Kurt said.

"Hm. Do we have mozzarella in the fridge…"

"Later" Kurt said impatiently. "You can eat as much as you want but not now. Now..."

He leaned down and ran his tongue down Blaine's chest.

"Now I want you."

Blaine was lost. For a brief second, he was worried about the baby but then he figured out what Kurt wanted to do and it was so good and he missed him so badly… So he trusted Kurt and believed that the baby would be fine.

He couldn't wait for the moment when Kurt was finally ready. It seemed like forever but he knew that it was necessary. He didn't want to hurt Kurt, he had to be prepared, so Blaine couldn't cause him any pain. He had to be patient. And think of dead kittens or something because he was pretty sure that he wouldn't last too long if Kurt kept rubbing himself to his cock like this.

"I-I…"

"Sh" Kurt silenced him. "Stop worrying. Just enjoy."

And that was exactly what they were going to do for sure. Blaine had never seen Kurt like this. His cheeks were red, his eyes filled with lust and he was just so...

"God" Blaine moaned suddenly.

Kurt pushed himself down onto his cock so suddenly that Blaine was afraid that he might come from just that movement. His body surprised him that it didn't happen, he felt so close already. But he had to hold himself back and take care of Kurt at first.

He grabbed Kurt's waist, careful not to do anything stupid but hard enough to feel the hot skin and the muscles under it. Whatever Kurt said, he looked wonderful. He couldn't look any better. He was perfect. Everything he did was perfect.

Kurt was surely aware of that because he smiled as he slowed down a bit and leaned down to kiss Blaine. Blaine tightened his grip on Kurt's waist and reached up with his free hand to grab Kurt's hair. That beautiful, smooth hair… And that smell.

Blaine whined when Kurt pulled back and reached after him, but Kurt shook his head, still smiling. A second later Blaine understood what Kurt wanted. He pushed himself back and sped up again, moaning in pleasure as Blaine's cock hit his prostate. Blaine grabbed Kurt's cock without hesitation and squeezed it.

Only seconds later, Kurt cried out and pushed himself down onto Blaine so hard that it pushed Blaine over the edge. They came at the same time… How could this be any more perfect?

They were both breathing heavily for a while, just watching each other in silence. There were no words to describe this feeling. They had been waiting for this for months and now they didn't even know why when it was how things were supposed to happen. That was what made them complete.

Kurt's legs started shaking, so Blaine helped him lie down beside him. He pulled Kurt into his arms and kissed his forehead.

"That was so…"

"I know" Blaine nodded. "I know."

Kurt looked at him and took a deep breath.

"I love you" he whispered.

"I love you, too" Blaine said.

He didn't want to ruin the moment but he felt like he should say something. But what? Blaine knew that he said stupid things in the worst moments and he didn't want to ruin this one. He should just keep his mouth shut.

"No more secrets" he said before he could stop himself.

He watched Kurt carefully, hoping that he didn't say anything wrong. It was hard when Kurt was so sensitive most of the time. Apparently, it seemed like this one wasn't that kind of moment. Kurt smiled and moved closer to Blaine, giving him a small kiss.

"No more secrets" he said.

Blaine put his hand on Kurt's stomach and he felt something move under his touch. He looked down and smiled as the baby kicked him again.

"The baby is moving" he said.

"Yeah" Kurt smiled as he looked down. "I guess she's happy, too."

It almost went unnoticed by Blaine. He was so happy that they finally sorted things out and he was able to hold Kurt in his arms again. It didn't hit him for a few long moments. He just kept smiling at Kurt's baby bump and he felt like he was the luckiest person of the world.

But then his brain finally processed the information.

"Wait…" He sat up and frowned. "Did you say…"

Kurt bit his lip nervously. He was caught.

"She? You mean…" Blaine looked at Kurt's stomach again as if he thought he would find the answer here. "It's a girl?"

"No?" Kurt said uncertainly.

"It's a girl!" Blaine cried out.

"Yeah. I mean, maybe. It can be a girl. Or a boy" Kurt said, trying to save himself. He knew what Blaine thought about this.

"It's a girl! We're having a daughter!" Blaine said.

"You're scaring me" Kurt said carefully. He couldn't tell if Blaine was happy or upset. Or simply surprised.

"Wait" Blaine said and turned to look at Kurt again. "You know the baby's gender."

"And now you do, too" Kurt said.

"You… you went back to Sebastian, alone, and asked him about it?" Blaine asked. "I can't believe you did this. I thought we had an agreement!"

"Okay, first of all, we didn't have an agreement. You didn't want to know the baby's gender but it doesn't mean I agreed with you" Kurt said. "And I didn't go back to Sebastian without you."

"But how..."

"Oh, come on, it was so obvious. You didn't see?" Kurt asked.

"Was I supposed to see anything?" Blaine asked in a small voice.

"It was hard not to" Kurt snorted.

Blaine laid down again and closed his eyes. He remembered now. The last time when they had visited Sebastian. They had all seen it. But… how could he not see it?

"So you kept this from me since then" he said in the end.

"I'm sorry, Blaine" Kurt said. "I didn't want to tell you, I swear. I know how important it was for you and I ruined everything."

Blaine looked at Kurt in surprise. He didn't blame Kurt. How could he? It wasn't like he did something wrong. Sure, Blaine hadn't wanted to know the baby's gender but not because he hadn't been curious. He simply thought that the baby deserved its privacy.

But it really didn't matter anymore. It was girl. He was going to have a daughter. A beautiful little girl.

"A girl…" he muttered, smiling. He already loved the idea. He had always wanted a daughter.

"You aren't angry?" Kurt asked uncertainly.

"Why should I be?" Blaine laughed. "It's a girl!"

Kurt blinked in surprise. He was secretly worried that Blaine might have lost his mind because that was the last thing he expected from him. But Blaine seemed truly happy and Kurt slowly believed that it was true.

"Yes. It's a girl" Kurt smiled. "Isn't it wonderful?"

"It is" Blaine smiled.

"I can buy her the most beautiful outfits…"

"She can be a dancer…"

"She'll sing like an angel…"

"I hope she won't have my hair" Blaine said in concern.

"You have beautiful hair" Kurt said. "I wouldn't mind."

"Seriously?" Blaine asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Sure" Kurt shrugged. "I want our daughter to have your hair."

Blaine wasn't worried about the baby's hair anymore. If Kurt liked it, he would be fine with it, too. Now that he thought about it, he could easily imagine their daughter with dark, curly hair, in case she had Kurt's eyes. It would be so beautiful.

"Are you alright?" Kurt asked after a while. Blaine was so quiet.

"Of course" Blaine nodded. "Everything is so wonderful."

Kurt smiled and kissed Blaine again. He couldn't agree more. He was so happy that they were finally together, really together, without secrets and fear. They had lost some time but who cared? They had some more time before the baby's birth to enjoy, just the two of them, and then they would be a family and everything would be a lot better. Okay, he knew that the first months wouldn't be easy, he wasn't that naive to think that it would be like before, that they would sleep as much as they wanted or they could go out whenever they wanted to. But he would also have something he wanted to much. A child. It was worth of the discomfort.

"So you don't regret having a baby?" Kurt asked.

"No" Blaine shook his head. "I'm not saying that I wasn't scared at first but I'm ready for a child."

"That's good to hear" Kurt smiled.

"Will it be as hard as they say?" Blaine asked.

"I think we should be prepared for the worst and then we'll be fine" Kurt said.

Blaine's eyes widened. Was it really that bad?

"Relax" Kurt laughed. "We have each other. And I'm sure that our friends would be happy to help, too. Finn and Rachel already told me that they want to have some private time with their niece."

"That's really nice of them" Blaine said.

Blaine's brain was working unusually well that night because something caught his attention again. Something that seemed so stupid at first but still...

"What's wrong?" Kurt frowned when Blaine pulled away from him.

"Finn and Rachel" Blaine said.

"What's wrong with them?" Kurt asked.

"Finchel" Blaine said. It made sense. Kurt had talked about that mysterious guy so much when he had been with Jack but then, nothing. As if he had never existed. And maybe that was true…

"Oops" Kurt said.

"Seriously?" Blaine asked. "I can't believe you made up a boyfriend just to make me jealous."

"Not a boyfriend but a very good looking friend who might have been interested in me" Kurt said. "Big difference. Besides, you very dating somebody else. What was I supposed to do?"

"Tell me the truth?" Blaine offered.

"Oh, come on" Kurt rolled his eyes. "Weren't you the one who played with me?"

"That's…"

"Right" Kurt glared at him. "I had to know if it's real."

"You knew…"

"Of course I knew" Kurt said. "You're so easy to read, Blaine."

"You're not the first one who tells me this" Blaine muttered.

He was so adorable. Kurt pushed himself up from the bed, put his arms around Blaine from behind and kissed his neck.

"If it makes you feel better, I still love you" he said.

Blaine turned around to face him. Maybe he had been angry for a second but it disappeared so easily.

"Are you hungry?" he asked. "I can make you something…"

"No" Kurt smirked. "I want something else from you."

Blaine gulped nervously as Kurt reached for his cock again. He had a feeling that this one was going to be a long night.


	23. Chapter 23

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I successfully survived all of my exams, even my final exam! Two more years of work and I'm going to get my PhD degree.**

 **Thank you for your patience!**

Being with Kurt was wonderful. It really was. Blaine loved those romantic moments they shared with each other, he loved having dinner with Kurt, he loved talking to Kurt, he loved having Kurt in his arms… But he was so exhausted. Kurt was horny all the time. Blaine had thought that it was just temporary, that Kurt would calm down a bit after a while, but it never happened. Kurt wanted sex before work, after work, in the middle of the night… Blaine tried to give Kurt what he needed but it was just insane. They were young and in love, that was right, but Blaine also needed time to recover. And sleep.

Unfortunately, Kurt didn't need so much rest anymore. Now that the morning sickness was just a bad memory, Kurt was full of energy. He did all of his work and then he had enough time for shopping and cooking. Blaine told him to leave the housework for him because he didn't want Kurt to do something stupid but Kurt was mostly done with it before Blaine came home. And then he practically jumped into Blaine's arms.

Blaine rubbed his eyes and suppressed a yawn. Kurt had woken him up again that morning because he couldn't sleep and thought that they could use that extra time before work to do something useful. Blaine could have used that time to sleep some more because sleeping was definitely useful. And necessary to survive. At least for Blaine.

Living on so much coffee definitely wasn't the best he could do but he also didn't want to tell Kurt that sometimes he was just too much for him. Okay, most of the time. Blaine wasn't lucky enough to enjoy the extra energy of the second trimester. He just became more and more exhausted with every passed day and he found it hard to focus on his job. Or anything else. Kurt talked to him a lot but he barely paid attention. Sometimes he found himself zooming out and he was pretty sure that he would fall asleep one time while listening to Kurt. He had to figure out how to keep Kurt busy without having sex with him four or five times a day. Too bad it didn't seem like Kurt had other ideas for how to spend his time when Blaine wanted to sleep.

"Somebody looks tired."

Blaine looked up from his mug and smiled at Sam. Since Blaine had figured out that Sam and Kurt were friends, he talked a lot more to the model. Sam was a great guy, a simple one but always honest. Blaine loved that in people.

"I don't have much sleep nowadays" Blaine admitted.

"Yeah, I heard about that" Sam smirked. "Congratulations. It was about time you two sorted things out."

"I know" Blaine nodded. His mug was empty again. How was it possible? He didn't remember drinking all of his coffee…

"So I guess you two are enjoying life" Sam said. "Oh, that wonderful time! When everything is so simple, when you just want to lock yourself into our apartment and…"

Blaine groaned and buried his face into his palms.

"What's wrong?" Sam frowned.

"Kurt" Blaine said simply. He had no energy left for explanations.

"What's wrong with Kurt?" Sam asked.

"He's horny" Blaine said. "Like always."

"That's great!" Sam smiled.

"Ugh" Blaine groaned. He was so tired. Maybe he could have some sleep here in the cafeteria. That table seemed so comfortable…

"What?" Sam frowned.

"I'm so tired" Blaine said. "I want to sleep so badly but it seems like Kurt doesn't need any sleep anymore. Like he lives on sex or something. I'm not sure I can keep up with him any longer. It's just too much."

"Of course it is. He's pregnant and didn't have any sex for… how long? Three months?" Sam asked.

"A little more" Blaine muttered.

"See? He'll calm down with time. You only have to survive that" Sam said. "Do you want one more coffee?"

"Are you sure that it won't last forever?" Blaine asked.

"Of course not. Soon he won't even be able to move" Sam said easily. "Besides, this period never lasts too long. Days become boring, you two just live beside each other and one day you realize that you haven't had any sex for a whole month."

Blaine pushed himself up from the table to look at his friend.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked.

Sam sighed and took his place beside Blaine. He didn't say anything, just stared down at the table.

"I guess Mercedes and you have problems" Blaine said. It was so weird. His friends never talked to him about their love lives. Probably because Blaine was known as the totally hopeless type. But Sam thought that he might help him and he was determined to do so.

"It's just…" Sam sighed and shook his head. "I don't know. I mean, I still love her, she's really great but…"

"But?" Blaine asked.

"Do you think it's because we waited until our wedding night?" Sam asked suddenly.

Blaine had no idea what to say. He hadn't even known that Sam and Mercedes were married. It seemed so weird, maybe because Sam just wasn't that married type. Was he? Blaine just realized how much he didn't know the other man. But that wasn't what surprised him the most. Okay, he knew that Mercedes was a little old fashioned, but Sam? No, Blaine couldn't imagine that those two had waited months or worse, years, for their first time.

"So you two didn't…" Blaine motioned towards Sam but couldn't really express with words what he wanted to say. It was simply unbelievable. Why would a young couple do that to themselves? It was simply torture.

"No" Sam shook his head. "She wanted to wait and I respect her decisions. So I waited, too."

"You're insane" Blaine said honestly.

"Well, yeah, it was hard at first but then we got engaged and were busy with the wedding planning. Then we got married and were on honeymoon for two weeks. Oh, those weeks… I'll never forget them" Sam sighed.

Blaine wasn't sure if he should bother Sam who was seemingly lost in his thoughts or just leave him. And have a few minutes of sleep… No. Sam needed him. It was a serious conversation, probably the first one Blaine had with another grown-up male and he didn't want to screw up. He wanted to help.

"So something happened after your wedding night?" Blaine offered.

"We were fine for a few years" Sam said quietly. "Okay, we had fights like every other couple but we sorted things out."

"Do you fight a lot?" Blaine asked. He thought that it was the problem. It was his and Kurt's problem most of the time, so he couldn't imagine that something else could get between people. It was just how relationships worked, right?

"Not at all" Sam smiled weakly.

"I don't get it" Blaine said. What else could bother Sam?

"I think we're getting bored of each other" Sam said. "We don't go on dates anymore, we barely talk to each other. And it's a miracle if we have sex three times a year."

"Wait. Are you serious?" Blaine asked in surprise. Suddenly he was totally awake.

"Yes" Sam sighed heavily.

"But why?" Blaine asked.

"I don't know" Sam shrugged. "Sometimes she's just too tired. Sometimes I'm too tired. Weeks pass and we don't do anything about it."

"Why not?" Blaine asked. Nothing Sam said made sense.

"I guess because it's easier" Sam shrugged.

"Well, I don't know much about relationships…"

"I figured out" Sam snorted.

Blaine simply ignored the comment.

"...But they say that you have to work on it if you want to make it work" Blaine continued. "When was the last time you bought her flowers?"

"Uhm…"

"Or took her to her favorite restaurant?"

"I…"

"See? You have to work harder to keep her" Blaine said. "You said that you loved her. Damn, you were willing to wait years for that woman and now you're giving up so easily?"

"Why are you yelling at me?" Sam asked.

Blaine blinked in surprise. He was standing beside Sam now and he had no idea how he had gotten there. Or why he was yelling because Sam was right, he really was.

"I'm sorry" Blaine muttered. "I think…"

He sat back down and rubbed his eyes.

"I want to sleep so badly" he said.

Sam smiled and put a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"It's not as bad as it seems" Sam said. "At least you'll be prepared for the first months with your newborn. She won't let you sleep either."

"You might be right" Blaine nodded. Then it hit him. "You know that it's a girl?"

Sam turned pale within a blink.

"Please, don't tell Kurt" he said quickly. "I promised him that I won't tell you and you know him. He'll kill me."

"Relax. I already know" Blaine smiled. "I'm just surprised that everybody else knows."

"Well, you didn't want to know..."

"Because it's not right!" Blaine said.

Sam sighed and shook his head. Maybe Kurt and Blaine enjoyed these fights but he was wise enough to ignore them. At least when it wasn't about Mercedes. He decided that it was better to leave it to Blaine to think whatever he wanted and focused on his own problems.

~ o ~

When Blaine went home from work that evening, he wanted nothing but a good sleep. It had been such a long day… He wasn't even hungry, he just wanted to lie down and sleep until the next morning. Unfortunately, Kurt was already home and seemingly not tired at all.

"Hey" Kurt smiled as he sneaked his arms around Blaine's neck and kissed him. "I missed you."

"I missed you too" Blaine said. Okay, maybe Kurt was annoying sometimes… Most of the time, it was still Kurt. His Kurt. His wonderful boyfriend.

"I made you dinner" Kurt said. "Are you hungry? Or… Do you want to do something else?"

Oh, not again. Blaine was pretty sure that he wasn't ready for that. He loved Kurt, he really did, but it was simply insane. His body was still sore from the two rounds from the morning, he just couldn't do that again. He was pretty sure that he wouldn't be able to move the next day if he let Kurt get what he wanted.

Suddenly, he got a wonderful idea. Maybe a crazy one but if it worked… Yes, he had to try. He had to find out how to help Kurt get rid of that extra energy without using him again and again, for both of their sake. They were doing so well, Blaine didn't want to ruin that. Luckily, he started to figure out how Kurt worked and what he had to do to get what he wanted without hurting his hormonal boyfriend. Oh, yes. It would work for sure.

"Actually, I have an idea" Blaine smiled.

"Oh, really?" Kurt smiled and leaned close to kiss Blaine again.

Blaine grabbed Kurt's hands and gently pushed him away to look into his eyes.

"Come on. Let's go!" he said.

Kurt blinked in surprise. That was definitely not what he expected.

"You want to go out?" Kurt asked uncertainly.

"Of course I do. It's such a beautiful evening! Why should we sit at home?" Blaine smiled. He hoped that it would work because he wouldn't have any more energy left after this.

"Okay" Kurt said. "Where do you want to go?"

"It's a surprise" Blaine said.

Before Kurt could protest, Blaine ushered him out of the apartment and locked the door. Then he grabbed Kurt's hand again and led him down the stairs.

"We have to get a few things from the mall" Blaine said when they walked downstairs.

Kurt didn't know what Blaine was doing. He started dragging him down the street as if he wanted to walk to the mall. It was insane, it was too far away, especially for Kurt who was a lot slower now that he had to carry the extra weight of the baby. It would tire him out completely.

"Are you sure you want to go to the mall right now?" Kurt asked after a while.

"Sure" Blaine said. "We have to start shopping for the baby. We have nothing for her! I saw those adorable baby clothes the other day, you have to see them too."

"Wait. You want to buy baby clothes? Right now?" Kurt asked in surprise.

"I do" Blaine said determinedly.

They walked down the streets in silence. Sometimes they stopped when Kurt needed a break, Blaine didn't want anything to happen to him or the baby after all but he needed a peaceful night, too, and he was willing to try this if there was a little chance that it might work. They finally reached their destination and Blaine led Kurt to the first shop.

"They have so beautiful clothes" he said and pushed Kurt inside.

He did the right thing, he knew. Once Kurt was in the shop, he couldn't resist the clothes. Blaine took a seat and watched as his boyfriend walked around, grabbing everything he thought their baby would like.

"I think the other one was better" Blaine commented.

"Shouldn't we get one more from that?" he asked next.

He didn't even have to move. Kurt went through the whole collection twice, showed Blaine what he thought they would need and went back to get other pieces when Blaine didn't like something. He didn't even notice that Blaine stayed in his seat the whole time.

They left the shop with many shopping bags. Blaine felt a lot more rested than before and Kurt seemed a lot more tired. But Blaine wasn't done here.

"I know what you need, babe" he said. "Ice cream!"

"Oh, that would be great!" Kurt said excitedly.

Of course. He couldn't resist a large bowl of ice cream. Not since he was pregnant. Blaine bought their desserts but before Kurt could sit down, he grabbed his hand again and pulled him away from the chairs.

"We could eat it on our way home" he said.

"You want to walk again?" Kurt asked.

"Sure. We won't have much time for ourselves after the baby's birth. We have to enjoy these moments now that we can" Blaine said.

And Kurt didn't see what was going on, again. He was simply happy that Blaine cared about him so much and didn't need more. And Blaine was happy that he could make Kurt satisfied without having to have sex with him a few times. So it wasn't even a big lie.

"Blaine, we're going the opposite way" Kurt said and suppressed a yawn. He was already tired, Blaine could tell.

"I need to take care of one more thing" Blaine said.

"Couldn't we just go home? It's really late" Kurt whined.

It wasn't, actually, it was barely past 9. But Kurt moved a lot more than usually and he felt a lot more tired than normally.

Blaine didn't say anything. He led Kurt to his favorite florist and bought him a bouquet of roses, remembering what he had told Sam earlier that day. He might have been exhausted but he didn't want to find himself in that situation a few years later. He wanted to be happy with Kurt forever.

"Oh, Blaine, they are beautiful" Kurt said.

"Just like you" Blaine said.

He reached out to wipe the tears off of Kurt's cheeks and kissed him. Kurt often cried when he was happy but Blaine had learned how to handle it.

"Do you want to go home?" Blaine asked.

"Oh, yes. It's been a wonderful evening but I'm so tired" Kurt said.

Blaine smiled and pulled Kurt close. That was his goal.

Kurt was more exhausted than Blaine expected. He moved so slowly when they got home, he took care of the flowers and then went to shower. He spent eternity in there and Blaine was getting worried about him when Kurt finally came back, slightly fresher than earlier.

"I'll wait for you out here" Kurt said.

Blaine gulped nervously. Kurt surely didn't have any energy left for that, right?

Blaine decided to shower before he talked to Kurt, so he had some time to figure out how exactly to tell his boyfriend that they had to slow down a bit because it was too much fur Blaine. It wasn't that easy at all. Although Kurt tried really hard not to fight over the smallest things, he was so sensitive, Blaine could never be sure what to expect from him.

"At least he won't bother to you for a while if you hurt him" Blaine told himself. He hoped that they wouldn't go so far this time. He liked when everything was fine between them.

He sighed in relief when he stepped out of the bathroom, only to find Kurt lying on the couch, already asleep. Blaine smiled and walked to his boyfriend. He hesitated for a second, not knowing what to say. He didn't want to leave Kurt here, it was too uncomfortable and Kurt's back hurt so often because of the pregnancy, he deserved to sleep in a real bed. But he was sleeping so peacefully, Blaine didn't want to bother him either. He decided that he would carry Kurt in the end. Kurt could be a really heavy sleeper when he was exhausted, he probably wouldn't even notice anything.

Blaine was careful as he lifted Kurt off of the couch and pulled him close. Kurt didn't even move as he walked with him to the bedroom they now shared or when Blaine put him down. Kurt was already so deep in his sleep that he didn't notice anything.

Blaine sighed happily as he jumped into the bed and pulled Kurt close again. He was exhausted but he was pretty sure that he wouldn't be interrupted in his sleep that night. Now that he learned that he should use his head instead of getting into pointless fights with Kurt, life was so easy. He couldn't believe he had needed so much time to figure out what to do. But now he was an expert of his boyfriend and he was sure that he would understand his baby daughter just as easily.


	24. Chapter 24

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Thank you for the lots of reviews you left for the previous chapter!**

"Stay still. That's it!"

Kurt smiled as he watched Blaine. It was Blaine's idea that he should join him and see how he worked. Kurt hadn't been sure if it was a good idea but he didn't regret coming with him in the end. It didn't seem like the rules were too strict here. They had easily come in and nobody said a word about Kurt watching them while they were working. The models were surely used to having so many people around. Kurt wondered how hard it was to focus on what Blaine told them when there were so many noises in the background bothering them. He was used to working in his own little office and nobody disturbed him, not when they knew that Kurt needed privacy. He was pretty sure that he couldn't have done his job properly if he had had to have so many people around.

Blaine was different. Kurt rarely saw him so carefree. He was often lost in his thoughts when he thought that Kurt didn't pay attention. Kurt also knew that it was part of his job, that he tried to come up new ideas for the agency. He had been working here for a long while, they trusted him and often gave him a chance to do whatever he wanted. He decided what the background should be like or what the models should do. Kurt also knew that Blaine picked out their outfits when he had a chance. He had to admit that Blaine did a great job here. As a fashion designer, he knew what he was talking about. Blaine was a talented photographer, he paid attention to the smallest details and his work was absolutely perfect.

Kurt leaned closer when Blaine crouched down, his eyes fixed on the other man's butt. Blaine was wearing his dark jeans, Kurt's favorites. They were tight and fit him perfectly. Blaine's butt was the most beautiful Kurt had ever seen or touched, and from this angle he could see them perfectly. Oh, he wanted to touch Blaine so badly. It was hard to hold himself back when Blaine was so sexy in this outfit. He had to remind himself that they weren't alone, that Blaine wouldn't be happy if he did something stupid.

Then Kurt wondered how Blaine could work with so many models around. These guys were so hot and Kurt could tell easily that at least two of them were gay. So they could have been interested in Blaine. Kurt felt a wave of jealousy and needed all of his willpower not to go down there and show everyone that Blaine was his. His rational side knew that Blaine would never cheat on him, so they were safe of temptation, no matter how many sexy men were around, but he was pregnant and his stupid hormonal mind didn't let him forget the possibility that someone might try to take Blaine away from him. Kurt's eyes were on the other people now, trying to find any sign that somebody wanted to seduce his boyfriend. Blaine trusted people so easily, he had to keep his eyes open for him.

It was a bad idea. As he watched people, he found more and more staring at his boyfriend. The rational side of his mind told him that it was natural, that Blaine was working and it was their job to pay attention, but he found himself seeing more in those looks than innocence. Yes, they were surely aware of how sexy Blaine was and if Kurt wasn't careful, they could cause them a lot of trouble.

"Are you enjoying the show?"

Kurt blinked in surprise. Blaine wasn't working anymore, he was standing right in front of him. Was the shooting already over?

"I really like these jeans" Kurt said the first thing that came into his mind.

Blaine smiled and put his arms around Kurt.

"I'm hungry. What about you?" Blaine asked.

"I could eat" Kurt replied.

"Or…" Blaine started.

"Or what?" Kurt asked immediately, food and everything else quickly forgotten.

Blaine looked around and then turned to Kurt with that mischievous smile on his face.

"The place is all ours" he whispered.

Kurt leaned forward and looked around. He knew what Blaine meant and he liked the idea. More than that, he thought that it was a perfect idea. Just the two of them, the risk of getting caught hanging over their heads… They had to do it.

"I'm yours" he said quickly.

Blaine wasn't surprised. Kurt said never no to an opportunity of having sex, although he seemed to torture Blaine less since Blaine made him take long walks every day, so Kurt wasn't so full of energy anymore. It also meant that sometimes it wasn't Kurt who made the first step. Okay, it barely happened but still… Blaine felt like he was getting himself back.

He tore off Kurt's shirt and pulled him down onto the blanket still lying on the floor. There were also flowers and everything they would need but it was so not important in that moment. They were here, they could get caught in any second and it was so exciting. He couldn't believe that it was happening, that they were so bold, but it didn't matter in the moment. He was too turned on to care about the consequences.

"Somebody might catch us" Kurt whispered between kisses but his hands didn't stop for a second. He quickly unbuttoned Blaine's shirt and pulled it down from his shoulder, so he could kiss the smooth skin.

"I don't care" Blaine replied.

He climbed over Kurt and kissed him again. He enjoyed the soft noises of pleasure Kurt made and he had to hold himself back not to do anything stupid. He had to remind himself that the baby was there and he had to be careful not to hurt her. He wanted Kurt but he wasn't an idiot.

"I need more" Kurt moaned.

Of course he wanted, Blaine thought. And he wasn't the only one. He smiled and after giving one more kiss to Kurt, he pulled back to free his boyfriend from his pants.

"What are you doing?"

Blaine froze immediately. He knew this voice. And Kurt knew it, too. Blaine bit his lip and slowly turned his head, knowing that his face was scarlet from embarrassment. That was what he was so afraid of. Okay, not afraid enough to stop in time.

"Seriously, guys, I'm happy for you, but this is insane" Sam said as he walked closer. "You have to stop. Now."

"You're right" Kurt muttered as he quickly stood up and looked around, searching for his shirt. "We just…"

"It could have been your boss" Sam told Blaine. "It could have been worse. Like… Joe. Do you have any idea what they would have done?"

Blaine was pretty sure that Joe would have made a video of the two of them and threatened Blaine with it. Blaine would have been in a lot of trouble. How could he be so stupid? He knew that it was insane but it had seemed like such a great idea.

"We're sorry" Kurt said.

"Very good" Sam nodded. "Get dressed. Both of you."

He stood there, his arms crossed in front of his chest, waiting for the other men to move. Kurt quickly pulled up his shirt and helped Blaine do the same because his hands were shaking too badly to do it himself.

"I hope you won't do it in front of your daughter" Sam said next.

"What? Do you think that we would…" Blaine started but Sam silenced him with one glance.

"You're idiots. I should tell Mercedes" Sam said as he turned to Kurt.

"No!" Kurt said quickly. "Please, don't tell her. She would kill me."

Sam smiled. Mercedes was just like that but he loved that in her.

"Fine" he sighed in the end. It wasn't like he would talk about this ever. He would never betray his friends but the others didn't have to know. "I owe Blaine, so I guess we're fine."

"Why?" Kurt frowned.

"Because he saved my marriage" Sam said. "Now get out of here, both of you. I'll be late from my date if I don't hurry but I can't leave you two alone."

"What are you talking about?" Kurt asked again.

"Let's say Blaine opened my eyes and let me see what I was doing wrong" Sam said. "Thanks, dude."

"I have no idea what you're talking about" Blaine muttered. He had been so tired when they had had that conversation, he didn't remember what he had told Sam at all. At least it worked.

"Was something wrong with their marriage?" Kurt asked as they walked out of the room. "Mercedes never told me."

"Don't worry. I took care of it" Blaine smiled as he put an arm around Kurt.

"You're amazing" Kurt smiled and kissed Blaine's cheek.

"No kissing" Sam said, grabbing their shoulders from behind to guide them towards the door. "You're unbelievable."

The other men laughed as they were guided to the front door. It was funny that Sam tried to be the responsible one when he had to be saved all the time.

~ o ~

"What if they won't like me?"

Blaine smiled and turned around to look at his worried boyfriend. Now that they were together again and everything seemed to be fine, he decided that it was time to introduce Kurt to his best friends. Apparently, Kurt seemed so nervous for some reason. Blaine knew that they would love his boyfriend, so Kurt had nothing to worry about.

"They'll love you" Blaine said as he walked to Kurt and pulled him into his arms. "Don't worry, babe. Wes and Jeff are my best friends. We grew up together."

"That doesn't mean they'll like me" Kurt muttered.

Blaine leaned close to give him a kiss, to make Kurt forget about his worries. It seemed to work. As Blaine pulled away, he could see that Kurt was a lot more relaxed.

"Come on. We don't want to be late" he said.

They arrived about twenty minutes later to the place where Blaine usually met his friends. They had found it when they had moved to New York and the place had quickly become their favorite. It was small and quiet, just what they needed. And it had been so close to their apartment. Blaine had moved out after a while but they still came here. It was still better than any other place they knew in the city.

Blaine led Kurt down the stairs and raised his hand to greet his friends when he spotted them at their usual table. He tightened his hand on Kurt's and led him to the others.

"Hey, guys" Blaine said.

"Hey, Blaine" Wes said and stood up to greet his friend. Then he turned to Kurt and smiled at him. "You must be Kurt."

"That's him" Blaine said proudly.

"So you're real" Wes laughed. "It's hard to believe that Blaine finally found someone who doesn't go insane from him."

"Very funny" Blaine muttered.

"He talks about you all the time" Wes continued.

"Wes!" Blaine hissed. He had to change topic, fast. He turned to Jeff who stayed in his seat and pulled Kurt closer to him. "Jeff, this is my boyfriend, Kurt."

"I know" Jeff said.

Kurt frowned. He had no idea what was wrong with Jeff. Or was he always like this? It seemed so rude, but he decided to leave it to him. Maybe Jeff was shy and needed time to get used to his presence.

"It's good to finally meet you" Kurt said. "Blaine told me a lot about you."

"Like what?" Wes asked. "Please, tell me he didn't share our high school pranks with you."

"Just some of them" Kurt laughed.

Wes was a great guy. Kurt found it so easy to talk to him. Wes was funny and didn't seem to feel uncomfortable around him at all. Not like Jeff. He was so quiet. He kept watching Kurt but he didn't join the conversation.

"I need another drink" Blaine said after a while. "Kurt, should I get you something?"

"An orange juice would be great" Kurt said.

"Of course" Blaine nodded. That was Kurt's favorite after all and Blaine ordered that for himself as well. He was glad he never drank, it was easy to go out with Kurt since none of them wanted alcohol, Kurt didn't have to feel like he was left out of something.

"I'll go with you" Wes said and stood up. "I need another beer. What about you, Jeff?"

"I'm fine" Jeff said.

Kurt gulped nervously. He didn't want to be left alone with Jeff but telling Blaine that he was scared of his best friend wouldn't do them any good. So he remained silent, telling himself that a few minutes alone with Jeff wouldn't kill him.

When the others were gone, Kurt turned to the other man, determined to have a small chat with him. He wanted to get to know Blaine's friends, maybe if he showed Jeff that he had nothing to worry about, he would be able to relax around him. The look Jeff gave him made Kurt forget what he wanted to talk about, though. Jeff seemed… he seemed like he was angry for some reason.

"Is there something wrong?" Kurt asked carefully.

"You are wrong" Jeff said suddenly.

"I have no idea what you're talking about" Kurt said. Why was Jeff talking to him like that?

"Seriously? We both know that you're just using him" Jeff spat. "You lied to him, you used him to get pregnant and when you realized that it wasn't as easy as it first seemed, you forced him to be with you."

"That's not true!" Kurt gasped.

"Blaine told me everything" Jeff snorted. "Maybe he thinks that this is what he wants but it's not true. He wasn't ready to have a child and you ruined everything. You're disgusting."

Kurt took a deep breath. Then another. And another. Jeff was so rude to him and he wasn't sure if he wouldn't start crying in the next second. Yes, people were cruel, he was used to them whispering behind his back or staring at him, but it was understandable. A man being pregnant was unusual, Kurt had known what it would be like before he got pregnant. But he wasn't a bad man. He didn't want to hurt Blaine, he wasn't using him and he wasn't with him because he needed a father for his baby but because he loved him.

"You don't understand a thing" Kurt said quietly.

"Oh, believe me, I understand everything perfectly" Jeff said.

Kurt couldn't take more. He stood up and quickly looked around, searching for the bathroom. He didn't want to give Jeff the satisfaction to see him cry. No. He had to get out of here and quickly as he could. Once he found the door he was searching for, he jumped up and practically ran through the room to get away from this cruel man as soon as possible.

Once he was safe and alone, he allowed himself to break down. He gripped the edge of the basin because he wasn't sure if he could stand on his feet anymore. Loud sobs were shaking his whole body and he found it hard to breath. Because it wasn't fair. Yes, he had lied to Blaine at the start but they had moved on. They were in love, they were perfectly fine and they were ready to raise their child together. Jeff knew nothing about them and he had no right to judge them.

"Kurt, what's wrong?"

Kurt blinked in surprise when he found himself in Blaine's arms. He hadn't heard him come after him.

"You're scaring me" Blaine said in worry. "What happened?"

Kurt didn't mean to say anything. He didn't want to cause any trouble, to see his boyfriend fight with his best friend because of him. But they had promised each other that they would be honest forever and Kurt found it impossible not to talk to Blaine.

So he opened his mouth and told Blaine everything. It was hard, he could barely talk because he was still crying, but Blaine seemed to understand him.

And he didn't like what he heard.

"It's fine, Blaine" Kurt said in the end when he saw how angry Blaine was. "He's right."

"No. He isn't" Blaine said.

"Please, don't say anything. I don't want you to fight because of me" Kurt said.

"I think it's something I should decide" Blaine said. "I'll take care of this."

"Blaine…"

But Blaine was already gone. Kurt quickly wiped his face and went after him before Blaine had a chance to do something stupid. He was late, though. When he walked out of the bathroom, Blaine was already back to their table. At least he didn't punch Jeff. Kurt knew that Blaine wasn't a violent person but he couldn't think straight when he was angry. And now Blaine was very angry.

"How dare you talk to him like that?" Blaine shouted.

"Blaine, stop!" Kurt cried out and ran to his boyfriend to put a calming hand on his shoulder.

"You know nothing!" Blaine continued. "You know absolutely nothing about us! And you have no right to make him cry."

"I just told him the truth" Jeff glared at him. He couldn't believe that Blaine was yelling at him.

"You know nothing about us!" Blaine said again. "Do me a favor and stay out of our lives. We're adults and we can handle our problems on our own. We don't need you to tell us what to do and I don't need a friend who hurts the man I love."

"Blaine, don't do anything stupid" Kurt said quickly because he was worried about what might come next.

"Stay away from us" Blaine said.

"But…"

"I don't want to see you again!" Blaine yelled. "You are disgusting, not Kurt. I can't believe I didn't see what you were like before."

"Blaine…"

"Let's go" Blaine said, his voice a lot calmer when he turned to Kurt. "I think we're done here."

Kurt knew that it was better to give Blaine time to calm down before talking to him about this. He would be able to convince Blaine to talk to Jeff, but not now. Now Blaine was too upset to listen. So he nodded and let Blaine led him out of the club.

"Blaine…"

"Not now, please" Blaine said tiredly. "Just not now."

Kurt nodded in understanding. He hoped that he would be able to help Blaine with this. Yes, he was upset as well, but he wanted the best for Blaine. He didn't want to see him so sad. He sighed and put an arm around Blaine. He wished this night had never happened.


	25. Chapter 25

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

Kurt watched Blaine in silence. They were lying in their bed in each other's arms but Kurt couldn't sleep. And he could tell, even in the darkness, that Blaine wasn't sleeping either. Kurt sighed and tightened his arms around Blaine. He wanted to help so badly but he had no idea what to say. Blaine had had a fight with his best friend because of him. If Kurt hadn't been pregnant, if he hadn't tricked Blaine that night, they would have been fine. It was all his fault.

He knew deep inside that he shouldn't feel bad, because Jeff wasn't right about him. The man didn't know him at all and he had had no right to talk to him like that. But he reminded Kurt what he had done to Blaine and he felt bad again. He had lied to Blaine, only because he had been impatient and followed his crazy idea. He didn't regret having a baby with Blaine but Jeff was right, he had forced Blaine into this and it wasn't right. Whatever Blaine said, he hadn't wanted a baby. Maybe he still didn't want the baby, he was only with Kurt because he didn't want to leave him when Kurt was pregnant with their child.

"It's not your fault" Blaine said quietly.

"Hm?" Kurt pushed himself up to look at Blaine.

"I know what you're thinking" Blaine smiled. "Don't blame yourself. He wasn't right about us."

"How do you know what I was thinking about?" Kurt asked.

"Because I know you" Blaine replied. "As I said, he wasn't right about us. He knows nothing."

Kurt sighed heavily. Whatever Blaine said, he knew deep inside that Jeff was right about them. About him. It was a lucky turn that he and Blaine had fallen in love but Kurt hadn't planned it like that. He had used Blaine the first night, because he wanted a baby. He had lied to him. And he felt still guilty. They had never discussed their problems, they had just jumped into this relationship. It didn't feel right. What if they made a mistake by letting everything happen to them so simply, without talking about what they had done wrong? Yes, Jeff was right about his motives at the beginning but he didn't know that Kurt was truly in love with Blaine. And he wanted to make this work. He was pretty sure that he could live his whole life with Blaine, that he would never say goodbye to him.

"Hey, don't be sad" Blaine said gently.

"Maybe he was a little harsh but he was right" Kurt said.

"Kurt…"

"Please, listen to me" Kurt said. "He's right, I used you. I wanted this baby so badly that I didn't care. I saw the opportunity and took it. I didn't care about your feelings. I didn't even want to tell you about the baby. It was wrong."

"Well, it wasn't right, but we already discussed this" Blaine said.

"No, we didn't" Kurt shook his head. "I don't think we should just let it go so easily. I love you, Blaine, and I really want to make this work. I want to be with you forever, so I don't want any trouble. I think we should be honest about this. We should tell each other how we feel."

"I'm not angry with you anymore" Blaine said.

"Are you sure?" Kurt asked.

"Perfectly" Blaine smiled and tightened his arms around Kurt. "I already told you. Yes, I was angry at first but not because I didn't want the baby. It was because you lied to me."

Kurt looked away. He wished it had never happened. That he had trusted Blaine enough to talk to him honestly. Everything would have been different.

"I think I understand what it was like for you" Blaine continued. "People can be so crazy when they want a child."

"You have no idea" Kurt sighed. "I felt like I would die if I didn't get what I wanted. Immediately. I know it's crazy. I have no idea what happened to me."

"You wanted a family" Blaine shrugged.

"I wanted a child" Kurt said. "I turned 30 and I thought I would never find the right guy. I was scared that I would waste too much time and it would be too late for me to have a baby. That I would be all alone."

"You'll never be alone" Blaine smiled. "You have your family, your friends… And now you have me, too."

Kurt pushed himself away again, so he could look at Blaine's face. He had to know if it was true. He knew how he felt about Blaine and he hoped that Blaine loved him just as much. That he didn't stay with him only because of their baby.

"How many times do I have to tell you, Kurt? I love you" Blaine said.

"He said that you hadn't been ready for a child" Kurt said quietly. "Is it true? Did I ruin everything?"

"Kurt…"

"I ruined your life" Kurt shook his head and sighed heavily. "God, I was so selfish. I didn't see how it would affect your life. I only cared about myself."

"You didn't ruin my life" Blaine said. "How many times do I have to tell you? Okay, I freaked out a bit but it wasn't because I didn't feel ready for a baby. It's a huge thing. It's another person, someone we have to take care of for a very long time, and yes, it's scary. What if we do something wrong?"

"Believe me, we will do some things wrong" Kurt said. "A lot of things. Everybody makes mistakes."

"I'm not sure I wanted to know this" Blaine said.

"Blaine, we can't do everything right. People do mistake" Kurt shrugged. "My father is amazing but there were times when he didn't act like he was supposed to. But it's fine. Nobody is perfect."

"You might be right" Blaine said slowly.

"Because I am" Kurt smiled. "And I think you should talk to Jeff, too."

"No way" Blaine groaned.

"Blaine, he doesn't know me. He got every information about me from you" Kurt reminded him.

"So he hates you because of me?" Blaine asked. That was new. He thought that Jeff was simply crazy.

"You told him everything about us, right?" Kurt asked.

Blaine was silent for a while. He didn't remember how much he had told Jeff about Kurt and the baby, but he slowly started to remember. Kurt was right. He had told Jeff everything, especially when he had been angry with Kurt. When everything had become better, he hadn't had that much time for his friends anymore, so he hadn't had a chance to explain things to his friends. Now that he thought about it, it wasn't so hard to understand Jeff anymore.

"I screwed up" Blaine sighed.

"No, you didn't" Kurt said. "You just talked to him because he's your friend. You did nothing wrong."

"He hates you" Blaine replied.

"He doesn't even know me" Kurt said. "I think we should give him a chance to get to know me and everything will be fine."

"How do you want to make it work?" Blaine asked.

Kurt tried to figure out what would be the best. Convincing Jeff that he wasn't a monster was surely not that easy, but he believed that they could make things right. Together.

"I think you should talk to him first. Alone" Kurt said in the end. "Let him tell you what bothers him."

"I don't care what he thinks about us" Blaine muttered.

"Yes, you do" Kurt smiled and reached out to take Blaine's hand. "He's your friend and it bothers you that you had a fight. You have to discuss this, Blaine. I don't want to see you suffer."

"I'm so lucky to have you" Blaine said.

"Yes, you are" Kurt laughed. "Please, call him when you're ready. You can get over this. I know you can."

Blaine pulled Kurt close, so he could kiss him. He was truly lucky to have someone so amazing in his life. The man who loved him. Yes, he was probably the luckiest person of the world.

~ o ~

Kurt thought that Blaine would forgive his friend in no time, knowing that Blaine was such a good person, unable to be angry too long. But then he remembered what Blaine had been like with him when he had found out that Kurt had lied to him and realized that it wouldn't be that easy to get over the fight with Jeff. Blaine simply ignored him when Kurt tried to talk to him about the man or came up with a new topic, hoping that Kurt would forget about Jeff. He also called Rachel when he figured out that Kurt wouldn't give up so easily and asked her and Finn for a double date. Blaine wasn't sure if it was a good idea, but Kurt was always so worried about him, he hoped that a night with Kurt's stepbrother and his girlfriend would help Kurt forget about the trouble Jeff caused. As the day of the date came, Blaine realized that maybe it wasn't a good idea at all. That maybe he should have called Sam or even Santana, whoever who wasn't related to Kurt. The last time he and Finn had had a talk had been the night of Sebastian's birthday. Kurt still met his family frequently but Blaine never joined him. Finn could be really scary, especially when it was about the people he loved. Blaine wasn't sure if he was happy for them, although Kurt reassured him that he had nothing to worry about. The fact that Finn was a lot taller and probably stronger than him was enough to be afraid of the night.

"Come on, Blaine. Smile for me" Kurt said as he stepped behind his boyfriend and hugged him. His baby bump was getting bigger and bigger every single day and it became a problem when the two of them wanted to be close. It was normal, of course, but Kurt didn't want to accept the fact that it would only be harder in the last few weeks. He didn't want to slow down, in any meaning.

"I'm sorry" Blaine sighed and turned around to face the other man. He put a hand on Kurt's stomach, like every time he had a chance. Their baby moved a lot and Blaine was finally able to feel it. It was such an amazing experience. He wanted to enjoy it as long as he could.

"Are you still angry with Jeff?" Kurt asked. "He's your friend. You can discuss this. I know you can."

"I'll call him" Blaine said. "Someday. But it's not that."

"Oh?" Kurt asked in surprise.

"Yeah. Uhm… It's Finn" Blaine explained.

"What about Finn?" Kurt frowned.

"I don't think he likes me" Blaine admitted.

"Of course he likes you" Kurt smiled. "He's such a nice guy. You just have to get to know him."

Blaine sighed heavily. He had avoided Kurt's friends and family for a good while since he hadn't known what would happen to the two of them and he wasn't really good around strangers. Then he and Kurt had sorted things out and everything had become so wonderful so quickly that Blaine had forgotten that things might get complicated again. Like he had to meet Kurt's friends again. Those people who probably hated him. They most definitely hated him. If Jeff was so pissed, what would Finn do to him after seeing Blaine hurt his stepbrother? Blaine wished that had never happened. He had been such an idiot.

"I don't think it's a good idea" he said.

"Yes, it is" Kurt said and grabbed Blaine's shoulders from behind, gently pushing him forward. "Come on. We don't want to be late."

Kurt decided not to tell Blaine that Finn and Rachel had helped him spy on Blaine and Jack, so Blaine had nothing to be worried about. Finn was entirely on his side. He just wanted to see Kurt and the baby happy.

Blaine was so pale when they entered the restaurant that Kurt was worried that he might faint. He took slow, shaky steps towards the table where Rachel and Finn were already waiting for them.

"Hey, guys" Rachel greeted them when they got to the table. She hugged Kurt tightly for a second and when she pulled back, she put a hand on Kurt's baby bump. "It's huge!"

"And it's far from over" Kurt sighed.

"Is she awake?" Finn asked excitedly.

"No" Kurt shook his head.

"I want to feel her kick" Finn pouted like a child.

Blaine simply tried to stay invisible but he soon realized that it was impossible. Once Kurt was seated, everyone turned to look at him. Blaine gulped nervously, hoping more than ever that Finn didn't want to cause a scene and he would be saved from another fight. He had already had one a few days earlier. He didn't need anybody else to insult him or his family.

Finn didn't seem like he was about to say anything. That was strange. Blaine was perfectly sure that Finn hated him, with a good reason. Finn knew nothing about him that he had hurt Kurt several times. He surely wasn't a fan of Blaine.

"Come on, Blaine. Sit down" Finn smiled. "You aren't scared of me, are you?"

"Of course not. Why would I be?" Blaine said quietly and quickly sat down. Finn was a scary man, he didn't want to anger him.

"Most people are" Finn shrugged. "You know. Because of my size."

"But he's so sweet" Rachel smiled. "That's why I love him so much."

The two of them was an interesting couple for sure. For the first time, Blaine took his time just watching them. Finn was so much taller than Rachel but it seemingly didn't bother them. Either did the other differences. Finn seemed to be a quiet person while Rachel talked a lot. Even more than Kurt. But then again, it seemed like it was just how things should be like for the two of them. They were definitely in love.

"Blaine?"

Blaine blinked in surprise. Now everyone was watching him in silence and from the questioning look on Kurt's face became clear that he must have missed something.

"I'm sorry, I zoomed out a bit" Blaine said awkwardly. So much for making a good impression.

"I can tell" Kurt snorted.

"We were just asking you about the baby's name" Rachel repeated patiently. "Is it true that you haven't found the right name yet?"

"Uhm, yes" Blaine nodded. "It's really hard. How are we supposed to name her when we don't even know her? This is a serious decision. She has to live with the name we give her for the rest of her life."

"She can easily change it if she doesn't like it" Rachel said, waving her hand. "People do it all the time."

"I don't want our daughter to change her name" Blaine said.

"Me neither" Kurt said supportingly. "That's why we need more time to find the right name."

"You're so lucky to have a daughter" Rachel sighed. "I hope we'll have a baby girl, too. Naming girls is so much easier."

"I don't think so" Blaine smiled.

"It is for us. I already know what her name would be" Rachel shrugged.

"Barbra?" Kurt guessed.

"Obviously" Rachel said.

"After Barbra Streisand" Kurt explained Blaine. "Rachel's biggest idol."

"What about you, Finn?" Blaine asked, deciding that it was a good topic to start a conversation with Kurt's stepbrother and earn his trust. "Is that also what you want?"

"Yeah. I like it, too" Finn said shortly.

Kurt chose that exact moment to go out to the bathroom. Unfortunately, Rachel decided to go with him, so Blaine found himself in the worst situation possible: alone with Finn Hudson. He considered fleeing into the bathroom with Kurt but that wouldn't be a good way to impress Kurt's family and he wanted to do his best. So he had to stay and find a good topic to talk about. Fast. Silence became so awkward so suddenly. He had to figure out what to do. But what could he talk about with someone he barely knew?

Luckily for him, Finn's brain seemed to work a lot better than his that evening. Once Rachel was out of earshot, he leaned closer to Blaine. Blaine gulped nervously. So here it was. Finn was about to tell him what an idiot he was, that he hated him and he would keep an eye on him, that he would beat him up if something happened to Kurt or the baby or...

"To be honest, I hate that name" Finn whispered.

Wait a second. Was Finn talking to him like a friend? About baby names? He didn't want to threaten him or something?

"Excuse me?" Blaine said carefully. Could it really be so simple?

"I hate Barbra" Finn said. "I hope we'll have a son once we get there because I can't stand that name."

"Why don't you tell Rachel?" Blaine asked.

Finn threw back his head and laughed.

"I learned something really fast when I started dating Rachel all those years ago" he said. "She always gets what she wants. Fighting with her is not worth it. Giving in is much simpler."

"You mean living in a lie?" Blaine couldn't believe his ears.

"Sometimes it's better than getting into pointless fights" Finn said. "You'll learn that, too."

"If we get there" Blaine said, mostly to himself.

"Of course you will" Finn said with a big smile on his face and squeezed Blaine's shoulder. "Kurt can't shut up about you. I think he's really in love with you. It never happened before."

"You mean he was never…" Blaine hoped he didn't have to explain it.

"Oh. No. I didn't mean like that" Finn said. "You didn't talk about this?"

"We were too busy. With the baby and stuff" Blaine explained.

"Stuff" Finn repeated.

"Good stuff" Blaine said quickly.

"I get it, dude" Finn smile.

"So are we okay?" Blaine asked suddenly. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. His stupid mouth were always faster than his mind.

"Why wouldn't we be?" Finn asked in confusion.

"You seemed so angry with me at Sebastian's birthday party" Blaine said.

"Oh, that" Finn waved easily. "That was a lifetime ago."

"I was so stupid" Blaine shook his head.

"Yes, you were. But you know that and I don't think you'll do something like that again" Finn said.

"Never" Blaine said honestly. It seemed like a horrible nightmare. He couldn't believe he had hurt Kurt. He was so not like that.

"Is everything fine?" Kurt asked when he and Rachel walked back to the table.

"Sure" Finn said. "Blaine thought that I was still angry for what he did at Sebastian's party."

"Did you seriously have to tell everyone?" Blaine asked. It was so embarrassing. He had hoped that Finn would keep his mouth shut.

"As I said, you have nothing to worry about" Finn said easily. "I mean, it's not me you should be scared of."

"What does it mean?" Blaine asked.

"Burt's coming to the city to visit you" Finn said happily. "And he isn't too impressed."

Kurt raised his glass to his lips just when Finn answered Blaine's question. And when the answer left Finn's lips, Kurt almost choked on his water.

"Are you alright?" Blaine asked in concern.

"Dad?" Kurt asked between coughs, ignoring Blaine. "Is dad coming here?"

Dad… Burt… Burt Hummel. Father of Kurt Hummel. Coming to the city. Blaine finally processed the information.

"Oh, shit" he whispered.

"Yeah, you're in trouble" Finn seemed to enjoy the others' faces way too much. "He thinks that it's time to have a talk with both of you since Kurt seems to ignore him lately. He's worried about his family."

"Oh, shit" Blaine said again.

"It surely won't be that bad" Kurt said, trying to calm his own nerves just as much as Blaine's. He loved his father and he knew that his father loved him just as much, but he had a bad feeling about this visit. Maybe because he had avoided his father in the past… several weeks. Or because he had missed telling him some very important details of his life, like how his baby was doing or the fact that he was together with Blaine. Or that they had been living together way before they got back together.

"Really?" Blaine asked, not too convinced.

"It has to be" Kurt said, near to panic. He should have known that it would happen. It was a miracle that his dad had stayed away for so long. And now they had to face him and whatever he would tell them. There was no way out of this.

"Cheers" Finn said, seemingly unaware of the panic he caused. For him, it was just a simple family visit. For Kurt and Blaine… Well, they would figure out soon enough.

 **I know, I know, they need a break. But we also need Burt Hummel, right?**


	26. Chapter 26

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I see you're excited about Burt's visit. Well, here it is! :)**

Kurt was nervous. Probably not as nervous as Blaine but he was very close. Blaine started to worry about him. Kurt loved cleaning up in their apartment but what he had been doing in the previous days was insane. He went through their place several times, packed away things, washed down everything, vacuum the whole place, not just once, much to Blaine's worry. It was usually Blaine's job since he didn't want Kurt to lift anything heavy and he knew very well that moving was hard enough alone for his boyfriend with the extra weight of the baby and the constant kicking of their daughter. He didn't want Kurt to do anything stupid but it was hard to keep his eyes on him all the time. Kurt often worked from home when he was too tired to move, his boss allowed him to do his work and send it to her, so Kurt could get all the rest he needed. Unfortunately, Kurt didn't use that time he won to get some rest. No, he was constantly cleaning. And Blaine knew exactly why he was acting like he was crazy.

"When will your father arrive?" Blaine asked as he grabbed the mop and stepped away from Kurt, so he couldn't get it out of his hand.

"Tomorrow" Kurt sighed.

"So he likes cleanness" Blaine nodded. "Why don't you sit down a bit and let me finish this?"

"I want to do it" Kurt said.

"And I want you to be careful" Blaine said seriously. "Sit down."

To be honest, cleaning up was a great way to get rid of stress and Blaine understood why Kurt needed it so much. He was just as nervous as his boyfriend if not more. It was Kurt's father after all. Although Kurt told him a lot about the man, he still seemed scary. Blaine was worried about how the meeting would go and he had a good reason to be. Their situation was… well, quite unusual. Now that he was going to have a child on his own, he could imagine how Burt Hummel must have felt about their relationship. He knew what he would be like in the same situation. So yes, he was scared as hell. He couldn't let Kurt see it, though. He had to take care of Kurt and make sure he didn't do anything stupid.

"I'll stay home tomorrow, so you won't be left alone with him for a second" Blaine reassured his boyfriend.

"Are you sure?" Kurt asked.

"Of course" Blaine said, trying to smile. He wasn't looking forward to this meeting but he had to go through it. His first parent meeting. Wow, his relationship with Kurt was really getting serious. He had never reached this point before.

"Don't you think we should rearrange the furniture here?" Kurt asked suddenly.

Blaine stopped and looked at Kurt, trying to hide what he thought about Kurt's weird ideas. He couldn't tell if it was the worry about his dad or simply the pregnancy hormones, but he had to stop Kurt before he came up with another stupid idea.

"I think the living room looks perfect. We don't have to change anything" Blaine said. He decided not to point out that they had changed almost everything in here about two weeks earlier, when Kurt had realized that they had had no place for the playpen.

"But…"

"Have you thought about baby names?" Blaine asked, hoping that the new topic would help Kurt stop thinking about the next day.

"This isn't the right time to think about names, Blaine" Kurt said.

"I think it's as good as any other" Blaine said. "So what about Mary?"

Kurt snorted. Blaine knew that Kurt hated that name and he would never give their daughter, but it was enough to make him forget about his father for a little while.

"Never" Kurt said.

"But I think it's a beautiful name" Blaine said. "It's so simple and…"

"I don't like old-fashioned names" Kurt interrupted, determined not to let Blaine convince him. It was about their daughter. She had to live with this name for a very long time, they had to make the right choice. "You're right, I want something simple, too, but not that."

"It's so hard" Blaine sighed. He was glad that Kurt was able to forget about his father for a while.

"What should I cook tomorrow?" Kurt asked suddenly.

Blaine groaned. No matter what he did, Kurt wouldn't stop thinking about the next day. Maybe he should just let him do that… and stay close him in case Kurt came up with another crazy idea like painting the walls or doing grocery shopping on his own. The last thing he needed was bringing Kurt to the hospital because he hurt himself. It was just a day or two. Kurt's dad would come over, talk to them, maybe stay for the night and go home the next day. They would survive. It wasn't a big deal, right? But why was he so scared then?

~ o ~

Blaine was tired when he woke up the next day. He barely had any sleep that night, not only because of his own worries but also because Kurt couldn't sleep either. He had nightmares, something that had never happened before, and woke up several times, crying. Blaine was really worried that something wasn't right with him. Was he so scared of his own father? That didn't make any sense. As much as Blaine knew about Burt Hummel, he was a loving father, someone who always supported his son. Kurt shouldn't be so scared. He was an adult man in an adult relationship with another man who loved him and their baby. It didn't matter what Burt would say, it wouldn't change anything. They shouldn't be worried at all. Okay, it surely wouldn't be a nice conversation but they would get over it, together. Kurt had nothing to be afraid of, Blaine was here and he wouldn't let anything happen to him.

"Are you alright?" Blaine asked as he grabbed his clothes from the wardrobe. It was still to early but he needed a real coffee and he knew that Kurt needed his own decaffeinated one as well.

"I didn't sleep too much" Kurt admitted.

"I know" Blaine nodded. "Are you worried of your father?"

"No" Kurt smiled. "It's not that. I know that dad is disappointed in me but I'm not scared of him."

"Then what's wrong?" Blaine asked.

"I don't know" Kurt said uncertainly. "Something just doesn't feel right."

"Is there something wrong with the baby?" Blaine asked in concern.

"I don't think so" Kurt replied.

"We should call Sebastian" Blaine said.

"Blaine, there's nothing wrong with the baby" Kurt said. "Don' worry. I think it's just stress. I should sleep more."

"You had nightmares last night" Blaine said. "Not just once. I woke up several times to your cries. Are you sure you don't need a doctor?"

"Blaine, I'm fine" Kurt smiled. "I guess I worry too much about the baby. Now that we're getting close to the end of the pregnancy, I'm getting scared."

"Because of the C-section?" Blaine asked. They had already talked about it with Sebastian. That was the only way for Kurt to deliver the baby but Sebastian had ensured them that nothing would go wrong. He knew what he was doing.

"It's a huge thing" Kurt said.

"I'll be there with you" Blaine reassured him. "I won't let anything happen to you or our daughter."

Kurt smiled at him. He knew that he could trust Blaine, that he would be there with him and make sure they were safe. He was still scared. Giving birth to the baby was probably the scariest thing that had ever happened to him. He had no idea how he would go through it. It would be hard and painful but he tried not to think about the possibility that something might go wrong.

"We should find a name for her. I hate calling her the baby" Blaine said. "Maybe we should ask your father what he thinks. He might give us a good idea."

"And he might forgive us for ignoring him for so long" Kurt nodded. "That's a good idea."

"See? We have nothing to worry about" Blaine laughed. He walked to Kurt and gave him a quick kiss to his lips. "I should go. Your father will arrive soon."

"Could you get me a muffin to my coffee?" Kurt asked.

"No cheesecake this time?" Blaine smiled.

"No. I want a muffin" Kurt said.

"Everything for you" Blaine said and kissed Kurt one more time.

"You know, I think we still have time for some relaxing activity in the bedroom…"

"Before or after the coffee?" Blaine asked.

"Right now" Kurt smiled.

Coffee completely forgotten, Blaine pulled Kurt into his arms and hurried with him back to their bedroom.

~ o ~

Burt Hummel didn't like waiting, that was sure. Blaine only arrived to the front door a minute after the knock but it was enough to find a bald, middle-aged man in a not too good mood on their footstep. Blaine's first thought was that this man couldn't have any possible relation to his boyfriend. The man standing in front of him was tall, bulky, he was dressed in jeans and a flannel shirt. No, there was no way that this man was Kurt's father.

"Dad!"

The man watching Blaine as if he was ready to kill him turned to look at Kurt wh appeared behind Blaine and his features softened immediately.

"Hey, buddy" Burt said and pushed Blaine out of the way to hug his son. "You're huge!"

"Thanks, Dad" Kurt rolled his eyes. "You know, it's natural when you're in your last trimester with your baby."

"Is she kicking?" Burt asked and put his hand on Kurt's stomach. "Oh, I love this. I remember when your mother was pregnant with you. She complained all the time, that she was fat, that she couldn't move fast enough, but you know what? She was absolutely stunning. So peaceful and beautiful."

Burt, that huge man who was surely able to kill someone with his bare hands – or so Blaine thought – sighed and actually looked like he would burst into tears in any second. Blaine watched him in disbelief. He had wondered what Burt Hummel would be like, especially after hearing him and Kurt talk so many times, but this was the last thing he expected. Kurt's mother must have been a delicate woman because one thing was sure, he looked nothing like his father.

"Yes, she was a beautiful woman" Burt turned to look at Blaine with something unreadable in his eyes.

Blaine gulped nervously. He had stayed back at the door to watch the other two and he had thought that Burt couldn't read his mind, but it looked like he was very wrong about the man. Damn, how much did he know about him? Was it really possible that he read his thoughts and now he knew everything about him? He was so dead.

"You're mumbling, Blaine. We can both hear you" Kurt explained.

Okay, that was awkward.

"To answer your question, Kurt looks like his mother. Or more like his grandmother, actually" Burt said.

Blaine could tell that he wasn't too impressed but then the words really hit him and Burt didn't matter anymore. He had never considered that their daughter would look like any of their parents but now that Burt mentioned it, Blaine realized that there was a possibility that the baby would look like his own mother. Or have his father's personality. God, that would be horrible. And there was another bad possibility, that their daughter would look like Burt! Blaine didn't need more than a second to imagine a huge child, bald child with broad shoulders and masculine features. He had always thought that their baby would be a beautiful girl. What if she wouldn't be?

"Blaine, are you still here?" Kurt asked, waving his hands in front of him.

Blaine forced himself not to think about what the baby would be like, he quickly reminded himself that he would love the baby, no matter what, and returned his attention to the two men standing in front of him. He was finally focused on the current situation. He had Kurt's father in his living room, a man who seemingly didn't really like him, and he had to make a good impression. Where exactly should he start? Oh, yes. That was it.

"It's nice to meet you, Mr Hummel" he smiled. "I'm Blaine Anderson. I'm… Well, I…"

"You're the guy who knocked up my boy" Burt helped him out.

"Dad!" Kurt gasped.

"What? It's true!" Burt said. "It's nice of you two that you finally decided to introduce him anyway."

Kurt sighed and rubbed his forehead. He should have seen it coming, although he had hoped that it would be a lot easier with his father.

"It was my fault, okay?" Kurt said. "I just… things have been kind of hectic around us. I didn't know what would be the best way to introduce him to you."

"A phone call would have been nice" Burt said. "I didn't think I would get to know that you are together from your brother. You should have told me."

Blaine watched Kurt in worry. He was so pale and Blaine was worried that he might start to cry. Kurt was so sensitive, Burt should have known that he didn't need this right now.

"I told him to wait" Blaine said. It was scary how Burt looked at him but Blaine held his gaze steadily. "We finally sorted things out and I thought it would be better to give ourselves time to just get to know each other again."

"I love my son. And I love my granddaughter" Burt said. He sighed and shook his head. "I feel like I'm completely left out of their lives now. It really hurts."

Blaine appreciated that Kurt's father was so honest with him. This way they could discuss everything. He believed Kurt, he truly trusted him and believed that his father was a good man and they could have a good relationship with him. They only had to get through this.

"I know. And I'm really sorry, Sir" Blaine said. "I know we should have handled things differently but it's too late to change the past. I still think that we can get over the misunderstandings. I know how much you mean to Kurt."

Blaine had no idea what he was hoping would happen. He expected Burt to accept his apology or at least change topic or anything like that. But the man seemed still hurt and Blaine didn't know what else to say. He apologized. He gave Burt a good excuse why they had ignored him for so long. It didn't seem to be enough, though. Damn, this guy must have been just as stubborn as his son.

"Uhm… Are you hungry?" Kurt asked, desperate to break the silence that settled in. "You must be tired. Why don't you sit down a but until we prepare lunch?"

Blaine was glad that Kurt found them a way out. Burt didn't seem like he wanted to talk right now, he only nodded and walked to the couch. Kurt quickly pressed the remote control into his hand and pushed Blaine out of the room.

"Your dad is scary" Blaine said immediately when the door was closed behind them and they were safe in the kitchen.

"He's just hurt. Give him some time" Kurt said.

"Do you think he hates me?" Blaine asked.

"I think he needs time to get to know you" Kurt answered.

That wasn't too reassuring. Blaine wondered how long Burt would stay with them. He secretly hoped that he would stay with Rachel and Finn for the night but he had a bad feeling that they weren't that lucky.

They prepared their meal in silence. Blaine used that time to think about what he should say. He wasn't really good in this. He often screwed up when he was nervous, he said things he shouldn't, stupid things he couldn't allow for himself right now. So he tried to come up with a few good topics, using the information he had about Burt Hummel. It was hard. He knew absolutely nothing about cars, he barely watched TV, so they didn't have too much in common.

They were almost done with lunch when Blaine noticed that something wasn't right with Kurt. He was sitting at the table and he was so pale again.

"What's wrong?" Blaine asked.

"I don't know" Kurt said.

"Kurt, we should talk to Sebastian..."

"I'm fine" Kurt said. "It's just… I think I'm nervous, that's all."

"I'm not surprised" Blaine snorted.

"We'll get through this" Kurt said. "Just stay calm and ignore his comments. You'll be fine."

Blaine brought the plates to the table and was ready to bring the food there as well when Kurt left him. He freaked out because Burt was already there, his eyes on Blaine the whole time. Where the hell was Kurt going? He quickly went after him and grabbed his hand.

"Where are you going?" Blaine asked.

"To the bathroom" Kurt explained.

"You can't leave me alone with him!"

"You'll be fine" Kurt said. He was afraid that his dad might hear them.

"Can I go with you?" Blaine asked desperately.

"Blaine, I have to pee" Kurt explained.

"We have no secrets..."

"Blaine!"

"Fine" Blaine sighed heavily. He had no other option. He had to back in there and face Burt.

Blaine approached the man slowly and carefully. He didn't risk anything. Although he was pretty sure that Burt wouldn't kill him in those few minutes they spent alone without Kurt, it was better to be careful.

He took a seat on the other side of the table, needing to be as far away from Burt as possible. He kept his eyes on the table for a while, trying to figure out what to say. He had to talk to the man. He had to find a good topic to show Burt that he really wanted to get to know him.

"Uhm… so you like cars" he said the first thing that came into his mind.

Burt didn't answer but the look he gave him was enough to know that he wasn't sure if Blaine was sane. It only made Blaine desperate and when he was desperate, he said stupid things.

"I never wanted one" he said. "They are too expensive for me. And they stink."

Burt didn't even blink as he watched him.

"I-I mean, it's not like I don't have enough money to support Kurt…"

Wrong choice of words.

"I don't really mean support him" he said quickly. "We're in this together, so of course we share everything. And I'll help him raise the baby, even when we break… IF we break up."

He wanted to die.

"You aren't too impressed, right?" Blaine asked in panic.

"No, I'm not" Burt answered honestly.

Blaine hoped that Kurt would find the solution because he honestly didn't know what else to do. He should probably just shut up and let his boyfriend handle this before he did things worse if it was possible. Knowing how stupid he could be, it was absolutely possible.


	27. Chapter 27

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

When Blaine woke up, he felt like he had had no sleep at all that night. Although they had gone to bed early, Kurt had been so exhausted that he had passed out way earlier than his usual bedtime, he couldn't sleep too well, knowing that Kurt's father was right in the room next to theirs. Kurt also didn't sleep well, he was moaning again and it seemed like he was in pain. Or he was just having a nightmare, Blaine didn't know, but it was enough for him to be fully awake, even if he was tired as hell. He gently shook Kurt's shoulder and watched in worry as Kurt opened his eyes.

"What time is it?" Kurt asked, rubbing his tired eyes.

"Way too early" Blaine smiled. "Are you alright? You seemed to be in pain."

"I guess it was just a nightmare" Kurt said.

"Do you want to sleep some more?" Blaine asked.

"No, I'm fine" Kurt answered. He pushed himself up and looked around, searching for his clothes. "God, I need a coffee."

"Just give me five minutes to get ready" Blaine said. He yawned and gave himself a minute more to gather some energy for the day. He had a bad feeling that he wouldn't get too much rest with Kurt's father being there. "I guess I should get something for your father, too?"

"A good coffee wouldn't hurt" Kurt smiled.

"Okay" Blaine nodded.

He went every day to their favorite coffee shop to buy Kurt and himself their coffees and also because Kurt loved having something sweet for breakfast. He didn't know what to get for Burt, though. He decided to take a quick shower before leaving, so he had some time to clear his mind and think about what they should do that day. He considered staying home but it seemed like a bad idea. Burt clearly didn't like him, he had to figure out how to show the man that he wasn't a bad guy and Kurt would be happy with him. He got dressed and walked down to the coffee shop. He bought their coffees and some muffins, so they didn't have to worry about breakfast. Once he took a sip of his coffee, he got a wonderful idea of how to spend the day. The weather was beautiful, perfect for a walk, and he knew from Kurt that Burt loved sightseeing and he never got bored of the city. Blaine knew New York like the back of his hand, he would be the perfect guide, he could show Burt his favorite places and tell him stories of the city. Oh, yes, that was perfect. They would avoid awkward conversations and have a great time together. Burt would surely love him a lot more once he saw that side of Blaine.

"Good morning" Blaine said happily as he walked into the apartment where Burt and Kurt were already sitting in the living room, chatting. Blaine placed the paper cups in front of them and walked into the kitchen to grab the plates. When he walked back to the others, he felt a lot more relaxed around Burt than the day before. One plan was enough to make him more confident.

"You seem happy" Kurt smiled.

"I have a wonderful idea" Blaine said. "We have wonderful weather today and I thought we could spend the day outside."

"What do you mean?" Kurt asked.

Blaine looked at Burt briefly. The man seemed to be interested. Good.

"Sightseeing" Blaine said shortly. "There are so many things your dad should see. He's our guest, I'm pretty sure he wants to spend some time outside."

Blaine looked at Burt again who only nodded in agreement.

"What a wonderful idea!" Kurt said. "And then we could have lunch in that Italian restaurant."

"Of course" Blaine nodded.

"It's decided then" Burt said.

Blaine watched the man in surprise as he stood up. Wait… Did Burt expect them to leave immediately? But Blaine didn't even know where to take him!

"Give me ten minutes to finish this" Kurt said and pointed at his muffin.

Burt sat back down and got another muffin for himself. Blaine only drank the rest of his coffee, too lost in his thoughts. He had to plan everything perfectly. He couldn't screw up this time.

"Is that coffee you're drinking?" Burt frowned when he finally noticed the paper cup in front of his son.

"It's decaffeinated" Kurt rolled his eyes. "I'm not stupid, dad."

"There weren't such things when your mother was pregnant with you" Burt muttered.

"Well, that wasn't exactly yesterday" Kurt replied.

"True" Burt nodded. "I still loved those times. Everything was so much simpler."

Blaine decided that he didn't want to know what Burt meant with that.

~ o ~

By the time they got home that evening, Blaine felt more exhausted than ever. He was surprised that Kurt was still able to stand on his feet after such a long and exhausting day. They visited a lot of places, it seemed like they went through the entire Manhattan in one day and Burt still didn't seem to have enough of the city. It was definitely harder to keep him entertained than Blaine had thought. He planned to take Kurt and his father to another restaurant near their home to have dinner but Kurt told him that he was too tired to walk any more. So they went home, deciding to order a pizza or something, so Kurt could rest.

Even if Blaine was pretty sure that he and Burt would never become friends, Burt was a good father, just like Kurt had told him. They talked a lot about the baby, Burt asked them about the smallest details of the pregnancy and everything baby-related. He was also worried about his son, almost as worried as Blaine himself. Burt always saw when something wasn't right with Kurt, just like that evening when Kurt seemed to be in pain again, that was why they returned home in the end, when Kurt finally admitted that moving so much might have been a little too much for him and he really wanted to lie down a bit.

Burt also asked Blaine about his family, something Blaine didn't really like talking about. His family was nothing like Kurt's and he was pretty sure that his parents would never come to visit them like Burt, not even if they found out that Blaine had a daughter. It wasn't like he wanted to tell them anyway. They would just make everything more complicated and Blaine didn't need that at all. Having Kurt's father around was more than enough. He wasn't sure if Kurt could handle his parents, they were a lot worse than Burt, even if the man was so terrifying sometimes. At least he didn't hate them. Okay, he didn't hate Kurt. Blaine wasn't sure what Burt thought about him.

"What would you like for dinner?" Blaine asked as he grabbed his phone.

"I'm not really hungry" Kurt told him.

"You have to eat" Blaine said.

"He's right" Burt said in agreement. "You have to take care of yourself and the baby."

"I think I'll just lie down a but" Kurt said. "I'm not feeling well."

"What's wrong?" Blaine and Burt asked in unison.

"I'm just tired, that's all" Kurt said.

"That sightseeing today wasn't a good idea" Burt shook his head.

"I thought you enjoyed it!" Blaine said.

"It was too much for my son. I thought you knew that he needed more rest" Burt said.

Blaine couldn't believe Burt was blaming him. He just wanted to make Burt like him!

"It wasn't me who wanted to see the whole city in one day" Blaine said befor ehe could stop himself.

"Could you two just stop?" Kurt asked in annoyance. "God, you're like two- ouch."

"What's wrong?" Blaine and Burt asked again.

"Just a cramp" Kurt said easily.

"Cramp?" Blaine asked with wide eyes.

"Yeah. They just come and go. Don't worry, it'll be over soon" Kurt said.

"Kurt, it's not normal" Burt said in worry.

"No, it isn't" Blaine agreed. "How often do you feel them?"

"I don't know. Every half an hour or so" Kurt said uncertainly.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Blaine asked in panic.

"Blaine, it's okay" Kurt said. "I just have to rest a little. It's fine."

"You had them yesterday, too" Blaine said, remembering how not okay Kurt had looked the previous day.

"Just a few of them" Kurt admitted.

"What?" Burt gasped. "Why didn't you tell us?"

"I thought that they would go away!" Kurt explained. "I don't think it's something we have to worry about. It must be because of the stress. I was so worried about what you would think about Blaine and then I saw that you didn't really like him. I thought that spending a day together would help you get to know each other."

"I can't believe you didn't tell us about this" Burt shook his head.

"It doesn't matter" Blaine said. "We have to go to the hospital, immediately."

"No!" Kurt said quickly. He imagined leaving these two alone and he freaked out. He had to be here in case something went wrong. It really wasn't a big deal, he was pretty sure that having some sleep would make the pain go away.

"Something might be wrong with the baby" Burt said.

Kurt had to admit that his father was right. Maybe it was really nothing but if something happened to the baby, he would blame himself forever.

"Okay" he said quietly. "Blaine, could you please call Sebastian?"

Blaine was already dialing the man's number before Kurt could finish the sentence.

~ o ~

Kurt wanted to yell at the others as they waited for Sebastian to arrive. He was already nervous, Blaine came up with every horrible scenario he could think of and Kurt started to believe that something was really wrong with the baby. On the top of that, these two didn't seem to leave each other alone for a second. His dad reminded Blaine way too often that he should calm down because the stress wasn't good for Kurt and Blaine didn't miss a chance to tell the older man that it was his responsibility to take care of his family. It was frustrating listening to them and Kurt wanted nothing but a few minutes on his own.

"Hey, guys" Sebastian said when he finally arrived. "What happened?"

"Kurt's in pain" Blaine said shortly.

Sebastian looked at Kurt for explanation.

"I've been feeling cramps since yesterday" Kurt explained. "They come and go but there's no regularity in them. It was better at night but it started again today."

"How often do you feel them?" Sebastian asked.

"It was about twice an hour at first but now I feel them more often" Kurt said and winced as he felt the pain in his abdomen again.

"Oh, I see" Sebastian nodded. "How bad is it?"

"Are you seriously asking you this when you can see that he's in pain?" Burt asked.

Sebastian turned to look at the man and smiled when he noticed who it was.

"Hello, Mr Hummel. It's nice to see you" he said.

"You too, kid" Burt said quickly. "So how bad is it?"

"It could be worse" Kurt said.

"But you're in pain!" Blaine said.

"Yes, but I'm still not screaming, am I?" Kurt asked back.

"Okay, let's make an ultrasound and see what's going on here" Sebastian said.

Kurt stood up and the others joined them in a second. They both wanted to help him and Kurt was afraid that they might end up in a fight again. He was too frustrated to deal with their stupid behavior again, so he stopped for a second to talk to them.

"I think you should stay out here" he said.

"What?" Blaine asked. "No! I have to be there with you!"

"I'm not leaving you alone" Burt said just as determinedly.

Apparently, Kurt wasn't in the mood to deal with them right now.

"You'll stay here" Kurt said. "I'm worried enough without having to deal with your stupid fights. I want you to let Sebastian work and find out what's happening, so no, you can't come in there with me. Stay here. And don't do anything stupid."

Before any of them could say anything, Kurt disappeared in the room. Sebastian looked at the two men for a moment and shrugged. It was better to do as they were told. Kurt could be really scary when he was angry.

Burt and Blaine were left on the corridor with nothing to do. The first two minutes were spent in stunned silence since none of them wanted to believe that they weren't allowed to go in there with Kurt.

"That's because you scared him by telling him that something might be wrong with the baby" Burt said.

"Oh, shut up. You didn't make it easier for him either" Blaine said, losing his temper.

Burt watched him in silence for a while. Blaine knew he overstepped but he so didn't care. He was worried about his family, it didn't matter what Burt Hummel thought about him right now.

"You might be right" Burt admitted.

Maybe that was what they needed to get along. Burt seemed to appreciate honesty a lot more than being nice all the time.

~ o ~

"What are the cramps like?" Sebastian asked as he leaned over Kurt and pressed his hands to his stomach.

"Bad" Kurt groaned. He already hated them. He was tired as hell but even lying on the bed hurt.

"A little more exactly, please" Sebastian replied.

Kurt sighed and put a gentle hand on his baby bump. The warmth of his hand made the pain lessen a bit.

"It's really uncomfortable. I have to shut my eyes and focus on breathing when it's the worst. Then it becomes less unbearable" he said.

"So you don't want to scream in pain?" Sebastian asked.

"Can it be so bad?" Kurt asked back.

"Definitely" Sebastian nodded.

"Ouch" Kurt said when the next cramp came. He sat up quickly because that position made it a little better and took deep breaths as he waited for the pain to go away.

"Can you feel it in your back, too?" Sebastian asked.

Kurt shook his head. He didn't know if it was good or bad but it was only his abdomen that was in pain.

"That's good, actually" Sebastian said. "Let's check it with the ultrasound."

Kurt wasn't sure if he agreed with Sebastian but lay back down once the pain lessened a bit. He held his hands on his stomach as he waited for Sebastian. It felt quite good. Maybe if he kept his hands there, it would solve the problem.

"Here you are, sweetie" Sebastian said when the baby came into view.

"Is she alright?" Kurt asked, raising his head to see his baby.

Sebastian remained silent for a while, only moving the probe on Kurt's baby bump, slowly and carefully. The could ultrasound gel brought back the pain, so Kurt pressed his eyes shut and tried to stay still.

"Do you still work so much?" Sebastian asked after a while.

"You know me" Kurt answered. "I want to finish all of my projects before the baby's birth. We discussed it with Blaine and I'll stay home for a few months before going back. Isabelle promised me that I would be able to work from home if it's necessary."

"I hope you don't work out too much" Sebastian said next.

"Of course not" Kurt snorted. "I'm always so tired, I'm happy I'm still able to walk to work."

"Do you walk a lot?" was the next question.

"An hour or two every day" Kurt said quickly. "Why are you asking me these questions?"

He was a little harsh but he didn't understand what Sebastian wanted with this. He was worried about his baby, he didn't want to discuss the details of his everyday routine. Besides, Sebastian had never asked him about it, so why was it so important now?

"Because I'm trying to figure out what has caused the cramps" Sebastian explained, smirking. "What were you thinking?"

"I don't know" Kurt sighed. "So what do you say?"

"I say that the baby is perfectly fine, but you have to take back a little if you don't want to give birth too early" Sebastian said.

"What?" Kurt asked in confusion.

"These are the signs that you're working too hard, again" Sebastian explained. "Do you remember when you passed out after sleeping nothing for two whole days?"

"I had too much work to do" Kurt muttered.

"That's my problem, too" Sebastian said. "You can't work so hard anymore. I know you, you barely sit down or eat when you're at work. Not to mention that you don't drink enough. You can't do that now. You have to slow down a bit."

"Do I really have to?" Kurt asked. He imagined working until the last day, going to work till the very last moment as if nothing happened. Because he was Kurt Hummel and he was never sick or tired.

"If you want a healthy baby, yes" Sebastian nodded.

So Kurt didn't have a choice. The baby's health was the most important.

"You should stay home for a few days and rest" Sebastian suggested. "I'll give you something for the cramps. It's normal if you sometimes feel them but it shouldn't get too uncomfortable. If it doesn't help, I want you to come back."

"Fine" Kurt sighed.

"Staying home doesn't mean painting the walls or something equally stupid" Sebastian said pointedly.

"Do I look so stupid?" Kurt asked.

"Should I answer this question?" Sebastian asked back.

Kurt sighed and shook his head. It was insane. Sebastian should have known that he wouldn't risk his baby's safety. Even if it meant staying in bed for days. Oh, God, how would he be able to deal with it?

"I guess your father will be happy to stay with you for a few more days to help you" Sebastian smiled. "As I see he already loves Blaine. It'll be an interesting visit."

"It already is" Kurt sighed. And couldn't wait for its end.


	28. Chapter 28

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I know it's been a while since I last updated any of my stories. The reason is that I've been really sick lately. I'm getting better, but it's a long progress. I'm still weak and in a lot of pain.**

 **I don't want to let you wait too long again, though, and I have these chapters to my stories already written and ready to be shared, so I thought this time would be as good as any other to upload them. It also gives me a reason to get up and do something else than watching TV shows. It's getting so boring.**

 **I hope you like this chapter.**

Staying in bed for the biggest part of the day was boring. Kurt felt like time stopped and the day of his daughter's birth was light-years away. He wasn't sure if he would be able to stay sane until it was safe to move again. He wanted to work, he wanted to get up and walk, maybe work out a little, nothing exhausting, of course, just some light exercises. Something that made time pass faster.

Unfortunately, Blaine and his father made sure he had nothing to do. One of them was always around in case Kurt needed something and brought him everything he needed, to make sure the baby was fine. It frustrated Kurt, a lot. He wasn't used to doing nothing, especially not so long, and he just wanted to get over the pregnancy.

Having his father around, although it was nice, caused them a lot of trouble. He had no idea what was wrong with Burt and Blaine but Kurt could tell that there was something the men didn't tell him. He could feel how tense they were when they had to be in the same room and Kurt wanted nothing but to figure out how to end it. He wanted them to get along well, they were the two most important people in his life after all. But his current condition didn't help at all. He couldn't be there with them all the time and he had no clue what to say or do. He had tried to talk to them so many times but it never helped. Both Burt and Blaine told him that they were fine, that Kurt had nothing to worry about. It didn't look like they wanted to change anything.

Kurt sighed and looked down at the bowl full of popcorn on his baby bump. It wasn't like he was hungry but he figured out that the baby hated it when something was on Kurt's stomach and she started kicking the second something touched Kurt's sensitive part. Kurt found it funny, it was one way to spend time between turning from one side to the other. Maybe it was crazy but it entertained him. He watched the bowl move, the small pieces of popcorn fly every time the baby kicked it, and giggled.

"I see you're having a great time."

Kurt grabbed the bowl and took it off of his stomach as Blaine stepped to the bed. Damn, he was caught.

"I'm bored" Kurt told his boyfriend. "I figured out that she hates having things on my stomach and she kicks every time when she feels something touching it."

"Isn't it dangerous?" Blaine asked in worry.

"It weights almost nothing" Kurt shrugged. "I don't think it bothers her too much. She only doesn't like it when we disturb her in her sleep."

"I already love her" Blaine smiled.

"Me too" Kurt said in agreement. "She's an amazing kid."

"Of course she is. She's our child after all" Blaine winked.

Kurt smiled. It was good to see that Blaine was in a good mood.

"I guess you've had a good day" he said.

"Just the usual" Blaine shrugged. "We're done with the shootings for the magazine, I only have some corrections to do. And I can do them from home."

"Does it mean that you're staying home?" Kurt asked, not knowing if it was good or bad. He was happy that Blaine was home but he was worried how he and his father would cooperate.

"For a few days, yes" Blaine nodded and reached for Kurt's hand. "I thought you would be happy."

"Because I am" Kurt said. He hesitated for a second but then decided to continue. It seemed like the perfect time to talk to Blaine about his worries. "It also means that you can focus on some toher things."

"What do you mean?" Blaine asked.

Kurt took a deep breath. He knew that Blaine hated it when he told him what to do but Kurt wanted everything sorted out by the time their child arrived. And that meant having a happy boyfriend.

"First of all, you haven't called Jeff yet" Kurt said.

"Oh, no, not again" Blaine said, closing his eyes. Kurt kept reminding him that he should talk to his friend but Blaine was still so angry with him.

"You have to get over that fight. It happened weeks ago" Kurt said. "I know that you miss your friends and I don't want you to lose them. Please, just talk to him. I believe that you can discuss everything."

"It's not so easy" Blaine muttered.

"Yes, it is" Kurt said. "Should I call him for you?"

"No" Blaine said quickly. "I-I'll do it. Soon."

"You better call him soon or else I'll call Wes and get Jeff's number" Kurt said.

"Fine" Blaine sighed. He knew Kurt. And he also knew that his boyfriend would talk to Jeff himself if he had to. It seemed like his relationship with his friends was important to Kurt and he wouldn't let Blaine forget about them for a second.

"Very good" Kurt nodded. "How are you and dad doing?"

"Fine" Blaine answered.

Kurt sighed. He had asked his father the same earlier that day and he had gotten the same answer. That meant that the men still weren't talking.

"What's wrong with you two?" Kurt asked.

"Nothing" Blaine said.

"I can tell that something isn't right with you two" Kurt said.

"Did he tell you anything?" Blaine asked.

"No" Kurt shook his head. "Only that I have nothing to worry about."

"See?" Blaine said with a fake smile on his face. "We're fine. Just stop worry about us."

"Blaine…"

"I think I should go back to the kitchen. I have to start cooking if we want to eat dinner" Blaine said and stood up. "Just stay in the bed, okay?"

"What else can I do?" Kurt muttered as Blaine walked out of the room. Something wasn't right here. And he would take care of it, whether Blaine and Burt wanted it or not.

~ o ~

Kurt decided to talk to his father next. Since Burt stayed a little longer than he had planned, saying that Kurt needed him when Blaine wasn't home, Kurt could use that time they spent together to interrogate his father. He kept his eyes on him and Blaine all the time but it still seemed that he had missed something important. He couldn't not see how distant his father was around Blaine and it just wasn't right. As Kurt knew, Burt was a kind man everybody loved. Something was wrong with these two… And Kurt had to deal with it.

"Do you want a cup of tea?" Burt asked as he walked back into the room. "Are you hungry? I could make something for lunch. I know I'm not the best cook but…"

"Dad, stop" Kurt said. "You don't have to help me all the time. I'm fine."

"You clearly need me" Burt said. "You remember what Sebastian said. The baby…"

"The baby is fine" Kurt interrupted. "Please, sit down. I want to talk to you."

Burt sighed and took a seat on Kurt's bed. Kurt watched him in silence for a while, trying to figure out what was his problem. Because something was seriously wrong here and he knew that it would be hard to get it out of his father.

"What do you want to talk about?" Burt asked.

"Blaine" Kurt said. "I can't not see that something is wrong with him. And you."

"What do you mean?" Burt asked. "We're perfectly fine."

"No, you aren't" Kurt sighed. "Look, I know you. I know that you don't accept my boyfriends too easily…"

"I never met one before" Burt pointed out.

"Well, nobody important" Kurt corrected him. "But Blaine is different. He's the one for me, dad, and it hurts so much that you don't get along well."

"I have no problem with Blaine" Burt said.

"Is it true?" Kurt asked with a raised eyebrow. "You're so distant with him. I haven't seen you relaxed since you arrived. Something isn't right here."

"Kurt, you worry too much" Burt said. "I like the kid. Really. Maybe we need more time to get to know each other. But I have no problem with Blaine."

"Why don't you talk to him then?" Kurt asked.

"We have nothing in common" Burt shrugged.

"You don't even know him" Kurt replied.

"What do you want with this?" Burt asked in frustration.

"I want you two feel comfortable around each other" Kurt said. "Please, dad, just give him a chance. Blaine's a good man. And he's trying so hard."

Burt didn't seem too convinced and it hurt so much. He should have trusted Kurt. Kurt knew Blaine after all, better than anyone else. His dad should accept his decision.

"It's already decided. Blaine and I are together and we're going to raise the baby together. You have no say in this" Kurt said, turning more serious. "I love him and I want you to give him a chance. He's the father of your grandson after all. He deserves it."

Burt muttered something Kurt couldn't understand. He sighed, shaking his head. Why couldn't his father understand how important Blaine was for him?

"Fine" Burt said a little louder in the end. "I'll talk to the kid."

"Thank you!" Kurt said happily. "Believe me, you won't regret it."

Burt sighed heavily. Kurt always got what he wanted because he couldn't say no to his only child. He only hoped that Kurt was right about Blaine and it was Burt who saw things wrong.

~ o ~

Blaine decided to take a short walk before going home. Although he had promised Kurt to talk to his father, he chose to avoid the man. Burt was so scary and Blaine always said stupid things when he was around. He didn't want to make things worse again, so he decided to clear his head before going home, so he had a chance to act naturally around the man.

He didn't even see where his feet led him until he was already there. He looked up at the building, remembering the last time he had been here. And how badly it had ended. Blaine sighed as he walked forward and opened the door. There was little chance that Jeff was here, so he would just have a coffee and leave. Just because he loved the place.

He stopped when his eyes landed on the familiar blonde's face, sitting alone at their usual table. Blaine considered turning around before it was too late but he knew that Jeff saw him, too. He was looking straight at Blaine after all. Jeff didn't look well. He was so pale and Blaine could tell that he hadn't had much sleep lately. Maybe Kurt was right and their fight bothered Jeff just as much as Blaine.

"Hey" Jeff said quietly.

"Hey" Blaine said, too. He still didn't move.

"Do you want to join me?" Jeff asked.

"Are you still angry with me?" Blaine asked back.

Jeff sighed and looked away. Blaine bit his lip before he could say something wrong again. He didn't want to fight anymore. He just wanted his friend back.

"I think we should talk" Blaine said and sat down to Jeff's table. He was here, Jeff was here, and he missed his friend so much, not to mention that Kurt didn't leave him alone because he wanted Blaine and Jeff to sort out things… The time was as right as any other.

Jeff avoided his gaze, choosing to stare at his glass instead. Jeff wasn't the type who talked about his feelings too easily. Neither was Blaine. They still had to grow up and talk like adults if they wanted to get over their fight.

"Look… I-I think I know why you told Kurt those things when you met" Blaine started, deciding to get straight to the topic. "We talked about it with Kurt and I guess it's all my fault."

Jeff snorted, shaking his head.

"So he told you that it's your fault?" he asked.

"No" Blaine said quickly. "Look, I know I said horrible things about him, but it was only because I was angry with him. I didn't give him a chance to explain why he lied to me. But then we had a mature conversation…"

"So he fooled you. Again" Jeff said.

"Would you please listen to me?" Blaine asked in frustration. "Kurt's not like that. He's a nice guy and I think you should give him a chance to get to know you better."

"I don't think I should" Jeff said. "To be honest, Blaine, I'm not sure this will work. He lied to you, he didn't tell you about the baby…"

"We both made mistakes" Blaine cut in. "I wasn't too nice to him either. I also sort of cheated on him. No wonder he didn't trust me."

"Cheated?" Jeff asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Sort of" Blaine said again because that brief misstep wasn't really cheating or at least he didn't think it was. He wasn't together with Kurt and it wasn't like he did anything serious. It was stupid but they were over it.

"I guess you're lucky he didn't castrate you" Jeff smirked.

Blaine threw back his head and laughed. Kurt had done insane things to get his attention again but it seemed so funny now.

"As I said, he's a good guy" Blaine said. "You should give him a chance. I love him, I really love him, and I'm so happy that we're going to have a baby together."

"I thought you were scared" Jeff said.

"I was" Blaine admitted. "Having a baby is a huge responsibility and I wasn't sure I was ready for that. But now I know that I am. I'm perfectly ready for my daughter's arrival."

"Wow. You've really changed" Jeff said.

"What can I say? It was time to grow up" Blaine shrugged. "Having Kurt and the baby is the best that ever happened to me. I always wanted a real family and now I have what I need. Kurt makes me so happy and I know it will be even better once the baby arrives."

Jeff watched him in silence for a while. Blaine wasn't sure if he understood what he wanted to say, Blaine wasn't really the type who talked easily after all, especially when he was nervous. So he felt relieved when Jeff smiled and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Congratulations, Blaine. You finally reached adulthood" he said.

"Thanks" Blaine rolled his eyes.

"So we should get ready for your wedding, I guess" Jeff smiled.

Blaine blinked in surprise. He knew that Jeff was just joking but maybe it wasn't a bad idea after all. He had asked Kurt to marry him at the beginning but never thought about it again, not even when they had gotten back together.

"Blaine, you know that I was just joking, right?" Jeff asked carefully, knowing how stupid his friend could be.

"Sure" Blaine said uncertainly.

"Don't make a rushed decision" Jeff said. "If Kurt is so important for you, you should take it slower. Do you remember when you…"

"I get it" Blaine said quickly. Okay, maybe he had made some strange decisions in the past but he was mature enough not to jump into anything too quickly. "Besides, I don't think Kurt would let me do anything stupid."

"I guess you were right about him" Jeff nodded slowly. "He brings out your better side. I like it."

"And you'll like him, too" Blaine said. "You should come over one day. Well, not right now, Kurt's father is here and he's…"

Blaine looked down and sighed.

"He's what?" Jeff asked.

"He's like a nightmare" Blaine admitted. "Kurt told me that he was the overprotective type but what he's doing is simply insane."

"What do you mean?" Jeff asked.

"I think he hates me" Blaine admitted.

"Oh, come on. He surely likes you" Jeff smiled. "Everybody likes you."

"I didn't make a good impression" Blaine muttered. "I was so nervous when he arrived and you know what I am like when I'm nervous."

"Ouch" Jeff said.

"Yeah. I know" Blaine nodded. "And now I have no idea what to do. I tried to be nice but he's so distant and it's really frustrating. I just want him to like me."

"Don't try so hard" Jeff said.

Blaine frowned. He had no idea what Jeff meant with that or how it would help him. Jeff sighed and decided to explain it to his friend.

"You want to impress him, I get it, but maybe that's not what he wants" Jeff said. "Try to act naturally. Try not to be too nervous. And talk to him."

"I already tried" Blaine said.

"Maybe you should try differently" Jeff said.

Blaine listened to his friend as Jeff explained it to him. As Jeff talked, Blaine came to the realization that it could actually work.

~ o ~

Blaine couldn't not be nervous when he got home later that evening but forced himself to act naturally. Jeff was right, it was his home and he shouldn't be scare din his own apartment because of his boyfriend's father. He was an adult man, he could handle it. He still bought his secret weapon and decided to use it against Burt Hummel later that night, when Kurt was asleep. He understood how important they were for Kurt and he would do everything in his power to solve the problem.

"Hey, Burt" Blaine said shortly as he stepped into the living room. He nodded towards the man but didn't stay behind to try to talk to him. He simply left and went to see Kurt.

Blaine stayed with Kurt for a long while, talking to him about Jeff. Kurt was so happy to hear that they were fine again that he forgot about his dad completely. Blaine decided not to talk about him either, at least until he talked to Burt himself. It didn't happen until later that night. Blaine only talked to Burt once, when he told him that dinner was ready, trying to be as cool as possible. He didn't talk too much. Just as necessary. Burt seemed surprised but didn't say anything.

When Kurt went to sleep and Blaine was sure that they wouldn't be disturbed, he walked back into the living room where Burt was sitting in silence, grabbed the beer from his bag and put it down in front of the man. Burt looked surprised but still didn't say anything.

"We need to talk" Blaine said seriously.

"We do" Burt nodded.

Blaine watched the man for a good while, trying not to freak out. Burt seemed still so scary. He had to remind himself a few times that he wasn't a child anymore, that they were in his home and he shouldn't feel uncomfortable because he did nothing wrong. He raised his head and took a deep breath. It looked like he was the one who had to start.

"I noticed that you don't really like me" Blaine said.

"You can say so" Burt said.

"Why?" Blaine asked, getting straight to the topic. "I don't think I gave you a reason to hate me either."

Burt but his lip like Kurt did every time when he was nervous. That was it, Blaine thought.

"You don't think I'm good enough for Kurt?" Blaine offered. "Because I can assure you, Kurt's happy with me. We love each other, we'll stay together and raise the baby together. Maybe I'm not the best he could have but I truly love him and I give him everything he need. I might not be as hot…"

"I don't care about your look or money. They don't matter" Burt said. "I only want to see him happy."

"And you don't think he's happy with me?" Blaine asked back.

"That's not what I meant" Burt muttered.

"Then tell me what's your problem with me" Blaine said, trying really hard not to shout. He just wanted to know the truth.

"My problem is that my son is going through something really important, probably the most important thing in his life and I'm left out of it completely" Burt said suddenly.

Blaine blinked in surprise. He was prepared for everything but not this.

"I-I don't understand" he said.

"My son is going to have a baby soon, my granddaughter, and I wanted to you to share this experience with me" Burt said. "Look, I don't want to bother you too much. You're adults, you have your own lives…"

"But you're the grandfather" Blaine muttered. It made sense. Of course it made sense. Burt was hurt because he barely knew anything about the baby who was also his family.

"A phone call someday would have been nice" Burt said. "Just to know that everything was fine. Or a sonogram photo. I haven't even seen the baby yet."

Blaine watched Burt in silence. Now that he knew what was the problem, he berated himself for leaving the older man out of everything. To be honest, he had forgotten about him. His own parents didn't care about him and they wouldn't care about his child either. But Burt was different.

"It's my fault."

They both turned to look at Kurt who was standing at the door of his and Blaine's bedroom.

"Kurt, you should be in bed…" Blaine started but Kurt silenced him with one look.

"You shouldn't blame him because he has nothing to do with this. I screwed up" Kurt said as he took a seat beside Blaine and grabbed his hand. "If you want to blame somebody, it should be me."

"Kurt, you shouldn't anger yourself. Stress isn't good…"

"I can handle it, Blaine" Kurt said as he glanced at Blaine but almost immediately turned back to his father. "It was me who forgot to call you. I could say that my life was complicated, it's true but it's not a good explanation. I was selfish. I only cared about myself and forgot how it made you feel. I'm sorry, dad."

"You should have called me" Burt muttered.

"I know and I'm sorry. I know it doesn't change anything but I hope it's not too late" Kurt said with a heavy sigh. "I love you and I love Blaine, too, and it's so bad to see you not getting along."

"It's fine, Kurt…" Blaine started but was interrupted again, this time by Burt.

"You really love him, right?" Burt asked.

"Yes, I do" Kurt nodded. "I never felt like this before. Blaine's the right one for me."

Blaine smiled like an idiot as he watched Kurt. Kurt who loved him. Okay, he already knew that Kurt loved him but this time his words seemed so much stronger. Blaine could practically feel the love behind them.

"I guess I should get used to Blaine then" Burt said.

"You certainly should because he's not going anywhere" Kurt said determinedly.

To Blaine's surprise, Burt smiled.

"I can't believe you grew up so quickly" Burt said, shaking his head.

"I'm 30, dad" Kurt pointed out.

"You'll always be my little boy who danced around the house in his mother's high heels…"

"You did what?" Blaine smiled as he turned to Kurt.

"He's just joking. Don't listen to him" Kurt said quickly.

"Oh, but it's true" Burt said and leaned forward to whisper to Blaine. "He threw a huge tantrum at the age of three when he didn't get a tiara for Christmas."

"That must have been funny" Blaine smiled.

"Oh, it was. And there was that time when…"

Kurt should have felt embarrassed but he was too happy to see the others have a real conversation to care. He decided to leave these two for themselves, so they could talk freely and walked back into the bedroom. He left the door slightly open, so he could listen to their voices. It was great to hear them talk to each other so naturally. As Kurt closed his eyes, he knew that everything would be fine. At least between his boyfriend and his father, the most important people in his life.


	29. Chapter 29

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I know it's been a while. I posted the previous chapter a month ago. I thought back then that I would recover in no time but I was so wrong. It's finally over, though, and I'm happy to be back.**

 **I hope you like this chapter.**

Weeks passed way too quickly for Kurt's liking. He was glad that the pregnancy was almost over, sometimes he wished it was already over because it started to get really uncomfortable for him, but on the other hand, he started to panic. They had nothing ready for the arrival of the baby. Since he had to stay in bed for longer than expected, he didn't have the chance to get the baby supplies they needed. Blaine insisted to order everything online but it wasn't that easy. Kurt wanted to see some things himself, decide between the available colors and it wasn't something he could do online. It wasn't the same. Too bad Blaine didn't seem to understand his problem.

"Pink is pink, Kurt" he reasoned. "Believe me, the baby won't care if you get her a lighter color. The clothes are supposed to be comfortable, nothing more."

Of course Blaine didn't understand. Although he loved shopping for the baby, he wasn't so worried that they might not get the right color. Or that they wouldn't have enough baby clothes.

"We can always buy new onesies if we need more" he said.

It wasn't just about clothes. Kurt felt the need to make everything ready for the baby's arrival and that included cleaning the whole apartment, down to the last corner. And there was the nursery. The nursery had to be ready or else… Okay, Kurt couldn't come up with a good reason, he just felt that he had to get everything ready. As soon as possible.

"I'll clean up, okay? Just relax and try to rest. I'll take care of everything" Blaine said.

At least he was patient with Kurt, even when his boyfriend woke up in the middle of the night, panicked that he forgot something important again. It happened more and more often. Kurt couldn't believe they had so much to do. Or that they had been so lazy when they knew very well that they only had a few more weeks left. There was a chance that the baby would come sooner. What would they do then? And there was their biggest problem...

"Do you think we'll find the right name in time?"

That was something that concerned Blaine as much as it concerned Kurt. They had no idea how to name their baby. They had tried everything, really. They had gone through the girl names, they had made lists, they had talked about it so many times but they couldn't decide which one to choose. The biggest problem was that their taste was so different. Kurt wanted something extravagant, Blaine wanted something simple. On the top of that, there were too many possibilities and they got lost in them way too easily. So they went to bed every single night without making the decision.

"We have to give her a name" Blaine said calmly. "Why don't we try to make lists again?"

"We already did that. And it didn't work" Kurt replied.

"Maybe something will catch our attention this time" Blaine said.

So they made their lists and sat down to discuss the names again.

"Anna?"

"Too common. Valandra?"

"Kurt, she has to live with this name for her whole life."

"It's a beautiful name" Kurt glared at him.

"No" Blaine said. "Annette?"

"Too serious" Kurt said, shaking his head.

"Fine" Blaine sighed and went through his list. "Susan?"

"No" Kurt groaned. "Do you remember my coach from high school, Sue Sylvester? Thanks, but I don't need a reminder of her."

"Okay. Your turn" Blaine said. He didn't want to lose his head over baby names. They would find something. They just had to be patient.

"Phylicia."

"Seriously?" Blaine asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Okay, I have no idea why I have this name on my list" Kurt sighed.

"Do you think we'll find a name at all?" Blaine asked after a while. They had nothing and he started to get desperate.

"Well, we have to find one" Kurt shrugged.

"It's so hard" Blaine shook his head.

"I know. Why don't we give us some time to think and discuss the names tomorrow again?"

They did. And the next day. And the next day. They still had nothing. Absolutely nothing. Both of them started to get desperate. Naming their baby shouldn't have been so hard, there were so many possibilities, why couldn't they find a suitable name then?

That was how they got to the day of the baby shower. Kurt had been waiting for this day so excitedly but now that it was finally here, he was simply depressed. It meant that they only had a few weeks left, if they were lucky, and it didn't seem like they were any closer to the right name. He was afraid that they wouldn't find the right one at all. Was it possible not to give their daughter a name at all? Would she always be 'baby'? No, they had to agree in something in the end. But Blaine's names were so boring and he didn't seem like he liked Kurt's names at all. So what? Should they pick a random name from the book?

"Have you found the right name?" Mercedes asked as she stepped into their living room, Sam following her closely with a large box in his hands.

"Please don't ask us about it" Kurt groaned.

"I guess that's a no" Mercedes smirked.

"You have no idea how hard it is" Kurt said. "There are so many names and our taste is so different. We just can't find one we both like."

"I'm sure you'll find the right one" Sam said.

"You have to. You don't have much time left" Mercedes reminded them.

Kurt hoped that they would get a sign or something because it was getting really frustrating. It didn't help that their friends kept reminding them how little time they had left to solve the problem.

The others arrived soon, at least Kurt's friends. He knew that Blaine had invited his own friends as well, now that he and Jeff were fine again, Kurt had insisted to let them know about the party, hoping that they had a chance to get to know each other. He was a little worried about Jeff but hoped that they would get to know each other better and it wouldn't be a problem anymore.

"Do you have everything ready?" Rachel asked as she and Finn joined the others in the living room.

"We still don't have the name" Kurt said.

"That's hard for sure" Rachel nodded. "It's a huge decision to make. You have to make the right choice."

"And they will" Santana said.

"Why don't you just call miracle? It's such a beautiful name" Brittany said. "Or you could name her after the club where you met."

"We want a common name" Blaine said.

"Well, he wants that" Kurt said.

"I thought you agreed with me" Blaine frowned.

"I accepted that you don't like my ideas. It doesn't mean I want a boring name for our daughter" Kurt replied.

"There are so many beautiful names, I'm pretty sure you'll find the right one" Mercedes said.

"Did you ask Burt?" Finn asked.

"No. Why?" Kurt asked.

"Because he mentioned once what they picked for you when they didn't know if you were a boy or a girl" Finn said.

"Oh, yes, I remember that, too" Rachel nodded.

"I'll call him" Kurt said. He knew what Finn was talking about but he had forgotten about it. But it made sense. He didn't remember the name but his father always had the best ideas. Maybe he could help them.

"I thought he was here" Mercedes said.

"He was, but he had to return to Lima" Kurt sighed. "He has some trouble in the shop."

"Such a shame. I miss Mr H" Santana said.

"Me too" Brittany said.

"He'll come back once the baby arrives" Kurt told them. "He and Carole want to spend a few weeks in New York, so they can help us around the baby."

"Mom will be here, too? They never told me" Finn frowned.

"Maybe because you never asked" Kurt pointed out.

The doorbell rang again and Kurt stood up to greet the new guest. Sebastian promised them that he would come over if he could leave work sooner, so Kurt expected to find him there. He was surprised when he opened the door and found Jeff and Wes standing there with two huge boxes. He almost forgot about them while talking to his friends.

"Hey" Wes greeted him with a huge smile. "May we come in?"

"Of course" Kurt said and quickly took a step backwards to let them in.

Although he had told Blaine that he was fine around Jeff, now that the man was standing right in front of him, he was getting nervous. He remembered how the last time had ended and he was somewhat worried that Jeff might say horrible things again. He was too sensitive for that, he wasn't sure if he could take something bad again.

"We brought you presents" Jeff said happily and showed Kurt the box in his hands.

"Thank you" Kurt said.

"You'll love them" Jeff winked.

Well, if Kurt had been worried before, it was absolutely unnecessary. At least it seemed like everything was fine with Jeff. He seemed happy and excited, he didn't show the tiniest sign of anger. It made Kurt relieved. He knew that Jeff didn't talk about his feelings, although he expected an apology or something, but he was so happy that they were fine that he just let it go. He wanted to have fun with his friends, nothing more.

"Show us the nursery" Rachel said after a while. "You said that we could see it once it's ready."

"It's not completely ready…"

"Come on. I'll show you" Blaine smiled.

"But I still have to..."

"Kurt, the baby won't care if we don't finish the decoration in the nursery" Blaine said patiently.

"I still want a few butterflies over the crib…"

"And I'll help you with them" Blaine replied.

"I'm glad you don't fight anymore" Mercedes said.

"We've learned how to deal with our problems" Kurt said. He was really proud of themselves that they got through their misunderstandings.

"So… nursery?" Rachel reminded them again.

"Here it is" Blaine said proudly and opened the door for the guests.

He knew that they did a great job in there. Kurt had a lot of ideas and he helped him a lot to pick the perfect pieces for their baby. The result was wonderful. Blaine didn't really like pink, but the one Kurt chose for the walls with the white and light green decoration was simply beautiful. They mostly chose white furniture but the accessories were colorful.

"This is beautiful" Mercedes said in awe.

"We did it" Kurt said happily.

"I see" Mercedes smiled.

"You're so talented" Rachel said.

"You could live from this" Jeff agreed.

Kurt was glad that their friends liked what they had done to this place. They wanted the best for their baby and he knew that the room was perfect.

"You have to do something similar for our daughter" Santana said.

Everyone turned to look at her in surprise.

"What?" she shrugged.

"Does it mean that you and Brittany…"

"One day soon" Santana smiled.

"I thought it was a secret" Brittany said in confusion.

"Yeah, but I thought about it. We can trust our friends to keep our secret…"

Kurt snorted. That was the last thing he would say about them. He loved their friends but keeping his secret… that never worked.

"I hope that now that you're going to be parents, you're mature enough" Santana corrected herself.

"And what about the rest of us?" Rachel frowned.

"Oh, no. You two should never reproduce yourselves" Santana said. "Just think about. What if you have a daughter, too? At least Kurt and Blaine look quite well. They have the best chances to have a more or less acceptable looking child…"

"Thanks" Blaine muttered.

"...But do you really want to give birth to a giant with enormous nose? That would be so cruel of you" Santana said.

"That was rude" Kurt told him.

"Was it?" Santana asked innocently.

"It was" Brittany nodded. "I already told you, it doesn't matter what people look like. Besides, if their daughter is tall enough, nobody will notice how big her nose is."

"Who's hungry?" Kurt asked quickly. This conversation took an unexpected turn and he didn't want to see his friends fight. Not now when they could spend an afternoon together, probably the last time before the baby's birth. He wouldn't let anyone ruin this day.

"I am" Finn said, Santana's words completely forgotten.

"Me too" Blaine said and put an arm around Rachel to pull her away from Santana. "We made your favorite salad."

Kurt went to help Blaine but his boyfriend seemed to be fine on his own. He told Kurt to sit down and let him handle everything. Kurt was about to tell him that he was fine but he knew that Blaine wouldn't listen to him. He was still worried that something might happen to Kurt and the baby. Kurt was a lot calmer now, since nothing had happened in the previous few weeks and they were so close to the end of the pregnancy, he didn't think he should be so careful anymore.

Blaine filled a plate with everything Kurt liked and put it down in front of his boyfriend. Kurt closed his eyes and hummed happily as he tried the various types of cheese Blaine had bought. It was his newest craving, probably the last one because the pregnancy was almost over. He could eat cheese every time of the day, he preferred it with fresh bread but usually he chose vegetables instead. He had to be healthy and the baby needed the best, too. He couldn't be careless when it was about his daughter's health.

"Do you need something else?" Blaine asked when Kurt finished eating.

"I'm fine, Blaine. Sit down a bit" Kurt said.

"He's right. Sit down and open your presents" Wes said excitedly.

"Do I even want to know what you bought for us?" Blaine asked carefully, knowing his friends way too well.

"Probably no" Wes shrugged.

"He's just joking" Jeff said. "Open this one first."

Blaine took the box from Jeff and opened it, only to find a smaller boy inside. He raised an eyebrow as he looked at his friend.

"Seriously?"

"Open the next one" Wes said.

Blaine opened box after box but still didn't get to their present. The boxes were smaller and smaller until he reached one that was barely bigger than his hand.

"This is the last one, I swear" Wes said.

Blaine sighed and opened the box. He was pretty sure that there was another one inside, so he was surprised when he found out that Wes told him the truth this time. He emptied the box, so everyone could see the two books. One for the baby with short bedtime stories and another for the parents about how to make the baby sleep in various situations.

"We thought you could use them" Jeff shrugged.

"We will definitely use them" Kurt smiled. He loved the presents they got. They would be useful for sure.

"If they don't work…" Jeff started as he pushed the other box into Blaine's hands.

Blaine opened the other box and laughed as he peeked inside. He pulled Kurt close, so he could see it too.

"A coffee machine?" Kurt asked in confusion.

"You won't sleep too much in the first year or so, so you'll need this" Jeff said. "It's a lot more comfortable than going to the coffee shop three times a day. I don't even know why Blaine never bought one."

"I love coffee shops" Blaine muttered.

"And you'll love that you can make yourself your favorite coffee every single day" Jeff replied.

"I think you're right" Kurt nodded.

They were about to open the next present when the doorbell rang. Blaine stood up and walked to the door to open it. A very exhausting looking Sebastian stepped inside and groaned when his eyes landed on the boxes all over the room and Kurt sitting in the middle of the mess with his huge baby bump.

"Long day?" Kurt asked knowingly.

"You have no idea" Sebastian said. "If I don't see pregnant women in the next twenty years, that will be too soon."

"There are no pregnant women in this room, I promise" Kurt smiled. "Come on, join us."

"I hope you won't give birth today" Sebastian said carefully. "Because it seems like everybody goes to labor today. Is this the official give-birth-to-your-baby day or what?"

"A coffee?" Blaine offered.

"No, thanks. I had too many coffees today" Sebastian said.

"Well, we don't have anything strong but I can offer you lemonade, orange juice…"

"Lemonade will be fine" Sebastian said. He looked around again and finally realized that they were in the middle of opening presents. "Oh. Are those presents? I'm glad you didn't open them all without me."

"Don't tell me you like presents" Blaine said a she returned with Sebastian's glass.

"I love presents" Sebastian replied and pushed a box into Kurt's hands. "Open it."

"It's from us" Rachel said.

Kurt opened the box and smiled as he pulled out the beautiful clothes. He had seen them at the mall a few months earlier, when he hadn't even known that he would have a daughter. He had gone back after that but he hadn't found them again.

"How…"

"I knew it was a girl" Rachel shrugged.

"You bought these clothes months ago and kept it secret from me?" Kurt asked in awe. Rachel always told him everything.

"I saw how you looked at them and I thought it would be a good present" Rachel answered.

"I love them" Kurt smiled.

"Now open this" Mercedes said and pushed the box they had brought forward.

"Just give me a minute" Kurt said as he stood up. "I'm sorry, guys, but the baby can't stop moving today and…"

Kurt took a step towards the bathroom but stopped immediately when he heard a small popping sound. The next thing he knew, his pants were soaked in something warm. For a second he was afraid that he had an accident right in front of his friends but the worried expression of Blaine told him that something else might be going on. Like...

"No" Kurt said immediately.

"Dude, I know that these weeks are hard but couldn't you get to the bathroom in time?" Finn asked, seemingly shocked to see something like this happen during a baby shower.

"His water broke, you idiot" Santana explained him.

"Wait, does it mean that…"

Kurt turned to Sebastian for explanation. The man only sighed and pushed himself up from the couch.

"So this IS the official give-birth-to-your-baby day" Sebastian said. "I guess we should cut this party short because there is another one waiting for us in the hospital."

Kurt grabbed Blaine's arm for support. He was pretty sure that he was going to be sick.


	30. Chapter 30

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.**

On the way to the hospital, Blaine was wondering if he had ever seen Kurt panicking so much. He had thought that Kurt would be the calmer once they reached this point, but he realized how wrong he had been. Kurt was seemingly terrified. He couldn't sit still for a second, he could barely breath properly, and he squeezed Blaine's hand so tightly that the man thought he would break it. Blaine was really not good in these situations. He tried to figure out what to say to help Kurt calm down a bit, but his brain simply wasn't functioning.

"It's all natural, Kurt" he said in the end. "Just try to relax."

"Relax? Do you have any idea how much it hurts?" Kurt shouted.

"Why are you yelling at me?" Blaine asked in surprise.

"Because you're not helping!"

"I'm trying, okay?"

"Guys, shut up" Sebastian groaned. "Kurt, you have to calm down. It's gonna be alright. We'll take that baby out in no time. Blaine, be patient. Giving birth hurts, a lot. Try to be more understanding."

"I'm not ready" Kurt said. "I-I can't do this. I just can't."

"It's gonna be alright" Blaine said, trying to be as patient and calm as possible. Maybe Sebastian was right. Kurt was seemingly panicking and he needed someone to help him through this. He needed Blaine.

"I-I need more time" Kurt said as if he didn't hear Blaine at all. "It's too soon."

"Calm down" Sebastian said again. "It's not too soon at all. Your baby comes somewhat earlier, so what? She's healthy and ready. You have nothing to be scared of."

"I was so stupid" Kurt continued. Blaine was pretty sure that he was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't even hear them. "What was I thinking? I knew that it would be hard. It would be horrible. I had so many options. I should have adopted a baby. What if something goes wrong? What if I won't be able to see her at all?"

"Kurt, you have to calm down" Blaine said. He turned towards Kurt and squeezed his hand, hoping that Kurt listened to him. "I know it's hard. I know that you're terrified but you have to believe that everything will be fine. You're not alone, okay? I'm here and I won't let anything happene to you. Or our baby."

"We don't even have names!"

"Is that your biggest problem? Really?" Sebastian asked.

Blaine was about to tell him how insensitive he was and that Kurt needed their support more than ever, but Sebastian didn't give him time to reply. As Blaine realized, they were already in the parking lot of the hospital.

"Blaine, take him to the third floor. I'll make everything ready" Sebastian said quickly and left before Blaine could say anything.

Blaine took a deep breath and turned to face Kurt again. He was all alone with his boyfriend who was about to give birth to their child. Kurt, who was already panicking and Blaine was the only one there to help him. Blaine wanted to panic, too, but then he looked at Kurt again and knew that he had to be strong. For his family.

"Alright" he nodded. "Take deep breaths, okay? It's almost over. You're doing wonderfully."

"I can't do it, Blaine" Kurt said, seemingly close to tears. "I'm so scared! I can't go in there."

"You have to" Blaine said gently. "Sebastian has to take the baby out or else something might happen to you and our daughter. You don't want that, right?"

Kurt simply shook his head.

"You're not alone" Blaine continued. "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."

"Not even to the bathroom?" Kurt asked.

"Not even there" Blaine said, doing his best not to laugh. Although there was nothing funny in the situation, Kurt was simply not himself and it surprised Blaine so much that he had no idea how to act around his boyfriend. He had to be careful for sure.

Blaine kept his promise for a while. He helped Kurt get out of his clothes and get ready for the C-section. He did his best to stay calm and it looked like it helped Kurt a lot, too. But then a nurse let them know that Blaine had to stay outside during the surgery and Kurt started to panic again.

"You can't leave me alone!"

"Kurt, I'm not going anywhere. I promise" Blaine said patiently.

"But you won't be there" Kurt said quietly.

"I'll be right at the door and go to you as soon as I can" Blaine said.

"Blaine, I'm so scared."

"I know" Blaine nodded. "But you're the strongest person I know and I believe in you."

"If something goes wrong…"

"I trust Sebastian" Blaine said quickly.

"I think I trust him, too" Kurt said quietly.

"I love you" Blaine said. "And I'm so proud of you."

"I'm panicking."

"Like everybody else in this situation" Blaine said. "Go, honey. I'll be waiting here."

Blaine made sure he kept smiling until Kurt could see him. He didn't let the smallest sign of fear show on his face, not until he was alone. But when the door closed, he almost collapsed. He had to find a chair and sit down because he was pretty sure that he would get sick. Or faint. Or both. Sebastian was about to cut Kurt up to take out their baby. It was a huge thing, a huge and terrifying one. He was lucky that he wasn't allowed to be in there, so he didn't have to see anything, but Kurt had to go through everything. And it scared Blaine.

Now he regretted leaving their friends home. Finn had wanted to come with them, just like the girls, but Sebastian had told them that it was unnecessary, that they wouldn't be able to see Kurt or the baby for a good while and it was better for everyone if they stayed home. Blaine, on the other hand, needed someone. Time passed so slowly and he knew nothing about Kurt or the baby. It was horrible. He needed someone to talk to but he was all alone.

When he was just about to find someone to ask about the surgery, the door finally opened and Sebastian stepped out. He seemed exhausted, more than before, and Blaine was scared that something happened. Something really-really bad.

"What's wrong?" he asked desperately. "Please, don't tell me that something happened to them. I just… No, that can't be."

"Relax" Sebastian said. "Why do you think that something is wrong?"

"Because you seem so tired!"

"Can you blame me? I don't even remember when was the last time I slept" Sebastian said.

"So…"

"So what?" Sebastian asked, as if he didn't know what Blaine wanted from him. As if he wasn't worried about Kurt and the baby.

"What happened to Kurt?" Blaine asked impatiently. He needed to know if everything was alright, right in that moment.

"He panicked" Sebastian said. "I can't believe he was so scared. I mean, he knew very well that the baby had to come out somehow…"

"Is he alright?" Blaine asked quietly.

"Of course he is" Sebastian said easily.

"Thank God" Blaine sighed in relief. He quickly found a chair to sit down because his legs were shaking so badly that he could barely stand on them.

"I think you forgot about someone" Sebastian reminded him.

Oh, yes. The baby. Blaine was so relieved to hear that Kurt was fine that he almost forgot about the baby.

"Is she okay?" he asked.

"Yep. Completely healthy. And loud. Way too loud if you want my opinion" Sebastian replied.

Blaine fell silent. It was so hard to believe that it was over. It felt like a dream, nothing more. He was waiting for something to happen but everything was the same. He didn't feel like a father. Something must have been wrong with him.

"Blaine, are you okay?" Sebastian asked.

"I don't know" Blaine muttered.

"Do you want to see her?" Sebastian asked.

See. The baby. His baby. Right.

"Uhm. Sure" Blaine said.

"You don't seem too excited" Sebastian pointed out.

Now Blaine was in panic. Something was definitely wrong with him. Sebastian met men, new fathers every single day. They were surely different. It meant that something was very wrong. Was he unable to love his daughter? Would he be a terrible father, just like his own? No, that couldn't happen. He couldn't be like that.

He tried to breath properly as they made their way down the corridor. He heard people talking in the background and as they were getting closer to their destination, he could hear the loud noises of several babies. One of them could be his own. Now he was definitely nervous. He was afraid that he would screw up, that he wouldn't be able to love his daughter the way he wanted to. That she would hate him. Was it possible? Babies didn't really hate anyone, right? Maybe he had some more time to get used to the idea of having a child and become a good father. He wanted it so badly.

"Stay here" Sebastian told him.

Blaine stayed there in silence while Sebastian talked to a woman and came back with a hospital baby cart a few minutes later. There was a little girl, almost completely covered in a pink blanket. Blaine could only see her face. She wasn't crying like so many others. She was awake but completely silent. She seemed to be confused as she looked around.

And then her eyes found Blaine and the man knew that he was lost. His own eyes met the most beautiful blue ones he had ever seen. Blaine felt like he could start crying in any second. Damn, he was already crying. He was so happy to finally see his daughter that he couldn't not cry. The feeling was simply overwhelming.

"I think Kurt wants to see you, too" Sebastian said. "You can take the baby to him, but only for a little while."

"Okay" Blaine said quietly.

"I know it's hard but you shouldn't cry. You wanted this baby after all" Sebastian said.

"Hm… what?"

"You should stop crying. Having a baby might be awful but you shouldn't give up so easily" Sebastian said.

"What are you talking about? I'm just happy to see her" Blaine said indignantly.

"Oh. Oh! Okay. I thought you were upset because you realized that your life was over."

Blaine sighed. Sebastian couldn't understand how he felt. He might have seen couples with children every single day but he had no idea what it was like when you first met your own child.

"So, do you want to see Kurt?" Sebastian asked.

"Of course" Blaine nodded.

At least they were lucky to have Sebastian as their friend. The man stayed with Blaine until they reached another room and told him a few things about newborns. It was definitely useful. Blaine had read a lot of books about babies but now that his daughter was born, he couldn't remember a thing. He was nervous that he might do something wrong. He hoped that it would get easier with practice. It shouldn't be that hard, right? So many people had children and they managed to keep them alive. He wasn't alone with the job, he had Kurt, too, and Kurt had to know what to do. They would be fine.

Kurt was alone in a small room with white walls and practically no decoration. Blaine knew that Kurt hated places like this and he definitely hated hospitals, but it didn't seem to bother him right now. Kurt seemed exhausted and must have been asleep before they came in there.

"Don't move, remember?" Sebastian told him as they walked inside. "You have to stay in bed for a few more hours. But you can have visitors."

Kurt was fully awake in a blink. He turned his head, so he could see Blaine and smiled at him.

"Hey" Blaine greeted him. "I have someone you should see."

Kurt almost pushed himself up from the bed but Sebastian reminded him again that he should stay still. He sighed and let his head fall back to the pillow.

"I just want to see her" Kurt said.

"You can take her out, Blaine" Sebastian said.

Blaine gulped nervously. He looked down at his daughter who was so small and seemed so vulnerable. He was afraid that he would break her. He reached out with shaky hands but pulled them back almost immediately. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea. What if he did something wrong? What if he hurt his child?

"Oh, come on, it's not that hard" Sebastian said and stepped to them. "See? Just make sure you hold her head."

Sebastian pulled the baby into his arms with practiced ease but didn't give Blaine time to enjoy the sight of his child. He pushed the baby into the man's arms before Blaine could protest and stepped back.

"I have to take care of a few things. Bye, guys" he said as he turned to leave.

"But…"

Sebastian left so quickly that Blaine had no chance to say anything. He was left there so suddenly that he stayed frozen for a good while, his wide eyes on the baby in his arms. She was still quiet, she watched him with slightly furrowed eyebrows, as if she wondered who he could be. Blaine wanted to say something but he simply panicked. He wanted to move but he was scared of doing anything, terrified that he might hurt the baby.

"Can you bring her here?"

Blaine turned slowly to look at Kurt. He was so pale but he was smiling. He reached out towards them, silently asking Blaine to let him hold the baby. Blaine nodded. He knew that he wasn't thinking rationally. They had practiced this so many times. He knew how to hold a baby after all. He had nothing to be scared of.

He walked to Kurt's bed and sat down beside him. He was careful not to make a bad move, like hitting the baby's head into the edge of the nightstand or something equally horrible. Then he stopped. He knew that Kurt wanted to hold the baby but he had no idea how to let go of her without risking her safety. He was definitely the worst father of the world.

"It's okay, Blaine. You're doing wonderfully" Kurt said calmly.

"I'm terrified" Blaine admitted.

"Why?" Kurt asked.

"Because she's so small" Blaine answered. "Just look at her. I'm scared of doing something wrong."

"You have to calm down a bit" Kurt said. "She'll feel that you're scared."

Blaine was about to tell him that his fear was perfectly rational and Kurt should take it more seriously because now they had a child to take care of, but before he could say anything, the baby started crying. At the same time, Blaine panicked, again.

"What-what should I do?" he asked.

"Try to soothe her" Kurt told him.

"How?" Blaine asked. He had no idea what to do. He didn't remember a thing he had read about babies.

"Just rock her. Slowly. And talk to her" Kurt said.

Blaine tried to do so but the baby only became louder.

"She hates me" Blaine said desperately.

"Blaine, you have to calm down a bit" Kurt told him.

"I'm calm. I'm calm" Blaine said, hoping that it would help him. It didn't seem to work, though.

"Alright. Give her to me" Kurt said in the end.

Blaine's eyes widened in fear. Did Kurt honestly think that he could let go of the baby without doing something wrong? Why did Kurt trust him so much? It didn't make any sense.

"Just slowly" Kurt said. He was surprisingly calm, especially after how he had panicked when they had arrived. "It's okay, Blaine. You won't break her."

Blaine stood up and slowly put the baby down, careful to hold her head with one hand. At least he remembered that it was important. He let the baby's head rest on Kurt's arm while he laid her down onto the bed beside Kurt. Once it was down and the baby was safe in Kurt's arm, Blaine took a step back, taking a deep breath to calm his nerves.

Kurt seemed like he was the calmest person of the world. He looked down at the baby in his arm as if he knew exactly what he had to do. And there was so much love in his eyes. Blaine culdn't take his eyes off of his face.

"Hey, honey" Kurt said gently. "I'm so happy to finally meet you."

To Blaine's surprise, the baby stopped crying almost immediately. She kept her huge eyes on Kurt and she seemed surprised again.

"Do you recognize my voice?" Kurt asked quietly. "You're the most beautiful girl of the world, you know that, right?"

Blaine stepped back to the bed and sat down. Kurt was beautiful with their baby. Okay, he was beautiful no matter what, but now that he had their child in his arms… it was simply the most beautiful sight Blaine had ever seen.

"That's it baby" Kurt continued. "You have nothing to be scared of. We're here and we won't let anything happen to you."

"You're wonderful" Blaine muttered.

Kurt looked up at him and smiled.

"I can't believe we have a baby" Kurt said.

"Me neither" Blaine laughed. "It's so…"

"Overwhelming. I know" Kurt nodded. "But it's also… magical."

Kurt was right. Having a baby, a small, vulnerable child to take care of was terrifying. But it was also a wonderful thing. Blaine could finally feel it.

"It's gonna be okay" Kurt said. "You'll be a wonderful father."

Blaine sighed but said nothing. He hoped that Kurt was right because he wanted to be a good father. A lot better than his own. He wanted to raise this little girl the best he could and show her how much he loved her.

"I love you."

Blaine looked up in surprise. Kurt was watching him this time, with that cute little smile on his face again.

"I love you, too" he said.

And then it hit him. There was a very good way to show Kurt how much he loved him. He had been thinking about it for a good while, especially after his talk with Jeff. Now it was time to take that step. He only had to find the best way to ask Kurt that very important question.


	31. Chapter 31

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I hope you're enjoying the holidays!**

 **I know you've been waiting for this chapter. I hope you'll like it.**

The following day passed quickly. Kurt took the C-section really well, Blaine was so proud of him. He was able to leave bed only a few hours after the surgery, and although he was still in pain, he didn't show any sign of weakness. He acted like nothing happened. Okay, he was somewhat slower than usually. Blaine was used to his full-of-energy boyfriend and Kurt seemed a little more careful this time. He was also pale but that wasn't new. Kurt still seemed to be doing well, he was happy and whenever Blaine shared his worries with him, Kurt simply waved him off.

"I'm fine, Blaine" he said. "More than fine, actually. Everything is perfect!"

Kurt had been so scared of giving birth and now here he was, acting like nothing happened. As if he didn't even remember the last few hours before their daughter's birth. Blaine, on the other hand, remembered everything clearly. And he was worried that Kurt's bright mood might change again and he had to face desperation together. Okay, maybe he was overreacting, but it was simply too good to be true. Blaine was prepared for the worst and it was so hard to believe that things might be easy for them, just once. It was better to be ready for everything. At least nothing would surprise him.

Watching Kurt with the baby was wonderful. The man seemed so peaceful when he held their daughter in his arms. He wasn't even worried that he might drop the baby. Blaine was more careful but he pulled the baby into his arms every time he could, so he could figure out how to hold the baby securely. He wanted to help Kurt the best he could. He didn't want to be like his father. No, he couldn't. He would love his daughter and be the best father possible.

Only it didn't come so naturally. Kurt seemed to know everything about babies but Blaine forgot everything he had read about them. It had been easy in theory, but it was a lot harder with a real living baby. She was so small. Blaine was scared that he might hurt her.

"You're doing that again."

Blaine jumped as Kurt's voice brought him out of his thoughts and tightened his arms around the baby, so he wouldn't drop her.

"Doing what?" Blaine asked. He kept his eyes on the baby to make sure he didn't do anything wrong.

"Don't be so nervous, Blaine" Kurt said gently. "Relax. You know what you have to do."

"Do you really think so?" Blaine asked desperately.

"Of course I do" Kurt nodded. "You're a wonderful father."

Blaine sighed heavily. He didn't know what a good father was like but he was far from that. He had imagined what it would be like after his child's birth. This definitely wasn't what he expected.

"I don't want to screw up" he said suddenly.

"You won't" Kurt replied.

"How do you know?" Blaine asked. "I-I don't even know what to do with her. These days are so important and-and I…"

"Sh" Kurt said gently. "Just close your eyes and relax. Don't worry so much."

"How can you be so calm? We're responsible for her. It's a huge thing" Blaine said.

"I know" Kurt nodded. "But I wanted this so badly. And now that we have her… my life is complete."

He mover closer to Blaine and kissed his cheek.

"I love you so much" he said.

"I love you, too" Blaine said. "And her."

They looked down at the baby and sighed. That was a problem they had to deal with, fast. They didn't have a name for the baby. It wasn't like they didn't have ideas, they had, but none of them seemed to be the right one. They tried absolutely everything. They had asked their friends for help, they had talked to Burt – who had arrived surprisingly quickly after learning the news, by the way –, they had gone through the book once again and they had checked the name tags of every possible employee in the hospital who came into their way.

Nothing.

There were names Kurt liked, others that Blaine liked, but none that fitted their baby. It made everything harder that they didn't really know their child. They knew that she was beautiful and peaceful, at least for now, but they didn't know what she would be like later. They could name her Melody, for example, but what if she would have a terrible voice?

She couldn't stay without a name either. Blaine was getting tired of calling their daughter baby and Kurt must have felt the same way. They also wanted to enjoy their time as parents, without wasting precious hours for names when they could enjoy the sight of their baby instead. Blaine came up with a surprising idea in the end, telling Kurt that they should just open the book at a random page and pick a name from there.

"This is about the name of our child! We have to take it seriously!"

Maybe Kurt was right. It didn't help them, though.

Blaine had another problem on his own. When he went home from the hospital, telling Kurt that he had to make everything ready for their arrival, he went through his things, searching for the ring. He needed a ring if he wanted to propose and that was exactly what he wanted to do. When he finally found it, hidden deep in a drawer, Blaine raised it in front of his eyes and smiled. Only for a second. Then he remembered how his last proposal had gone and decided that asking Kurt to marry him with that ring again wasn't a good idea after all. So he had to buy a new one and then figure out how to present it. Because Kurt deserved a real proposal, a romantic one with candles and delicious food and everything possible.

Blaine spent all his time back to the hospital planning the details. Which restaurant he would choose, when he would do it, what he would say… Only to forget about the whole thing when he finally arrived and found his family lying in the bed together.

Yeah. They had a newborn. Someone who couldn't really go to restaurant, at least for a few more weeks. Maybe even more. Blaine knew himself well enough to know that he couldn't wait so long. He wanted to propose, as soon as possible. So he had to find another solution.

"Is everything okay?" Kurt asked when Blaine joined them.

"Of course" Blaine said, his voice shaking.

"You don't seem fine" Kurt pointed out.

"Where is your dad?" Blaine asked to change topic. "He wasn't home."

"He went shopping with Rachel" Kurt snorted. "He said he had to buy a few more presents for the baby."

"Again?" Blaine asked. Burt had already bought a lot of things for the baby, clothes, toys, everything they needed and didn't need. He was awfully excited to have a granddaughter.

"He's just happy" Kurt shrugged. "Let him do whatever he wants."

"If we let him buy everything he wants for the baby, we won't have any space for ourselves in our home soon" Blaine said.

"Is it a bad thing?" Kurt smiled.

Blaine looked down at the baby. He understood Burt's excitement, he wanted to pamper his child, too. But it was hard when Kurt's family and their friends brought everything he wanted for the baby.

"They should just leave something for us, too" Blaine said.

"Well, it's not like we'll go anywhere anytime soon" Kurt shrugged.

Blaine looked at him in confusion.

"I mean, from home" Kurt corrected himself. "I don't want anything to happen to her."

Blaine understood that, although he was pretty sure that once the first weeks were gone, they wouldn't be so careful anymore. Would they? He saw so many parents with small children outside. He wanted to be just like them. A cool father who brought his daughter everywhere.

"We seriously have to find a name for her" Blaine muttered. "It's getting frustrating."

"I couldn't agree more."

They looked up to find Sebastian standing at the open door. Kurt's eyes landed on the clipboard in his hands and but his lip nervously.

"Is there something wrong with the baby?" he asked in concern.

"Yes, we have a serious problem" Sebastian said.

"Oh, no" Kurt's eyes widened. "You can't…"

Sebastian burst into laughter, seeing how worried Kurt was.

"That's not funny!"

"It is" Sebastian said. "Come on, use your head. Does she look like there's something wrong with her?"

"How am I supposed to know?" Kurt asked back.

"As I already told you about a million times, your baby is fine" Sebastian said. "Although there is a problem. She needs a name."

"We know" Blaine sighed.

"And what would it be?" Sebastian asked-

"We have no idea" Kurt admitted.

"Just give her a name. It's not that hard" Sebastian said easily.

"Yes, it is" Kurt said. "What if she won't like the name we give her?"

"She can change it" Sebastian shrugged.

"It's not like we don't have ideas" Blaine explained. "But there are so many possibilities..."

"Don't tell me you never thought about what your kids' names would be" Sebastian snorted.

"You say that as if you know what your child's name would be" Kurt said.

"Because I do" Sebastian replied. "Well, I won't use it, obviously, you know that I'm that type, but…"

"But if you had a daughter…"

"I would name her Emily" Sebastian said. "After my grandmother. The only person in my family who wasn't completely insane."

Blaine thought that Kurt would tell them why he didn't like the name, like every other time. Kurt was quiet this time, though. Blaine looked at him and find his boyfriend watching their baby with a small smile on his face.

"Is there something wrong?" Blaine asked.

"No" Kurt said. "I just… I think it's a beautiful name. What do you think?"

"I think that we shouldn't steal it from Sebastian" Blaine said, although he agreed with Kurt. He couldn't believe it didn't catch their attention. It was a perfect name.

"You heard me. I won't use it at all" Sebastian said. "I see babies every day. That's enough for me. I don't want one on my own."

"Really?" Blaine asked.

"Can you imagine me with a kid?" Sebastian asked.

No, he couldn't. Blaine didn't want to hurt him, though.

"So if we named her after your grandmother…"

"It's fine" Sebastian shrugged. "I wouldn't mind at all. Knowing you, you wouldn't find another name in the next two years, so…"

Blaine looked at Kurt again who slowly nodded.

"You mean we have a name?" he asked.

"I think we have. The right one" Kurt smiled.

~ o ~

Since Kurt was feeling better and the baby was completely fine, the name problem solved, they were finally allowed to go home. Blaine planned everything perfectly. He bought Kurt's favorites for dinner, he decorated the living room, made sure the nursery was perfect. And, of course, he had the ring. It hadn't been easy to get the perfect one, especially with running back and forth between the hospital and their home, with Burt watching him almost all the time, but Blaine managed to find the right one. And he couldn't wait to ask Kurt that question. He planned to do it after going home with the baby, after having a nice dinner with Kurt, but, as lucky as he was, things didn't go too easily.

First of all, there was Burt who noticed that something was off with him in no time. And once he noticed it, he started asking questions Blaine wasn't sure he could answer.

"Seriously, I'm starting to get worried" Burt said honestly. "Something isn't right with you."

Blaine looked at him and took a deep breath. Although they were adults, he knew that he should ask for Burt's permission to ask Kurt to marry him. That was how things worked, right? But then he looked at the man and he was just too scared to talk.

"You won't leave my son and my granddaughter, right?" Burt asked.

"What? No! Of course not" Blaine gasped. How could Burt come up with such a horrible idea?

"I hope you won't" Burt said. "Kurt's in a very fragile state right now and he needs you. If you hurt my son…"

"I would never do that" Blaine said quickly.

"Then what's wrong with you?" Burt asked.

"Nothing" Blaine said, his voice shaking.

Burt wasn't easy to fool. Blaine tried to come up with a good excuse to leave but he had a feeling that Burt wouldn't leave him alone.

"You're hiding something" Burt continued before Blaine had a chance to talk. "What is it? Are you on drugs?"

"What?" Blaine frowned. This conversation became weirder and weirder with every second.

"Is it about another guy?" Burt asked next.

"Oh, come on. That was a mistake" Blaine said, rolling his eyes.

"Wait, what?" Burt asked.

Blaine gulped nervously. Maybe Burt didn't even know about that. And it was better to leave it that way. He was pretty sure that Burt wouldn't be too happy to hear that he was dating another man, even if it was just to make Kurt jealous.

"Nothing" Blaine said in a small voice.

"I'll say it again. If you hurt my son…"

"I just want to marry him!" Blaine shouted suddenly.

They both fell silent for a while. Burt seemed so surprised, it was seemingly the last thing that came into his mind. Blaine watched him carefully, afraid of what Burt would say. Then something unexpected happened. A huge smile appeared on Burt's face and he pulled Blaine into a hug.

"Finally!" he said.

"So you aren't mad?" Blaine asked hesitantly.

"Of course not! It's about time! I was surprised that you didn't get married before the baby's birth" Burt said.

Blaine tried to say something but nothing came out. He was prepared for everything but this.

"When are you going to propose?" Burt asked.

"I don't know…"

"They're coming home" Burt continued. "Kurt would surely appreciate a nice dinner. You know, with candles and stuff. He likes those things."

"I know. I was thinking about that but…" Blaine fell silent again.

"Oh. Oh!" Burt said. "You want me to be gone. That's fine."

"I don't want to kick you out…"

"It's okay. I can stay with Finn and Rachel for a while" Burt shrugged.

It was so easy. Blaine thought that he had to convince Burt to give them some private time but it looked like it was completely unnecessary.

"Don't worry. I'll make sure no one disturbs you tonight" Burt said.

"You-you mean I should propose tonight?" Blaine asked in a small voice. It wasn't like he didn't want to know the answer but it seemed too soon. He needed more time for a perfect proposal.

"Of course you should. It's gonna be a wonderful night, your first one together as a family. The timing is perfect!"

Blaine wasn't so sure. He knew that their friends wanted to come over to see the baby and Kurt would be exhausted after such a long day. He needed rest. Burt seemed to know what he was thinking about and already had a solution.

"I'll talk to the others. You don't have to do anything but prepare dinner" Burt said. "You should order something. From that place Kurt likes so much."

"Okay" Blaine muttered. It was strange that Burt gave him advice how to propose.

"Can you cook?" Burt asked next. "Oh, yes, you can. You should do something then. That would be much better."

Blaine simply nodded. He didn't want to say no, not when Burt was so excited. He had to get over with this tonight. Maybe it was for the best. He didn't have much time to panic or think about the details too much. He had a better chance not to ruin everything like he always did when he was nervous.

~ o ~

It was an exhausting day. Kurt couldn't wait to go home and have a good sleep in his own bed. He hated hospitals. They were too noisy and smelled weird. He also missed Blaine a lot. Although he was pretty sure that his family and their friends would come over to see Emily, he hoped that they would get over with it fast. Too bad Blaine wasn't in the mood to talk. He was weirdly quiet and Kurt was afraid that he had a fight with his father while Kurt was gone.

"Is everything alright?" Kurt asked.

"Sure" Blaine answered.

"You're so quiet" Kurt pointed out.

"I'm fine" Blaine said quickly. "Perfectly fine. I just can't wait to be home."

"You're not the only one" Kurt said.

They stepped through the door. Blaine let Kurt in first and then followed him with the baby and Kurt's stuff in his hands. Kurt hoped that everything was ready for the baby. Blaine had enough time to clean up in the apartment and check if they had everything. He didn't want to go shopping his first day home, especially not so late. He had expected Blaine a lot sooner but he had been late for some reason. Kurt didn't understand why, at least not until he stepped into their home.

His eyes found the perfectly decorated table with candles and flowers in no time. There were rose petals on the floor, and although Kurt was worried about leaving them there when they had a newborn in the house, he appreciated what Blaine had done for them. It was much more than what he had expected.

"Oh, Blaine. This is beautiful!" he said.

"Do you like it?" Blaine asked. "I also cooked dinner. I hope you're hungry."

"You cooked?" Kurt asked in surprise. It was definitely strange.

"Of course. You deserve the best" Blaine smiled and kissed him.

Kurt didn't know what was going on. He didn't see that Blaine had something more for him than just a dinner. He was too tired to think too much about it. He was simply happy to be home and enjoy the night with his family.

"Will the others come over?" Kurt asked as he sat down. His stomach still hurt but he was so hungry. He had to eat something before lying down. If they were lucky, Emily wouldn't wake up anytime soon. They could never be sure, though.

"Not tonight" Blaine said. "I wanted to be alone with you."

"That's nice" Kurt smiled. Although he loved his friends, he wanted to spend their first night without them. He was still exhausted, his wound hurt, and he still barely knew their daughter. They needed some private time.

Blaine went to get their food and lighted the candles. While he was gone, Kurt checked on Emily. She was still asleep. It was too early to say anything for sure but these first days were so easy with the baby. She slept a lot and when she wasn't asleep, she didn't cry either. She was so peaceful. And beautiful. He couldn't believe they had such a wonderful child.

Blaine joined him after a while. Everything was ready for the dinner but none of them moved. Watching their sleeping baby was far more better than any food could be, even if Blaine spent so much time preparing it. It could wait. Everything could wait.

"She's so beautiful" Kurt said.

"Just like you" Blaine replied.

Kurt smiled and reached out to stroke the baby's cheek.

"I can't take my eyes off of her" he said.

"Me neither."

Blaine grabbed Kurt's hand and pulled it to his lips to kiss it. That was the moment when Kurt noticed that Blaine was shaking.

"Is there something wrong?"

Blaine closed his eyes. He was so obvious. Although he tried to act naturally, he couldn't hide how nervous he was. It didn't help that he had no idea what to do next. Should he wait until they ate something or ask Kurt now? No, that wasn't too romantic. But he also didn't want to wait any more, not now that he had everything ready and he was pretty sure that he would just screw up everything if he waited. He knew himself way too well.

"You're so pale" Kurt frowned. "You're not going to be sick, right?"

"What? No, of course not" Blaine said quickly. His cheeks turned from pale to deep red in a blink.

"Are you sure?" Kurt asked.

"I-I have to ask you something" Blaine blurted out. Who was he kidding? He was so bad in these things.

"Okay" Kurt nodded.

"I…"

"Yes, Blaine?"

"I…"

Just ask him. It's so easy. But the words never came.

"Blaine, I'm getting worried" Kurt said slowly. The hormones were still working inside of him and he panicked. Sometimes Blaine did stupid things, he was afraid that this was one of those times.

"You have nothing to be worried about" Blaine said, trying to sound calm. He failed, of course.

"Then what's wrong?" Kurt asked, still not knowing anything.

"Iwanttomarryyou" Blaine said quickly.

Kurt frowned. He didn't understand a thing.

"I mean…" Blaine closed his eyes and tried again. "Wouldyoumarryme?"

Confusion, again.

"Blaine, could you speak a little slower…"

"I want to ask you to marry me, okay?" Blaine almost shouted, he was so nervous.

Kurt blinked in surprise but didn't say anything. Blaine couldn't blame him. He screwed up, again.

"Look" he started again. This time, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath to calm down a bit. "I love you, Kurt, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. And our child, of course. I-I think… if you feel ready… we should get married."

For an awfully long moment, Kurt was silent. Blaine was afraid that he would say no, but then he heard it.

"Yes."

Blaine opened his eyes again.

"Yes?"

"Yes, Blaine. I want to marry you, too" Kurt said.

Blaine laughed. He was so happy that Kurt said yes, that he didn't screw up after all, that everything was so perfect that he couldn't stop laughing. Kurt laughed with him, too.

"It wasn't so hard, right?" Kurt asked.

"You have no idea" Blaine sighed.

He finally remembered that he should give Kurt the ring and fished it out of his pocket. He tried to open the small box but his hands were still shaking.

"Let me help you" Kurt said. He opened the box and pulled out the small ring. It wasn't the same ring, Blaine must have bought a new one for the second proposal. One that fitted Kurt perfectly. "I love it."

He leaned close to Blaine and kissed him.

"And I love you."

"I love you, too."

They had only a second for themselves. One beautiful moment. But then the baby woke up and she was seemingly hungry.

"I guess that means that we have to continue this conversation later" Blaine sighed. "I'll make her a bottle."

"At least she didn't wake up too early" Kurt laughed.

"True" Blaine nodded. It was their life now. They would spend a lot of time with the baby who needed them so much. He didn't mind, though. One day, in the near future, he would marry Kurt Hummel. Now it was decided. And Blaine felt like he was the happiest person of the world in that moment.


	32. Chapter 32

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I'm sorry it took me so long to post this chapter. I had two possible storylines in my head and it wasn't easy to decide which one to choose. I picked the harder one, of course.:) I hope you like it!**

Blaine loved having a baby. Although Emily didn't sleep much and it made both him and Kurt tired all the time, it was absolutely worth it. The first few weeks passed quickly, they were full of fun, thanks to the lot of visits. Their friends came over almost every day, they brought food and presents for their baby. Sometimes it felt like too much, but it was hard to keep their friends away when everyone wanted to see the baby. Burt stayed for a longer time, too, although he always left after dinner to give them the privacy they needed. Blaine really liked Kurt's father. Now that they had enough time to get to know each other and they didn't fight anyone, the two of them got really close. Burt already considered Blaine as family and treated him like his own child. It was nice.

Emily was probably the most well-dressed baby girl in the whole city, thanks to Rachel and Burt who bought her everything possible. At first it bothered Blaine, he knew how much Kurt liked shopping and he was pretty sure that it would annoy his boyfr… fiancé. But Kurt seemed to be fine with it. He accepted everything they got, from baby clothes to toys, even those weird baby supplies Blaine hadn't even known existed. He was pretty sure that they wouldn't use half of them, for example the camera Burt brought one day, telling them that they should set it up in the nursery.

"Burt, I'm pretty sure we don't need a camera in the nursery" Blaine said carefully. "It's a small apartment. We'll hear her cry."

"It might be necessary" Burt replied.

Blaine thanked him for the present but he didn't change his mind. It was just weird. Even in their big house back in Ohio where Blaine had grown up, they had never used a camera in the kids' rooms. It was just too much. Emily was too small to do anything without them noticing it, and later she would need privacy, too, something they had to give her as good parents. But it was something they didn't have to worry about for a very long time. It was the far future, something that didn't bother Blaine, at least not now.

In his happy state, Blaine didn't realize that something wasn't right. They always had visitors and barely had time to be alone with his family. It wasn't too obvious either. So he thought that everything was fine. It only started to change when Emily was almost one month old. Burt had already returned to Ohio and their friends had to go back to their lives as well. They couldn't spend as much time with them as before, so it was just the three of them most of the time. Well, when Blaine was home, of course. He still had to work, harder than before, if he wanted to give his family everything they needed.

He blamed himself for not noticing it earlier. He blamed himself for leaving work too late, that he was too tired to wake up to Emily in the middle of the night, that he didn't have enough energy to help Kurt more when he was home. He did everything he could, of course, but it wasn't enough.

One day Blaine got home later than usual. He had so much work to do and he was running out of time. He had to finish an important project and although he wanted to be with his family and bath his daughter like every other day, he had to stay. His job was important, more important than ever since they needed money, so he only texted Kurt to tall him that he would be late and did his best to finish work fast. He was too busy to notice that Kurt never texted him back.

When Blaine got home that evening, he found Kurt sitting in the living room, rocking their crying daughter. He looked up when he heard Blaine come in, but only shook his head and looked back down at Emily. He started humming but it didn't seem like it helped.

"Hey" Blaine greeted him. "Is everything alright?"

Kurt didn't answer.

"Kurt?"

"Just leave me alone" Kurt told him.

Blaine had no idea what was wrong with him. Usually he tried to be patient with Kurt but now he was too tired to play this game.

"I'll help you bath her" he said and walked to the bathroom's door. He had to wash his hands before doing anything. When he returned a few seconds later and reached out towards Kurt to take the baby from him, Kurt pulled away. "What are you doing?"

"It's already done" Kurt told him. He kept his voice low but his eyes told Blaine that he was angry.

"Well, thanks. Then I could take her to her bed…"

Kurt sighed and stood up, the baby still in his arms. He started pacing in front of the couch, rocking the baby in his arms.

"Where have you been?" he asked after a while.

"At work" Blaine answered. "I texted you. I have so much work, I had to stay in there longer. And I guess I have to stay tomorrow, too."

Kurt shook his head again and turned away from him.

"What's wrong?" Blaine asked.

"Nothing" Kurt said.

"Kurt, I can see that something is bothering you…"

"It's not like you care" Kurt told him.

Blaine pressed his lips together and did his best not to hurt the other man. It was hard. He was constantly tired, he was hungry, and he didn't need a fight with Kurt. It didn't even make any sense. He had been working. He hadn't done anything wrong.

"Look, Kurt, you know how much I have to work…"

"Do you know how much I work at home when you aren't here?" Kurt shouted back.

Blaine had no idea what to say. They had talked about this before the birth of their baby. Kurt had volunteered to stay home with Emily since he could do his job from home and also because he wanted to stay. And it wasn't like he had too much to do. They usually ordered dinner, most of the housework was done by machines, so...

"Not really" Blaine said in the end.

That was a mistake. He could see how angry Kurt was and he wished he could take it back. But it was already late.

"Sure. Because you don't think that taking care of a baby is hard work" Kurt spat.

"I never said that…"

"Yes, you did! But you have no idea what I'm going through every single day because you're never here! You have no idea how hard it is!" Kurt shouted.

And then he was gone. Blaine watched as he walked to the nursery with Emily and slammed the door closed. Blaine blinked in surprise. Sure, Kurt had been frustrated lately but he hadn't thrown such a tantrum before. It was new.

Blaine didn't do anything that night, choosing to stay away from Kurt until he calmed down. He told himself that it was just the lack of sleep that made Kurt moody and thought that giving him some time to calm down was the best he could do.

Things didn't get better, though.

Blaine needed a few more days to realize that something was very wrong. He tried to go home earlier to help Kurt, he also woke up to Emily several times, so Kurt could sleep. He did his best to help his fiancé with the baby, so Kurt could have some time for himself. He talked to Kurt's friends and asked them to spend some time with him, preferably outside of the apartment, away from the baby. Blaine tried to imagine what it was like, being with nobody but a baby all the time, going through the same routine every single day. It was surely frustrating. Kurt just wasn't the type who stayed home all the time. He loved being outside, talking to people, living freely. Blaine thought that a day off would help him feel better.

Only Kurt didn't seem to appreciate his efforts. He didn't go anywhere with his friends, telling them that he was busy with the baby, that he didn't have anything to wear because he was still fat after giving birth, and several other excuses, none of them true. He stayed home instead and gave Blaine a hard time when he was home. Whatever he did, it was never good enough for Kurt, either it was about feeding the baby or making housework. Nothing was good enough for Kurt.

Blaine was close to telling Kurt that it was enough, that he couldn't take anymore and they should call off the wedding because he didn't want to fight with him all the time. He didn't want such a future for their child. He gave his best but Kurt didn't even seem to realize how much he did for his family. Luckily, he shared his feelings with his friends and they came up with a surprising explanation.

"Isn't it postpartum depression?" Wes offered. "Does he have other symptoms?"

Blaine had no idea what he was talking about. He had read a lot about babies but nothing about how a child's arrival might affect parents.

"I think he's just tired" he said.

"You should keep an eye on him" Jeff said. "My cousin had PPD after her son's birth. Believe me, it wasn't nice. If Kurt has problems, you have to help him. He can't deal with it on his own."

"You have to take it seriously" Wes nodded in agreement.

So Blaine made a research on PPD and decided to take better care of Kurt. Or at least try. It was so hard with his fiancé. He rarely accepted help and it was really hard to talk to him.

Blaine decided to keep his worries to himself until he figured out what was going on. He watched Kurt all the time, searching for symptoms. It was one thing that Kurt barely slept and he was frustrated all the time. It was something new parents had to get over all the time. But Kurt wasn't only tired as Blaine figured out when he decided to take a few days off to stay with his family. Kurt was always pale, it wasn't new, but as Blaine paid more attention, he noticed that Kurt lost some weight. It hadn't seemed wrong at first. Kurt had always talked about getting back his shape as soon as possible after giving birth. But it wasn't because he ate healthily and worked out when their baby was asleep. No. Kurt simply didn't eat. Maybe a few bites here or there but that was all.

"I made cookies" Blaine said on his first day off as he left the kitchen to find Kurt. He knew how much Kurt loved those chocolate chip cookies, so he decided to try them at home. Maybe they weren't perfect, it was the first time he tried after all, but they smelled great. "Why don't we eat some and watch a movie while Emily sleeps?"

He found Kurt sitting on the couch with his knees pulled up to his chest.

"I'm not hungry" Kurt told him. "I would like to lie down a bit. I didn't have much sleep last night."

"Of course" Blaine nodded. "Go ahead. I'll take care of everything."

But Kurt didn't sleep. He went back to their room but when Emily woke up and started crying, he was back in no time, looking more tired than before.

When Blaine woke up that night, he needed about a minute to realize what was going on. At first he thought that it was Emily crying, so he groaned and pushed himself up from the bed. That was when he noticed that Kurt wasn't beside him. He rubbed his tired eyes and made his way to the nursery. Kurt was sitting there in the rocking chair with the baby in his arms. Emily was awake but she was perfectly still, watching her father with wide eyes. Blaine finally realized that the sound he heard was coming from Kurt. He was crying.

"What's wrong?" Blaine asked as he knelt down beside him.

"Why isn't she sleeping?" Kurt cried.

"She might be hungry" Blaine offered.

"I fed her. I changed her diaper" Kurt cried. He tightened his arms around Emily and started rocking her again. "Come on. Sleep. Please."

"I'll do this. Go back and try to sleep" Blaine told him gently.

"I'm a horrible father" Kurt said.

"Why do you say that?" Blaine frowned.

"I have no idea what I'm doing" Kurt cried. "See? I can't even figure out what she needs."

"Honey, I think you should sleep" Blaine said. "Let me take care of this."

"I don't need help!" Kurt shouted suddenly.

He must have scared the baby because Emily started crying within seconds.

"No, please, don't do this to me" Kurt said.

"Let me help you" Blaine said gently. "I know that you're tired and it's completely understandable. But you're not alone. Go back to sleep, Kurt. Emily will be fine with me."

Kurt finally nodded and let Blaine take the baby from him. He wiped his face and stood up. Blaine had to reach out with one hand and grab his elbow because Kurt's legs were shaking. He seemed like he was ready to pass out. Blaine watched in worry as Kurt disappeared from his sight. He was seriously worried about him. Maybe it was just exhaustion that made him so frustrated but Kurt wasn't well, that was sure. And Blaine had to do something about it.

At first he decided to take over every work at home. He stayed with Emily for the night, so Kurt could sleep, then made them breakfast. He only went to wake up Kurt when he was done with everything. The man was lying in the bed but he was awake. Blaine frowned as he looked at him. Kurt didn't seem like he had too much sleep that night.

"Honey, are you sick?" Blaine asked carefully. "Should we go to the doctor? Because I can call Finn…"

"I'm fine" Kurt said quietly. "Just tired."

"Why don't you eat something and then go back to sleep? I'm not going anywhere. You can sleep as much as you want."

"I'm not hungry" Kurt replied.

Blaine took a deep breath and sat down beside him. He took Kurt's hand that was closest to him and squeezed it. He hoped that Kurt wouldn't be angry again. They had to talk.

"Kurt, I can't not see that something is wrong" Blaine started. "You barely sleep. You barely eat. You'll destroy yourself with this."

"I'm fine" Kurt said weakly.

"No, you aren't" Blaine shook his head.

"I'm just tired" Kurt said. "I think I need some rest, that's all."

Blaine let it go then. He believed Kurt, that he was just overreacting and all Kurt needed was a good sleep and some food. So he let him rest some more and went back to take care of the household. He fed Emily, changed her clothes and then took a long walk with her in the park. On their way home, they bought food in Kurt's favorite place and took it home.

Kurt was still in bed, awake. He didn't look any better. He must have heard them but didn't leave bed. Now that was strange. Maybe he was going to be sick.

"We brought you pasta" Blaine told him as he stepped into the room. "Will you join us?"

"I'm not feeling well" Kurt told him.

"I think you're going to be sick" Blaine said. He was somewhat relieved. Maybe he had seen things wrong. Kurt was only tired and sick, that was why he had been acting strangely in the previous few days.

"Maybe" Kurt nodded.

"You still have to eat something" Blaine said.

"I'm fine. I'll feed Emily and then sleep some more" Kurt said.

"I don't think you should go near her if you're sick" Blaine said uncertainly.

He only wanted the best but Kurt didn't seem to understand it. He took a deep, shaky breath and started crying.

"Oh, no, please, don't cry" Blaine said desperately.

"So you think I'm a horrible father" Kurt said.

"What? No!" Blaine said quickly. "Of course not, Kurt! I just want to help you."

"Why do you say that over and over again?" Kurt asked. "I don't need help. I'm fine!"

"I don't think you are" Blaine said.

"Well, you're wrong" Kurt said. "I can take care of the baby. I don't need you to be around all the time and tell me what I'm doing wrong."

"I didn't say that!"

"But you don't trust me! I can see it in your eyes!"

Blaine blinked in surprise. He didn't think that Kurt was a bad parent, not at all. He loved Emily and did his best to take care of her. He had no idea why Kurt had such thoughts. Unless…

He sighed and decided to leave Kurt alone for a while. Whatever he said, it wouldn't help. Kurt was too…

Depressed.

Blaine sighed again as he walked back to Emily, deep in his thoughts. He didn't want to panic too early but he also couldn't ignore the problem anymore. It seemingly didn't help that he was more home. Maybe it would, with time, but if he was wrong, something bad might happen to Kurt. So he decided that it was time to ask for help.

There was only one person he could think about. Somebody who had to see this several times, who knew what they had to do now. So he reached for his phone and dialed Sebastian's number.


	33. Chapter 33

**Hi Everyone!** **  
** **Here is the new chapter, I hope you like it.** **  
** **Thank you so much for reading this story, and thank you for your wonderful reviews!** **I'm doing my best to write things correctly.**

By the time Blaine arrived to Sebastian, he was completely in panic. After talking to the man, they decided to meet, so Blaine could tell Sebastian what was going on. Sebastian was a doctor after all, he probably knew what to do. Unfortunately, on his way to the hospital, Blaine had time to look up mental health disorders following childbirth. It was a very bad idea. PPD was just the top of the iceberg. There were other, a lot worse options, usually treated in hospital with strong medication. So Blaine had a very good reason to panic. That was something he had never expected to happen to them. Kurt was such a strong man and he had been waiting for their child, he had been so happy… Seeing him having trouble hurt so much. But Blaine believed that Sebastian could help them. That they would find a solution together and they would help Kurt through this.

He was somewhat worried of leaving Kurt with Emily. Kurt didn't show any sign that he might hurt their baby but Blaine wasn't calm at all. After all, there was a possibility that Kurt had thoughts like hurting himself or the baby. He could never be sure. So he had to be quick. Maybe he could convince Sebastian to come over and see Kurt. Yeah, that was the best they could do. Having a doctor around would surely solve everything.

"Hey, Blaine" Sebastian said when he opened the door for the man. Blaine didn't greet him, he simply stepped inside. "Somebody is in rush."

"I am" Blaine said. "I need your help."

"You already told me that on the phone" Sebastian nodded.

"Kurt's in huge trouble" Blaine said in worry.

"What's wrong?" Sebastian frowned. "I saw his cut last week, it was fine."

"I know. It's not about that" Blaine said. Although Kurt looked horrible, at least he was healing. He was fine, physically. Well, mostly.

"Then what's wrong?" Sebastian asked on confusion.

"I think he has PPD" Blaine said. "Or worse. I don't know. But something is very wrong with him and I think he needs help."

"Why do you think he has PPD?" Sebastian asked.

"Because I made a research and he has almost all the symptoms" Blaine explained. "He barely sleeps, he barely eats…"

"Oh, please, don't say you read two articles and now you're panicking because some things you read there are true" Sebastian sighed.

"But they are!" Blaine said. "Have I mentioned that it can be post-partum psychosis? That's a lot worse. We seriously have to do something about it."

He quickly told Sebastian everything Kurt had done in the previous days. Down to the smallest details. Maybe Sebastian would finally believe him and offer help. He was a doctor, he surely had friends. They needed the best they could have.

"Although I'm sure Kurt would appreciate your worry, I think you should calm down at first" Sebastian said calmly. Why was he so calm?

"What do you mean? What if he hurts himself? Or Emily?" Blaine asked.

"I don't think you have to worry about that" Sebastian said. "How much does he sleep?"

"I don't know" Blaine said uncertainly. "Not much?"

"The first few months with a newborn are always hard" Sebastian explained. "Parents often aren't prepared for the changes a baby brings. Yes, that means a lot of trouble and little sleep. If you add the hormonal changes to that, it's not surprising that new parents have often problems."

"So you say I shouldn't worry at all?" Blaine asked with a raised eyebrow. He couldn't believe that Sebastian was so careless. He was Kurt's friend!

"That's not what I'm saying" Sebastian answered. "New mothers are often alone with their problems because people don't take the symptoms seriously. I'm glad you care about him and keep your eyes open, but we have to be careful with what we do. Kurt might be really sensitive. Telling him that he's sick right away is a bad idea."

"Will you help me?" Blaine asked.

"I will, but you have to calm down and let me ask the questions" Sebastian said. "I have to see him before we jump to the wrong conclusion. Okay?"

"Okay" Blaine said quietly. He wanted to believe Sebastian, trust him that he could make everything better, but he couldn't not worry. It was about his family after all.

~ o ~

Sebastian wasn't in rush for sure. They agreed that Blaine would return home and help Kurt around the baby and Sebastian would come over a little later, so Kurt wouldn't figure out that the two of them had had a talk. Blaine had thought that it would happen sooner but they waited more than an hour and Sebastian still wasn't there. He started to get nervous.

"Is there something wrong?" Kurt asked.

Blaine blinked in surprise. Kurt usually didn't talk to him, unless it was about something he did wrong. Maybe Sebastian was right and he only needed time and rest.

"No. Of course not" Blaine said with a forced smile.

"You seem nervous" Kurt pointed out.

"Really?" Blaine asked innocently.

"Is there something wrong?" Kurt asked again.

"Of course not" Blaine said again. Knowing that he was a terrible liar, he tried to change topic. "Are you still tired?"

"Yeah" Kurt said. "I don't sleep too well."

"I know" Blaine nodded. "If you want to lie down a bit…"

"I don't think I can fall asleep but thanks" Kurt said.

"You shouldn't do this to yourself" Blaine said gently. He was afraid that Kurt might start yelling again but it looked like he was in a better mood this time.

"Blaine, I'm not doing this because I want it. I really can't fall asleep" Kurt explained. "I guess I'm too tired to sleep. Is that possible?"

"I don't know. Is it?" Blaine asked back. He was still surprised that Kurt talked to him after days of fighting. Did he know that Blaine had gone to Sebastian? Was this just a trick to make Blaine believe that everything was fine? Because he wouldn't believe it so easily.

The doorbell finally rang, telling them that Sebastian arrived. Blaine jumped up before Kurt could make a move and rushed to the door.

"Finally!" he hissed as he let Sebastian in. "Where have you been?"

"Do you want Kurt to find out what's going on?" Sebastian whispered back. "Because that certainly won't do us any good."

He stepped away from Blaine just in time, so Kurt couldn't see them whispering to each other. He was still sitting on the couch but he moved closer to the edge to see who Blaine was talking to. He offered Sebastian a weak smile as the man stepped inside.

"Sebastian! What are you doing here?" he asked.

"Came to say hi" Sebastian said. "I also remembered that I didn't get you or Emily a present, so I thought it was time to visit you."

"You shouldn't have bought anything, really" Kurt said.

"Come on, I know how much you love presents" Sebastian said and placed the box he was holding in his hands onto the table. "Open it."

He was acting so naturally, Blaine almost believed that it was all innocent. Kurt surely didn't see that it was more than a friendly visit. He reached for the box, opened it and pulled out the baby clothes Sebastian had bought for Emily.

"They are beautiful. Thank you" Kurt said and put the clothes back into the box.

"That's all? Come on, Kurt, you love clothes" Sebastian said.

"What am I supposed to do?" Kurt asked in confusion.

"Well, I thought you would be more excited" Sebastian shrugged. "You might be exhausted. Having a newborn is surely hard."

"Yeah" Kurt said weakly.

"Do you sleep enough? You seem tired" Sebastian asked.

Blaine kept his eyes on him. He wasn't sure if Sebastian would be careful enough. What if Kurt figured out what was going on? He would be angry for sure…

Luckily, Kurt didn't seem to notice anything. Blaine sighed in relief.

"Not really. The baby keeps me awake all the time" Kurt admitted.

"I thought she slept enough" Sebastian said.

"Not always" Kurt replied.

"Sometimes she sleeps through the night, sometimes she wakes up in every hour" Blaine added.

"It must be hard" Sebastian said.

"It is" Kurt admitted.

"And the problem is, Kurt can't go back to sleep too easily" Blaine said, unable to stop himself. "He's awake all the time."

"Why don't you help him?" Sebastian asked as he turned to Blaine.

"Well, I…"

"It's fine" Kurt shrugged. "Emily is my responsibility. That's why I'm home after all."

"It doesn't mean you should destroy yourself" Sebastian said honestly.

"I'm fine" Kurt said.

"Accepting help is not a bad thing" Sebastian said. Blaine was afraid of how Kurt would take the news of visiting a doctor but he soon figured out that Sebastian wasn't talking about that. "Raising a kid is a hard job and a lot of parents make the mistake of giving up everything for their children. But you shouldn't do that. You have your family, your friends and believe me, we're more than happy to help you if you need a few hours for yourself. To drink a coffee, take a walk or something."

"Thanks but I really don't need help" Kurt said. "It's fine. I don't want to go anywhere."

"Why not?" Sebastian continued. "Look, the weather is beautiful. Why don't we take a walk? I'll buy you a coffee."

"I'm not in the mood" Kurt said. "Maybe next time."

"Oh, come on, just a short walk" Sebastian said. "Blaine will stay with Emily."

"I-I don't think I should leave her alone" Kurt said uncertainly.

"Why not? She'll be with her father" Sebastian said. "Come on, let's get dressed! I'm dying for a coffee."

"I…"

"Just half an hour" Sebastian said quickly. He didn't give Kurt any chance to protest.

Unfortunately, Emily chose that moment to wake up. Just as she started crying, Kurt was already on his way to the nursery as if he was running away from Sebastian.

"What the hell was that?" Blaine asked the moment Kurt left the room.

"It's too early to say anything for sure" Sebastian answered.

"That's not what I mean" Blaine said. "I thought you would be more careful."

"I have no idea what your problem is" Sebastian said. "The weather is beautiful today, don't you think?"

"What do you want with this?" Blaine frowned.

"I think Emily needs fresh air. Go get her" Sebastian said.

Blaine had no idea what Sebastian was talking about. It didn't make any sense. Sebastian must have seen his confusion because he sighed and shook his head.

"It must be really hard for him to talk about his feelings. I don't think you should be around when we talk" Sebastian explained.

"Excuse me?" Blaine almost shouted. "I'm his fiancé!"

"That's why you shouldn't be around" Sebastian said, losing his patience. He thought that Blaine knew a thing or two about Kurt. "Look, this can be really hard to deal with. I don't think he would admit that he has trouble when his family is here to hear it. Kurt's simply not like that. Do you understand?"

Blaine tried not to be hurt and understand Sebastian. He could have been right. He had tried to talk to Kurt after all but it hadn't helped. Maybe he would open up to Sebastian. They had nothing to lose.

"Okay" he said in the end. "We'll leave you alone for a while. But be careful. Please."

"Of course" Sebastian nodded. He didn't want to hurt Kurt. He was his friend and only wanted to help him.

Convincing Kurt that Blaine would be able to take care of Emily for a while was hard. Kurt didn't think that the baby should leave the apartment and when Blaine told him that they would go out for a while, Kurt seemed close to panic. Blaine didn't understand it, he didn't understand anything anymore, but he believed that it would get better if Sebastian talked to Kurt, so he did his best to reassure Kurt that everything would be fine.

"She'll love the park" Blaine smiled. "Don't worry so much. I'm happy to spend some time alone with her."

"What if she gets sick?" Kurt worried.

"She won't" Blaine answered. "Hey, relax. You deserve some time off. You must be exhausted. Just take a deep breath and calm down a bit, please. Nothing will happen to Emily."

"If she starts crying…"

"I'll take care of that" Blaine said quickly.

"But..."

"We won't be away for too long" Blaine said. "Besides, I have a feeling that she'll have a good sleep outside."

"But if she doesn't like it…"

"We'll come home" Blaine interrupted. Kurt worried way too much, it wasn't good for him. "Relax. Enjoy your free time as long as you can."

It was hard not to talk about how worried about Kurt he was. But Blaine stayed strong, he smiled and acted like nothing bothered him. He took the bag from Kurt and pushed the stroller forward towards the door.

"You'll love the park" Blaine told Emily. "Papa and I go there quite often. It's beautiful."

Blaine walked out of the room as fast as he could, talking to the baby. Kurt watched them until they disappeared from his sight, nervously chewing on his lower lip. When they couldn't hear the others anymore, Sebastian walked to the door and closed it.

"Why don't you sit down?" he said gently. "Would you like a tea?"

"No, thanks" Kurt said.

"Aren't you hungry? Because I could do something for you…"

"You're way too friendly today" Kurt pointed out. "What's going on?"

Sebastian smiled. Maybe Kurt's problem wasn't that bad. He didn't want to jump to the conclusion too fast, though. He agreed with Blaine, something was wrong and he wanted to figure out how serious it was.

"Sit down. I want to talk to you" Sebastian said. There was no reason to lie to Kurt. His friend knew him too well, he would figure out what he wanted sooner or later.

Kurt sighed and walked back to the couch. He could sense that the others were worried for some reason, deep inside he also knew what it was about, he simply didn't want to admit that it was because of him. Sometimes he knew that his behavior was far from perfect, maybe he was a little too sensitive and worried too much, but he wouldn't admit to himself that it was wrong. That he was wrong.

"Whatever it is, you don't have to worry" Kurt said quietly.

Sebastian smiled. So Kurt knew that something was wrong. It was a start.

"Kurt, I asked Blaine to leave, so we can talk without anyone disturbing us" Sebastian explained. Honesty was very important. If Kurt trusted him, they would get somewhere. "I couldn't not notice that you've been acting differently since Emily's birth."

"Blaine asked for your help" Kurt rolled his eyes. Of course it was Blaine. Who else could come up with such a stupid plan?

"He didn't have to. You don't even answer my calls anymore" Sebastian pointed out.

"I'm busy" Kurt said.

"Is that so?" Sebastian asked with a raised eyebrow.

"What do you want, Sebastian?" Kurt asked in frustration. He started to feel uncomfortable and didn't want to talk to Sebastian anymore. Telling him to leave would be rude, though. Not to mention that Blaine would ask questions he didn't want to answer. It seemed like he was forced to this conversation and there was no way out of it.

"Nothing" Sebastian shrugged. He made himself comfortable on the couch as if they were talking about some light topic. It didn't make Kurt relax, though.

"I don't understand" Kurt said. He was confused.

"I don't want anything from you" Sebastian said. "But we have about an hour for ourselves if we can trust Blaine with the baby for so long, so I thought that maybe you wanted to talk."

"About what?" Kurt asked back.

"Anything" Sebastian said. "Come on, Kurt. You hate staying at home. Isn't it frustrating that you have nobody to talk to?"

"I have Emily" Kurt said, looking away.

"And that makes you happy?" Sebastian asked. Kurt wouldn't be able to lie to him forever. He had to ask the right questions and he would open up to him. Or so he believed.

"Look, I'm really tired. Could we continue this conversation later…"

"Kurt, look at me" Sebastian said quietly.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Kurt asked, his voice shaking. Suddenly he felt like he could start crying in any moment… No, he was already crying. Why was he crying again?

"Hey, it's okay" Sebastian said and quickly wrapped his arms around Kurt. "It's okay."

"What's wrong with me?" Kurt cried.

"Nothing is wrong with you" Sebastian said without hesitation. That was right. He knew very well what women usually thought about themselves in such a situation. Failure. That they did something wrong. Hell, not just women, it affected men as well. He saw that way too many times. Having a baby was a challenge for both parents. It was so damn hard. But people still found it hard to talk about their feelings when parenthood didn't turn out to be sweet and easy as in the commercials.

"I-I'm trying so hard to be a good father" Kurt said. He had no idea what was going on. He had suppressed these feelings for a long while, knowing how wrong it was not to feel perfectly. He wanted this after all. He should have been happy. "I want to give her everything she needs. And Blaine, too. But-but…"

"How are you feeling?" Sebastian asked.

"I don't know" Kurt said uncertainly. "I just… I'm tired. I'm so tired that I don't want to get out of bed at all."

"That's understandable" Sebastian nodded.

"Is it how it's supposed to be?" Kurt asked. "I was so happy when Emily was born. But now… Sometimes I have these horrible thoughts."

"What kind of thoughts?" Sebastian asked carefully. He was scared of the answer. If Kurt was having thoughts about hurting himself or the baby, they were in trouble.

"That I'm not good enough for them" Kurt said.

"Kurt, do you have thoughts about hurting yourself?" Sebastian asked slowly. "Please, be honest with me. This is important."

"What? No, of course not" Kurt frowned. "Why would I hurt myself? This is crazy. What about my family?"

Sebastian almost smiled. It was a relief that Kurt wasn't lost too deep. They could get him back from there. They could help him. But the most important, Kurt had to help himself. He had to be strong to get over this, it wouldn't work without him.

"Listen to me" Sebastian said. "You might feel ashamed. You might think that you're doing something wrong, but you have to trust me. You are an amazing father and we're so proud of you. I know from Blaine how hard you work to give them everything they need. You're amazing and your family loves you so much."

"How do you know?" Kurt asked.

"Because Blaine told me" Sebastian smiled. "But you're right, something is wrong. Not with you. You did nothing wrong, okay? It's just… Sometimes it's too much. Being home with a baby all day, having no one to talk to, not sleeping enough. It's a lot to take in. And I think you should talk about it."

After a moment of hesitation, Sebastian decided to skip a few details and get straight to the point. They could talk about this later when Kurt was feeling better.

"I have a good friend who knows a lot about the difficulties you're going through right now. I'll talk to her and ask for an appointment."

"Appointment? Is she a doctor?" Kurt asked with wide eyes.

"A therapist" Sebastian said carefully. "She works with new parents and help them get through the problems they have after the birth of their children."

"You think I'm crazy?" Kurt asked. He was close to tears again.

"No, but I'm afraid that you won't get better without help" Sebastian said. He decided to leave Blaine out of this in case Kurt get angry. He needed someone to trust, more than ever. "As I said, you shouldn't feel ashamed. It's quite natural not to feel well, actually. A lot of parents go through this. I think a few sessions would help. You can talk to her without fear, she understands what you're going through."

"What about you? You're a doctor. You can surely help me…"

"I will" Sebastian said. "You can call me whenever you want. You can tell me everything. And I'll come over a lot more often to help you. Or babysit Emily or whatever you need. And you can trust Blaine as well. Don't forget that he loves you."

"What if he'll be disappointed?" Kurt asked.

"Blaine?" Sebastian smiled. "Never. That guy is crazily in love with you."

It was something Kurt knew, of course. He wasn't sure in himself anymore but he trusted Blaine. He knew that he loved him unconditionally. He also wanted to make himself believe that Blaine would never leave him, even if those crazy thoughts in his head told otherwise. He wanted to make them disappear. He wanted to feel better. Maybe Sebastian was right and that woman he knew would be the solution. He still wasn't sure if he wanted to talk to a stranger when it was hard to talk to his loved ones but he decided to think about it. Maybe it would help him clear his head a bit because it was full of worrisome thoughts right now. He needed peace. He wasn't sure if he was able to live like this much longer.


	34. Chapter 34

**Hi Everyone!**

 **First of all, I would like to thank you for reading and reviewing my story! Also, thank you for sharing your own experiences with me. I know this is a difficult topic and women find it so hard to talk about.**

 **I hope you like the new chapter. Please feel free to let me know your thoughts about it.**

Kurt gave himself a lot of time to think. He believed that it was only Sebastian who knew about his problems and since ha had made him promise that he wouldn't tell Blaine, Kurt felt somewhat safer. Although Sebastian tried to convince him that he could trust Blaine, that the man would understand him and help him through the difficulties, Kurt wasn't so sure. He felt ashamed. He knew that his family needed him more than ever, so admitting that he had trouble, that he had failed after wanting this baby so much was hard. It had been his idea to have a child after all. Blaine had been forced into this situation, even if he said that it was the best thing that could have happened to him. It was just not right. Kurt had thought that he had been born to be father, he had imagined having a child so many times, he had truly believed that he would become an amazing father, just like his own dad. But he couldn't have been farther from that.

After his talk with Sebastian, Kurt was determined to get better. He understood that he had a problem and he had to do something to make everything better. He had to get better. Because he was sick. It was hard to deal with. He had read about people having trouble after giving birth to their children, but admitting that he was one of them wasn't so easy. He wanted to believe that it was just a small thing and he would be able to get over it with time.

He didn't talk to Blaine for a good while. He tried to become a better parent and partner on his own. He tried to force himself to get up from bed when he didn't feel like he was able to do so, he tried to take care of everything around the baby and also spend more time with Blaine. It was harder than he had first thought. At night, when he sneaked out to Emily when she woke up, he held her in his arms, silently crying, and he decided to make some big changes. He decided that he had to be stronger and he was able to get better alone. He also decided to start working on his problems the next day. But then the morning came, he was left alone with the baby, and he found practically impossible to do anything. He was simply too tired. The day passed away so quickly, he only realized that he barely left the bed when Blaine came home from work. He wasn't ready with the dinner. How could he, they had nothing in the fridge. He should have done the grocery shopping as he had promised to do. Only he didn't feel ready to leave the apartment. Blaine didn't say anything bad, he told Kurt that they would order something and he would do the shopping the next day on his way home.

It only made Kurt cry again.

"Honey, what's wrong?" Blaine asked in concern.

"Nothing" Kurt said.

"Kurt, you're crying" Blaine pointed out. "Did I say something wrong?"

"No" Kurt shook his head.

Blaine was worried, it was easy to tell. Of course he was. He probably thought that Kurt wasn't good enough to take care of their child. Maybe Blaine knew the truth, too. He might have seen that something wasn't right with him, just like Sebastian, and it was only the matter of time that he gave up. He surely wouldn't stay together with someone who couldn't even cook a simple meal and clean up a bit while Blaine was working. Kurt must have seemed lazy and it was completely unacceptable. Blaine deserved so much better.

"I can come home earlier tomorrow" Blaine offered. "We could take a walk in the park, all the three of us. What do you think?"

Kurt remembered the last time Blaine had gone out with Emily and the thought made him cry harder. He didn't know why but the thought of bringing their daughter out there was just so saddening.

"Kurt, I'm seriously worried about you" Blaine said honestly. He had talked to Sebastian about Kurt's condition and they had agreed to give Kurt some time to think about what Sebastian had offered him. Sebastian thought that it would be easier for Kurt to get over this hard time if he understood that he needed help and didn't think that he was forced to visit the therapist. So Blaine had waited but things only seemed to get worse and it made him extremely worried about his fiancé. "You're so sad. Please tell me how I can help you. I really want to see you smile again."

He tried to be careful with his words but it wasn't easy. Blaine knew very well that Kurt had problems, he was struggling with the simplest things and it was so hard to see him like this. Kurt was such a strong person. But now he needed help. And Blaine help him no matter what.

"Please, talk to me" Blaine said gently. "I know that you have problems but I know you can get through them. We can do it together."

He reached out and grabbed Kurt's hand.

"Please, let me help you" he said.

Blaine thought that Kurt would finally talk about his feelings but his words only made everything worse. Kurt was panicking. It wasn't like he hadn't tried to talk to Blaine but he had always convinced himself that it was better to keep his feelings to himself. He had told Sebastian everything, because he wasn't scared that he might lose his friend. But Blaine was different. Blaine and Emily meant the world to him, if he lost any of them, he would die for sure. He didn't realize that his thoughts were irrational, he didn't see how loving Blaine was, he only knew that something was very wrong with him and if he didn't do anything about it, fast, he would lose the man he loved. Only it wasn't so simple. Blaine already knew that he had problems. That he was sick. Kurt didn't want to know what Blaine thought about him. He should have been happy, he finally had the child he had wanted so much, he had everything he needed and still… Blaine was surely disappointed in him.

"I'm so sorry" Kurt whispered.

"Why, honey?" Blaine asked in confusion.

"You deserve so much better" Kurt said.

"How can you say that?" Blaine asked. Kurt was everything he had ever wanted, he was perfect for him. He didn't want to be with somebody else, ever. He had the perfect family after all. He only had to make Kurt see that.

"You must think that I'm lazy" Kurt cried. "I-I really want to do all the housework, I…"

"Kurt, you take care of our daughter. It's a really serious job" Blaine interrupted. "and you're doing perfectly. You're the most amazing father I've ever met. I'm so proud of you."

"I do everything wrong" Kurt cried. "See? I didn't even cook dinner…"

"Kurt, I don't care about dinner. I only want to see you happy" Blaine said.

"I'm not happy" Kurt muttered.

"I know" Blaine sighed.

"You must be so disappointed in me…"

"I'm not" Blaine said without hesitation. "I'm just sad to see you struggling. I want to help you get better so badly, but I don't know what to do. Please, talk to me. Tell me what you need and I'll do everything in my power to give it to you. You're not alone."

Kurt still wasn't sure if he could trust Blaine to tell him the truth, but he seemed so honest and Kurt really needed his support. He had tried to get better but it wasn't so easy. He needed help. He needed Blaine to help him.

"I-I want to get better" Kurt said. "I just don't know what to do."

"We'll figure out together" Blaine said. He hesitated for a moment but then decided that it was time to talk about the therapist. Kurt definitely needed help from someone who knew what exactly they had to do. "Maybe we could find professional help. You know, someone who knows what it is like. Someone who can give you advice."

"I talked to Sebastian the last time he was here" Kurt said quietly. "He… He thinks that I should visit a therapist. He knows someone who might be able to help me."

"That's wonderful" Blaine smiled. "We should call her tomorrow, what do you think?"

"I…"

"Nobody has to know" Blaine said quickly, feeling that Kurt's biggest was that his friends would judge him. "I'm sure that Rachel and Finn would be happy to stay with Emily, so I could go with you. And we could come up with an easy explanation. Like we want to spend some time alone. They don't have to know the truth. Although I think we can trust them. They're family after all."

Maybe Blaine wasn't comfortable around all of Kurt's friends, he knew that they loved Kurt and they would surely help him. But it was Kurt's decision to make. If he didn't want to tell them the truth, Blaine would respect his choice.

"Maybe we should tell Finn. And Dad" Kurt said.

"I'm sure they'll be happy to help" Blaine nodded.

"So you'll come with me?" Kurt asked. He finally looked up at Blaine. He was still scared of the future but Blaine could see hope in his eyes as well. It was a start.

"Of course" Blaine squeezed his hand. "I'll always be there for you."

~ o ~

Blaine wasn't sure which one of them was more nervous. It was the day of Kurt's first appointment. He had gotten home earlier from work, so he could spend some time with Kurt and Emily before Rachel and Finn arrived. They had had a long conversation with the two of them only two days earlier. It had been really hard, especially for Kurt who found talking about his problems uncomfortable. He still believed that people would judge him and he was afraid of how his friends would look at him. His fear was pointless, though. Rachel seemed to be so understanding. Finn didn't seem like he knew what exactly was going on, but he understood that Kurt needed help and as his stepbrother, he was willing to do anything to help Kurt get better. They had also called Burt and Kurt had had a long and serious talk. Kurt was afraid of his father's reaction, he was shaking so badly that Blaine was afraid that he might have a panic attack. Luckily, Burt knew what to say to help him calm down. Within seconds, Kurt looked relaxed and he was willing to talk some about his fears. Burt told him that the therapist was a good idea and how proud of Kurt he was. Burt also promised to call them every day and that he would come to visit as soon as possible. So when the day of the first session came, Kurt seemed ready and determined to get better.

Only he had trouble leaving the apartment. First there was his fear of leaving Emily behind. He had made a list for Rachel and Finn and then told them everything at least twice, making them promise that they would call him if anything happened. When they finally convinced him that Emily would be alright, there was the other problem: he had to go outside. It was the first time Blaine realized how the easiest things could be complicated.

They were just standing there, ready to go, right in front of the door. Kurt hesitated. Blaine tried to find out what he should say. That everything would be alright? Was it enough? He knew that he had to be careful with his words.

"Are you ready?" he asked quietly.

"Sure. I just…" Kurt reached for the handle but then he pulled his hand back.

"You don't have to be afraid" Blaine told him. "I'll be there with you. You're not alone, Kurt."

He squeezed Kurt's hand and it seemed to help. Kurt took a deep breath and nodded.

"Alright. Let's go!" he said determinedly.

Blaine nodded and opened the door for him. They said a quick goodbye and they were already on their way. Kurt turned back a few times, as if he couldn't decide if he wanted to go or run back to their home. Blaine didn't let go of his hand and when Kurt stopped, he squeezed it. It seemed to help. Kurt relaxed a bit every time Blaine's grip on his hand tightened.

They spent the entire way in silence. Kurt seemed to be lost in his thoughts and Blaine didn't want to bother him. He knew how hard it was for Kurt. He had read a lot, so he started to understand what Kurt was going through. And he was so proud of him. Kurt was really brave that he talked to him, that he had shared his fears with Blaine and he was determined to fight for his health. If it was possible, Blaine loved him more than ever.

"I'll wait for you out here" Blaine said when they arrived.

"I thought you would come in with me" Kurt said quietly, his eyes wide with fear.

"I don't think it's a good idea" Blaine said slowly. He didn't want to hurt Kurt, he only wanted him to get better. He also knew that it was hard for Kurt to talk about his feelings and it was definitely easier when Blaine wasn't around. At least that was what the therapist said. Blaine hoped that she was right. "You have so much to discuss, I would only disturb you. But don't be afraid. Doctor Wilson knows her job. You'll be fine."

"I thought we wouldn't come to a doctor!" Kurt said suddenly.

Blaine sighed. He didn't understand what was the problem but tried to help Kurt calm down.

"She has a PhD" Blaine explained. "Don't be afraid. She only wants to help you, remember?"

Kurt took a deep breath and nodded. He could do this. And if he was honest with himself, he agreed with Blaine. It would be a lot easier to talk to a stranger about his feelings without having his family around. When he was with Blaine, he was constantly worried that he was doing something wrong. But Doctor Wilson wouldn't tell Blaine anything, so Kurt was safe to talk freely.

Soon the door opened and an older woman stepped out. She was short, with long blond hair and big blue eyes. She seemed nice for the first sight and it made Kurt somewhat calmer.

"You must be Mr Hummel" she smiled. "Melinda Wilson. It's nice to meet you."

"It's nice to meet you, too" Kurt said. He had no idea how she knew that she wasn't talking to Blaine. Was it so obvious that he was the one who needed help?

"And you are Mr Anderson, right?" Doctor Wilson asked.

"Yes" Blaine said and stepped forward to shake her hand. "We're really happy to be here."

"I'm happy you called me" Doctor Wilson said. "Can we go, Kurt? May I call you Kurt?"

"Of course, Doctor Wilson" Kurt nodded.

"Please, call me Melinda" she said.

"Alright" Kurt nodded.

"I'll be waiting out here" Blaine said. "Just tell me if you need anything."

Kurt wanted to tell him that he only needed to go home, immediately, but he stopped himself. He tried to convince himself that there was nothing to be afraid of. That Melinda would help him, that she wouldn't judge him. It wasn't that easy, though. He was so scared.

He took a seat once they were inside and inhaled deeply. He had no idea what to expect. He had to talk about his feelings for sure. Where should he start? He didn't even know if he was ready to share his feelings with a stranger.

To keep himself busy, he looked around. The room looked quite well. It was light with nice colors and comfortable looking furniture. There were flowers, too. And some photos of happy families. It helped Kurt calm down a bit. Doctor Wilson couldn't be a bad person if she had such a nice room, right?

"What do you think of the decoration?" Melinda asked as she sat down.

Kurt blinked in surprise. Did she really want to talk about decoration?

"It's nice" he said. "I like the colors."

"Working in a nice environment makes everything so much better, don't you think?" she smiled. "I love the color of the walls."

"I picked something similar for the nursery of Emily" Kurt said. "Oh, she's our daughter."

"She must love it!" Melinda said excitedly. "Why did you choose that color?"

"I saw it in a magazine" Kurt said tentatively. Why were they talking about colors? He still didn't understand a thing. He thought that they would talk about his problems.

"I heard that you work in the fashion industry" Melinda said next. "Please, tell me about it. It must be an interesting job."

She seemed so excited, Kurt didn't want to change topic, especially not to a more serious one. He liked his job and talking about it seemed so much easier than sharing his fears with the therapist. So he took a deep breath and gathered his thoughts, so he didn't forget any of the important details.

~ o ~

"How was it?" Blaine asked as they stepped out of the building. Kurt didn't say a word when he joined him, he only grabbed Blaine's hand and after waving goodbye to Doctor Wilson, they left. But there was something different in Kurt's movements. His steps were so much lighter than before.

"It was good" Kurt said. "I don't understand why but I'm feeling so much better! We didn't even talk about my problems. She mostly asked me about my job."

"She has to get to know you" Blaine reminded him.

"It felt great" Kurt said. "Taking about my job, I mean. I didn't know that I missed it so badly."

"Do you want to go back?" Blaine asked.

"Not yet" Kurt shook his head. "I want to get better first. Besides, Emily is so small. I'm not sure I'm ready to leave her to a stranger."

"It's your choice" Blaine told him. "Whatever you want to do, I'll support your decision. You know that, right?"

To his surprise, Kurt stopped and moved closer to hug him. It felt weird. After weeks of pulling away from him, Kurt finally made a step towards him. It had to be a good sign. Blaine didn't know what Melinda had done to him, but Kurt seemed to be doing better. Blaine hoped that she would be able to help Kurt find his old self.

"Would you like a coffee? We don't have to go straight home. I talked to Rachel while your session, they're fine."

"I still want to go home. I'm tired" Kurt said.

"Okay" Blaine nodded. He didn't want to push Kurt. Coming out of the apartment and having his first session with his therapist had to be exhausting. Maybe the next time. He only wanted to get the old Kurt back, that was the most important. Everything else could wait.


	35. Chapter 35

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Here is the new chapter. I hope you like it.**

His sessions with Doctor Wilson weren't that bad after all. Although Kurt wasn't sure if talking about clothes and colors would help him the slightest, he found himself enjoying these hours he spent away from home and with the woman. Melinda was a nice woman who always smiled. She was so positive. Kurt was secretly jealous. He wished he could see the bright side of everything so easily. It would have made everything so much better.

He was impatient. Those few hours he spent away from home were really great but he thought that it would make him feel better a lot faster. He wasn't sure what to expect but it was time to have a normal life. He tried to force himself but it didn't work. So he decided to ask Melinda about it.

It was easy to think about it, but when he was there and he had to talk… He stopped. It felt like he did something wrong. Blaine told him that it was natural, that he had nothing to be scared of, that Doctor Wilson understood him and he could share everything with her. Blaine also told him over and over again that he could talk to him honestly. That he wouldn't see him differently. Kurt still felt ashamed for not being the father and fiancé he was supposed to be.

"Kurt?"

Kurt blinked in surprise and looked up at the woman sitting in front of him. He must have zoomed out. Again. It had happened a few other times, when he realized that they hadn't been talking about his problems and he had thought that it was wrong. He visited Melinda to get better, not to talk to her about work and other stuff.

"I'm sorry" Kurt said.

"It's okay" Melinda smiled. How could she be so happy all the time? "Do you want to ask something?"

"I…" Kurt wasn't sure where to start. If it was right. But Blaine believed that he could share his secrets with Melinda and Kurt trusted him. He had nothing to lose after all. "I'm just thinking about my situation."

"That's understandable" Melinda nodded.

"Shouldn't I feel differently?" Kurt asked. "I mean… I like being here but when I go home, nothing seems to be better."

"You need more time" Melinda said.

"How much?" Kurt asked impatiently.

"That's always different" Melinda said. "Some people get over their problems quite easily. Others like us need more time."

That caught Kurt's attention.

"Do you have children?" he asked.

"Yes, I do" Melinda nodded. "A boy and a girl. They are 14 and 8."

"Why did you wait 6 years between the children?" Kurt asked before he could stop himself. He started to understand things.

"As I said, sometimes having a baby is a lot harder than you think" Melinda said. "I went through the same trouble you're facing right now. After the birth of my son."

"Really?" Kurt asked with wide eyes.

"I thought that Sebastian told you about it" Melinda smiled. "I didn't want to be a therapist. I'm the creative type like you. I was a painter before the birth of my first child."

"So that's why you talk about colors so much" Kurt muttered.

"Partly" Melinda nodded. "I'm also trying to make contact. It's not so easy to figure out what people need, you know."

"It makes easier to trust you" Kurt agreed.

"I'm happy to hear that" Melinda replied.

"So what happened to you?" Kurt asked. He really wanted to know the truth. The thought that he wasn't alone with his feelings made him feel so much better. Melinda had been there, too, and now she was alright, she seemed so happy, and Kurt wanted to be like her so badly.

"I was so young when my son was born" Melinda said. "I still thought that I was ready. I read everything about babies, I watched videos, so I thought that I would be the perfect mother. Only it wasn't so simple. I started to have these bad feelings in the hospital. I held my son in my arms and I felt nothing. I knew that I should have been happy but I couldn't have been farther from that."

"Was it better when you got home?" Kurt asked.

"No" Melinda shook her head. "It was worse if it's possible. I could barely look at my own child. I was constantly tired and didn't have energy to do anything. We barely left the house. I just didn't feel like I should go anywhere. And as time passed, it became worse."

"That's how I'm feeling, too" Kurt nodded.

"I felt ashamed" Melinda continued. "I knew that what I was doing was wrong. I wanted my son, I really wanted him, but I couldn't make myself be happy to have him. It made everything worse when I saw him with my husband. It seemed so easy for him. I was afraid of telling him about how I felt. I was scared that he would leave me, that I would lose him and our child as well."

"I know that Blaine loves me but I have the same fears" Kurt said. "I know that I should be a better father and fiancé but it's so hard. How could you get over it?"

"It was hard" Melinda said. "I had no one to talk to. No one but my husband but I kept pushing him away. One day we had a serious talk, though."

"Did he threaten you to leave you?" Kurt asked.

"No" Melinda laughed. "I don't think he would ever do that to me. He's the strongest person I know. He helped me a lot, actually. He read a lot about PPD and we discussed everything. He spent a lot more time at home and helped me. I didn't see progress for a while, but one day I realized that I was feeling better. I needed attention and I got that from him."

"But it's so hard to talk about it" Kurt said.

"You need courage to open up, but once you realize that you can trust your partner, it makes everything easier" Melinda said. "People find it so hard to talk about this situation. That's because everybody talks about the bright side of having children. People like us think that we do something wrong but it's not true. It's something you can't prevent. You can search for the reasons but you don't always find them. So you have to focus on understanding. If you don't think that you are a bad parent anymore, it's easier."

"But I am a bad parent" Kurt said.

"No, you aren't" Melinda said. "Only you made the mistake to let himself believe that what's happening to you is bad. As I said, most people find it hard to talk about their feelings. Or to get help, even if it makes it so much easier to get over their problems. Luckily, I see more and more women use the modern technology to talk honestly. And it helps others, too."

"You do this for the same reason" Kurt said in understanding.

"Yes, I do. And I have to tell you, it's the best thing that could happen to me" Melinda smiled. "This job is perfect for me. Don't get me wrong, I loved painting, but I missed being around people. As I think you already figured out, I talk a lot. It's hard when I don't have company."

"I know" Kurt smiled. "I love being around people, too."

"Why don't you try it again?" Melinda asked. "Don't forget, you have nothing to worry about. You're still the man you were before the birth of your baby."

Kurt hoped that she was right about it.

~ o ~

When Blaine got home the next day, he found Kurt with Emily in his arms, sitting in front of his laptop. It was strange. Kurt barely used that thing anymore. He told Blaine that he didn't need it anymore.

"Are you alright?" Blaine asked as he stepped to them.

"Sure. I'm just making a research" Kurt answered.

"On what?" Blaine asked. He leaned down to kiss Kurt and then Emily's forehead.

"Blogs" Kurt answered. "Do you know how many women share their experiences about PPD online? It's so brave of them."

Blaine raised an eyebrow and leaned down again to look at the page Kurt was reading.

"She's about my age" Kurt said. "She had two babies in two years and after the birth of her second child, she noticed that something wasn't right. She didn't have any symptoms, she only realized that she wasn't able to leave the house anymore."

"That must have been awful" Blaine said.

"Yeah" Kurt nodded. "She was too afraid to ask for help at first."

"So what happened to her?" Blaine asked. The woman on the photo with the two boys seemed so happy. So it meant she found a way to get over her problems.

"She went through it all alone" Kurt answered. "Can you believe it? She must be so strong! So forced herself to leave the house, she also started working out and it helped her a lot. Now look at her! She seems so happy."

"She is" Blaine nodded.

"And there are plenty like her. Like me" Kurt said. "I can't believe it's so common. I thought that it's just me being crazy."

"I told you, honey, you aren't crazy" Blaine said and put an arm around Kurt. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too" Kurt smiled.

That was new. Kurt barely told him that he loved him and he practically never smiled. It had to be a good sign. Blaine was so happy to see it, he almost laughed.

"Do you have any plans for the afternoon?" Kurt asked.

"No" Blaine shook his head. "Do you want to do something?"

"Yes. I want to go to the park with you and Emily" Kurt said.

Blaine blinked in surprise. He had asked Kurt to go out so many times but he had always said no. He needed so much time to admit to Blaine that it made him so nervous that sometimes Kurt felt like he was about to have a panic attack. But now Kurt wanted to go out, it was his own idea… The only question was if he was ready. Blaine didn't want him to push himself too hard.

"Are you sure you're ready?" Blaine asked carefully.

"I think it's time to do something" Kurt nodded. "I don't want to sit here and wait to get better. I know that I'm the only one able to help myself. The sessions with Melinda help a lot, but I have to do something, too. That's the only way."

"We don't have to go anywhere if you don't feel ready" Blaine said. He was happy that Kurt came up with the idea alone but he didn't want his fiancé to rush things.

"I think I am" Kurt said. "Come on, honey. I miss our walks."

Blaine smiled and get up to grab a few things they would need in the park. Soon their daughter was dressed and waiting for them in the stroller. Kurt disappeared in the bathroom for a while and when he came back, Blaine was surprised to see him in his working clothes. Since the birth of Emily, Kurt only wore comfortable clothes, telling Blaine that his favorite pieces didn't fit anymore. Now that Blaine saw it himself, he could tell that Kurt was ready to get back to his original style. His tight jeans, black jacket and boots looked so perfect on him. Kurt seemed to be more confident, too. It was so good to see him like this.

"You're beautiful, Kurt" Blaine smiled.

"I was afraid that my clothes didn't fit anymore" Kurt looked down at himself.

"Of course they do" Blaine said.

"I should take better care of myself" Kurt said. "I should start working out again. I don't want to be too fat."

"Kurt, you're perfect" Blaine said. "But of course if you want to work out, we can manage that. Just tell me when you want to do it and I'll make sure you have enough free time."

"I think it would be good for me" Kurt said quietly. He remembered what he had read. Although he didn't feel like he had enough energy for anything but taking care of his daughter, he had to start somewhere.

"Whatever you want. You know that I'm always here, right?" Blaine said.

"I know" Kurt nodded. "I love you so much, Blaine."

"I love you, too" Blaine said and squeezed Kurt's hand.

They walked down to the street and towards the park in silence. Emily fell asleep almost immediately, just like every other time they went out. She loved being outside. Kurt wanted to feel the same way. For him, it was a huge challenge, although he kept smiling and tried to act like nothing was wrong. For him, the crowd and the loud noises were only frustrating. He was also scared, although he couldn't have explained why. He simply felt like something might get wrong and they should go back to the safety of their home.

Not this time, though, he reminded himself. He wanted to be strong. No, he WAS strong. Nothing could stop him. He was Kurt Hummel after all. He wouldn't run away when he had to face his fears. He would enjoy this afternoon with his family. He could do it.

Seeing the beauties wasn't that easy but Kurt found them no matter what. He had so many wonderful memories of this place. He had come here with Blaine so many times, hew knew where to find the well-hidden parts where the three of them could have privacy. For that day Kurt only had one plan, being together with his family without panic attack and fear of something he couldn't even describe. For now, he only wanted to be with his loved ones and enjoy their company. So they found themselves a place where no one would disturb them and sat down onto the warm grass.

"Do you remember this place?" Blaine asked. "We came here once…"

"To see the butterflies" Kurt nodded. "I know. I'll never forget that day."

Blaine smiled and reached for Kurt's hand. Of course he would never forget that day either. It had been the first time they had enjoyed being together without secrets. The first time Blaine had been sure that they had a future together.

"I missed the sunlight" Kurt said as he turned his head towards the sun and closed his eyes. He could hear the birds chirping in the background and as he inhaled deeply, he also smelled something great.

"We could come out here more often. If you want to, of course" Blaine said. He didn't want to push Kurt but he would be happy to spend more time with him outside. It was good for Kurt.

"That would be great" Kurt nodded. "As I said, I have to be stronger. I know what I have to do now. I want to get better and I'm willing to do anything for that."

"Just don't push yourself too hard, please" Blaine told him.

"I won't" Kurt replied. He already had a plan of what he wanted to do. The things he had read helped him a lot. Now he knew where to start. He wasn't sure if it would be enough but there was no rush. He accepted that he needed more time to get better and thanks to that, everything seemed a lot less complicated. He could do it.

"I'm so proud of you, you know" Blaine said.

Kurt turned to look at him again. It was easy to see that Blaine told him the truth. Kurt finally let himself believe that he had nothing to be scared of. It was hard, but for a second everything seemed perfect. He forgot about his problems and only thought about how lucky he was. He had a beautiful daughter and he was together with the most amazing man who loved him so much.

"Thank you, Blaine" he said.

"For what?" Blaine asked in confusion.

"For being so good to me" Kurt smiled.

He leaned closer and pressed his lips to Blaine's. It felt so right in that moment. And he had missed it so much. He loved kissing Blaine. His lips were so warm and sweet and so right on his.

"Wow" Blaine said when Kurt pulled away.

"I hope it's a good wow" Kurt said.

"Definitely a good wow" Blaine nodded.

Kurt wanted to kiss him again but before he could do anything, Emily made a soft noise that told the adults that she was awake.

"I guess we should take her out" Blaine said and got up. He leaned down and pulled the baby into his arms, then sat back down to Kurt.

"Hey, honey" Kurt said and reached out to stroke Emily's cheek. "Look where we are!"

"This is your fathers' favorite place" Blaine added.

"This is our place" Kurt nodded.

Blaine turned towards him with a warm smile on his face.

"Is it?" he asked.

"Of course it is" Kurt said and put an arm around him. "The most wonderful place of the city."

He leaned down to Emily.

"I'll tell you the story once you get older" he said.

"Really?" Blaine asked in surprise. "I mean… all of it?"

That made Kurt consider his words.

"Okay, maybe I'll skip a few details…"

"I would be glad for that" Blaine nodded.

They look at each other and after a second, they burst into laughter.

"God, we're still so crazy" Blaine shook his head.

"Is it a bad thing?" Kurt asked.

"No, it's great" Blaine said.

With his free hand, he reached for Kurt's and squeezed it. He did it quite often, probably because he knew that it warmed Kurt's heart every time. It reminded him that he wasn't alone, that he should never give up.

And he wouldn't. He was strong and he wouldn't forget that again. He would surely have bad days when things weren't as easy as now, but Kurt knew that he would get over them. Because he wasn't alone. No matter what happened, no matter how depressed he was, he enjoyed his loving family's support. And nothing could take that away from him.


	36. Chapter 36

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I hope you missed the girls because they are finally back! Enjoy!**

There were good days and bad days. Although Kurt tried to focus on the easy moments, he still had days when he struggled with the easiest things. He wanted to leave his problems behind so badly but it wasn't that easy. Sometimes it was so hard to get up from bed and spend time with his daughter. Sometimes he hesitated for so long before he was able to leave the apartment. But things became definitely easier for him and he knew that he was on the right path.

Reading about women with the same problems was what helped him the most. Although his sessions made him feel happier, he gathered strength from those women who had successfully left their fears behind. There were a lot of them. Kurt loved those who wrote about their feelings honestly. There was everything written in front of him, every hard moment, every fearful thought, and it made him stronger. Because he realized that he wasn't alone, that he wasn't a bad person and that there was a way to a happy and fearless life. The one he wanted, too.

When he was upset, he read. He gave himself time to calm down a bit and focused on the future. He could do this, too. He was strong. And he was a good father. He only had to find the right activity to get over his problems.

That wasn't that easy, though. He had talked about his plans with Melinda and she thought that it would be wonderful to find and activity that made him happy and helped him on his bad days. She thought that Kurt's creativity was the solution. Only Kurt didn't know what he should do with that. Okay, he had had great ideas before but it was so hard to think about clothes right now. He barely knew what to do with his own clothes, how could he come up with something new?

"Maybe you shouldn't try so hard" Blaine told him. "Give yourself time. There's no pressure."

Not from Blaine. But Kurt needed something to do to keep himself busy, so he had to come up with something as fast as possible.

One day he had a sudden idea. It seemed crazy at first but the more he thought about it, the more sense it made. He had been scared of talking to his friends, not counting Sebastian who was a doctor and that made him different. Kurt knew somewhere deep that his friends weren't that stupid and they knew exactly that he had problems. Rachel and Finn spent a lot of time with Emily when Kurt visited Melinda. Kurt had never told them where he went, but they surely figured it out. And they never said anything bad… That had to be a good sign.

Kurt was still afraid of talking to his friends. They were always nice to him, but who knew what they would think about him if they had known about his problems? Would they judge him?

He kept his phone in his shaking hands, trying to gather courage. He had nothing to be afraid of. His friends loved him. They wouldn't say anything bad. Of course not, they would help him for sure if he asked them. He only had to ask for help. They would be here in no time and together they would figure out what to do next.

"Are you alright?"

Kurt almost dropped his phone at the sudden voice. He blinked in surprise, not knowing what Blaine was doing right beside him. He should have been at work… right?

"You came home earlier" Kurt muttered.

"No, I didn't" Blaine smiled.

Kurt checked the time on his phone and gasped. He had spent the whole afternoon staring at his phone and he hadn't even realized how fast time had passed. Blaine was right, of course, even if it seemed unbelievable.

"Emily…"

"She's still asleep" Blaine told him.

Kurt sighed in relief. At least he hadn't let his daughter cry while being lost in his thoughts. Or so he hoped. It was unbelievable that he was able to zoom out in a second and didn't even notice it. Scary, if he was completely honest with himself. Did he do it often? That would be horrible...

"So what are you thinking about?" Blaine asked conversationally. He didn't seem angry at all. Why wasn't he angry?

"I think I should meet my friends" Kurt said carefully. He still waited for Blaine to show the signs of anger. But he was always so nice, it didn't matter what Kurt said or did. Whatever he came up with, Blaine supported him.

"That's a wonderful idea" Blaine smiled.

"Isn't it too early?" Kurt asked.

"Why would it be? You know that they miss you" Blaine replied.

"I… I think I should tell them about… you know" Kurt said hesitantly.

"I think it's about time" Blaine nodded. He had talked to Rachel and Finn, of course, he had to explain why they spent so much time away from home and their baby, but he had also asked them to keep the information to themselves. From what Blaine gathered from Kurt's other friends who didn't seem to understand why Kurt never called them back, it worked.

Kurt had a lot to explain, but Blaine knew that he would get over it. It was about time to meet his friends again. It meant that Kurt was feeling better. Of course Blaine knew that he was slowly coming out of depression, he saw the signs, even if the progress was so slow. Kurt talked a lot more than before and he spent more time away from their apartment. If he met his friends, it would definitely help him.

"What will they say?" Kurt asked in concern.

"Kurt, they are your friends" Blaine said. He remembered how vehemently they had defended Kurt when it had been necessary. Blaine wasn't worried about how they would react. They loved Kurt. "Come on, just call them. They'll be happy to see you."

Kurt looked down at his phone again. He knew that Blaine was right. His friends would surely be happy to meet him. Only he wasn't sure if he wanted to talk to them now. Knowing Mercedes and Santana, those phone calls would be… Well...

"I think I'll send them a text message" Kurt said in the end.

"Maybe that's not a bad idea" Blaine smiled.

~ o ~

"Where the hell have you been?"

Kurt tried not to laugh when Santana came straight to the point without greeting him. She didn't disappoint him at all.

"I'm happy to see you too, Santana" Kurt said.

"Do you know how many times I tried to contact you? I even called Blaine to ask him if you're still alive" Santana said.

"I know and I'm sorry" Kurt said.

"We were worried about you" Mercedes added.

Kurt smiled sadly. He knew that he shouldn't have ignored his friends, but the past few weeks had been hard. Very-very hard. It was a miracle that he was finally able to leave the apartment on his own without fearing that he would have a panic attack in the middle of the street.

"Are you alright?" Mercedes asked in concern.

Kurt took a deep breath but he couldn't say anything. He wanted to share his feelings with his friends, that was why he had asked them to meet him after all. But now that they were all together, he wasn't sure if he was ready to talk.

"Why don't we find a place where we can talk?" Rachel offered.

Kurt was glad for her help. Although he had made himself believe that they had kept his secret well hidden from everyone, one look at Rachel was enough to know that she understood the situation a lot better than he expected. No wonder, Blaine must have told her the details. Of course he had. Rachel and Finn had helped them a lot, they had surely had questions and Blaine had answered them.

"That's a great idea" Kurt nodded.

"It's such a shame you didn't call us earlier" Santana said after a while as they walked down a familiar path in the park. "Brittany wanted to see you, too."

"I miss her, too" Kurt said. "I'll call you sooner the next time, I swear."

"How is Emily doing?" Rachel asked quickly. She knew Kurt well enough to know why they were here and she was also aware of Kurt's fears. She wanted to give him time to get ready.

"She's wonderful" Kurt told her.

"Of course she is" Santana snorted. "Babies are always cute."

"I thought you hated kids" Mercedes frowned.

"I said babies. Not whiny spoiled 4-year-olds" Santana replied.

"I love older kids" Mercedes said. "It's a lot easier with them. They can talk and walk on their own, you can play with them a lot more…"

"I hate their tantrums" Santana cut in.

"Your kid will throw tantrums, too" Mercedes pointed out.

"My kid won't be like that" Santana said confidently.

"We'll see" Mercedes snorted.

Kurt tried to imagine Santana's child. A little girl like her with so much passion. He smiled. Santana was wrong if she thought it would be easy, especially if her child would be like her.

"So why did you ignore us so long?" Santana asked him once they sat down.

Kurt took a deep breath. He thought that he would have some more time to get ready. Unfortunately, Santana didn't seem to see that not everything was alright with him.

"I've been… busy" Kurt said hesitantly.

"We already told you that we would gladly babysit Emily if you needed some time on your own" Santana said.

"I needed help. I called Finn and Rachel when it was necessary" Kurt said.

"Why didn't you call us?" Mercedes asked. She didn't seem as hurt as Santana. Maybe she knew his secret, too?

"I…" Kurt looked down and took a few more deep breaths. It was so hard to talk. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to come here after all. "Look, there's something I want to talk about with you. And I hope you'll understand how serious it is."

He was silent for a while, just like his friends. They kept watching him while they waited for him to continue.

"I… I didn't call you or anyone else because… Well, I've had problems."

"What kind of problems?" Santana asked carefully.

"I didn't think it was serious at first. I was so exhausted after Emily's birth. I thought it was natural" Kurt said quietly. He tried to make himself believe that he had nothing to be ashamed of, but it wasn't that easy. "But then things became worse. I didn't leave the apartment anymore. I barely talked to Blaine and I was always so frustrated. And unhappy. God, it's so hard to talk about this…"

"Hey, it's okay" Mercedes said gently and grabbed Kurt's hand. Kurt smiled at him sadly. It wasn't okay at all. But he was determined to change and talking freely about his fears was one of those important things he had to do.

"No, it's not. To be honest, I'm disappointed. I imagined this time of my life and I always thought that it would be wonderful. That I would love my child and I would love parenthood. But I hated everything at one point and I lost precious time I should have spent with my daughter. I don't want to but sometimes I still feel ashamed. I feel like it's my fault that we couldn't enjoy these important weeks together the way we were supposed to. That I ruined everything."

He had thought that it would be hard to talk, he hadn't been sure if he would be able to share his feelings honestly with his friends. But once he started to talk, it was hard to stop. He finally remembered that they had always been there for him and he knew that they wouldn't judge him. He had been so stupid to think that ignoring his friends was the best he could do. Now he knew that he shouldn't have pushed them away in the hardest moments.

"You should have told us" Santana said.

"I know" Kurt muttered, looking away. "I just wasn't ready. I wasn't even ready to talk to anyone for a long while. I thought that I would get better, so I waited. I waited for too long."

"Don't say that" Rachel said. "You asked for help. You were brave enough to talk to a stranger. That's a huge thing."

"What is she talking about?" Santana frowned, nodding towards Rachel.

"I'm seeing a therapist" Kurt admitted. "I talked to Sebastian when I realized that it's too much to handle on my own and he has a friend who helps people like me. Rachel knows about it because we asked her and Finn to babysit Emily when Blaine had to come with me. I couldn't leave the house alone at first, I needed Blaine to come with me."

"That's awful" Mercedes said before Santana had a chance to say anything. Sometimes she didn't help at all, even if she only wanted the best. Mercedes had a feeling that whatever she had to say, she would choose the wrong words and it would upset Kurt. That was the least he needed. "I can't imagine how hard it is. You're so brave, Kurt!"

"I'm not" Kurt said, looking away. He always told himself that it wasn't his fault but still felt guilty sometimes.

"Hey, stop it" Santana said seriously.

They all looked at her, the other women slightly worried. They knew Santana and that she couldn't always stop herself from hurting people. Kurt definitely didn't need her harsh words right now.

"You can't blame yourself anymore, okay?" Santana continued. "PPD is an awful thing. It makes you weak and sad all the time. Mercedes is right, you're brave, Kurt. Admitting that you have problems is so freaking hard."

"You have no idea" Kurt muttered.

"You can always talk to us if you want to" Rachel said.

"You can ask for anything" Mercedes continued.

"Absolutely anything" Santana nodded in agreement.

Kurt looked at her thoughtfully. Santana was acting so weirdly. He had a feeling that she knew more about his situation than the others, he only didn't know how. He decided to ask her about it but not now. It was something they had to discuss privately.

"Well, that's why I asked you to meet me today" Kurt said. "I noticed that reading about women in my situation helped me a lot. So I read tones of their blogs, practically everything I found on Internet. There are a lot of happy endings. I also noticed that they found an activity that made them feel useful and was also manageable with a baby. So I started to think about things I could do to make myself busy."

"That's a good idea" Rachel smiled. "Do you want to sing again?"

"No" Kurt shook his head. "Although I love performing, I know that's not my thing. Not anymore. I'll save my voice for my daughter, I want to do something different."

"And what is it?" Mercedes asked curiously.

"I know someone from close who struggled like me after the birth of her child" Kurt started hesitantly. He decided that he wouldn't tell his friends that he was talking about his therapist. Melinda had trusted him to keep her secret or so Kurt believed, so he thought that he should skip a few details. "She's a lot like me, I think. She's also creative and had a similar job. But then she decided to change her life and also help people like us. Now she lives for new parents and helps them through this hard period."

He smiled at the thought. It was a wonderful thing to do. Knowing that Melinda had gotten through the same fears and now she was so happy made Kurt a lot more confident, too. He wanted to be like her.

"I want to do something like that" he continued. "And that's why I'm asking for your help."

"We'll do anything you want" Rachel said confidently.

"That's good" Kurt smiled. "Because you have to keep a few moody babies company while I create wonderful things with their moms."

"What?" Santana frowned.

"I decided to do something for depressed parents, too" Kurt explained. He reached for his phone and showed the women a few photos. "I started a blog, too. I update my newest creations and also give women tips how to dress themselves and their babies fashionably without spending too much money. See? People love it! And thanks to my blog, I found others like me. That's only the three of us now but I guess there will be others. I think we should come together sometimes and create something together. What do you think?"

"Well…" Santana started but Mercedes quickly silenced her with one stern look.

"I think it's a wonderful idea" Mercedes smiled.

"So you'll help me?" Kurt asked. "I know you're busy…"

"Of course we'll help you" Rachel said. "Besides, we have to practice if we want to be ready."

"For having a baby?" Santana asked with a raised eyebrow.

"For playing more serious roles" Rachel rolled her eyes. "As a famous actress, I have to think about my future. I always need to educate myself, I have to be ready for every situation. I would be the perfect choice for the role of a caring mother but I still need to practice a little to do everything right."

"Always so selfless" Mercedes snorted.

"And I also want to help Kurt" Rachel added quickly.

"I really appreciate it" Kurt said gladly. "What do you think, guys?"

"I'm in" Mercedes said without hesitation.

"Me too" Santana said. "Kids love me."

"I thought you hated babies" Mercedes frowned.

"But they do love me" Santana said. "Don't worry, Kurt. Have fun with the mums. I'll take care of the kids."

"You mean we will take care of them" Rachel corrected her.

"Almost the same" Santana shrugged.

"If you mean that I'm not capable of keeping a few babies company…"

Kurt threw back his head and laughed. He had missed the girls so much. They always knew how to make him smile. And now that he knew that he could count on them, he could finally start to think about the details. There were a lot of things to do but it was good. It would make him busy for a while and he had a good feeling about his plans. He believed that they would help him through this period and he would be able to live happily again. That was all he wanted. For himself and his family, too.


	37. Chapter 37

**Hi Everyone!**

 **I know it's been a while. I have a lot of work to do and unfortunately, I'm going to have a surgery soon. That means a lot of doctor's visits and that makes me really tired. I hope things get easier after I recover.**

 **But let's see what we have here, right?**

 **I'm updating all of my stories, you really deserve it after waiting for so long. Enjoy!**

"Are you nervous?"

Kurt looked up from the table and smiled at Blaine. Blaine knew him too well. Of course he was nervous, it was the first time he met other parents who were struggling to be healthy again. It wasn't like there were too many, he only found a few women interested in his plan, but it was a start. He had no idea how it would turn out, if it would be good or not, but he was excited and he hoped that those women would enjoy this afternoon just as much as he did.

"Excited" he answered. "But you're right. I'm somewhat nervous, too. I hope they'll have a great time."

"Of course they will" Blaine said and out an arm around Kurt. "You've done a great job here. I'm so proud of you."

He said that all the time but it felt always so great. Blaine was amazing. He always knew what to do or say to make Kurt feel good. It helped him a lot. Blaine helped him get his confidence back and it made everything so much easier. Kurt didn't have panic attacks anymore and he took parenthood a lot better. He could finally sleep at night and had enough energy to take care of his daughter by day. It was amazing that he could leave the house without help and wasn't scared of taking Emily to the park anymore. Or anywhere else. Since he realized that nothing would happen to them, they went out a lot more often. Sometimes they visited Blaine at work, sometimes they met Kurt's friends. They went shopping together, they had lunch in Kurt's favorite restaurant. It was absolutely great. Kurt wished this time never ended. Okay, he still had bad days but he always reminded himself that he should focus on the good things. Everything else would go away with time.

"Thank you for supporting me" Kurt said. "I really want this. I need this."

"I know, honey" Blaine said. "Don't worry. No one will disturb you and your new friends."

Kurt looked at the girls in the other room. His friends were here, too, they had promised to watch the kids while Kurt had fun with their parents. They brought toys, soft blankets and everything possible to make the kids enjoy the afternoon. Kurt hoped that it was enough.

"Kurt, I guess they are here" Rachel said and nodded towards the door.

Kurt took a deep breath and walked to the door. True to Rachel's words, there were two mothers standing awkwardly, holding their children. Kurt tried to seem as confident as possible as he walked to them.

"Hey" he greeted them. "I'm Kurt Hummel."

He was surprised when one of the women stepped to him and hugged him tightly.

"Uhm… thanks" he muttered.

"I'm Jane" the young woman said.

"You came!" Kurt said excitedly. Although he had never seen her before, they had been in touch for a good while. He knew that Jane had had a lot of trouble after giving birth to her son and she had dealt with it all alone because her husband had left her and their child.

"I wouldn't have missed it" Jane smiled.

"I'm so happy" Kurt said and turned to the other woman. He needed a second to figure out who the quiet lady could have been, but he recognized the girl in her arms quickly. "Mia!"

"That's me" she said shyly.

"I'm glad you came" Kurt said. "I guess that means that you both came out of that nasty cold. That's great!"

"Thank you" Mia said. "It was really hard. I can't believe we survived for almost two weeks without any sleep."

"You're really strong" Kurt said. "Are you ready for some fun, ladies? We've planned something wonderful for today."

"Is that your daughter?" Jane asked as she nodded towards Blaine and Emily who were now playing on the ground with a soft toy they had brought from home.

"Yes. And that's my boyfriend, Blaine" Kurt said proudly.

"It's nice to meet you" Blaine smiled at them.

"And we are the amazing nannies who will watch your kids" Santana said as she stood up from the ground.

"These are my friends, Santana, Rachel and Mercedes" Kurt introduced them. "They volunteered to play with our children, so we can relax."

"Is it okay?" Mia asked.

"Of course it is" Santana said and took the little girl from her. The baby seemed surprised at first but before she could decide what to do, Santana put her down onto the blanket and pushed a soft toy into her hands. "See? You have nothing to worry about."

Kurt was afraid of what Mia would think about his friends but she seemed to be fine. Jane joined them, too and put her son down. The boy watched his mother for a while but when he realized that nothing bad would happen to him, he pushed himself away from his mother and towards the colorful toys lying on the ground in front of him.

"Ladies, if you're ready, we could start" Kurt said.

"You would start it without me?"

They all turned towards the now open door and watched Melinda walk in. She was breathing heavily as if she had been running. Kurt could definitely imagine her running through the city after leaving home too late. She was just like that.

"I guess you already know Melinda" Kurt said.

"Sure" Jane smiled. "So are you joining us, too?"

"I wouldn't have missed a chance to learn from the famous Kurt Hummel" Melinda said.

Kurt was a little nervous as everyone looked at him expectantly. He had planned a lot of things for this day but he had forgotten that he had to deal with the extra attention, too. He closed his eyes for a second and took a deep breath, reminding himself why they were here. When he opened his eyes again, he knew that everything would be fine.

"Follow me, ladies" he said in the end.

He looked from one table to the other, satisfied with what they had prepared. He had a lot of ideas now that he was more or less back to his usual self. It was a good sign. He had also contacted Isabelle to let her know what he planned to write in the next months. He was on the good way, he knew.

"We're doing something beautiful for ourselves today" Kurt said. "Can you sew?"

Jane nodded but the others seemed nervous. Kurt almost laughed when he looked at Melinda. She was always so confident but she seemed to be afraid of what they would do soon.

"Don't worry, I'll teach you. But first… I want you to close your eyes and imagine what you would like to wear."

He watched the others curiously. He wasn't sure if they would like his idea, but it seemed like they liked it. Even Melinda seemed excited, although she knew what they were about to do.

"Are you ready?" Kurt asked after a while.

The others nodded.

"Very good, ladies" Kurt said. "Let's make something fabulous for you!"

~ o ~

Kurt's idea worked pretty well. He met the mothers every week and it wasn't only the four of them anymore. There were others who couldn't make it to their first meeting but came to the next one. They also called their friends and soon there were about a dozen of them. Kurt made sure they had something new to do every time and he was really proud of the others. They were talented, all of them. He couldn't wait for their next session because he knew that it would be spend in a very good mood. They talked and laughed a lot, and they made beautiful clothes for themselves.

Kurt wasn't the only one who found it exciting. He told Isabelle about their group and she came up with an idea that surprised Kurt.

"Why don't you start a do-it-yourself series? Our readers would love it!" she said.

Kurt wasn't sure what to say. He finally found himself ready to write again but he didn't know if he was creative enough for a bigger project. He was still tired most of the time, Emily needed him a lot and he wanted to spend extra time with Blaine, too, to make up for avoiding him for so long. He still had to visit Melinda, there were his friends, too, and he had to be careful not to do too much because he didn't want to slip back to depression again.

"What do you want to do?" Blaine asked when Kurt told him about Isabelle's idea.

"I don't know" Kurt said uncertainly. "I have ideas. I think I could do it but I don't want to work too hard at first. Melinda told me to be careful."

"She's right" Blaine nodded. "Isabelle understands, you know. You don't have to do more than you want to. You have to take care of yourself."

"And you" Kurt smiled.

"Well, that's true" Blaine smiled and stepped closer to put his arms around Kurt. "What are your plans for Saturday?"

"Do you have something in your mind?" Kurt asked.

"I do" Blaine said.

"And what is it?" Kurt asked.

"A surprise" Blaine answered.

"I hate surprises" Kurt said.

"That's not true and we both know" Blaine replied. "Don't worry. You'll love this one."

Kurt sighed and shook his head. He had no idea what Blaine planned but he knew that he wouldn't find out too soon. Blaine kept his secrets quite well when he wanted to.

"At least tell me what to wear" Kurt said.

"Something sexy" Blaine told him shortly. Before Kurt could ask more, Blaine pressed his lips to his cheek. He didn't stop there, his lips wandered down to Kurt's jawline and then to his neck.

"Blaine Anderson! Are you trying to lure me to your bed?" Kurt asked.

"Maybe" Blaine said between kisses.

"Then you're dong a great job" Kurt said. He quickly checked if Emily was still asleep and then grabbed Blaine's hands. "Let's go!"

He didn't need to tell Blaine twice.

~ o ~

Kurt made a final check in the mirror to see if everything was perfect and he smiled. He had missed his old self so much and it was so good to be back. He took his time picking the perfect clothes out, he styled his hair and now that he was done and he looked at his reflection, he knew that he looked good. Not just good, stunning. It was amazing. He finally believed that he wasn't fat, that he didn't look exhausted all the time, that working so hard in the previous weeks was worth it. He didn't feel ashamed as he watched himself, there was no reason to be. He was young and hot and Blaine would absolutely love to spend the night with him. Although Kurt had no idea what Blaine had planned, he was excited to spend the night together with him. It was time for a date, they absolutely deserved it.

He was somewhat nervous about leaving Emily home, though. His first thought had been asking Rachel and Finn since the two of them knew their daughter the most and they had kept her alive before, but they had other plans. Kurt had been ready to call the date off when his father and Carole arrived for a surprise visit. They convinced Kurt that everything was going to be alright and that he deserved a night off. Kurt wasn't so sure but his father reminded him that he already had a grown-up son and he was perfectly capable of taking care of a baby. Carole simply tried to calm him down a bit. Kurt still made them promise to call him if something happened, so he and Blaine could come home.

"Wow."

Kurt looked up to see Blaine leaning against the doorframe, smiling.

"What do you think?" Kurt asked.

"I think that I'm the luckiest person of the world to have such a hot fiancé" Blaine answered.

Oh. Kurt almost forgot about that in the crazy moments of the previous weeks. Blaine wasn't just his boyfriend anymore. Although they had never talked about the details, he had said yes after all, so they were engaged now. And they would get married someday soon. Maybe he should discuss the topic with Blaine after dinner. It would be so romantic.

"Is there something wrong?" Blaine frowned.

"No" Kurt shook his head. He walked to Blaine and took his hands. "I'm just excited to spend the night with you."

"I'm happy to hear that" Blaine smiled. "Are you ready to go? I don't want to be late."

"Sure" Kurt said.

After checking on their daughter one last time, Kurt took a deep breath and stepped out of the apartment, holding Blaine's hand. He didn't want to feel bad for leaving Emily with her grandparents while having some fun with Blaine but he couldn't help it. For weeks he had spent way too much time away from her and now again… It didn't feel right. But Blaine kept telling him it was going to be alright, that he had done nothing wrong and that Emily loved him. It helped a lot. And Blaine was so excited, Kurt didn't want to ruin their night.

"So where are we going?" Kurt asked.

"It's a surprise" Blaine answered.

"You and your surprises…" Kurt sighed.

"Believe me, you'll love this one" Blaine reassured him.

Kurt thought that they would have dinner but when they arrived, Kurt frowned. He recognized the place. It was where he had spent his last birthday with his friends. Where he had first met Blaine. It was...

"Why are we here?" Kurt asked as he opened the door.

"Surprise!"

Kurt started at the loud voices coming from everywhere. For a second the place was dark but then every light went on and he saw his friends, the old ones from high school, his new ones from their parent club, Blaine's friends and everybody possible. Kurt blinked in surprise. That was completely unexpected.

"What…"

"Happy birthday, honey" Blaine smiled.

Kurt opened his mouth but nothing came out. Probably because he was shocked. Blaine was right, of course, it was his birthday. Only he had been too busy to remember. But Blaine remembered. He didn't only remember, he had planned a surprise party for him. He had called Burt for sure, he had planned everything… It was so nice.

"Do you like it?" Blaine asked uncertainly. "Because you look like…"

"I love you so much" Kurt said honestly and threw his arms around Blaine.

"Don't be selfish, Blaine, we want a hug from the birthday boy, too" Mercedes said and pulled Kurt away from Blaine after a minute or so. "Happy birthday!"

"Thank you" Kurt said and hugged her, too. He wanted to hug them all.

"My turn!" Rachel said.

"Okay, ladies, leave him alone" Sebastian said when all the girls wished happy birthday for Kurt and pulled him away from the crowd gathering around the man. "You okay? No panic attack or something?"

"Don't I look okay?" Kurt asked. He knew that Sebastian was a doctor and he often acted like one, but they were here to have fun. And he couldn't wait to dance with his friends or talk to them. He was definitely fine.

"I just want to make sure you're okay with this crowd" Sebastian said. "Melinda couldn't come, so she made me promise to keep an eye on you."

"That's sweet but you don't have to worry about me" Kurt said. "Why don't we have something to drink?"

"Such a good suggestion" Sebastian smiled.

Kurt couldn't believe that he hadn't known how much he missed his friends until this night. Now that everyone he loved was here, he wanted to have a word with all of them. He talked to Blaine's friends who seemed to be relaxed like everybody else. There was no sign of anger in Jeff's eyes when Kurt finally made himself talk to him. He acted like an old friend of Kurt. It was really nice.

Then he talked to his newly gotten friends. He knew that they rarely had the opportunity to have a night off and they all seemed really glad for the invitation. Kurt was happy to see them here, too. Although they didn't know each other for too long, they had gotten really close in the previous weeks. And Kurt finally had someone to talk about baby topics.

After talking to the women, he danced with Blaine, enjoying the slow tune until he could. He loved dancing with Blaine, being so close to him… and he made himself a silent promise while moving slowly with his fiancé to make the end of the night unforgettable for the two of them. Before he could share his thoughts with Blaine, though, Rachel pulled him away from him for the next song. Then Santana and Brittany pulled him away and when Kurt finally sat down next to Mercedes, he felt exhausted. In a very good way, though.

"Would like to drink something?" Mercedes asked.

"Water" Kurt said and reached for the battle. "Damn, those girls can dance."

"You don't have to tell me, we spent three years in glee club together, remember?" Mercedes smiled.

"Give me five minutes and I'm yours for the next song" Kurt winked.

"Thanks, but I would like to sit here for a while" Mercedes said. "I'm not feeling well."

Kurt was about to ask her if she was sick when he understood the meaning of the mysterious smile on her face.

"Oh my God!" he cried out happily. "Does it mean that you and Sam…"

"We're going to have a baby" Mercedes said.

"I'm so happy for you, guys" Kurt said. "Does it mean that you two are doing fine?"

He knew that Mercedes and Sam had had some problems but he really hoped that they had sorted things out. Having a baby brought enough complication to a relationship.

"We are fine" Mercedes nodded. "We had to work a lot on our relationship but we're alright. We're going to have the family we always wanted and we'll love this little one so much."

"I know you will" Kurt smiled. "And you can always call me if you need help."

"I guess we will" Mercedes said.

"What's going on?"

Blaine sat down beside Kurt and Sam joined them almost at the same time on Mercedes' other side. He put an arm around the woman and smiled at her.

"Hm, I guess your problems are solved" Blaine muttered.

"You know about them?" Kurt asked in surprise.

"Sam and I had a talk when… never mind" Blaine said quickly.

"I feel like there's something we should know about" Mercedes smiled.

"It's nothing, really" Blaine waved her off.

"But we have some great news to share with you, guys" Sam smiled. "We're going to have a baby, too!"

"Are you serious?" Blaine laughed.

"Mercedes has just told me" Kurt nodded.

"Wow. That's great! Congratulations, guys!" Blaine said.

"Your daughter is going to have a little boy or girl to play with" Mercedes said.

"Not just one as I know" Blaine muttered.

Everyone turned to look at him.

"What you do mean?" Kurt asked.

"Is there someone else pregnant, too?" Mercedes asked excitedly.

"Not yet" Blaine said mysteriously.

"Come on, you have to tell us the details!" Kurt said.

"I can't do that" Blaine sighed. "I made a promise, you know."

"But I'm your fiancé!" Kurt said.

"You still have to wait for the news, my darling" Blaine told him.

"You're unbelievable, Blaine Anderson" Kurt shook his head.

"Does it mean that you'll still marry me?" Blaine asked.

"I might reconsider my answer" Kurt replied.

"That's not fair, Kurt! You already said yes!"

"And when will you get married?" Mercedes asked. "I hope it happens before the birth of our baby because I don't want to miss it, you know."

"Of course" Kurt said and turned to Blaine, knowing that he would surprise the man with his next words. "I didn't change my mind, of course. I want to marry you, Blaine. To be honest, I want to marry you as soon as possible."

"Well, I guess we can organize the wedding in a year or so…"

"I don't want anything fancy" Kurt said. "I'm serious, Blaine. I only want to be your husband. Nothing else matters. I want to get married as soon as possible."

"Wow" Blaine said.

"Is that a good wow?" Kurt asked.

"It definitely is" Blaine smiled.

If anyone had told Kurt one year earlier that his life would take such a crazy and unexpected turn, he would have thought that that person was crazy. Nothing had happened like planned, no matter how precisely he usually planned the important details of his life. But he didn't regret anything. Although they had had a rocky start, they had had a lot problems, it was the past. They were still here, together, happier than ever, parents of the most beautiful and peaceful baby girl, ready to get married. Kurt Hummel knew that he was the luckiest person of the world and he couldn't wait to share vows with Blaine.


	38. Chapter 38

**Hi Everyone!**

 **Thank you for waiting so patiently! I'm alive and doing better, although there's another surgery waiting for me.**

 **This is the final chapter of this story. It's been a long ride but I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Thank you, dear readers!**

Kurt Hummel had had exact plans for his wedding. He had started thinking about it s many years earlier, probably around the age of 3 when he had designed the first formal outfits for his toys. He had played with the idea of getting married so many times. He had imagined what his husband would be like, what colors they would use, how his clothes would look like. He imagined a wedding with a lot of guests, in bright sunlight, with music and exotic food and everything possible. Now, as a 31-year-old man, for the first time in his life, didn't care about those details. Right now as he was about to marry the man of his life.

The day of the wedding was right 8 months after Emily's birth. Blaine didn't want to hurry, he knew how important details were for Kurt and he wanted the best for his love. Kurt, on the other hand, didn't want to wait any longer. He thought that he had already lost too much precious time and he wanted to get married as soon as possible. He didn't want to wait long months, or worse years for he best place, for the best band, because that didn't matter anymore. He only wanted to be Blaine's husband.

That didn't mean that Kurt didn't take things seriously. The day when he said yes had to be wonderful. He still wanted a romantic wedding but without too much wedding stress. He was glad he didn't have to be afraid of depression anymore, that didn't mean he could be careless, though. His family needed him healthy and happy, he wouldn't let them down.

"You look wonderful!"

Kurt looked at his reflection and smiled before turning back around. His friends were all there with him. Blaine was getting ready in the other room, probably freaking out before their big moment and Kurt wanted to go there and help him calm down. But thy had made a promise not to see each other before the wedding.

"Thank you, ladies" Kurt said. "You look wonderful as well."

That was true. Mercedes, Rachel, Santana and Brittany were wearing the same deep red dresses with flowers in their hair. Kurt had picked out those clothes, choosing something that fitted all of them, was hot enough and also comfortable enough. Mercedes was already showing and she needed a light dress that didn't make her uncomfortable. As Kurt checked their clothes, he knew he had made the right choice.

"I can't believe you're getting married" Rachel said, fighting back tears.

"You're not going to cry, right?" Kurt asked.

"No" Rachel said but she didn't convince any of them.

"Okay, enough of this shit" Santana said impatiently. He get up and stepped to Kurt, putting her hands on his shoulder. "You look great. You have nothing to worry about. Blaine won't freak out, he won't let you in the middle of the wedding…"

"Why would he?" Kurt asked in confusion. He had never thought about that but now that Santana brought it up…

"Don't listen to her. She's just nervous" Mercedes said.

"Me? Oh, come on. When did you see me nervous?" Santana asked. "I'm not nervous."

"Sure" Mercedes smiled.

"She is" Brittany said excitedly. "You should have seen her yesterday. She practiced her speech about a million times."

"That was supposed to be our secret" Santana whispered.

"See? She's so cute when she's nervous" Brittany chirped.

Kurt laughed. He was glad for his friends' presence, it made everything so much easier.

He was about to check his hair one more time when the door opened and Jeff stormed inside.

"What's wrong?" Kurt asked.

"You have to come with me" Jeff said as he tried to catch his breath. "It's Blaine."

"What's wrong with Blaine?" Kurt asked in concern.

"You should see it" Jeff said.

Kurt didn't hesitate any longer. He joined Jeff and they quickly made their way to the other room where Blaine was supposed to get ready for the wedding.

As Kurt stepped in, he found Blaine pacing in front of the mirror. He was already dressed but his hair was still a mess, probably because he ran his fingers through it in every five seconds. He sighed, took a few steps forward, then did it again. He was clearly not okay.

"What's wrong?" Kurt asked.

"He's scared" Wes told him because Blaine didn't seem like he would answer anytime soon. Or ever.

Kurt blinked in surprise. Okay, he was a little nervous, too, but Blaine seemed more terrified than being a little worried. Kurt needed all of his willpower not to start panicking, too. He had to stay calm. It was just the natural reaction. He knew Blaine and how easily he panicked. It wasn't about getting married, he didn't change his mind, he was simply nervous because he had to go out there and play the lead role for one whole day. Blaine who hated attention was simply scared of that. Yes, that had to be the reason.

"Blaine" Kurt's voice was gentle, his movements slow as he stepped to his future husband. "Blaine, please listen to me."

It seemed like Blaine only noticed Kurt standing there when he was right in front of him. His eyes widened and he seemed to pale more than before.

"What are you doing here?" Blaine asked. "I thought we weren't supposed to see each other before the wedding."

"Do you really believe in that?" Kurt asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I-I…" Blaine tried to explain it but then he realized how stupid it was. Just Kurt's presence made everything so much clearer. Thinking that seeing each other in their outfits before the wedding would affect their marriage was really stupid, Kurt was right about that. But Blaine was still nervous. He had no idea what to do. He couldn't tell Kurt that he was scared of getting married, it had been his idea after all.

"What's wrong, Blaine?" Kurt asked. "Don't you… don't you want to marry me?"

"Of course I do!" Blaine said without hesitation. He wanted to marry Kurt. Okay, he wanted to be married to Kurt. He only wanted to skip the ceremony because it seemed so frightening. He couldn't tell Kurt that, of course, he would think that Blaine was crazy. As an adult man, he should have been able to handle so much stress.

"Then what's wrong?" Kurt asked, his voice still low and calm. "You can tell me everything, remember?"

"It's not that I don't want to get married. I…" Blaine looked up to see his friends gathering around them. It was nearly impossible to have a real serious conversation with Kurt when they were around. "Could you please leave us alone for a second?"

"But the wedding is about to start" Jeff pointed out.

"Not without us" Kurt replied. "Give us five minutes. Please."

Jeff seemed like he was about to say something but Wes grabbed his arm and pushed him out of the room to give Kurt and Blaine privacy they needed. When everyone was gone, Kurt turned back to Blaine.

"So what's wrong?" Kurt asked.

"I'm scared" Blaine admitted, looking away.

"Scared of going out there or being my husband?" Kurt asked.

"I would never be scared of being your husband" Blaine said determinedly. Then he looked down again and when he spoke up again, his voice was a lot more quite. "But… Those people will watch us the entire time."

"That's what happens when you're the one who gets married" Kurt said.

"I know but… you know that it makes me nervous when people watch me. And there's your father, too. I'm still scared of him."

"I thought you liked each other!" Kurt said.

"Well, I do like him" Blaine told him. "It's just… he can be kind of intimidating sometimes."

"Blaine…" Kurt sighed and did his best not to laugh because what Blaine was doing right now seemed so childish. He couldn't believe he wasn't the one having a panic attack and calming his nervous fiancé. "I'll be right beside you the whole time. There aren't so many people around. Just our families and friends, those who would never make fun of you. I know you can do this. We can do it together. If you want to, of course."

"I want to marry you" Blaine nodded.

"In that case, you should take a few deep breaths and let me handle your hair" Kurt said. "People are waiting for us."

"Okay" Blaine said quietly.

Although he knew that their guests were getting impatient, Kurt took his time to style Blaine's hair with gentle hands. Blaine calmed down a bit as Kurt did his hair and talked to him gently. He talked about everything that came into his mind, about honeymoon, about the house they had seen the previous week and wanted to buy, about the photos of Kurt's new designer clothes Blaine promised to take. By the time Kurt was done with his hair, Blaine was completely relaxed and ready to go out there.

"Can we go?" Kurt asked.

"Sure" Blaine smiled and took his hand.

They parted before the ceremony once again. They had agreed that their friends would walk them down the aisle. It had been a hard choice for Kurt but he chose Rachel in the end. Mercedes was constantly tired and nauseous, she wanted to be seated for the ceremony. Santana told them that she wanted a bigger role, too, so before Blaine could think of the perfect person, Santana made the choice easy for him by not giving him any chance to choose somebody else. It was Kurt who walked down the aisle with Rachel first. He took slow steps and smiled as his friends took photos of him. Everybody was there, at least everybody they needed. Their friends, Kurt's father, Carole, Finn who was holding Emily in his arms… those people who loved them and supported their relationship. Not too many people but perfectly enough for the wedding Kurt needed. His father would officiate at the wedding because it was Burt's wish and Kurt couldn't think of a better person doing the job. His father was waiting for him on the other side and smiled when Kurt finally reach him. Rachel took a step back and they waited for Blaine and Santana to arrive as well.

Blaine was a little pale, seemingly nervous of the lot of attention he got, but he kept his eyes on Kurt the whole time and the way to him didn't seem so long anymore. Santana kept a steady hand on his arm and led him through the room. When they reached Kurt, Santana squeezed his shoulder and then stepped back. Blaine joined Kurt and was glad when his soon-to-be-husband took his hand. Everything seemed so much easier when Kurt was holding his hand.

"Are you ready?" Blaine asked quietly.

"For getting married?" Kurt asked back.

"For spending the rest of our lives together" Blaine explained.

Kurt didn't need time to think. Although he had waited for Blaine for a very long time and they hadn't spent too much time together since then, he knew exactly that he wanted this. He was perfectly sure that they would spent the rest of their loves together and they would reach everything they wanted together. That was exactly what he wanted.

"Yes" Kurt said. "Yes, I am."

"That's all I wanted to hear" Blaine smiled and nodded towards Burt. It was time to make this amazing man standing beside him the happiest person of the world.


End file.
